Let Me In

♫ She's a textbook clear avoidant Never knowin' what she needs You gave me promises and I believed you I was down to love you babe But, honey, I should've known better Said ya need time and space But I won't be around forever Do what you want ♫

I feel like I've lost you and you weren’t even mine 'Cause you were straight out the dark when I laid it all on the line And it's not like I would’ve called it love Just would’ve been nice to know I was enough Oh, I never feared being alone, but it's all that's been on my mind 'Cause now it feels like Everywhere that I look, everyone that I see Like a fairytale book, hand in hand on the street I can’t be the only one on Earth When's it gonna, whеn’s it gonna be my turn?

♫ I thought you'd be battered and bruised Or a little confused On the day I called it quits You didn't even flinch ♫

♫ I waited by my phone 'til you text me back Always put you first while you put me last I still have your picture up on my fridge And I'm missing you but not what you did Almost wish we didn't have memories So I wouldn't think about you and me ... I deserve someone to love me Someone who's proud to hold me Someone who feels like anytime we're in a crowd Thеre's nobody else around You still want mе through the good, the bad and the ugly And damn it hurts But thanks to you I finally learned All the things I don't deserve ♫

♫ I don't wanna waste another year Maybe we could break the cycle here Maybe we could make a promise that we will see this through 'Cause I can't say goodbye to you ... I need someone to be Here in the daylight when it's all falling down on me Tell me, it's alright and I'm somebody good for you Not just somebody to use when you're here laying on me Not just another body ♫

♫ I feel dirty, I feel rotten, and the colors are all flat I'm a sad shell of a woman and I've got maggots for brains But that's just a thing that happens when my When my baby goes away What can I do (When my baby goes away) But think of you? ♫

♫ And I'm just searching up my symptoms Desperate to fix 'em I'll do anything 'Cause lately I've been spiraling, oh I'm not feeling like myself and Nothing ever seems to help Went to the doctor and she said I was fine But every movie that I see makes me cry It's like somebody put a weight on my chest I should talk to a friend But I can't get out of bed My head is spinning and my stomach is sick Say I'm in love, so it's hard to admit I can't eat, I can't sleep I think you're what's wrong with me ♫

♫ Maybe I could take a loser lesson A new distraction from this damn depression Treat the symptoms, never the infection Smiling while it's getting harder ... I need an answer 'Cause I can't sleep I'm not a real good dancer But I'm still on my feet ♫

♫ I'm not kissing any boy that is passive Their indecision is painfully unattractive Past mistakes are just new information These days, I've got expectations ♫

♫ All that I want is to know undoubtedly That you just have eyes for me Could you make it clear? All that I want is to sit here silently And watch movies on TV What a shame you're not here Here to witness my devotion And my endless well of needs I'm an anchor in the ocean You know I could never leave ... I'm overwhelmed, I'm underfed And yet I still cling ... I'm a penny in a fountain (In a fountain) Just waiting on my luck to change So, I'm patient, you're learning, pretend it's not hurting, oh (Oh) 'Cause they say it's a virtue to not let good love slip away ('Way) So, I'm cool and forgiving, I'll take what you're giving, oh (Ooh) But nothing's quite enough, when I know that to get it, I begged Yeah, to get it, I begged ♫

♫ Like water in the palm of my hand I feel you slipping through No matter how hard I try I can't hold on to you So tell me here and now Don't drag my heart around If you're gonna break me in two Do what you gotta do ♫

The cool girl begins as Amy Dunne’s nightmare diagnosis, becomes Tove Lo’s danceable defense mechanism, and ends with Gracie Abrams quietly pretending she is fine. In this essay I will…

♫ I'm just somewhere that you go Someone who takes off your clothes I only see you after midnight I'm just somebody you use I'm like a vampire to you You never see me in the daylight You, you love all the attention You just keep me hangin' on … You took me to a new dimension You love leading me on You trick me, tie me in a knot You treat me like an afterthought ♫

♫ Well, sooner or later, you'll find out I live in a pattern of breakdowns You'll bend to my silence, it's so loud And then you'll lose me to the crowd ♫

♫ Maybe one night when you walk me home Your hand in mine warms up the cold And you'll look at me and finally know That you're ready for, what you're ready for You apologize for wasted time (Almost, so close) And the promises that you let die (Maybe) For a second it feels like it might be real life (Almost, so close) (Maybe) But I'll settle for almost, so close, maybe You're not mine but you're almost, so close, baby ♫

♫ I wanna be somebody to you (Somebody to you) But if you just want a warm body, that works too (That works too) In my dreams, you need someone to catch you when you fall, and I'm on call Should you set yourself on fire I'm on call Should you get struck with desire You got my number Should you need anything at all I'll make myself real available (I'm on, on call) ♫

♫ At least I wasn't afraid to jump At least I didn't just say what you wanted At least I didn't lead you on Least I took care of your emotions I'm allowed to say it hurts even if it meant nothing to you I won't apologize for all the ways I moved around you I'm not embarrassed or stupid for falling apart I think it's beautiful I let myself Fall this hard ♫