RED THREE

you’ve got mail. either muse reacting to yours having left a dirty voice mail.

↳ Day Three - Merlin - Lancelot Du Lac

“ you’ve  just  brought  yourself  a  death  wish . ” “ but  no  man  can  live  forever ,  except  he  who  possesses  the  heart  of  a  star . ” “ yeah ,  i  have  a  bubbling  candle . ” “ did  you  really  mean  what  you  said ? ” “ but …  you  were  a  mouse !  you  were  a  mouse !  you  wanted  cheese ! ” “ i  asked  you  to  give  me  a  sign . ” “ and  risk  you  being  too  embarrassed  to  keep  saying  such  lovely  things ? ” “ are  we  human  because  we  gaze  at  the  stars ,   or  do  we  gaze  at  them  because  we  are  human ? ” “ do  the  stars  gaze  back ?  now  that’s  a  question . ” “ you  know  when  i  said  i  knew  little  about  love ?  well  that  wasn’t  true . ” “ i  know  a  lot  about  love . ” “ i’ve  seen  centuries  and  centuries  of  it . ” “ it  was  the  only  thing  that  made  watching  your  world  bearable . ” “ you  could  search  the  furthest  reaches  of  the  universe  and  never  find  anything  more  beautiful . ” “ what  i’m  trying  to  say ,  ( name ) ,  is  that  i  think  i  love  you . ” “ my  heart ,  it  feels  like  my  chest  can  barely  contain  it .   like  it  doesn’t  belong  to  me  anymore . ”  “ it  belongs  to  you .  and  if  you  wanted  it ,  i’d  wish  for  nothing  in  exchange .  no  gifts ,  no  goods ,  no  demonstrations  of  devotion .  nothing  but  knowing  that  you  love  me  too .  just  your  heart  in  exchange  for  mine . ” “ you’re  very  close . ” “ you  speak  as  if  this  is  good  news . ” “ do  i  need  to  remind  you  that  wall  is  not  part  of  our  universe ? ” “ if  she  crosses  that  threshold  into  the  human  realm ,  our  star  becomes  nothing  more  than  a  pitted  lump  of  metallic  rock . ” “ then  i  suggest  you  hurry  up ! ” “ would  i  be  correct  in  thinking  that  you  can  neither  see  nor  hear  me ? ” “ i’d  like  to  tell  you  that  you  smell  of  pee . ” “ i  swear ,  if  i  don’t  get  my   ( name )  back  as  he  was ,  i’ll  be  your  personal  poltergeist ! ” “ that’s  my  flower ! ” “ eighteen  years  i’ve  been  looking  for  that !  give  it  to  me  now . ” “ how  dare  you ! ” “ what  the  hell  did  you  do ? ” “ what  did  i  do ?  what  did  you  do ?! ” “ has  your  mind  become  as  decrepit  as  your  face ? ” “ you  dare  steal  truth  from  my  lips  by  feeding  me  limbus  grass ?! ” “ do  you  have  any  idea  what  a  big  mistake  you’ve  made ? ” “ what  is  it  to  be ,  prince  charming ?  frog  or  tadpole ? ” “ seek  all  you  like .  you  shall  not  see  the  star ,  touch ,  smell ,  or  hear  it .  you  will  not  even  perceive  her  if  she  stands  before  you . ” “ what  do  stars  do ?  they  shine . ”

“  i wish i knew how to talk about it.  ”   “  you don’t have to talk, we can just sit together.  ”   “  i don’t want to be alone anymore.  ”   “  i wish i could hate you.  ”  “  take a seat, we’re gonna be here a while.  ” “  i need you to trust me.  ”   “  i missed/miss you.  ”   “  she/he won’t listen to me.  ” “  let me do this for you. please.  ”   “  is there anything else you want to say to me?  ” “  tell me something happy.  ”   “  promise me.  ” “  i just want/wanted to help.  ”   “  let me explain.  ” “  i didn’t/don’t need you to understand, i just wanted/want you to support me.  ”   “  i’m on your side.  ” “  i’ve got your back, okay? ” “  please, tell me you have a plan.  ” “  stay with me tonight.  ” “  don’t go. please.  ”   “  i’ve been alone for so long i’m afraid i don’t know what it’s like not to be.  ”   “  talk to me.  ”   “  i did what i had to do.  ” “  we can’t keep going on like this.  ” “  i’m just tired.  ” “  i’m scared.  ” “  it’s okay to be afraid. fear can be good. use it.  ” “  it’s better to expect disappointment.  ” “  hope is dangerous.  ” “  i like seeing you smile.  ”   “  you look beautiful.  ”   “  be patient with her/him. they’re trying. ”   “  i’m trying my best and it’s not good enough. it’s never good enough. ” “  i’m starting to think i’m just fucked up.  ”   “  have a drink with me.  ” “  she/he is better off without me. but i guess that’s their choice.  ” “  you can’t dictate what’s best for someone else. ” “  can i help you?  ” “  i thought you’d like this.  ” “  do you wanna get out of here?  ” “  walk with me?  ” “  well, shit.  ”

independent  biggs  darklighter  from  the  star  wars  franchise. loved  by  dj

pixel © to sugarthemis

❝  i saw then how i had changed.  ❞ ❝  name one hero who was happy — you can’t.  ❞ ❝  i feel like i could eat the world raw.  ❞ ❝  you are half my soul, as the poets say.  ❞ ❝  i have no need to forgive you. you cannot offend me.  ❞ ❝  i do not fear ridicule. i never have.  ❞ ❝  you have always trusted so easily; you have had so little in your life to fear or suspect.  ❞ ❝  do you hear me? please, say something.  ❞ ❝  your face is like quicksilver, always racing to something new. you unsettle me.  ❞ ❝  you do not give things up so easily now as you once did.  ❞ ❝  now i know how to make you follow me everywhere.  ❞ ❝  i would know your face in dark or disguise. i would know it even in madness.  ❞ ❝  there is no law that gods must be fair.  ❞ ❝  i have never seen anyone fight the way you do.  ❞ ❝  our dead come for their vengeance regardless of witnesses.  ❞ ❝  the sorrow was so large it threatened to tear through my skin.  ❞ ❝  when you die, all things soft and beautiful and bright would be buried with you.  ❞ ❝  you were always better with words than i.  ❞ ❝  i will never leave you. it will be this, always, for as long as you will let me.  ❞ ❝  you smile, and your face is like the sun.  ❞ ❝  i thought you were — something. you do not — you do not move like a human.  ❞ ❝  do you want to walk up to the woods?  ❞ ❝  you can’t be very wounded if you can stand for so long.  ❞ ❝  there are no bargains between lion and men. i will kill you and eat you raw.  ❞ ❝  we are like gods at the dawning of the world.  ❞ ❝  nothing could eclipse the stain of this dirty, mortal mediocrity.  ❞ ❝  i yearn for the darkness and silence of the underworld, where i can rest.  ❞ ❝  those seconds, half seconds, that the line of our gaze connected, were the only moment in my day that i felt anything at all.  ❞ ❝  you seem utterly unaware of your effect on the people around you.  ❞ ❝  it was almost like fear, in the way it filled me, rising in my chest. it was almost like tears, in how swiftly it came.  ❞ ❝  you are a weapon, a killer. do not forget it.  ❞ ❝  i have heard that men who live by a waterfall cease to hear it — in such a way did i learn to live beside the rushing torrent of my doom.  ❞ ❝  if you have to go, you know i will go with you.  ❞ ❝  there is no one like you.  ❞ ❝  we have given each other wounds, but they are not mortal.  ❞ ❝  and perhaps it is the greater grief, after all, to be left on earth when another is gone.  ❞ ❝  who can be ashamed to lose to such beauty? it is enough to watch you win.  ❞ ❝  do not let what you have gained this day be so easily lost.  ❞ ❝  you have killed them and taken your vengeance. it is enough.  ❞ ❝  no man is worth more than another, wherever he is from.  ❞ ❝  strange that such a small kindness feels like grace.  ❞ ❝  you can use a spear as a walking stick, but that will not change its nature.  ❞ ❝  i cannot bear to see you grieving.  ❞ ❝  i remember little more than scattered images from my life then.  ❞ ❝  i would recognize you by touch alone, by smell; i would know you blind, by the way your breaths came and your feet struck the earth. i would know you in death, at the end of the world.  ❞ ❝  i see a dozen men here ready to leap on each other’s throats.  ❞ ❝  in my land a bow is marked as the weapon of cowards.  ❞ ❝  you may still make a good person.  ❞ ❝  you don’t bother to threaten me, yet. i should be worth threatening.  ❞ ❝  the memories well up like springwater, faster than i can hold them back.  ❞ ❝  i hoped that you would come.  ❞ ❝  the voices of the dead were said to have the power to make the living mad.  ❞ ❝  i have weathered the anger of gods before.  ❞ ❝  i thought of how many nights i had lain awake in this room, loving you in silence.  ❞ ❝  there is nothing in the world i want more than to know what you had not said.  ❞ ❝  you will never gain fame from your fighting. does this surprise you?  ❞ ❝  my mind is filled with cataclysm and apocalypse: i wish for earthquakes, eruptions, flood. only that seems large enough to hold all of my rage and grief.  ❞ ❝  i will not cry in front of you.  ❞ ❝  listen to me. you go too far in this. i will not be able to protect you.  ❞ ❝  there is no honor in betraying your friends.  ❞ ❝  i’m afraid I have been prompted by a rare stirring of guilt.  ❞ ❝  i promised myself that if i ever saw you again, i would keep my thoughts behind my eyes.  ❞ ❝  i did not want you to see my fear, though normally we kept nothing from each other.  ❞ ❝  gods and mortals never mix happily in our stories.  ❞ ❝  you will be dead soon enough.  ❞ ❝  you are destroying yourself. you will not be loved for this, you will be hated, and cursed.  ❞ ❝  you left yourself today. and now you are returned.  ❞ ❝  you are a better person than i.  ❞ ❝  whatever you do, i shall stand with you, as i always have.  ❞ ❝  you have looked at me a thousand thousand times, but there is something different in this gaze, an intensity i do not know.  ❞ ❝  my life is my reputation. it is all i have.  ❞ ❝  may i give you some advice? if you are truly his friend, you will help him leave this soft heart behind.  ❞ ❝  what are you thinking about?  ❞ ❝  even the boldest of people would whisper a prayer if they brushed against me.  ❞ ❝  the keen edge of my envy was like flint, a spark away from fire.  ❞ ❝  do you think we fight hopeless wars?  ❞ ❝  it is strange, that you would speak against betrayal.  ❞ ❝  if every soldier killed only those who’d personally offended him, we’d have no wars at all.  ❞ ❝  no one has ever tried to take something from me.  ❞ ❝  stay behind me.  ❞ ❝  will you help me put the rest of my armor on?  ❞ ❝  your face is blank and barren, like another language, impenetrable.  ❞ ❝  i am here because i believe that we will win. i am staying until the end.  ❞ ❝  your presence is like a stone in my shoe, impossible to ignore.  ❞ ❝  he is not worthy of you. he never has been.  ❞ ❝  will you tell me who hurt you?  ❞ ❝  it is like a nightmare; i expect, each moment, to wake to relief. but there is no waking.  ❞ ❝  i do not need to prove myself to you. to any of you.  ❞ ❝  you have always thought too much of yourself.  ❞ ❝  some men gain glory after they die, while others fade.  ❞ ❝  even here, behind the darkness of my eyelids, i cannot name the thing i hope for.  ❞ ❝  our joy is so bright we can see nothing else but the other.  ❞ ❝  you have a tender heart. an admirable quality, surely.  ❞ ❝  you are spring, golden and bright. envious death would drink your blood, and grow young again.  ❞ ❝  i will not be the raven on your shoulder all the time, predicting gloom.  ❞ ❝  you look different in sleep, beautiful but cold as moonlight.  ❞ ❝  when there is greed, there is hope.  ❞ ❝  i could have told you more, of the dreams that leave me bleary and bloodshot, the almost-screams that scrape my throat as i swallow them down.  ❞ ❝  you are angry, and not without reason.  ❞ ❝  you feel mislead; you were promised victory.  ❞ ❝  you know, it’s funny; i keep thinking i’ve seen you before.  ❞

SANTIAGO CABRERA as LANCELOT BBC’S Merlin (2008-2012)

“ we’ll see each other again. i believe that. ”