Life from a Minion's Perspective

Here’s a short playthrough of YYB for those of you who are struggling to work out a strategy. (No darigan Yooyu this time, I’m afraid, but there is a faerie.)

Altador: Symphony Impossible to Play

Brightvale: Homestuck Vol. 7: At the Price of Oblivion

Darigan Citadel: Prospit & Derse

Faerieland: Song of Skaia

Haunted Woods: coloUrs and mayhem: Universe A  [cw: gun metaphor - “Your Universe”; death, violence, hearing voices - “Temporal Shenanigans”]

Kiko Lake:  Alternia

Krawk Island: Squiddles! [cw: debt, implied murder, ableist slur, depression - “Catchyegrabber”; mild swearing, nudity mention, peril - “Plumbthroat Gives Chase”; death, crying children - “Squiddles the Movie Trailer - The Day the Unicorns Couldn’t Play”; off-key singing - “Mister Bowman Tells You About the Squiddles”; death mention, guilt-trip, unexpected eldritch horrors - “Let the Squiddles Sleep”]

Kreludor: Homestuck Vol. 8 [cw: alcohol mention, knife mention, gun mention - “I’m a Member of the Midnight Crew”]

Lost Desert: The Wanderers 

Maraqua: The Felt [cw: high pitched rewind/fast-forward noises - “Omelette Sandwich”]

Meridell: Genesis Frog

Moltara: Cherubim [cw: snakes, skulls - (album cover art); Flowey laugh - “The Lordling”]

Mystery Island: Medium [cw: water/ocean/diving sound effects - “Light”]

Roo Island: Homestuck Vol. 1-4 [cw: stuck record skipping effect - “Nannaquin”]

Shenkuu: Homestuck Vol. 6: Heir Transparent [cw: ableist slur - “Game Bro”; blasphemy - “I Don’t Want to Miss a Thing”]

Terror Mountain: One Year Older [cw: explicit lyrics, shouting - “Nic Cage Song”]

Tyrannia: Mobius Trip and Hadron Kaleido [cw: hunting mention - “Dawn of Man”; ableist slur, drug mention, dying mention - “Fly”; mortality, claustrophobia - “Lies with the Sea”; mind control, death threats, dying mention - “Pumpkin Tide”]

in short simple terms, its not worth playing SS while you can be more efficient playing SOSD.

I did some time-calculations and small maths in order to find out what game is most worth your time, and which ones are not.

I did this by calculating the time it takes to get to each valid score and multiplying that by the number of games it takes to get a full point towards your rank.

Yooyuball (YYB): 180s per game * 1 game per point = 180s per point. HOWEVER, for each goal scored (no matter which side) the clock decreases by 8 seconds. So, for the bare minimum winning (1 goal for you), it would be: 172s per game * 1 game per point = 172s per game.  STILL, you can get less time by scoring or letting the opponent score on you. I took an average of 10 goals between the two. 180s per game - 80s of scoring time = 100s per game * 1 game per point = 100s per point Slushie Slinger (SS): 162s per game * 2 games per point = 324s per point

Make Some Noise  (MSN): 9s per game * 12 games per point = 108s per point

Shootout Showdown (SOSD): 6s per game * 12 games per point = 72s per point

So, SOSD is fastest, then its YYB (with scored goals), then MSN, then SS by far. You can always improve time with YYB (more goals), MSN(type faster) & SOSD(shoot faster), but you have to wait in SS, which makes it so ineffective.

So JumpStart… maybe consider a rebalance soon?

Happy Altador Cup XII!

HAPPY ALTADOR CUP!!!! this is only my third year playing the cup so I’m sure I still have a lot to learn too but for now I’m happy to help you guys out!!!!! I’m gonna break this up into segments since there’s a lot and the guide itself is under the cut. Also I’ve never looked at any guides by anyone else so if it’s similar to anything preexisting I promise it’s pure coincidence!!!!

(I prefer to play with my team on the right, going for the opponent’s net on the left. If you play the other way, just mirror this on the other side!!!!)