Courtesy Call

getting high on hrothgar and throating the world

this life does not hold your hand

the only thing i remember from last nights dream is that Wendy Williams had a new lemon-like soda, like 7-up or sprite with the same exact iconography (white bulky lettering, green color scheme) called “Susan” and the catchphrase for it was “When you’re feeling too repugnant to say hello”

the eyes of someone who just vomited carry a vulnerable acceptance to grief only known in portraits of saints

i think everyone owes a debt of gratitude to jimmy eat world for the middle. you ARE in the middle of the ride. and everything WILL be just fine. and you SHOULD live right now and be yourself. and it DOESN'T matter if it's good enough for someone else. thank you jimmy eat world

*walks into my apartment to find hundreds of sock puppets sobbing their eyes out at a funeral they apparently decided to hold in my living room*

my shirt that says “not a danger to myself and others” getting me asked a lot of questions already answered by my shirt

flirting: omggg haha that amulet is so neat! Do you mind if I hold it?

Give me the fucking amulet

tf2 themed drag queen named Anita Dispenser

As a voter my primary concern is toys coming to life and being evil when they come to life because they want revenge for being played with too much / too hard. My secondary concern is illegal immigrants. My third concern is that the toys who come to life and are good won't be strong enough to stop the evil toys. My fifth concern is the economy. I can't tell you four because it's a decretttt.

minecraft.........