oh yknow

It all comes to head during one of your daily asylum sessions, and you find yourself alone with them in their office. Maybe you're a bit nervous, because it feels that Harper has a different air to them, but when you examine their face, their voice, their body language, nothing seems amiss.

There's no chairs, and they ask for you to take a seat. You know what they want, you've done this before, but you still want to be difficult. So you sit on the desk. They ask you again, and you swear you see their eye twitch, hear a shift in their tone, but it's so subtle that you're not sure if it's real or if you just imagined it.

But it's making you uneasy, so you comply. And they wrap their arm around your waist, as usual, but their hold feels tighter than normal.

To your surprise, they don't ask you to kiss them this time. Instead, they ask you stuff like: how come you've been so difficult? Don't you know that they're only trying to help you? You make their job so much harder- and for what? Do you get some sick satisfaction, seeing them fail?

Their hold tightens the longer they ramble on, and it starts to hurt.

You plead for them to calm down, you say that they're hurting you, and for a second you think Harper had ignored you until they tighten their grip even more in response, pulling you closer to them in the process. You try to look away, but they cup your jaw with their free hand and force you to look them in the eye. They tell you that you're only hurting yourself, denying their treatment. You're doing nothing to help yourself. It's like you don't want to get better, why's that?

They pause, squinting at you in thought. And then, a wide grin forms on their face. It's... unsettling.

And they chuckle. (It's not pleasant.)

And when they speak again, their tone shifts,,, to something giddy? Obsessive? You don't really know how to describe it, but it scares you.

They go on to ramble that maybe you're doing this on purpose, refusing to get better so you can stay here longer, stay with them longer. You try to shake your head, argue, anything, and Harper lets go of your jaw and presses a cold finger to your lips, making hushed noises.

You see an opportunity and take it.

So you bite. Hard. And you taste a hint of blood.

Harper yelps before shoving you off of them, the tiled floor waiting for you, and you must've landed a bit too hard a bit too fast, because your head is swimming and fuzzy and you swear you're seeing stars, and Harper is on top of you in what feels like a instant.

And they're yelling now, but not out of worry, no. They're angry. And their tight grip is back, but this time their fingernails are digging into your arms and ow OW OW it stings, yet it feels numb at the same time. You don't know what they're saying, but you're too out of it to care.

Something changes in Harper's tone a few minutes in (?) (was it minutes? it felt like hours) though, to something more gentle, more apologetic, but it doesn't feel soothing to you, because it's not genuine. It can't be. It's not real. (Was it ever real?) And they get up off of you. And you wish and you wish and you wish you had the strength to get up, but your head really hurts and your arms are so wobbly you can barely lift yourself up, so you can do nothing but helplessly watch as they rummage through their desk and cabinets. Harper eventually finds what they were looking for, and you do not like the humming that follows.

They approach you again and you're trying to focus long enough to see what they're holding, but your head still hurts and the lights are too bright (and god, when did they get so fucking bright-) so you're forced to close your eyes and you grit your teeth in anticipation. Harper coos and says something you can barely make out, but you think it was something along the lines of "Everything will be okay", but you don't understand how it will be if they're here. When you try to voice this, your speech is too slurred to be understandable, completely at least. You feel a hand gently pet your head.

Your attention is quickly shifted as they hold down your arm and jab you with something sharp, and a pit of dread forms in your stomach. You've gone through this enough times to know that they've drugged you, and you think that shit shit shit, what's going to happen, what are they going to do-