know no shame

This goes for other symptoms as well: although pain can definitely contribute to people’s experiences of these symptoms, fatigue and brain fog are actual migraine symptoms, not just pain symptoms.

Diese Folge ist der 1126. Tatort und lief am 29.03.2020. Es ermitteln Charlotte Lindholm und Anaïs Schmitz in Göttingen.

@daughterofhecata Not to mention they still get sex trafficked in the Capitol after. Like they played the games, they won, they bought into the system that told them it was glory for them and abundance for their district.

Except the abundance only lasts one year and is limited. It never allows them to truly thrive or rise beyond the boot of the Capitol on their necks. At the end of the day this "generosity" is just another tool to keep them all in line.

And after the initial celebration at home, they find that the Capitol isn't done with them, with the commodification and abuse of their bodies. It never ends. They're never free. Their options, their "rewards" are being sex trafficked like Finnick or being punished like Joanna and Haymitch with the deaths of everyone they love.

I was thinking that adding that as well might not entirely fit with the "concept" of each book centering on one specific instance of the Games (except Mockingjay ofc), but actually.

It would work so well from a mentor's perspective.

"baptise me in hot dog water"

Hot dog water - there's a Tumblr post out there I've seen saying hot dog water is the opposite of holy water, due to the fact that a single drop of it will contaminate what it touches. I assume this was partly inspired by this allusion but who knows for sure.

Also the the idea of holy water as inhuman and cleaning vs hot dog water as the remains of feeding someone - often a child - and entirely human. It may be dirty and I do not want it on me but God hot dog water has some memories. You will not wash away my sins. They're mine. Also, anyone can make hot dog water but holy water is refined, restricted (yes anyone can make it in an emergency but lay people are restricted from it)

"you and I both know"

Unlike baptism for babies, this one is done between two people who are both aware of what is happening. The one receiving the baptism gives the orders about what they want to happen. The giver and receiver are portrayed as equals. They are equally aware of their humanity.

"the holy stuff won't take"

Ooof heartbreaking, amazing line. Raises so many questions. What does it mean when the water "takes"? What has the receiver done that makes them unfit for holy water? Or, what has the holy water done that makes it to weak to help, to be a part of your life?

Meter

There are two readings of the poem's meter that I immediately identify, the first is how I'd want to read it, and the second is how a normal person would probably read it, but both make the same point.

In my interpretation (left), the first line is four wholely irregular feet: an iamb into a dibrach into two trochees; The second line is two trouches into a hanging stressed syllable; And the third line is three iambs.

In the more normal interpretation(right), the first line and second line are six trochees all together plus that hanging syllable in 'knowing' which transitions the poem to iambic trimeter.

And look at the interesting result of that laid bare:

In English poetry there's a tradition, all other things being equal, that iambs are considered the sophisticated foot with trochees often being contrasted as the vulgar or common foot.

The vulgar in specificity "hot dog water" is put in trochee, while the respectably vague "the holy stuff" is afforded iambs. Without the poet having thought of the stress things the pattern actively, this incapulation of the English poetic tradition is astounding. Especially when you consider the

Chiasmus

Chiasmus is a figure of rhetorical construction, in which two pairs of ideas are laid across each other, A B B A. It's one of the more popular figures of rhetoric and if you're looking for it you'll see it everywhere.

In the most literal sense, it's about repetition; but, you can apply it more liberally to ideas, thoughts, or in this case, parts of speech:

The nouns and verb pairs in the first and third lines crossover each other. They are in chiasmus. Structurally, the inversion makes the poem feel more solid, while still furthering emphasizing the contrast between the idea of hot dog water and the holy stuff.

You may need to learn how to set up your paints and such… but this is what people did, live, while the show aired. That’s what the show was for. I had family members create lovely works of art they enjoyed, which I still have on my walls, because William Alexander and Bob Ross both said:

SCREW METICULOUS CLASSICAL ART PRACTICES — JUST GRAB A PALETTE KNIFE AND BIG OLD BRUSH AND PAINT!

They freed a whole generation of people who were taught to paint detail and realism and exact representation of reality — people who largely gave up this kind of thing because it got tedious.

I watched the joy of family members as they rediscovered art as a messy fun spontaneous half hour activity.

My father would constantly viciously mock my body hair and other 'masculine' traits to disprove the idea that I was a 'real girl', but then he was the same man who screamed at me for six hours when he found out I was trying out presenting as male when I was trying out different gender presentations as a middle schooler and tried leaning into masculinity for a bit, then he'd treat me like a boy again when he'd tell me not to cry because 'men dont cry', then he treated me like a girl again when I developed breasts and he clearly decided I was attractive to him.

My mother refused to teach me how to do my makeup or buy me dresses and once she realized I was never going to get a period she practically gave up on treating me like a woman at all, but then when I told her I might try leaning more masc as a teenager she was suddenly so adamant about gendering me as the girliest girl in the whole world, then once I realized I was a woman she seemed to flip right back and cut off my whole length of hair ostensibly because it was 'matted' but probably because she doesn't like me presenting as a woman.

My peers would scream at me for wearing dresses or mock me for wearing makeup because "boys don't do that" and I was seen as a predatory or mockworthy boy dressing up, but then that didn't stop my male peers from leering at me and making sexual passes that revolved around me being 'female'.

My transmasc ex would play up how aggressive I was while making himself look like an innocent widdle guy in comparison, playing on the fact that I was intersex and transfem and therefore he could twist me into being "masculine and scary" when needed, but then he'd put the emotional labor and sexualization and condescension of womanhood onto me just as easily.

It's like no matter what you do, people are determined to oppositely gender you. 'Woman' enough to sexually harass and assault, 'man' enough to be harassed for even trying to present as feminine, 'woman' enough to be burdened with all the emotional labor of my family and relationships, 'man' enough to be painted as the horrible pushy aggressor no matter what I did.

Well I don't like how it feels. I don't feel cleaner without body hair. I don't prefer not having body hair. But who will advocate for women like me, but me? For women who do like hair removal, they are advocated for every time they step out of the house and see 99% of the female population also conforming to that standard, or when they watch a movie and see all the shaved actresses, or view an advertisment, or open a magazine, or watch a music video, or scroll through social media, or walk down the streets without receiving insults and glares for having a completely normal bodily feature.

david, commission. 2019

i am aware that this piece of mine has been re-posted a thousand times, but now you can re-blog it from the original artist! :~D