Danshaku

There's a friend I miss a lot. Around a year ago, he told me he "wanted to distance himself from various friends, at least for a while." He was very polite, but thought I would be upset. So he blocked me.

I'm sad I couldn't say goodbye to him. I've thought about him a lot and wondered what it was that I did wrong, or didn't do right. I still don't know. Was I too scary? Insensitive?

I don't know. I wasn't upset with parting ways, I'm just sad that I couldn't wish him well.

I hope this isn't selfish... but on the chance that you're reading this, I just wish you're in a good place, and that you have lasting happiness.

The people we wish we were

Sometimes I wish I was more like Toriel - gentle, patient, friendly, and empathetic. At the same time, I wonder if Toriel wishes she was the person she used to be before tragedy struck.

You're not alone in feeling absolute fear and terror of the future, Ralsei. You'll find that a lot of us are in the same boat.

Oh, where do I begin?

I've been able to draw characters I refused to draw for years, ending a 3-year-long depression and hiatus.

Lost some friends that meant a lot to me. I had a bitter fight with one of them that's weighed on me ever since. The other said they wanted to distance themself from me and some others for unknown reasons. I miss them, but if it's for the best, then so be it.

I came out to my Grandpa. He said some homophobic shit the next day. It was very traumatizing for me. I summoned the courage to stand up to him, and it seems like he's trying to understand.

Made some cool friends in art class, so that's really great!

...

...

I wonder if seeing the world go to shit is just part of growing up. You become more aware of the world, and how messy and fucked up it is. I dunno. I don't think it really matters.