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PRIDE CELEBRATION 2023: FAVORITE COUPLES

@pscentral event 16: pride colours

PRIDE CELEBRATION 2023: FAVORITE COUPLES

Toni: Why?

Shelby is kind, people-pleasing, judgmental and caring. Shelby always tries her best to live up to the expectations, leading to her feeling like she can’t really be herself. 

At her best, Shelby becomes more comfortable with herself while on the island, as we see in her opening up to Toni. She becomes more aware of her own feelings and her needs.

At her worst, Shelby has a tendency to blame other people for her actions, especially when she feels she has done something wrong. She can also be really hard on herself as we see when she isolates herself from the group.

Shelby has always felt like she had to act a certain way due to her upbringing. This has made her feel like she can’t be herself, and represses certain parts of herself like her sexuality. I think this is also shown in her participation in beauty pageants. I feel like Shelby is a bit obsessed with her looks as she has always been valued for her beauty. This is one of the reasons that she is so embarrassed about her dentures.   

Shelby is a typical people-pleaser who wants everyone to like her. When we first see her on the plane, Shelby is the one who tries to break the ice and is always trying to make people feel at ease. She also tries to be helpful on the island and doesn’t really instigate any kind of conflict. 2s are usually very social which we see with Shelby as she constantly suggests to do icebreakers and play games to connect with them. 

However, I feel like this takes a toll on Shelby and she wishes she could be less of a people pleaser. I feel like one of the things she likes about Toni is that she seems authentic to herself and isn’t afraid of upsetting people. Shelby basically tells Toni that she envies that she is free from expectations and can be herself. Whereas Shelby has always felt like she had to conform to the expectations of her family.

Shelby reacts very badly when she feels like she has done the wrong thing or has upset the people she loves. For example, after she kisses Becca, she lashes out at her and makes vicious comments. Before this, Shelby was a really supportive friend and continued her friendship with Becca despite everyone else alienating her. So, when she lashed out at Becca and cut off contact, she felt responsible for her death. This is also one of the reasons she fights so hard to give Toni the pill and save her, because she feels guilty about Becca’s death.

Shelby shows her wing 1 as she is very concerned with her own moral code and is perfectionistic. 

Tri-type: 2w1 - 1w2 - 6w7 

Some quotes to describe Shelby’s motivations

“Isn’t that what we’re all afraid of? That we won’t be loved? That we’ll be all alone?”

“Three words. Shelter building contest.”

“I don’t do anger.”

“I know exactly who I am. I cannot wait to get home and get back to her.”

Shelby: “This one time, we were on a mission trip to Mexico, and we were watching the sunset together. And because the light was just right, the sun made this beautiful green flash just before it sunk below the horizon. And I was like…”Isn’t that just the purest thing you ever saw?” You ever seen that? Green flash at sunset?

“What do you want?”

“I’m sorry Rachel, that was so incredibly thoughtless of me.”

That entire rant really put into perspective how self-aware, and aware of other’s emotions/feelings Shelby is.

Not to say that’s even necessarily a good thing. In cases like this, for example - we see how Shelby’s able to project her guilt for wanting to stay on the island while everyone else is suffering. She beats herself up for the idle statement alluding to that fact so much she’s able to obscure her true feelings, and perform the desired reaction she knows the others would want to see - i.e. not being so ignorant as to push past everyone’s suffering for the sake of her optimism about her experiences on the island. And that means she can keep on doing her thing, keep holding onto her true feelings, behind a convincing enough facade that no one can break through. Which isn’t really anything except self-destructive - maybe something she’d want to open up w/ her kinda-girlfriend & stuff - until she starts doing shit like, not signalling the rescue boat and shit lmao.

Fatin: mom friend. Gives great advice and makes sure everyone is doing good

Shelby: fun Aunt friend. Thinks she’s a mom friend but causes too much drama to actually be a mom friend.

Toni: uncle friend. Shows up to all events yet only speaks like three words but will fight for you if need be

Leah: unhinged eldest daughter that keeps getting into trouble

Rachel and Nora: middle siblings. Do not make trouble unless they decide to fight over something. Forgotten about :(

I tend to believe even of she doesn't know explicitly about Shelby's sexuality and such, she wants more for her daughter than the life she's got, playing the role of the dutiful wife, and this is her subtle way of telling her to not fall into that typical life, if that makes sense? I was curious about your thoughts. Great episode as always! I look forward to the next one!

Shelby’s Bedroom

This is her safe space. We see her at her most vulnerable and the most herself in here. It’s everything a teenagers room should be: clothes everywhere, posters on the wall, and a pink beanbag on the floor. There is no performativity here, Shelby can be herself. One of my favourite details is that she both has crowns on display and scattered on the floor. Shelby feels safe here to be silly, and eventually to kiss Becca. This is her space to give into the things she wants. This is also the room that we see outside forces (Dave) permeate and destroy that balance.

The Stairs

A super liminal and transitional space between Shelby’s room and the living room. We see Shelby eavesdropping as decisions are being made that directly impact her, but she is never invited into those conversations. She is always awaiting judgement on the stairs, whether about her family’s perceptions of being gay or over what happened with Becca. This space is in between the safety of her room and the dangers of the main floor. This sense of “in-between” is carried onto the island as external forces always drive and decide Shelby’s direction, actions and next moves.

The Living Room

The public facing room in the house. This is where Dave meets with people from the outside, but the conversations that happen in this room impact the decisions that are made in the kitchen. It is place of judgement, where those external to the Goodkind family can impact family dynamics. The whole space is flooded with the understanding that public perception matters. People come to almost hold council with Dave Goodkind. We never see Shelby in here.

The Kitchen

Hi Anon! Please don't apologize, all I do on this website is ramble. And yes, absolutely, to everything you're saying! Shelby truly is her father's daughter - you can feel all the ways he's influenced her, even as she tries her best to separate herself from her family. When she's faced with a crisis, whether external, like confronting Toni's hostility or doing the bunker interviews, or internal, like her guilt, she defaults back to the sayings and attitudes she learned at home and in church - unconsciously, even with the best of intentions, she starts emulating her father.