Autism be damned

forever grateful i was simply too lazy to let the makeup industrial complex get its hooks in me. I was just like im not doing all of that. in fact. im doing none of that

yeah I have political reasons for it now but my original and still most powerful reason is "I am not getting out of this bed one single second before I have to"

drake?

josh?

where’s the body of christ?

In fifth grade a boy tried to impress me by swallowing a whole tadpole live and I punched him so hard that he puked and the tadpole was fine.

This is funnier than anything I have ever said.

This post is to Easter what a Geiger counter is to radiation.

I see it’s *looks at smudged writing on hand* Lent again.

World Heritage Post

not putting my whole pussy into it today lads. you're getting my left labia at best

tumblrs new policy allows porn but only if it's on your dashboard specifically while u are scrolling at a work meeting and ur boss is sitting behind u