DarkqueenKat

😭😭😭

they call me the endurer the way i endure and endure and endure and endure and well u get it

Jean Moreau

so when shane joins ottawa it’s obviously great and happy until he and ilya realize that this means that shane is always going to have two more cups than ilya no matter what. it also means that — due to their freak nature — whenever shane has the smallest injury, ilya starts gloating about how this means shane will have to retire and ilya will just have to go on and win more cups than shane. shane will stub his toe on the coffee table one day and ilya immediately goes “we will have to put you down. no more cups for shane hollander. his husband wins them all now.” “FUCK YOU ROZANOV.”

holy shit. this guy on the bus talking to a girl about how he trades stocks. and she goes “have you seen american psycho” and he said no i dont watch movies. im too busy trading

out of the many tragic parts of martin blackwood’s life, I cannot even imagine how gutted I would be to discover my controversially older crush was actually younger than me.

god… december 2025 canadian government tax funded hockey yaoi induced psychosis i will never forget you <333333

“Human-Steve! I have heard that today is the anniversary of your hatching! According to my human culture pamphlet, it is customary to set a sugary pastry on fire while chanting your species’ growth incantation and presenting sacrifices wrapped in shiny paper. I am afraid to ask, in case this ritual is sacred and this request therefor insensitive… but may I be allowed to participate? It sounds much more fascinating than molting.”

“Human Steve, I have read about your ritual dance called ‘The Hokey Pokey,’ performed mostly at mate-bonding celebrations after the guests reach an elevated level of intoxication. But Human Steve, how do I know WHICH left foot to put in, put out, and shake all about? I do not… Human Steve, why are you laughing?”