goddamn phonies.

    HE’S A BIT TAKEN ABACK TO SAY THE LEAST by the other’s sudden interest. By all accounts , he more or less strikes him as an obvious asshole. But could he really be GENUINE with him right now ?  Masaomi decides to give him the benefit of the doubt. ‘ It’s stupid really. Um. ‘ He pauses & maybe it’s a bit too dramatic of him but it’s hard to tell a stranger something so personal. Although , not really. He goes to Pency too. ‘ Just…I used t’ get bullied a lot. Um. Problems just fittin’ in I guess. I dunno. I wanted t’ dye my hair t’ just…I wanted t’ be different. I wanna fit in. That’s all. ‘ 

        is that a SOB STORY, boy. he’s almost got holden in tears. poor guy. he just wants to FIT IN -- he just wants to fit in with his goddamn blonde hair. boy, there’s nothing more phony than that, if holden’s telling the truth. who wants to fit in with those phonies at pencey, anyway ? what’s it worth ? who wants to fit in with guys who pretend they’ve got nice luggage, or with guys who’ve actually got it and spend all their damn time bragging about it ? not holden. ❛ well, goddamn, ❜ he murmurs, ❛ goddamn. ❜ he even forces a tear. he’s a damn good liar.

        holden gets a big bang out of hats; that’s something he and phoebe have in common. and since he let her have his hunting hat, he decided to buy himself something new. so what he did, he bought himself a goddamn BASEBALL HAT. a baseball hat ! he’s not even a fan of baseball, but that damn hat, boy. he had to have it.

        what he didn’t take into consideration was that hamlet might hit his goddamn head on the rim when he leaned in for a kiss. boy, did holden get a bang out of that. but instead of standing there and laughing at the poor guy, what holden does is he flicks the cap up so that the rip is higher up. that way hamlet won’t hit his goddamn head. 

▐░▒▓ ►► 「  ɴᴏ. 03 ; 」

     THAT’S RIGHT;

               Shinji thought this boy looked familiar. But he still doesn’t have a name to put to the face, and lately, he hasn’t been seeing him as much — if at all, really. He wonders why, but then again, he mostly keeps to himself. There must be several people he hasn’t met.

               ❝ Yeah, ❞ he agrees. Anything interesting he might’ve had to say to continue the conversation dies on the tip of his tongue; he isn’t quite forward enough to say it. ❝ Um…what’s your name, again? ❞

        ❛ i’m bartley o’connor, ❜ holden says with a raise of the brow. fucking bartley. he can’t even think of a more prickish name than bartley. he knows this boy, though. this is shinji ikari -- an exchange student from japan. he doesn’t know a damn thing about him other than that they’re in the same class, but he seems to keep to himself. that’s sort of respectable, holden figures. 

          she is definitely high.   maybe a little drunk, too.    but she still feels she has her head on straight  &  the  bloodshot  color in her eyes isn’t quite prominent yet,    so what’s wrong with friendly conversation?   she doesn’t want to go home yet.        “  doesn’t it? ”    pretending or not,   she’s excited to find someone who  SHARES  her thoughts on it.    “  two whole weeks !     the days started blending together,   but when i finally got out   -   in just the dress & coat i’m wearing now   -   it had been  FOURTEEN DAYS  on the nose.    isn’t it awful ?    can i have some of that? ”    she asks suddenly,   fingers wiggling in the direction of his cigarette.

                     the catchphrase encourages the grin, rather impish for a gesture so innocent. hamlet swallows reactions whole, keeping them among the cage of his ribs to let them settle as reminders to pin - point the ever - changing emotions of mankind. his peers gave him the biggest hoot, especially holden with his goddamns & litany of day to day depressors they were like minds with nothing to lose. these melancholic stretches choked the life out of each of them causing nihilist morals to take root in the barren wasteland of the teenage burnouts, not that it mattered to much to hamlet after all he has been primed for a lifetime of success so failure tasted bittersweet.

                         ‘   what ? cat got your tongue ?  ’

            that subtle moment before where holden shifted his teeth to graze his bottom lip burned as a reminder that not only he was right but, christsake he was a good kisser.

        ❛ no, it just ... ❜ 

        goddamn. that’s all he can think of. usually holden’s got snide remarks aplenty, enough to drive a man MAD. but hamlet’s right -- a cat’s got his tongue and that cat is hamlet himself. christsake did that surprise him, holden knew the boy was FORWARD, but he hadn’t expected THAT in the least.

        but if hamlet had deduced that holden had a crush on him, did that mean that it was requited ? holden figures that it must be, because why else would he have just KISSED him like that ? his chest aches with the prospect of requited love, hell, he’s never experienced it. old sally was too much of a phony and jane, well ... that was something of its own category. but hamlet. goddamn. he clears his throat. he’s shaking. 

        holden’s got to look real goddamn tough with this blood all over his face, but it hurts like hell and he sure doesn’t feel tough. what he’s doing, though, he’s pretending that he was wounded in the war -- he went all the way over to the goddamn war across the ocean and got wounded. and now he’s on the sidewalk just holding his guts in place. he’s a madman, really. 

▐░▒▓ ►► 「  ɴᴏ. 03 ; 」

     SHINJI SIMPLY  NODS

               in reply, and then he realizes: something in the other boy’s face is familiar, too. He has no name to put to it, but he’s definitely seen him on campus — albeit, not often, and certainly not recently. But he asks, to be sure.

               ❝ Um…have we met? You also go, don’t you? ❞

    SEEMED LIKE A RANDOM INQUIRY. Though Masaomi couldn’t really blame someone for wondering. After all , Japanese people aren’t typically born having naturally blond hair & Masaomi is no exception of course. The other’s tone is a bit off putting but he relents anyway. ‘ Mm. No. It isn’t. It — It’s hair dye. My real hair’s brown..Just — It’s a long story.. ’

▐░▒▓ ►► 「  ɴᴏ. 03 ; 」

     THIS TIME, SHINJI HEARS,

               and the edge to the other boy’s demeanor has him shrinking back into his seat across from him on the train. He pauses the song, removing the other earbud from his ear, and looks down and away, staring at the floor.

               ❝ It’s…it’s called ❛ Blue Legend. ❜ ❞ He doesn’t know how popular the artist is overseas.

                     TEARS  spring almost  INSTANTLY  to his eyes at the other’s words.  “  Oh th - this ?  “  He claps a hand to his cheek, biting his lower lip  NERVOUSLY.  “  A lotta people say it looks like a sword, I - I don’t know.  Um  —  that’s probably not what you meant, though.  I - I mean, it’s a tattoo, but that’s  OBVIOUS.  N - not that I thought you asked a stupid question or somethin’ I just  —  I’m sorry !!  “