"Story OF mY liFe"

who knows there’s something will give you a great time.

somebody feels like making anyone to laught will make you happy but....

for you know it not gonna work for one of us!

may be from 10 theres always 1 who feel diference.

we thing that if someone smile for us so do we.

but its sometime knowingly hurting you more.

you want to make them happy, they smile then laught with no doubt.

you smile for a while but...

suddenly its change when you are alone.

you trying harder make them happy, was you feel the same to?

were you feel the same on your silence? 

if you doubt about what you feel right now (on your silence)

then you are not fully understand about your self. 

you know the time when your alone it was a best way to give space for how your heart feel. 

give more time for your self. a place for you not to hiding your self, let your true feeling out. 

understand more about your self, a space where you don’t have to make anyone happy and just being the way who you are, JUST BEING YOU!! 

give more space  for you to be in silence, to understand your self more. 

silence doesn’t mean your alone but it was a time for you, for JUST GIVE YOU A SPACE TO UNDERSTAND ABOUT WHO TRULY YOU ARE!!

and to thanks to your self a little bit more. 

i already prepare for that when it happen but...

i never think that it will have really a big impact,

going here and there to calming down the effect that i think will gone really fast and easy but... yah kinda hard to forget and let it go...

i've prepare my self for this when it happen, but its still hurting deeply inside me, more than i think i can handle.

i said to my self that i'm strong enought to handle this..

i do it again and again..

from time to times, sometime i do forget it but...

i never realise that someday it will leave a hole inside, a big one and so deep.

trying to cover it day by day without knowing that it will take this long until i realise it again.

never stoping my self from forgeting but now i know that i just a human not a super woman who can handle every things easy.

but..

 for you know...  i'll always trying...  not for you but for me.