Jun 16
i’m noticing a trend wherein i get like. idk in whatever mood it is that drives me to act in the ways i do. and then i fuck a guy and then two or however many days later they try to talk to me and my face contorts into what I can only describe as a grinch grimace
#i know the mood that drives me to do that i just can’t name it right this second#and that’s a can’t not a won’t. it’s so far from my current emotional state (disgust; at the self and… well no. largely the self)#that it’s become difficult to conceptualize#like idk i guess disgust is part of the equation but it’s more…. orange than that#god maybe I just need to raise my standards for these things#(‘everyone would aggree with this’)#i have kinda always been like this though. but it’s also gotten me some strange places#l. speaks
