Lethal Glamour

Sure.

Red means stop. No more negotiation, something has crossed a line (too painful, something bad that wasn’t negotiated, etc.)

Yellow means that you need a break or that something is too much, or that if the top continues then you’re going to “red” soon.

Green means that things are going well and you want to continue if not ramp it up a little.

While a bottom might blurt out red or yellow, I’ve never seen a bottom volunteer “green”. It’s usually said in answer to when a top is checking in to make sure everything is okay. Asking “How are you?” and getting an answer of “fine” or “okay” might mean the bottom is just on autopilot and reflexively answering. Asking “What’s your color?” and getting “green” or “I was very close to yellow when you stopped” is much better.

One of my favorite doms to watch at parties was doing a pre-scene negotiation with someone he hadn’t played with before and said something like “Now, just between you and me here ;-) , my favorite color is yellow. It’s not about taking anything I can dish out. I promise you, I can always go harder. I want to know how you’re doing. I’ll likely yellow you, on purpose, a few times, just to find out where your limits are and then aim for a little below that. I don’t want to hear ‘green green green, green green red’ because then the scene’s over. I want some indication of how you’re doing and when you’re getting close to what you can handle, okay?”

Are you a sub/bottom that has issues kneeling because of the pressure created by sitting on your feet/ankles?

I thought I'd drop some techniques I like to use when I'm self-tying or tying another human with thin/crepe skin

What is crepe skin?

"Crepey skin is thin and looks finely wrinkled like crepe paper. It may also sag or feel loose. While crepey skin is similar to common wrinkles in many ways, the condition tends to impact larger areas, and this skin feels noticeably more fragile and thin..."

What causes crepe skin?

Lots of things included but not limited to: sun damage, aging, rapid weight loss or gain, certain genetic disorders, smoking, alcohol use, and dehydration

How is crepe skin different than non-crepe skin?

It is thinner, less elastic, and more prone to bruise, rip, and damage when under stress, pressure, injury

How do I as a rope top account for my own or another's crepe skin in rope bondage?

I recommend wearing comfortable, form-fitting clothes over the areas of the body I might be tying that have creping. I almost always wear leggings and a camisole or bodysuit when I'm tying myself for practice and development - tying directly over slack skin, especially as a beginner, can be a very tricky and painful experience - I recommend practicing over clothing and then moving to implement your practice onto your exposed flesh if you choose

Speaking on tender flesh: Running your fingers underneath a rope line which is wrapping crepe skin can be a pretty miserable and pinchy affair as the flesh has a tendency to stay with your finger as you move to clear the lines, and can easily find itself pinched between the ropes and your finger 🥲

Instead of running my finger under my rope, I gently pull the skin away from any areas where it has become nipped or grabbed up in the rope - a similar technique is useful when working with adipose tissue

Stay well-hydrated if possible - keep your skin clean, exfoliated and moisturized. I find happy skin plays best with rope, and my skin is happiest these days when I'm hydrated, dry-rubbed, and well-oiled 😌

I understand that the risk for side effects like bruising, rope marks, rope burns, etc.. is higher in crepe regions than in skin that is more elastic and collagen-rich. I can use what I find to be best practices to minimize risks, but I acknowledge that the base line for the skin's vulnerability to dermal injury is higher to begin with

If you have any questions you think I can answer or any tips for working with thin skin and rope you'd like to share, please lmk!

also. adapt your kink spaces to fit your needs. use a yoga chaise for riding and doggystyle to help with pain or holding oneself up, if your shoulders dislocate like mine, cuff your hands in front instead of the back, have a partner that knows what to do and to stop if you fall unconscious, seize, or are in pain, and most importantly, speak up, take breaks.