Life's a Peach

my therapist said once "we get good at what we practice, so be careful what you practice" and tbh she was so right for that but also How Dare You??? open my eyes like that???

fucked that you can’t fix other people especially when you really care about them. Oh so im just supposed to be there for you while you suffer. like a useless cunt gargoyle

little miss echolalia would like to repeat what u just said

little miss auditory processing disorder would like you to repeat what you just said

gonna start saying "this is setting men back 10 years" whenever some guy says some dumb shit

"this is really gonna hurt the male community"

you love fat people outside of sexual contexts too, right?

sorry to be a broken record every month but christ menstruation is a stupid concept. oooooh excuse me for not getting pregnant, why the fuck is there goo falling out of me about it? grow the fuck up and reabsorb that shit for nutrients.

Your misbehaving boyfriend is not funny to me

i love writing out numbers and then putting them in parentheses like "one (1)" even when i dont need to i think its funny

being a kid and hearing adults say stuff like "woah 2011 was 4 years ago haha" didn't really convey the fucking horror of a youtube video crossing my recommended labelled "9 years ago" and it's from 2017. that's not true. 9 years ago is 2010 or something. don't lie.

[looking at people younger than me] you have your whole life ahead of you [looking at people older than me] you have your whole life ahead of you [looking at myself] its over

the thing I love most about how tumblr users use tags is that it’s like what if a social media website had a footnotes system

these relationships are always increasing numbers as well. so obviously we need six eleven to mean somethimg

imagine if that's the date it finally happens

atheist quarterback throws a hail darwin

agnostic quarterback throws a hail maybe

christian pitcher throws a christian baby