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‘You work for Netflix, did you get free Netflix?’ [x]

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unclefather

*giggles at the internet*

my mom: what are you laughing about?

me: worry about yourself

amusementforme

youcakelessfuck

lisafrankocean

this is still my favorite tweet of all time

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blackorchidd

there is two types of tired, I suppose one is a dire need of sleep the other is a dire need of peace

Mandeq Ahmed (via carteir)

yotoob

We’ve bought a new house. And our new next door neighbours (two delightful gentlemen) will not stop being nice.

- bought us a seagull proof refuse bag (yes, they are actual things)

- loaned us garden tools when we didn’t have any

- invited us around for Friday night drinks so we could meet the other people on the lane

- one of them brought me a bunch of sweetpea flowers that he’d picked from his garden

- and tomorrow he’s coming to cut our hedge for us with his electric hedge trimmer thing idk, and all I have to do is hold the ladder.

Basically, I am UNSETTLED and am now having to enter into an arms race of niceness and I am already so behind oh god.

Long story short - I just baked a lemon drizzle cake, and it looks great but I can’t even eat it because MR AND MR NICE MUST RECEIVE AN OFFERING.

yotoob

ABSOLUTE CRISIS I GAVE THEM THE LEMON DRIZZLE AND THEN THEY INVITED ME IN TO HAVE A SLICE AND A COFFEE WITH THEM AND GAVE ME A TOUR OF THEIR HOUSE AND LET ME HOLD THEIR PUPPY. AND THEN THEY CAME AROUND TO HELP ME BAG UP THE HEDGE CLIPPINGS. THESE MEN ARE NICENESS PROS AND I CANNOT WIN.

yotoob

HELP WE HAD AN HOUR LONG POWER CUT ON THE STREET AND IN THAT TIME THE OTHER MR NICE CAME AROUND WITH MATCHES AND CANDLES ‘JUST IN CASE YOU DIDN’T HAVE ANY’. IT WAS BARELY DARK.

BASTARDS - I’M GOING TO HAVE TO HOST A DINNER PARTY AREN’T I?

fanaticalqueergeek

The Gay Agenda, everyone.

duskenpath

this is fucking i n c r e d i b l e

when ur not out to ur parents

parents: how was ur day honey

me: oh man so heterosexual, just... just the straightest

the-perks-of-being-black

jercat-deactivated20150616

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digitaleyestrain

islandgyalll

Person: how are you?

Me: i'm ok

Person: why just ok?

Message appears: you are not an experienced enough friend to unlock this response yet. try again after reaching friendship level 10.

halseycon

dovemother

low key wanna die. high key know it’ll get better and that I’ll be okay but still low key wanna die

•18+ Adults Only

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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions

Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming

thisblogisdeletedbye-deactivate

Real Friends // Anchor Down

(Please don’t delete my credit)

virgo-ish

undressing in front of an open window because I love giving back to the community

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