✨️Sappy_crap✨️

He's close to getting his goal met.

ilya does engraving style and black work and is loyal to the coil. he has about 300 machines all custom built. when he moved to the US he worked only in trad shops and is always saying shit like dip and rip

ilyas wardrobe is exclusively tshirts from shops he’s guested. he has a crazy collection of tattoos, basically style you can think of, from american traditional to trash polka (it was an era) and you KNOW a bunch of shitty drunk stick n pokes from svetlana

shane does micro realism and refuses to use anything other than a battery powered pen rotary bc the shop is always loud as fuck anyway and he doesn’t need any more overstimulation thank you very much. he’d work at an appointment only shop, that looks like a doctors office, but has lots of plants and good natural light

shane would have a full japanese body suit that he went to japan to get because he never does anything by halves and you would literally never know it because he’s always wearing a black hoodie and jeans. no one at the shop has literally ever seen him in a tshirt (they keep it FROSTY in there)

shane has no hand tatts but gets ilyas initials tattooed on the inside of his ring finger after they get married

(ilya is mildly concerned when he finds out because they’re millionaires and can afford the best stylists the country can offer)

Au where everything is the same but Shane can shift into a bunny and it somehow fixes Vegas

or "Ilya and his struggles with the cookbooks"

...

~ 2011

Ilya: Ok I don't want to be rude, please, don't hit me.

Shane: ???

Ilya: What kind of Asian are you?

Shane: Whoa. (clearly not amused)

Ilya: I mean you low-key look Bashkir passing, but you don't speak Russian, so I am at a loss.

Shane: Well if you have to know, I am half Japanese.

Ilya: Oh. (slightly disappointed) Ok, forget it.

Shane: Care to clarify? (even less amused)

Ilya: (almost sheepish) Well I live alone, I have to cook for myself, so I am looking for a decent plov recipe, and I kinda hoped maybe your mom has one. I guess not.

Shane: (torn between annoyed and thinking something along the lines of "adorable") What is plov?

Ilya: THE FOOD OF THE GODS HOLLANDER! (a little defeated) Gotta buy some cookbooks I guess...

September 2017, Boston, Ilya's place, a dozen of cookbooks later

Shane: ...what's the smell?

Ilya: (takes the lid off kazan) Behold! The plov!

Shane: ... it's rice and meat.

Ilya: Try it.

Shane: ... (tries it)

Shane: (starts eating it directly from kazan with a big spoon) What the fuck is this?!

Ilya: (smiling like a fucking devil)

Shane: (never stops chewing) Marry me!

(Shane had indigestion that night, but no regrets)

Some more years (and cookbooks) later

Sveta: Is he... Is he eating syrniki?

Ilya: Yep.

Sveta: You've officially russified your husband.

Ilya: That's nothing, last week I made ravioli instead of pelmeni, and he literally cried. "But Ilyusha, pelmeni". Hilarious. Adorable. Never loved him more.

Sveta: It explains how he got all that extra muscle mass in the last 3 years.

Ilya: I know right. His mom is pissed though. Gyoza not good enough for baby Shane, but somehow pelmeni is fine. Ah, the power of love.

Shane: She just never told you why. When I was six, mom got distracted and put sugar instead of salt into the filling. I finished the plate but couldn't look at gyoza ever since.

Ilya: Oh baby. Do you want another helping?

More than yesterday and less than tomorrow