Cuddle Sharks

french people when they were coming up with the French language

so. how does anyone ever have the time or energy

Executive function Georg, who lives in a cave and accomplishes 10,000 tasks per day, is an outlier adn should not be counted. 

How does he have time between eating spiders?

The task is eating spiders

This is the quality content I come to Tumblr to see.

number station

Me, Catholic, walking into a Protestant church with no depictions of Mary: where’s my mom

Me, culturally Protestant, walking into a Catholic church filled balls to the walls with paintings sculptures candles and god knows what else: why’s there so much stuff

Me, Orthodox, walking into a western church:  w h e r e   a r e   t h e   b o n e s

Me, vampire, walking into any denominational holy place: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Me, a janitor, sweeping up the vampires ashes: where the fUCk did all this dirt come from

My coworker just completely killed me by casually throwing "you can lead a horse to water but if you drown it you have to walk back" into the conversation

Why are catholics picking fights with people they obviously know won't respect them