With all my heart

Vincent liked Rachel. Oh, yes, he liked her a lot. He saw her first time at the party organised by her father. He had some business with him to do, but he barely could remind himself for what he had come there when that beauty appeared in front of him.

He has never believe in love from first sight, especially when mother raised him otherwise. Marriage was something necessary to have an heir, nothing more nothing less. Vincent agreed with her. There were so many beautiful women and boys in the world. Why to be faithful only to the one? He watched all his life how his parents treat each other like unsavory medicine they has to swallow every day. Marriage was something necessary but not interesting. Just business.

In the moment he saw lady Dalles all what he believed suddenly changed into ashes.

Rachel was light. Rachel was happiness.

Rachel was everything what his mother, the Countess Claudia Phantomhive wasn’t. And that was the main reason the young Queen’s Watchdog kept   his visits in Dalles mansion in secret. He knew it won’t last long and his dear mother will find out Rachel existence (she was so good in that, it was scary), but maybe he can prepare a little his fair-haired angel to meeting with the dragon.

“Garden sounds absolutely wonderful.” Vincent smiled like a little mischievous boy. “It’s so hot today. We can look for a cosy shadow somewhere to rest. Call me Vincent, please, when we are alone.”

That was also amusing how Rachel’s family willingly was leaving they alone. Marriage with Phantomhives was something lower status noble houses were dreaming about, so Dalles mansion seemed to be always prepared for young couple comfort.

How delicate this woman was! Her skin, her fair eyelashes, soft lips, beautiful subtle curves in elegant dress. Vincent constantly felt butterflies in stomach next to her. Well, not only in stomach, to be honest.

“The Queen is jealous, I’m afraid, so she keeps me busy. But I fight like a lion for every moment in your charming company. Don’t I bother you with my visit today?”

“A sheltered place in the garden also sounds lovely,” Rachel said with a meek smile on her face, but a mischievous gleam in her eyes. “You have a fine taste, my Lord.”

It did not take exquisite palate to enjoy shadow when the sun was shining, or shelter for rain, but Rachel wanted to humor Vincent. It was not as through the young Earl seemed awfully full of himself, especially considering his unusual position, but she could not help herself. Why, the Earl was older than her by half a decade, yet he seemed as easy to tease as a student! In both good and bad, she wished to both encourage and to bully, both in perfect measure. Perhaps it was what seemed to hold his attention and affection so well.

“Had I known that her Majesty is my rival, I would have never entered this race,” Rachel hummed and glanced at Vincent. “I would not dare to race her for your time. Especially when I consider the vast difference in importance when it comes to her business, and mine!” Vincent was busy with matters far more paramount than what Rachel had to offer. To think that he, even so, chose to spend a sunny afternoon with her, made her feel even better still.

“Of course not,” she replied to the question. Her smile remained timid, but this time there was a hint of a genuine blush on her cheeks to contrast the previous playfulness in her blue eyes. “Where else would I be? It is a great honor for my entire family that the Earl chooses to visit us. And even more so for myself now that we are alone and I have your undivided attention.”

She thought of Ann for a moment. Her little sister had always seemed quite smitten with the Earl, which made Rachel feel quilty. She comforted herself by thinking that Ann would have let her know if her spending time with Vincent would have wounded her terribly.

“Does this visit bother you?” Rachel decided to ask before the conversation would die down. “You keep mentioning her Majesty and such, and I can’t help but wonder if your duties occupy your mind. The day is so fine that it seems like a shame, but I can’t blame you if that is the case.”

“Oh my! The Earl has been baking for my humble self? I am shocked!” She let out an easy laugh without having to utter a lie or fake a reaction. Having someone such as the Earl of Phantomhive bake something specifically for her sounded downright bizarre, yet when it came to Vincent, she did not doubt his sincerity.

“Our initials,” she noticed as she studied the biscuits closer and smiled at Vincent. “That is very romantic of you. Why, I had never thought you had such a soft side to youself!”

How she wanted to fall in his arms and kiss him!

desert. he could check the visor if he had any backup data for that since asking the bunker would equal to asking a tomb if it could talk, because he was pretty sure there was something he had to check into that other vast, almost endless wasteland, wasn’t there ? sand in dunes and waves held buried so many secrets that could help him piece back together this grotesque puzzle in his own shaky hands, but at the same time ━did he really want to solve the enigma, at the cost of all those cracked pillars holding him up falling more and more ? 

was it necessary ? was it what 2b would want from him ?

2b wouldn’t have approved, but would’ve let me. > 2b wou’ve killed me the moment i tried.

it was a doubt and a tragic realization through layers of a denial too tired to actually insist creaking deep in his hinges, and besides huffing in a shade of pain he wasn’t sure his glass eyes could ever translate in color, he had to put himself back up ━or at least in a proper sitting position, which came with a few nasty creaks suggesting some badly bent alloy of his chassis lamenting of its presence. 

2b was designed to kill those like him who had always a keen eye for investigation ━masculine chassis based androids, so problematic according to the bunker, so unable to contain themselves from developing an unnecessary humanity not meant to defend something that already wasn’t there the moment he opened his glass orbs to the vacuity of space for the first time. 2b was meant to put a constant end to his branching brain ━as if he wouldn’t realize, at some point, that his own mind was lacking something constantly, similar to poisons once used to attack someone’s memory in order to have them forget. and that triggered more curiosity, and consequently, a backup containing the only information that mattered.

she was designed to kill him. and he let her.

over, and over, and over ( ━ now at attempt #18873, first time you came out of it alive, number nine. )

« i don’t know about that ━about optimism. i guess i just more of a form of determination ? i don’t want to give up yet, because i have so many doubts━━ » and no one to answer them. 

but also no one ready to shoot right at his head and wipe everything clean before he even would try and take the first leap of faith. « ━━things i want to find answers to. closure i think i might need to move on. »

proposal: inquire the old world lifeform known as ‘emil’ about the pieces of information recently acquired.

there was a slight wince from him, and fingers still covered in consumed gloves finally taking away the piece of technological fabric from his own vision, feeling artificial pupil contract and react ‘gainst the strong lights of a sun that never would be setting like it used to millennias ago ; android boy harbored uncertainty, somehow finding space in his fractures for a genuine worry in digging something that for the other … was going to be as painful as everything that just happened was for him, as alienating. 

« i think i am good. just a little bit busted, nothing that cannot go away with the help of my pod. » which was already working on that bent alloy, considering he felt some movements around his own back alongside a familiar buzzing and sizzling. irises of soft azure dared looking at the creature and his funky little locomotion system, sparing a little, awkward smile on bruised lips. « emil … i’d like to ask you something about some things i’ve found around during my explorations. but only if you want to, because i-i don’t want to make you uncomfortable. »

Emil let 9S take his sweet time, pondering and contemplating and reminiscing. If his memory served him right, human-shaped creatures often frowned when in deep doubt. Perhaps it was what 9S was doing under his visor, too, or hidden behind the collar of his uniform. Emil had grown to realize that drawing such detailed conclusions was difficult when his head was trapped in the vehicle that served as his body. Had he been able to pout or tilt his head or bat his eyes, perhaps 9S would have been more responsive as well.

Or perhaps all that was lost on androids as well. Perhaps they felt as dismembered as Emil was.

“Choosing determination over despair is a form of optimism!” Emil tooted cheerfully. He decided to hum a little tune to emphasize his point, but quit soon enough to give 9S room to continue his train of thought. “And doubts are what keep you alive,” he continued, but with slightly less confidence. He could not have justified his argument if 9S has asked him to, especially if he had asked if androids truly lived. “If you have no doubts, you just keep going and going. And going and going and going. Never stopping! You become a machine of self-assurance! It can feel good, but when you lose that self-assurance, what’s left?” And such thing would be utterly useless. Not that Emil had much to argue about the matter of usefulness, yet still...

“You YoRHa androids are so cool!” Emil said as he turned his heavy body to admire the work the golden nanobots did on 9S’s body. Truly, if all the Emils wandering the Earth could not destroy the machines, perhaps YoRHa with their impressive technology would. Ending the war... War was all that was left, but Emil did want it to end. He really did!

“You can ask me anything, friend!” Emil said, grateful to have something else to think about, and ever so happy to feel useful. “I’ve seen all sorts of things. Oh boy, if you just knew! When you look around, you might think it’s all either desert or war, but there are layers to this world! I’ll be excited to answer aaanything you’re curious about!”

“A… Attractive? Oh, I’m afraid I see them all as my upperclassmen and my friends! But since you asked, it is only polite of me to give you my opinion. Um…

“Well, Mr Clayton surely looks a little bit like Professor Michaelis when he takes off his spectacles and styles his hair, doesn’t he? But Mr Kadar’s confidence reminds me of the pure and assertive self-esteem Professor Michaelis radiates! And, well, even though Mr Midford can act quite bashful and, might I say, ladylike in certain situations, I have seen him assert very masculine dominance on stage! It truly took me aback, and at times I cannot stop thinking about it! I believe he is a bit of a late bloomer with plenty of potential!

“Mr Cheslock plays violin very well…”

——————————————–

“Darling, no one in this house is brave enough to accuse me of anything. And has you just said my garden an orangery is a trivial nonsense?”

Claudia was not only higher in the noble rank than Rachel, she was also taller, that’s why when both women stood up from the table, the Countess Phantomhive was resembling now a black panther preparing to jump on the innocent doe. 

What Vincent was seeing in her? Is her hips enough wide to give him a son? Rachel seemed to look so fragile. But she has got a beautiful smile and white teeth. 

It’s not enough to be a future lady Phantomhive, though.

“Then I expect you has got more serious and important activities. Tell me then. I like when people are able to impress me”.

Claudia smiled nicely, taking Rachel under arm and leading the girl on the terrace and further down through stairs straight to the garden. It was looking quite ordinary as far. Rose bushes, sand paths and stone figures of beautiful fantastic creatures among well trimmed trees.

But with time and walk the nature was… wilder and darker taking shapes of tunnels and labyrinths. Even Claudia’s nails seemed to be longer and more pinning in the soft Rachel’s arm.

@decordetotaliter​

"Please, Lady Phantomhive,” Rachel said as they stood up, skirts scuffling, hers brightly colored for an afternoon stroll, and the Countess’s dark, fitting for a widow, “I would never imply such thing. I apologise for my careless words, as I have a terrible habit of speaking my mind during the most inappropriate situations, but I have nothing but praise for your estate. If I ever come off as inappropriate, please assume it is due to my inexperience and enthusiasm, and not ill will!”

Perhaps the Countess would let her grudge go if Rachel would show her the feeling was not mutual. That was not to say that the Lady Phantomhive was not about to lose her heir to Rachel - of course not! But she could be persuasive when she wanted to. Much so with Vincent, so why not also his mother?

They crossed the courtyard. It appeared that the Countess was indeed longing for the fresh air of the woods and wild nature, as their yourney continued towards the vast forests that surrounded the Phantomhive manor.

“Surely my embroidery and dancing is nothing compared to the Countess’s,” Rachel joked effortlessly, smiling even as Lady Phantomhive’s fingernails dug into the thin fabric of her sleeve as if to pierce it and claw at her skin. Truly a test to see whether younger lady could be thin skinned! “I do also play some piano and sing, but I doubt we will find one in here! However, I have heard that my lady has an interest in horseback riding and hunting! It sounds exciting! I do admire women who do not shy away from male spaces.”

“Oh! I would have loved to have a little girl, had my health not been too fragile for another childbirth. However, when I was bearing my little boys I always knew I would not have a girl. With how lively they were, I was convincend it was the heir of Phantomhive in my belly!

Since my lord husband did not show interest in the naming process, and as I am very fond of French names, I am quite certain I would have chosen something similar to go with my vision. These children are a gift from Heaven, and I want their names to reflect the skies. Besides, it is very fashionable!”

Very Vague Starters: accepting 

“Why, I believe you are talking about a smile, my lord,” Rachel hummed playfully and tilted her head as if to give the Earl of Phantomhive a better look. “Could it be possible that your duties for the Queen have kept you so busy that you have forgotten what one looks like?”

Rachel knew hers was particularly beautiful, even though she tried to remind herself to stay humble. Beauty was not forever, and if all would go right, the Earl would be the one to witness it by her side until she was old and grey and her breasts could reach her belly button.

“If it has been so long since you have seen a friendly face, perhaps it is time for you to take a break and join me for a walk through the garden.”

Inquiries: accepting

32S stalled and turned around slowly. Sudden voices, even fairly familiar once, often triggered his flight reaction, a strong desire to flee.

It had to be said that his reflexes were not what they might have once been. He was a YoRHa android, or so he had been told, a single cell in an elite troop that put all other androids to shame with their extremely advanced and ever-evolving technology. 32S had once been a bright eyed scanner eager to scout the battlefield, but he had never gotten as far. The very few remaining memories he had before his… resurrection, were about his flight unit crashing down in a ball of fire, and then a long, long minutes or days of cold and loneliness with no one coming to his rescue. Not for a very long time, at least.

But there were some good people left in the desolate earth. Or rather than good, perhaps helpful. His savior was one of them. 2B was another. 32S remembered 2B and 9S, the two YoRHa units that had provided his savior with the necessary parts to fix him - well, mostly so. This time 2B did not seem to have his partner following in her trail, but the pod was still around. 32S had never been sure whether he should have greeted Pods the same as he did fellow androids. Frankly, he preferred living organisms. Like squirrels.

“Yes,” 32 said, preferring to speak in short sentences. His speech receptors were not what they had once been, but his partner was seeking a cure to his stutter, some lost words, mispronounciation and so forth. “That is because it-t… Is.” He looked down at his knee. It worked, but the grey machinery being exposed to sunlight from where his artificial skin had torn open was a telltale sign that he was not in perfect condition. “With this… I can’t jumpph.”

Ah yes, manners.

“H… Hello. 2B.”