florist to the underworld

they're hiring me at the extra virgin olive oil factory as the oathsworn knight who protects the chastity of the olives

many dishonourable knaves in the notes of this post

my religion is butter, garlic, cheese

i don’t think people understand how much of life is grief. not just people dying, but losing the version of yourself you thought you’d become. grieving the city you had to leave. the friends you lost not in argument, but in silence. the summer that will never come back. the feeling that maybe you peaked at 12 when you were reading books under the covers and believing in forever

People get jumpscared by house centipedes because they have like one of the fastest land speeds relative to body size among insects, or a lot of mammals, moving about 16 inches (40.6cm) a second, that's why they sometimes seem to appear out of nowhere. Like if you have a ten foot ceiling, a house centipede can go from the floor behind a bookshelf to the ceiling in the time it takes to catch up on your tumblr feed. And they're pretty harmless but also they are wildly overconfident in their ability to hold onto a ceiling.

UNPOPULAR OPINION: A lot of "mental health issues" disappear when bills are paid, rent is secure, and the fridge is full. Peace is expensive. And pretending money doesn't affect mental health is privilege.

no one cares that you shave your legs because of sensory issues shut the fuck up forever

really galling amount of people misinterpreting this post so i'd like to clarify. i'm saying that when discussions about patriarchal beauty standards and the way women are heavily shamed and coerced into eschewing their own natural state of being (hairy) are occurring, it is unhelpful (AT BEST) to interrupt and say that the reason YOU remove the hair from your body is because of sensory issues. that's not what we're talking about. stop asking for validation for doing something that society at large wants you to do. stop derailing the conversation because you feel uncomfortable about being made aware that you, for whatever reason it is, adhere to harmful, unfair and ridiculous beauty standards. you're stepping into the middle of an important conversation that needs to be had and making it all about you. shut the fuck up forever.

also quite frankly i think a lot less people would experience sensory issues if they let their hair grow out so that it isn't bristly and rough and irritating. and i cannot help but wonder why these sensory issues aren't as predominant in men. maybe you're uncomfortable with the hair on your body because you've been taught to be uncomfortable with it. just a thought.

there are places in the world today that are experiencing 40°C for the first time in recorded history. of course there's no way to know whether chucking billionaires into volcanos will appease the sun god but i feel we're doing the scientific method a disservice if we don't at least try