You have bewitched me body and soul

if i was a vampire i'd make a living (lol) settling petty property disputes. there's drama between maureen (52) and her brother lester (58) that erupted when their dear mother passed away and left a will that seems kind of dodgy. now lester has always been kind of a loser and maureen a dedicated daughter, but this weird new will maureen's never seen before is saying that lester gets the house? maureen smells a rat so she calls in the bat (this is my tagline by the way) (it's very clever) and i show up to settle things. maureen tells me i may enter her property, lester tells me i can't, and i walk right through that front door. pack your bags boy.

They should block chatgpt on uni WiFi the way they used to block coolmathgames

they should make chatgpt automatically redirect to coolmathgames so you can actually fucking learn something

i like when you see a little lizard go skittleskittleskitter and then stop & do some push ups

fanservice sucks bc it’s never you that’s being serviced it’s always some other really annoying fan

if i made a video game where you get to pick the gender of the player character i'd make both the options be nonbinary and you can either have they/them or it/its pronouns. those are your only options

I love the word "beeline." youre in such a hurry youre doing bug movement

in chess the queens can kill each other which is toxic yuri and the kings can never get within a square of each other which is doomed yaoi

oh boy! something in my mailbox from the IRA? I wonder what it could be!

"i ate too many cookies" is truly an ageless problem. an unlearnable lesson.

stop calling it a girl dinner and call it by its formal name: Fend For Yourself dinner in an ingredients household

i do think the negative interpretations of "im probably nonbinary but i have a job right now" are kind of reaching. it's obviously a waste of time to theorize the op's intended meaning, so instead i think it's better to recognize how the phrase can be a useful framing device to criticize how much of a fucking hassle it is to get gendered correctly. "but i have a job" e.g. will face discrimination that could threaten livelihood; e.g. don't have the mental bandwidth to explain gender to others; e.g. don't have the time and energy for the soul-searching necessary to confirm. all three of these are labor issues. yes you could interpret it as "but being nonbinary isn't important enough to worry about", despite that being a blatantly bad-faith read. it's more useful to interpret it as "but being publicly nonbinary requires a lot of social effort that, in many cultural contexts, will create more problems that you can't afford to deal with". like cmon it's a really good jumping off point for productive conversations about queer labor rights

sorry to everyone out there who thinks they have the funniest tshirt but i think i can confidently say i just saw the actual funniest tshirt just now. i passed by a beautiful black woman with long multicolor braids blowing majestically in the beach breeze & she was wearing an oversized tshirt that said in gigantic letters "WHITE BOY OF THE YEAR"