Crazy Kids

send a number for a drabble/starter. they are sorted into categories ;

 CATEGORY ONE; general

‘i can’t sleep’ sex

‘make up’ sex

‘break up’ sex

‘revenge’ sex

‘rebound’ sex

‘i’m bored’ sex

‘curiosity’ sex

‘first time’ sex

‘homecoming/prom night’ sex

‘hotel room’ sex

‘distraction’ sex

‘the condoms are about to expire’ sex

‘anniversary’ sex

‘snuck out of the house to hook-up’ sex

‘post-argument’ sex

‘we’re drunk and horny’ sex

‘comfort’ sex

‘walked in on while naked’ sex

‘to change the subject’ sex

CATEGORY TWO; risky/kinky/strangers

‘i need a place to crash’ sex

‘your friend just told you about a new position’ sex

‘the elevator broke down’ sex

‘end of the world/the world is in chaos’ sex

‘i can’t believe we survived’ sex

‘i caught you masturbating’ sex

‘you caught me masturbating’ sex

‘crotchless underwear is a thing’ sex

‘i’m/your pregnant and horny’ sex

‘we’re in a public place and i just spent the last half hour making you ridiculously aroused’ sex

‘you’re my teacher and i finally seduced you’ sex

‘i’m your teacher and i can’t believe your my student’ sex

‘best friend’s younger sibling who suddenly got hot’ sex

‘i saw a cool scene in a porno and i want to reenact it’ sex

CATEGORY THREE; cheating/assumed cheating

‘everyone thinks we’re banging, so we might as well just do it’ sex

‘we’ve been friends-with-benefits for a long time, and now that one of us is in a relationship, are we going to stop?’ sex

‘randomly hooked up one night and the next monday you walk into my work and i discover that my favourite colleague is actually your husband/wife’ sex

‘one or both of us is in a relationship, but we can’t help it’ sex

‘we’ve both been cheated on by our respective partners, so fuck it’ sex

CATEGORY FOUR; established relationships

‘we just got engaged’ sex

‘i thought you were dead, but you’re not and i can’t believe it’ sex

‘we were childhood sweethearts, and we haven’t seen each other in years’ sex

‘i need to lose my virginity and you’re the only person i want to lose it to’ sex

‘you just walked into my office for a job as my secretary/assistant and we haven’t seen each other in years, but sexual tension is a thing’ sex

‘our families hate each other for (insert reason here) but that doesn’t matter to us’ sex

‘we’re in a dysfunctional, toxic relationship but i still love you more than anything in this world’ sex

CATEGORY FIVE; lgbti+

‘my girlfriend left me with blue balls, and you’re her brother and i’m pretty sure i’m not gay but lets go for it’ sex

‘we pretended to be lesbian lovers to get a creepy guy to stop hitting on us, so we kissed to complete the charade and we both kind of liked it, so…?’ sex

‘you’re my room mate and you’re really hot, but we’re both guys/girls and this is new to me’ sex

‘i’m gay and you’re curious and you asked me to show you what it’s like’ sex

“Who wouldn’t be angry you ate all of my cereal and faked your death for three years!”

“I’m going to need you to put on some underwear before you say anything else.“ 

“Quick catch that cat it stole my wallet!”

“Fuck I feel like I got hit by a car… Wait I did? And it was your car?”

“The skirt is short on purpose.”

“I can’t believe I’m sitting in space jail with you of all people.”

“So why did I have to punch that guy?”

“I may have accidentally sort of adopted five cats.”

“I hope you know that my name is actually ________.”

“Please stop petting the test subjects. ”

“That is the tenth demon summoning this week holy shit.”

“Please put me down it’s just a sprained ankle" 

“So what if I broke my arm I’m still doing it.”

“Why exactly do you need chloroform at 2AM?”

“I’m like 75% this won’t explode on us.”

“You need to stop leaving dead bodies in my kitchen.”

“I understand the whole sleep talking thing but what I don’t understand is the princess dragon dream and why I’m in it.”

“So…this is your place?”

“This is your room.”

“I’m not sleeping with you?”

“I’m not sleeping with you!”

“Well…I…uhh…I figured you wouldn’t want to sleep in the same bed just yet.”

“Do I have to change my name?”

“You don’t have to change your name.”

“I like your mom.”

“So your mom’s a real bitch.”

“I like your dad.”

“So your dad’s a real dick.”

“You live here alone?”

“Who else lives with you?”

“I’m a little nervous.”

“You don’t have to be nervous.”

“Do you know how to cook?”

“I’m your wife.”

“I’m your husband.”

“You live like a pig.”

“Uh…not you.”

“I’m glad it’s you.”

“You’re paying for the wedding.”

“I’m paying for the wedding.”

“My parents are paying for the wedding.”

“Your parents are paying for the wedding.”

“I like you.”

“I don’t like you.”

“I love you.”

Send ‘✩’ for the following:

Disagreements:

Who is more likely to raise their voice? Who threatens to leave but never actually does? Who actually keeps their word and leaves? Who trashes the house? Do either of them get physical? How often do they argue/disagree? Who is the first to apologise?

Sex:

Who is on top? Who is on the bottom? Who has the strangest desires? Any kinks? Who’s dominant in bed? Is head ever in the equation? If so, who is better at performing it? Ever had sex in public? Who moans the most? Who leaves the most marks? Who screams the loudest? Who is the more experienced of the two? Do they ‘fuck’ or ‘make love’? Rough or soft? How long do they usually last? Is protection used? Does it ever get boring? Where is the strangest place they’d have sex? 

Family:

Do your muses plan on having children/or have children? If so, how many children do your muses want/have? Who is the favorite parent? Who is the authoritative parent? Who is more likely to allow the children to have a day off school? Who lets the children indulge in sweets and junk food when the other isn’t around? Who turns up to extra curricular activities to support their children? Who goes to parent teacher interviews? Who changes the diapers? Who gets up in the middle of the night to feed the baby? Who spends the most time with the children? Who packs their lunch boxes? Who gives their children ‘the talk’? Who cleans up after the kids? Who worries the most? Who are the children more likely to learn their first swear word from?

Affection:

Who likes to cuddle? Who is the little spoon? Who gets naughty in the most inappropriate of places? Who struggles to keep their hands to themself?   How long can they cuddle until one becomes uncomfortable? Who gives the most kisses? What is their favourite non-sexual activity? Where is their favourite place to cuddle? Who is more likely to playfully grope the other?  How often do they get time to themselves?

Sleeping:

Who snores? If both do, who snores the loudest? Do they share a bed or sleep separately? If they sleep together, do they cozy up together or lay far apart? Who talks in their sleep? What do they wear to bed? Are either of your muses insomniacs? Can sleeping pills be found by the bedside? Do they wrap their limbs around each other or just lay side by side? Who wakes up with bed hair? Who wakes up first? Who prepares breakfast in bed for the other? What is their favourite sleeping position? Who hogs the sheets? Do they set an alarm each night? Can a television be found in their bedroom? Who has nightmares? Who has ridiculous dreams? Who sprawls out and takes up most of the bed?  Who makes the bed?  What time is bed time?  Any routines/rituals before bed? Who’s the grumpiest when they wake up? 

Work:

Who is the busiest? Who rakes in the highest income? Are any of your muses unemployed? Who takes the most sick days? Who is more likely to turn up late to work? Who sucks up to their boss? What are their jobs? Who stresses the most? Do your muses enjoy or despise their careers/occupations? Are your muses financially stable? 

Home:

Who does the washing? Who takes out the trash? Who does the ironing? Who does the cooking? Who is more likely to burn the house down just trying? Who is messier?  Who leaves the toilet roll empty? Who leaves their dirty clothes on the floor? Who forgets to flush the toilet? Who is the prankster around the house? Who loses the car keys when it comes time to go somewhere? Who mows the lawn? Who answers the telephone? Who does the vacuuming? Who does the groceries? Who takes the longest to shower? Who spends the most time in the bathroom?

Miscellaneous: