Kevin Z

Process Diary

Summary

With miles, I wanted to capture this precise feeling of happiness in giving up and defeat. Where it is more common to explore sorrowful themes in this part of life, I sought to encapsulate the idea of joy in not caring and running away. I was inspired by a scene in ‘Breaking Bad’, where main character Walter White is under the floorboards of his house and laughing hysterically after finding out the last of his stash of money that he toiled to the bone for was gone. There is a degree of incredulity and absurdity to that notion that I found intriguing. As such, I sought to tell a narrative with the track structure and sonic influences. The first portion of the track - hip-hop oriented - sounds jubilant and free, whereas the second portion - ambient and alternative - is more reflective and longing, and the final portion - rock and shoe-gaze inspired - provides the catharsis needed.

Creating this track was an extraordinarily difficult undertaking for me. I had bold and ambitious visions - to blend physical and lo-fi and contrasting sounds together in this genre-bending, dense, and large body of work. 

Track Background - Composition

The foundation of the track was a riff I heard in my head while on a walk, and subsequently replicated in MIDI. It’s a riff that climbs and falls, and gives me a sense of exasperation and energetic weariness. Around this, I built chords and a bass line to match, creating the first version of the chorus in part 1. Through trial and error, I also worked out a  melody line for the vocals - a bit of melodic rapping for the pre-chorus and then strong belted delivery on the main part of the chorus. My vision was to contrast with the uplifting, bright nature of the tune with the darker, sorrowful narrative told by the lyrics. It’s a technique I’ve seen used by artists before, and I thought it’d be an interesting idea to explore.

The post chorus slows down from the more explosive textures in the main chorus, and it’s here I establish a motif - ‘Count on me, I’ll just let you down…’ - that is repeated throughout the song. It’s the narrator’s admittance of failure and self doubt that is the foundation of the major themes present. 

After the second chorus, we hear the guitar riff I developed in its full glory, providing a sense of closure for this section of the song, and helping transition into part 2. This section underwent the most structural changes in the track - at first, I planned for it to be a indie pop ballad-esque singing portion, and then I experimented with some glitchy, experimental electronic vocals with plenty of manipulation. Ultimately, it became a rap/spoken word section with an emotional crescendo towards the end. It’s here that the narrator reflects on his journey as he embarks in search of those ‘miles’; my intent was to highlight his understanding of himself and what brought him here, thus closing emotions off. I also play with the idea that ‘thieves think everyone steals’ - the idea that his animosity towards other people stems from his distrust of himself; for example in the lyric ‘Evil lies in all I meet, for I see mirrors..’. Despite understanding this, he cannot heal, and further dives into his fantasy.

I knew that a softly strummed guitar was the right choice for this section, juxtaposed against the loud and bright sounds of the first part. I lay the groundwork for the chords with a clean tone electric guitar, envisioning this to be replaced eventually with acoustic guitar, but regrettably I had no time in the end. Over the top of the guitar, I improvised little ornamentations. At the end, I felt it needed something to help underpin the emotion towards the second half, and ended up adding a string portion to accompany the guitar, which I really liked. 

The final section of the track is a shoe-gaze inspired, cathartic send off. I knew after the second section that we needed to bring it home with a big finish, but going back to section A didn’t feel natural. As such, I developed a chord progression that I felt seesawed with the feelings of home and the unknown, which I thought was a fitting ending. Admittedly, this was the most difficult part, as I had ambitions probably far too high for what I could possibly do, and ended up cutting a lot of ideas I had. I felt it was right to have the ‘Count on me’ motif return. I also loved the sound of the guitar riff from the earlier parts placed here but with new chords to underpin it, giving it new life and emotion. 

Track Background - Production (Challenges and Solutions)

One of the challenges I made for myself was to incorporate more ‘real’ elements in this track and bring more dirt into the tracks, spending less time in my DAW and more time playing instruments and recording real sound. As such, it was my first time recording real guitar, and trying to properly record vocals. This proved the biggest struggle for me, as I was adjusting to new gear and fighting a battle with the DAW and plugins to get the sound I wanted. For the vocals, one of the major things I learned from this task was developing a vocal chain. Definitely not perfect, but I went from really flat sounding vocals to warmer, more present ones by learning to use compressors, reverb, delay, saturation, panning and layering. 

In order to thicken the vocals, I used a few techniques. The first was to record multiple takes and stack them under each other, EQing them a bit differently. I used different reverbs and enhanced different frequencies in the takes to give the vocal more body; I used this technique a lot in the verses of the song. I also mixed in a pitched down version of the vocals with the dry sound to give them more depth and brevity. For certain sections, I used the technique of using multiple layers and panning on L and R to create a wider image.

To make them more interesting, I really adored pitch shifting and using a phaser to create a really cool, trippy sound and supplemented my vocals with these layers. The use of autotune is also very prevalent in this track, particularly the first part. I like the sound of my voice with and without autotune, but in certain sections the electronic, bright and glimmering sound lent itself well to the hiphop influences I was after. I also liked the idea of the autotune being strong in the first section, where the narrator is closed off and putting up a pretence, and the ‘mask’ shedding off in the second section, with the natural vocals reflecting a more naked insight into their stream of consciousness. 

Throughout the song, I leaned heavily into the use of delays - I felt that this effect helped fill out the track and was sonically apt. These techniques gave the song some psychedelic colours. I used a few different kinds - a slap delay to widen vocals, lo-fi delays to give the spoken word sections more colour, and stereo delays to help make elements sound more grand. 

In the first part of the song, I focused heavily on layer-cake orchestration to create a rich, satisfying sound. I layered a more textured synth bass with a deeper sub bass to give it more body, and had different instrumentation filing out the middle and top end.

A major change that shifted the scope of the track was removing the guitar riff that was playing during the chorus in an earlier draft. After showing the track to Damian, his feedback was that there was too much happening and that there cannot be two foreground elements. I went back to the track and removed it and though it sounded less busy, it was also empty-sounding. I was able to find a middle ground by creating a simplified version of the riff and placing it an octave lower, to maintain the same cross-melody and rhythm I desired but without getting in the way of the vocals. From this point on, I went forward thinking more about foreground, middle ground and background elements rather than just throwing everything I could in, which made the end result sound more polished. 

The most difficult section of the song to produce was the outro towards the back end. I love shoegaze and rock music but to produce it was a different beast to me. This was definitely the biggest creative risk I felt I took and in the end, I am far from nailing it but I am happy with what I’ve produced as a learning experience for me. It was difficult not only finding the right combination of compression/delay/reverb to achieve that distorted sound but also making it fit with the much more ambient vibe of the section that came before. On top of this, I found great difficulty in finding space for the choral singing portion - when mixed too low, it faded too far into the track, and when mixed too high, it sounded jarring and out of place. 

Reflection - What I Learned

Working on this track was an adventure into undiscovered terrain for me, and I learned so much about different mixing techniques, composition and structure, and improving my workflow. I’ve never worked with vocals on this scale, and as such forcing myself to learn how to bus was crucial in handling such a high amount of different tracks. Learning to automate and dive deeper into fundamental effects such as EQ, reverb, compression and when and where to use them was a huge step forward for me. I also gained a deeper insight into layering; I improved in highlighting foreground and background elements as I made major changes throughout, and learning to cut things I didn’t want to in order to simplify the mix. Furthermore, playing real instruments and recording sound that didn’t come from presets or loops was a huge jump for me and I’m excited to see how I can grow in this area. For my next projects, I hope to continue holding those key concepts strong in my mind and getting better at recording and performing. I’d also love to look into other modulation techniques, like granular synthesis and incorporating more non-musical elements, which I felt were a bit lacking in this track.

dreaming of dark hallways

Reflection:

Overall, I am happy with the way this project turned out. I believe I had a strong artistic vision in wanting to capture a specific feeling and my workflow allowed me to realise that in a way that accentuated my digital production abilities. I think the track is inventive and experimental, I am particularly proud of the sound selection and melodic choices I made going inand I focused heavily on bringing a level of grit and humanness to it, though perhaps some of that was not by choice. 

I would say coming out of this, my biggest point of improvement is in the mixing and dynamics - though I am confident I was successfully in basic, clear mixing on this track, many of the problems I faced were centred around trying to fit all my ambitious musical ideas together in a way that actually gelled, and there is no way to do that to a high level without a deeper understanding of mixing. 

I had a lot of fun and fulfilment creating this track, and there is no doubt I am deeply looking forward to any feedback and to begin working on my next work. 

SOUND SOURCES USED:

Ichiko Aoba - Asleep Among Endives (アンディーヴと眠って)

Old Analog TV Noise and static Sound Effects pack 🎵

Drum Kit - Glitch With Friends vol 2: 3GB of FREE glitch, noise, bass

Drum Kit - Drumkit with a few SOPHIE/Flume inspired sounds

Audio from Akira Kurosawa - High and Low [1963]

Various Loops and Sounds/FX from Apple Loop Library [Included with Logic Pro + Garagband]

One of the first issues I came across during the process of creating this track was that adding layers over the primary vocal sample from Ichiko Aoba drowned it out. I would increase the gain on the vocals and they would be too loud - other way around and they were lost too far in the background. I recalled an excellent example of sampling from a track by JPEGMAFIA named ‘Beta Male Strategies’ and studied the way he made his sample work for him. I noticed he used side-chain compression to not only create space for the drums but also to invoke a cool pulsating effect and immediately incorporated it into my mix. I first side-chained the vocals to the kick drum but it didn’t sound quite right - the kick drums were too sparse so the effect was too sporadic. I instead created a drum pattern that dictated the exact points I wanted the compressor to kick in and muted it. This allowed me to control exactly what pulse I wanted the compressor to follow.

I ended up taking this technique and applying it across the project [most notably during Section B]  and the pulsating side chain compression became part of the sound character of the song. 

As for mixing, I believe I did the best I could with my current knowledge and equipment [regrettably, I do not own decent headphones yet or studio monitors, and have only limited knowledge of mixing on top of what we earned in class this year]. I ran through the project and gain staged to the best of my ability. I then ran through each track and eq’d, focusing on dialling in the frequencies I needed most while also considering what place it could have. One of the biggest hurdles I encountered here was the monstrous Section B - with it’s strong, thumping guitars, the dynamic and jumpy bassline and the high tempo drum beat, it was by far the most difficult thing to bring out all the qualities I wanted in the mix in that section. I originally had a deeper bass, but compromised and switched to the moog bass which had more of the crunchy sound around 2kHz - this allowed me introduce more of the warm, punchy lows on the distorted guitar that I wanted to bring out. 

SECTION A:

The sonic backbone of the track is primarily based on a sample I took from Ichiko Aoba’s ‘asleep among endives’. When I first heard this track I fell in love with her ethereal, lullaby-like singing, and upon revisiting it recently, I knew it would be perfect for my piece. I took out small sections I liked and placed them into a repeating structure, shown below.

I used Logic’s built in FlexPitch function to develop a melody and also increased the formant to evoke the idea of youth, along with a hearty helping of reverb.

At this point, I had developed an 8-bar chord progression I liked. My music theory and understanding of chords is still limited at this stage, so I’m having trouble describing the chords I picked in a musical way, but essentially I toyed around with different progressions until I found something that sounded comfortable and warm but with some darker tones as well (see image below). For the instrument, I used some soft synths from Synclavier V, to which I decreased the brightness and added a phaser to create a mellow, shimmering color.

Stepping back a bit now to the intro section, I used two seventh chords and a combination of synths [detailed later on]. The main focus of this section is to set up the scene - I used old analog TV sounds I found from YouTube and a repeating motif of distant television dialogue - sourced from the film  ‘High and Low’ by Akira Kurosawa, one of my favourite films that I first saw on TV on a random foreign movies channel. 

For the drums in this section (shown below) I used Logic’s Drum Machine Designer to sequence a basic boom-bap style beat. The sounds were loaded in from cutting a loop from Apple Loops. I added a decent amount of compression to the drums and cut out a lot of higher frequencies using EQ. I also applied Izotope’s free Vinyl plugin that simulates lo-fi aesthetics such as dust, scratch and wear.

After the drums are introduced, the 8-bar segments play twice. Another prominent feature of this section are two melodies I played on my MIDI keyboard. One is a filtered, bendy lead and the other a soft brassy synth sound, both slightly altered patches from Arturia’s Analog Lab V. The two melodies could be described as having a sort of call and response dynamic. I enjoy the soothing way they interact with each other as well as the vocal sample.

Towards the end of this subsection, another instrument is faded in to smoothen the transition into the ‘bridge’ section. It’s a stripped back version of the second part of the chord progression, focusing on the more minor sounds. It’s a simple but effective synth patch I developed in Arturia’s Minimoog plugin with two oscillators, with one oscillator fine-tuned to create a small wavy detuned effect. 

After the drums are cut, the elements are stripped back - the vocal sample is shifted to a sparser sequence, and the slightly detuned chords lead us downwards. The bass [which is a simple 3 oscillator moog sound] continues but now following the lead chords in a descending fashion. 

As we approach section B, a higher note is added on top of the chords to cement the spooky feeling. A wavy, distant synth patch voices a sparse version of the melody featured in Section B to prime the listener's ear for the impending change. I programmed a kick drum that creates an underlying pulse, and an Apple Loop ‘Dark Automation Topper’ is layered underneath to complement  this in the second bar. 

Also notable in this section is a distorted, screechy guitar texture I sourced by cutting up an Apple Loop named ‘Grinding Guitar Riff’ and pitching it up, EQ-ing and adding reverb and delay to taste. I also used the ‘Tremelo’ plugin to automate panning. This guitar texture carries through Section B as well. The result is a screeching feedback texture that cuts into the soundscape, and drives us towards the nightmare. 

SECTION B:

The primary players in this section are a heavy, crunchy distorted electric guitar and a nimble synth bass that climbs and falls, both with and against the guitar.

The guitars are an Omnisphere sample ‘Your Guitar is on Fire’. I played around with the timbre and filters, and added a pedalboard to increase fuzz. I started off originally with just one guitar, but ended up adding another voice in a higher octave to fill out the sound, to achieve the layer-cake orchestration. The higher guitar alternates between playing a harmony and counter melody that contributes to the intense and aggressive feeling of this section. The guitars describe the story of tumbling through the hallway as halls are closing in.

The guitars are complemented by the bass line; they are simple moog patches [for mini v3] I designed with two triangle oscillators. They carry us through a frenzy-like ascending and descending pattern. The top instrument underpins the ‘dun-dun-dun’ pattern that begins each bar, and resonates as a lower frequency to create an ‘oomph’.

The percussion in this section is also very manic. I sequenced this again with Logic’s drum machine designer, this time with a heavy focus on the kick drum pulse and repeating patterns. The drums are sourced from various free drum kits on the internet [sources for all sounds are listed in a separate post], and some from Logic’s library of drums. Many of the snare hits and metallic sounds use reverb and saturation to help them better fit into the mix. There is a small amount of compression on all the drums, but with a longer attack time to allow the transient to provide that shock. 

The melody reaches the climax and the guitars are stripped back to the simpler pulse we saw in the bridge at the end of Section A. The guitars play a slower melody, letting each note ring out and eventually fade. The synth brass we hear in Section A leads us back into the mellower tones of Section A.

SECTION A/CLOSING:

Here is a rough structure map for my track, ’dreaming of dark hallways’.

For the most part, it follows the structure of ‘Cataplexy’ by Paul Mac. The chords and additional melodies substitute the main ‘melody’ and variations in Cataplexy. Both parts transition from Section A to Section B and back again. However, there are a few significant changes that are detailed below.

Drum Beat changes rather than fades out in Section B:

To contribute to the ‘nightmare’ notion, I opted to use faster paced and glitchier percussion as a form of contrast with Section A. I made this change because I believed that, in this case, strong rhythm was crucial to create the urgent, chasing feeling.

‘Pre-B Section’:

This is a small bridge before Section B, where the main elements of Section A are stripped away and we are gradually introduced to the musical ideas of Section B. This sounded much more natural than fading the elements like in ‘Cataplexy’. I believe this is more consistent with the dark lo-fi genre I was aiming for.

Bringing different elements to Section A-2:

The other day I fell asleep on my sofa with the TV on. It was the kind of deep sleep you have when you’re particularly exhausted, and waking up feels like being pulled out of deep water. It reminded me of when I was a child, and I’d doze off on the old couch in my family’s house in New Zealand. The TV would usually be set to a channel that showed foreign movies, and just when the night started seeping in, I would drift into a state of hypnagogia, the sounds of the film and life outside echoing in my consciousness as I descended. A lingering thought in my head would grab the reins and steer me in their direction, sometimes I would be slipped into a cozy dream but sometimes I’d be led down a long corridor, deep and dark, into the recesses of my mind.