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and these are everyday conversations we have with customers

    this lady has an iPhone 6s and doesn't know how to work it.

“what is this pop up on my phone?”

“thats a software update ma’am. whens the last time you updated your phone?”

“whats an update?”

we sent her to starbucks for free wifi so she could update.

     this man dropped his phone at a construction site

“hi i dropped my phone and now i cant use it”

“let me take a look at that”. part of the screen is missing and the rest is shattered. “do you have insurance”

“no. thats a waste of money”

“then sir, you’re going to have to go to a repair center and schedule and appointment or we can get you a new phone in store. these are the deals were having on new phones”

“but i want this one. cant you just fix the screen?”

“no sir. youll have to go to a repair center”

“but you sell phones right?”

“yes sir”

“cant you just give me a new one?”

this went on for 15 more minutes before he finally called the care center...they told him the same thing

    dudes hungover

“i uhhhh. i changed my password and i cant remember it”

“were you drunk?”

“yes”

“is your phone backed up to the cloud or on a computer?”

“no. i dont want the government stealing my info!”

“then youll have to go to the apple store. we cant unlock it without a backup here”

“BUT APPLE IS THE GOVERNMENT!”

he has an iphone

You: i woke up with a busted vessel in my eye from rubbing them yesterday. allergies suck

Stranger: Fuuuuuuck man that's not good

You: all the damn trees trying to have sex and shit

Stranger: hey hey, if you water an apple tree with apple juice, technically, arent you feeding it the blood of its children?

You: ........

Stranger: did i go too far

You: are you a psycopath? or do you just use tumblr