REHOMED STRAY

sherlock holmes deduces you are trans before you've figured it out yourself and refers to you with those pronouns and then when you look confused is like "ah...had you not arrived at that conclusion yet?" and wafts away in his dressing gown to smoke seventeen pipes, leaving you in a gender crisis

Hercule Poirot deduces you are trans by accident because he suspected you of murder and broke into your house and searched your stuff then puts 2 and 2 together when Hastings makes an innocuous observation about your fashion sense or something and he jumps up and cries “mon dieu!!!” before striding over to you kissing you on both cheeks and saying “ah, cher ami, you must live as you choose!” and then running off to confront the real culprit while you stand there in befuddlement

Columbo deduces you're trans from context clues while he's talking to you about the area, immediately uses your preferred pronouns and starts telling you about his cousin, who's also transgender, and how they got this job doing security, and how they told him that a security guard always locks up, and asks you if the guard locked up last night, and isn't it weird the place was open? And you're like, well, someone else must have opened it up. Maybe the guy in charge? He has a spare key. And then he nods and goes "the guy in charge has a spare key... well, how about that?" And then he offers you a cigar and wanders off, and a day later your boss gets arrested for murder.

Fanon Batman deduces you are trans and suddenly a free hormone clinic opens up by your home a couple months later

Miss Fisher learns youre trans and simply gives you hormones, and a little cocaine as a treat. she also invites you out to a club to meet like minded individuals. at the club you watch as she seduces the bartender and then the next day the bartender is arrested for the murder.

you ever think about how every single person in the detarune fandom who wants to misgender kris due to being a shithead opts for he/him. makes you think sometimes

here's a video game. you get to play as the world's most TMA dog

cuntgirl robot made to be a sperm bank. shes just made to masturbate with and store cum but for some reason they programmed her to have thoughts and feelings too. but please. don't worry about any of that. she sees that as more of a bonus feature too n_n

nice mechanical watches are wasted on wealthy men. a billionaire who will wear it once every four years and leave it in a case the rest of the time doesnt deserve a marvel of engineering like that. *i* deserve a watch like that because i get sexually aroused by clockwork

jokes on you, i have a mechanical watch with transparent windows, which means i can see it ticking, and it (the watch) is just as sexy as you think

you really are out of your league here on all counts. look up the vianney halter deep space resonance and understand my suffering

so ive been meaning to do this poll for a while because my hypothesis is that seattle is the most Tumblr city, likely in the entire world. tumblr has a huge american majority userbase obviously, but just for comparison going forward, only 0.22% of the american population lives in seattle. as of this reblog, this poll is showing 4% of respondents are seattleites. given, this isnt scientific at all, because my blog just has a lot of seattle connections and seattle followers, but it's still an impressive bias

we desperately need sex 2

i just know someone's going to mention kink. girl that's still sex 1. we had to invent BDSM cause we didn't have sex 2. tis but a pale reflection. but it's coming

kink reaches mayyybe like sex 1.3 if it hits just right

when sex 2 comes out what sorts of quality of life updates will be included to help draw in people who never really got into sex 1

more pleasurable. more intellectually stimulating. higher skill ceiling. more dynamic metagame. optionally more mental-emotional alignment between parties. less cleanup. more intuitive. more variety in sensation and activity to match diverse sensory tendencies. smoother integration with parties' coupled emotional processing. and so on

Fishing minigame.

Fishing minigame

I’m so glad this is on tumblr

My favourite thing about this is, he didn’t even have to call him ‘Captain’ he could have used the screen-name but he was SO MARRIED TO THE IMMERSION that he DID.

my fav.

Fun fact, the developers of this game loved this video so much that they made it an official advertisement of the game