BRAINLESS SENTIMENTALITY

There was snort… Really? People wanted him to be soft? He honestly could never it happening considering how sharp the edges were and how broken everything was.

Plus what’s the point? If anything;  the other couldn’t afford to be soft if he wanted achieve his goal.

“Alright then and it’s nothing. If any more questions does come to mind then you can always ask later.” He looked at the plate that was empty now as he took his last bite.

“Even after you left this universe although I will warn that sometimes I won’t be in area as I do travel from here to another place often.”

     “Mhm” he understands, he’s the same way, ever wandering. “I appreciate it, I shall certainly come to see you again, this has been...Cathartic, for me.”

Talking with other iterations of himself has proved to be interesting, and soothing in a way, they’ve been the only ones who he really felt understood his point of view, is that sad, or reasonable?

“You’ve been...Very kind” he explains. “I’m sure we will meet again, or, I would certainly like to” a small nod.

“Oh you totally missed out on a chance to con people~“ As if he would, but it was amusing to see Akechi act as if he couldn’t play pool only to crush those stupid enough to fall for it. “It’s like that nature vs nurture conversation.” She spoke as she dumped the bits into a pot. “I wonder if there would be a difference in those who’ve danced from there infancy to those who learned later in life-but what did you try?“

     “Oh goodness, I’m no con man I’m afraid, I would simply feel too guilty.” as if, even now he’s playing a con, tricking Makoto into thinking he’s from this world, tricking her into thinking he’s mild mannered and kind. Akechi’s whole life is one big con.

He doesn’t feel badly for it, he just isn’t the type of person, but being here with Makoto really puts into perspective how much easier things might have been if he had simply been not-him.

“Almost assuredly, children have more neuroplasticity, it’s why it’s easier to become multilingual the earlier you begin” he explains, and then, the question, his fingers twitch, and he looks sheepish, genuinely so, it is not an act.

“Wow everyone hates him? I wonder who else could possibly know what that’s like. It’s such a rare and sad happenstance.“ Goro couldn’t lay it on thicker if he tried. “He’s not entitled to anything from you, of course and if you’re the true reason as to why he’s suffering then, he should continue to do so.“ It’s what Reau deserved of course for making a decision that wasn’t his to make. The only difference now of course would be that they would die together. “Such a waste of time.“

     “Oh goodness imagine” he rolls his eyes. That said, he’s curious about some things, he would like to know whether everything will disappear when Reau dies, it’s become a complex situation.

“That said, I believe he shall continue to do so, sometimes Karma does step in” he feels a little reassured now though, a little justified.

“It makes sense only in a series of events but in terms of it being fair or just. You were shot, you died but that doesn’t override everyone’s instinct to cling to life. You being ok with it is admirable.“ He hummed. “How is he suffering if it’s supposed to be an ideal reality? I suppose it would be due to him avoiding probation in the first place?“

     “I suppose. I simply want my fate to be mine, that’s all.” admirable, he wasn’t so sure anything he had done was admirable. He was not an admirable person.

“Reau suffers because he loves me, and I am cruel to him, and because I am suffering, he desires me to be happy and I am not. He is miserable because I loathe him and--” his eyes avert. as if debating what info to give and what to keep.

@risoriaprince​

"Pardon me, but I couldn't help but notice how similar we look." And then a bit more jokingly, "Are you a twin I never knew I had?"

     He looks his double over idly. Yes, they do look very similar, but that is the point, is it not? A cock of the head is the initial and soundless reply, followed by a small nod. “No, I’m afraid I’m an only child, and I assume you are as well.” 

His current outfit is short sleeved for the summer heat, a simple blouse with a simple silk bow around the collar, a pretty wine-red that matches his eyes. Black jeans. It’s surprisingly not over the top for Reau’s usual choice in things to put him in. But the sun wins out over extravagant style every time.

     “I merely wandered here from another world using the metaverse” he has to assume another iteration of him knows what that is, if not, well, it isn’t his job to baby them, though he’d likely explain just to give them the information, he finds he often gets along best with other versions of his own existence, not because of any sort of narcissism, they just often have an understanding born of similar lives.

“But why do you have to die is my question? I don’t mean to impose any standards on you and I understand your want and need to be yourself until your last breath but, it seems….Forced? It seems like you can’t let yourself be happy and….I like to think one of your desires would be to live, is all.“ He sighs in turn, waving off the apology that isn’t needed. “My softness is a weakness and I know that but, I can equally appreciate your jagged edges all the same. I’m sure they’ve benefited you.“ Something is nagging at the back of Goro’s mind however. “What if that takes longer than you thought? That battle with Akira? Don’t you think you’re doing everyone a disservice by not just getting it over with?”

     “I’m not suicidal, if that’s your worry” he wants to get that out of the way immediately. “But I lost the game, and I took that loss with grace. If I had been returned to life on accident or by happenstance, it would bother me little to none” how can he possibly explain when he does not know how to make someone know his heart?

His hand moves upwards, tangling in the fabric of the hoodie over his heart, it almost seems an anxious motion. Maybe it is.

     “...I’m sorry, I’m, not sure I know how to explain”

His throat feels suddenly tight, just for a moment, as he tries to find a way to explain why it is he should be dead, and he’s glad for a new question.

“Because Akira is not always Akira.” he explains, “There is...a difference, between who he is now and who he was, sometimes, just for a moment, he returns to being the man I love” his hand moves from chest up to push his own hair back.

“Darts, no. Billiards, yes.“ She chuckles softly. “I’m not that good at it I’m afraid, I keep managing to hit people with the pool cue.“ Makoto was more clumsy than she liked to admit. “But, how good would you say you’re good at them?“ She asked, the kitchen becoming filled with the sound of crunches from her chopping up veggies.

     “We could play sometime if you’re like, I would be happy to teach you darts, and to have a non stranger to play billiards against” besides, he sort of likes the idea of her showing up everyone at either of those games should the group go there as his own group often had. Oh yes, actually, the idea is priceless, how funny would it be if she bulldozed Akira.

“Oh, I like to think I’m passable at both. But I’ve had time to practice” He is excellent at both, decidedly so, enough so that even playing with his off hand, he was still more than a match for almost everyone he’d played against, but she didn’t need to know that.

“I don’t exactly blame you considering your situation.” He didn’t envy the other considering he was chained down by the dream in his world, a dream which he didn’t have any say, whilst he was free to do what he wanted with the hardship of life.

The mere idea of being shackled makes him sick.

“You’re welcome.” A sincere smile came to his face; he knew the cafe was a perfect place for a good meal and a quiet spot.

“I’m glad that you enjoy the food here… Either way, I do look forward when the day comes and you do rights things in your world.” He tapped his finger on the table. And I hope not… Regardless, do you have any other questions that you want to ask?”

     “That’s a refreshing thing to hear” he admits, “Most simply tell me to be softer” he scoffs softly, it will never happen. He does not know how to be soft any longer, he does not think, not the way people want. He is inherently broken. It is what it is.

It’s almost too kind, that basic ‘I don’t blame you’, for a moment he’s genuinely unsure of what to do, it’s like he simply does not know how to process kindness without ulterior motive. 

“I...”

His eyes fall briefly to the table as if to reset his voice before they return to the other man.