Do you know what it's like. To search for something your whole life. Make bad decisions, cry at night, cut yourself because you want it so bad. And then you get it. You get happiness. You get 100x better than you ever imagined you found happiness and a future. And you're so in love and happy you can't stop shaking or smiling from how great it is. To finally have something your proud of. To finally be proud of yourself. The. Have it ripped away from you. That night I got those messages. How in love with me you used to be. It's all I ever wanted. To be wanted. For someone to love me. Let alone someone like you the guy of my dreams. Someone who wouldn't leave me like everyone else and wouldn't treat me like an object for their amusement. Do you know what it's like to be given a whole galaxy and then have it ripped away from you. To have your heart shattered. To uncontrollably cry at any point in time just because you can't handle it. So many nights for the past week I've fallen asleep crying because I used to be so in happy and in love I could cry just from that and you used to be too. But now You're not and I'm alone and it's the worst pain I've ever been through and idk how to describe it. Everything I ever wanted. The full names of our children even it was all so perfect. And now I'm stuck with all these amazing memories that just got ripped to shreds. But you're okay. I've always loved everyone more then they love me. And I thought you were different cause when I told you I loved you more you disagreed. But I guess I was right.

I miss you, I miss hanging out at your pool, I miss kicking your ass at pool, skeeball, air hockey, I miss the mini van and fishing all the bullshit we got into, trynna sneak you around with the tracker app, I miss you being there for me when I need help or when I got kicked outta my house, I miss you