cozymoonlight18

“—c’mon sweet girl, I know you got one more f’me.”

Knees pressed up against your chest, folded in half like a pretzel while one of Steve’s hands holds your legs in place and the other fucks into you brutally. Thumb circling and pressing onto your abused nub, spurring you on to jerk upwards.

“There she is, there’s my good girl. Daddy makin’ you feel good hm?” He cooed breathily, all flushed cheeks and sweaty tendrils of hair sticking to his face. God he’s a vision. Fuller cheeks and heavier set than the pictures of him that scattered around the apartment indicated.

He’s so manly. Gut, tits and all.

“U-uh-huum, fuck,” you whine, eyes screwing shut and back arching off the bed, “you-ah— you always make m’feel good Daddy.”

His fingers yank out of your pulsing hole, ripping another whine from you and subsequently denying you the release that was oh so close, “oh so now we like Daddy, hm? Should let you sit here all soaked and needy after the stunt you pulled earlier.”

The playful lilt of his voice brings you back to earlier at how you even ended up in this situation.

It was a slow night at The Hideout, as always was the case on Tuesdays when Trivia, Bingo or a band weren’t on. A manager always needed to be on, (lest Eddie go on a tirade about his staff getting abused again — it was one time) and since supervisors also have to be rostered on closes; the night time rotation was you, Steve and Roxy.

No one had come in for 25 minutes so you sat at the far end of the bar with a cosmopolitan magazine while the other two chatted and messed around to pass the time. It was lucky Steve was so charismatic with the other staff because it meant that the companies best kept secret would stay that way — a secret.

That most nights after a close you’re stowing away in your managers beat-up pick up to have the most mind blowing sex with said manager. The manager who was about to turn forty next month and that made him precisely 17 years your senior.

Weird, it was weird. Super weird.

Easier to keep that under wraps than to explain to anyone who cared how or why there was attraction there. Steve is an easy guy to be attracted to, great hair, great personality, great body, even now if it was covered by one of his stupid fucking slogan shirts. Today's said 'Blink if you want me' and you'd made a concerted effort to not engage lest you blow this secret out of the water by making fuck-me eyes at him all day.

You still do that but you just make them across the bar while watching him play games with coasters and bottle caps to entertain Roxy. “Oh yeah, that’s right, come to daddy.” He has that playful tone, but the word sends you into another dimension almost.

Roxy pulls a face and immediately loses interest in the game, “gross! Don’t talk about yourself in third person, yuck.”

Coolly, you lift your head and barely raise your eyes to look at either of them deadpan, “that’s what you got from that? The third person reference and not ‘Daddy’?” It was a little on the nose, really, but he started it by saying it outside of the bedroom and you were always a little too good at psychological warfare.

“Everybody loves Daddy,” he defends with a shit eating grin, eyes dropping down to so obviously check you out. He’s getting cocky.

Asshole.

You pull a face, “eugh, as if.” And returned to the magazine without incident.

That attitude, the act of pretending like you weren’t completely obsessed with this man was why you’re being folded in half, pussy squeezing around nothing while Steve slowly tortures you to complete madness.

Though he 'd stopped completely, laid your legs back down and held a hand up to cup the side of your face, “hey, sweetheart — you with me?” Just like that, he can be sweet, dirty, sour and everything in between. He’s seen the faraway look in your eyes and waits for the moment to pass where you’re present.

“Sorry,” you mumble, nudging against his hand, “I’m here. I’m okay.”

“Where’d you go?” His thumb brushes over the apple of your cheek, tracing the contours of your face before resting by your lower lip. He asks because he wants to know, but you’ve disrupted the flow of the moment enough and simply answer by parting your lips for his thumb.

Dropping his head with a groan, his salt and pepper hair flops with it, “that,” he grinds against you, “isn’t an answer, sweet girl.”

You suck his thumb harder, biting down on it gently, urgently while you paw at his pillowy gut for him. “Wan’chu Da’ddy,” against his thumb gets jumbled up and barely a proper sentence but he understands enough to groan again.

“Needy thing,” he tsks, dropping down to kiss along your cheek, pulling his thumb out of your mouth, smearing your own drool all over your lips. The sensation makes your hips buck up, desperate for attention and friction. “What do you want, sweetheart? Mouth or cock?”

His fingers ghost over your folds, the absence of his touch maddening and making you frantic for something. “Mmf—fuck, your cock — please, please I need you to feel you p-please, Steve.”

Cocking his head with that look on his face, you can guess you’ve said something wrong, mouth going dry and an indignant whine forces itself out of you.

“Princess,” he chides, parting your legs and leaning over you, arms braced either side of your head trembling to keep himself upright, “you were doing so well. Try again. Who am I?” His nose nudges up against your cheek, then his wet lips follow in messy little pecks.

Tonight he’s pushier than usual, which means that the playful jabbing at work had gotten to him. Normally you enjoy pushing back but with how desperate you were for something, you acquiesce instantly, “Daddy, I’m sorry—”

“Ah.” He nips at your jaw, a wordless direction to try again.

You gulp and buck up against him, dragging your abused hole along his chubbed up cock. Fuck, he’s always good at turning you on, but tonight was practically unbearable. Another whimper tumbles out, catching into the sob that followed, “Da-ah — Daddy.”

A groan slips out, smothering it against your temple which is the only indicator that he’s on the cusp of falling apart as much as you. “F-hmm, yeah. That’s right, pretty girl. You want Daddy’s cock, hm?”

Whole-body tingles trickle through you as he looks down with those ridiculously playful eyes and already wrecked expression. You risk another buck of your hips, eyes fluttering at the contact of him against you again “mm-hmm, please.”

“Yeah? Want me to remind you of who I am so it sinks in?” He kisses and nips along your throat, “or do you want me to fuck you stupid?”

The decision was already made before it could even form as an answer in your mouth. He sits up, the rush of cold is sobering until you’re blessed with the view of him stroking himself lazily. God he’s perfect.

“Daddy’s gonna fuck his pretty girl stupid, isn’t he?” He grits through his teeth, hungry eyes roving over you laid across his bed. He tracks down from your face, then to your tits and slowly down all the way to your cunt where you clench again under his stare. “Jesus. ‘lright, legs.”

Without a second thought, your legs lift and rest over his shoulders. His lips twitch almost giving way to a laugh, maybe a different night he’d have laughed at how eager you were being. Not tonight. “Thaaat’s my good girl. Look at this pretty pussy, cryin’ f’me.”

Steve liked taking his time, though whatever was in the air had him skipping the theatrics and cutting straight to the finale. Another whine cuts through a sharp breath when he lines himself up, “gonna make y’feel so good, Princess.”

“P-ah, fuck, please Daddy.” You knead roughly into his chest, feeling already so overwhelmed and now impatient to feel him anywhere. Mouth, ass, cunt — somewhere to alleviate the restlessness.

Hearing you, he buries himself completely inside your waiting hole with a guttural moan. The sensation is sharp, pulling a choked sob from you. As always is the case with how wide he is.

“Fuck, feels like heaven, babygirl. Always take me so well,” he groans, taking a moment to collect himself before thrusting at a rapid pace in short bursts. “Mf— y’ know the drill, honey. Touch y’self,” he pants.

Honey.

Through the complete haze of how filled he makes you feel, the surprisingly sweet endearment felt different than all the others. He’s never called you that before, not like this. Cock sheathed completely inside you, bullying your hole, he’s never called you honey.

Heeding his direction, one hand flicks and plays with your tits while the other glides down to circle your clit. God, you were so slick with want for him, picking up the pace whenever he slowed his thrusts for a few minutes.

Since the Christmas party last year and the first time this happened, Steve had an inexplicable ability to make you so beyond horny it was almost frustrating. It was laughable that at one point in your life, you had committed to the idea that sex was boring and you could live without it.

But with this man in all of his glory, has somehow managed to get you going in a way no other person had before.

A year of this; him fucking you into his bed with all the care and time in the world and you letting him, and it has yet to get old.

“Ah fuck y’squeezing Daddy so fucking tight. Mmf — Love fucking my sweet girl raw.”

His thrusts pick up again, so do your fingers around your clit to chase that feeling again. Each snap of his hips leave you feeling so filled and somehow its never enough, for either of you.

“I-hmm — Daddy I’m close,” you breathe and arch up, lifting hips up enough to change the angle enough that both of you groan in unison.

By now, he’d have you ride him, but considering how worked up you’d gotten it was barely a thought to him right now. He loves watching your tits bounce when you ride him as much as you love making his tits jiggle, but now was more about a feverish need to keep momentum and chase that release.

“Ha-I, fuck, I know.” He chuckles quietly, his vocalisations were always soft gleeful little moans. Like he was in complete disbelief that you let him defile you every time he asks for you to come over. You once told him defile was a strong word, and he had said it was hot and continued to fuck into you on his couch.

That tightness starts to strengthen, that sinking feeling in your tummy as your movements feel lighter becomes more apparent with each thrust of his cock and glide of your fingers, “God, don’t stop, please.”

“That’s my good girl. C’mon — come f’me, come for, ah — Daddy.”

Your hips half up buck up, your face scrunches and jaw loosens to let out a breathy moan from orgasmic bliss. It pulses in waves while your cunt clenches and un-clenches around him, urging him into his own release. “ohmygod,” you seize up while it rushes through your core and blooms outward to your head.

His pace picks up now, grunting and moaning quietly while effectively fucking into your now rag-dolling post orgasm body, which he pretends never to get excited over but always fails. He loves fucking you boneless and loose, only ever admitted in the way his eyes rove over your tired face and he smiles proudly about it.

Like yes, he did this to you. He fucked you so good and hard that you’re loose limbed and lethargic in a euphoric daze all from his cock. But its not just his cock, its all of him. Face, body, hair, him.

“Gonna fill up my pretty girl, yeah? You gonna let Daddy fill you up?” He asks but it was never as if you’d tell him no. Because there was something about him filling you up that was so lewd about feeling him for hours afterwards.

You nod lazily, too blissed out to say much of anything, which he knows. Bringing a hand to caress your face and slipping his thumb through plush lips, “thats my girl. So good f’me.” The tenderness stops when he hangs his head and then his hips pick up a brutal pace.

His thumb hooked into your mouth keeps your head steady while he hammers into you with such intense concentration. No one fucks like Steve Harrington. And somehow you were the lucky recipient to experience it all, the sweet talk, the tender moments, the absolute abuse on your pussy when he fucks you hard and fast.

It’s a head spin to feel already at the height of overstimulation that it was almost unbearable.

“Ah, fuck. Fuck. I’m —” his hips notch as close to yours as possible as he spills his load into you, rocking his hips slowly until he’d completely emptied himself. He languidly slides your legs off his shoulders, the position they’d been in for so long has them prickle with pins and needles.

With an exhausted boyish smile, he leans down to pepper wet kiss along your neck and face, and collapses onto the bed, dragging you on top with a tired smile. “Mmf, you are so pretty when you come on my cock, honey.” And he dives back in again for more kisses.

There it is again, honey.

You feel his spend oozing out of you, probably getting all over his meaty thigh, but he doesn’t care and neither did you. He’d clean it up after a moment to catch his breath, which was honestly, your favourite part of being with Steve. How sweet and mushy he got after sending you into an alternate reality with his cock.

“Y’know I was thinking the same about you, honey.” You murmur, drawing shapes across his soft chest, pulling gently at his hair absently.

He doesn’t say anything about the pet name, no verbal acknowledgement that indicated he had thoughts about it. But there was a self satisfied little smile on his lips and that look of content in his eyes that gave away more than words ever could.

And yeah, that checks out, but you felt the exact same way.

“Travis?”

The name seemed to echo into the space between you and him – and your dad – the edges of the sound catching and reverberating against everything until the weight of it finally crashed through your mind. You didn’t register how your breathing had completely stopped as soon as you said the word, like you were right at the very apex of a roller-coaster before the terrifying vertical drop – a drop that came in the shape of two brown eyebrows pulling together and a head tilt that could rival the one puppies do when they’re trying to figure something out.

“W-what? How do you know my name?” He asked, confused but his lips pulled slightly in a smile, like the situation amused him. Of course, he hadn’t recognized you from a single word escaping your mouth. It wasn’t enough of a sample to allow him to link the very pretty girl in front of him to the one he had been speaking to for a few months now. The one he had been telling over the phone that he wanted to feel riding him as he made a mess all over himself for her mere hours before.

You opened your mouth, but no words came out. You didn’t know how to tell him who you were, especially not with your dad right there, who was watching the situation with a puzzled look on his face.

Travis’ eyes took in the details of your face, and even though he couldn’t place you, he offered you an out. “Oh! Did we go to Sunny Valley High School together? ‘Cause if so, I have to admit I don’t remember much from that time.” He chuckled nervously and scratched his scalp, shooting a side glance at your dad before looking back at you. “Wasn’t really on my best behavior back then, hah. And that’s kinda puttin’ it lightly.” He was totally a stoner in high school, but he felt hesitant to say that since your dad did have a pretty ‘anti-drugs’ kind of style.

Your lips pulled into a smile, and you let out a small chuckle. You shook your head gently and looked down at the set of keys in your hand, fumbling with the plastic keychain with the ‘SB-2031’ inscription on it. His voice and the way he talked pulled you out of your initial shock. This was just Travis.

Your best friend. Your used-to-be-anonymous best friend. Your best friend with benefits. Benefits that came in the tune of having phone sex almost everyday.

You had to be discreet, not that you thought you were doing anything wrong, but you really didn’t want your dad to understand the depth of what you had been doing with a man that clearly didn’t know your face.

You spoke up as you kept fiddling with the keys. “No, um… it’s me?” You managed to look into his eyes and say your name in a question. “From that online game?” Your eyes widened a bit, hoping that Travis would understand what you were putting down and pick it right up.

As soon as your name left your lips – especially since he had actually heard enough of your voice now – Travis’ whole expression opened in recognition. His mouth hung open slightly as the corners pulled up, his ears turned bright pink as well as his cheeks, and his eyes were completely and utterly fixed on your face. It was like he was drinking you in – a man stuck in the desert for a few days before finally reaching an oasis. “O-oh…” He said your name and smiled softly.

And then, against all odds, he stayed silent. He looked at you for the first time – well, the first time knowing who you were – and all the usual noise and voices inside his head went unnervingly quiet. The kind of quiet that can only come after everything had been too loud for too long before. The one that could make your skin crawl if it wasn’t welcome. The kind that made you forget that there was an almost sixty-year-old man right next to you.

Your dad cleared his throat, making both you and Travis turn your heads toward the older man as he rocked back on his feet and gave you a tight-lipped smile.

Travis then looked back at you and grinned widely. “Can’t believe I’m finally meetin’ you. Feels… surreal.” A little laugh slipped out of him at the admission.

You giggled shyly with him and then turned to your father. “I’m sorry, dad. Um… This is Travis. We’ve never actually met in person, but we play this game online where you can talk to the people on your team? And we became friends on there, so yeah.”

Your dad nodded slowly, taking in the new information. You knew that if you had said you had met him chatting anonymously on an online forum, he would not have liked it. He would have thought that you had put yourself in danger and he wouldn’t have trusted Travis. But with a game, knowing how much it was a pastime you had enjoyed when you were growing up? That felt safer.

“Ah! Well, that’s nice, isn’t it? Nice to meet you, son. And you didn’t know he worked here?” Your dad asked you as Travis nodded as if to say nice to meet you too.

You shook your head, your cheeks turning slightly crimson as you thought that you had learned exactly what he sounded like in the most intimate of ways, but never his place of employment. “Uh, no. It usually stays pretty anonymous on those games,” you explained to him.

Travis was back to looking at you with a fond expression on his face before you nodded toward the elevator. “So uh… the unit?” You kept saying things with a questioning inflection when you were nervous.

Travis shook his head, visibly snapping himself out of his staring, before he immediately got into action. “Y-yeah! Just follow me. You’ll see, it’s like really confusin’ down there with all the different sections and sh- uh… and stuff. I mean, even for me and I’m here all the time. Well, I guess you already know since you have obviously come in here before, but…”

In true Travis fashion, he kept talking the whole way down the elevator, through the hallways, until you reached the unit. He held out his hand once you arrived, and without him having to ask, you gently placed the keys in his palm as your fingers grazed it softly. He gave you a warm smile before unlocking the unit and pulling on the handle to open the heavy metal door. “So, there you go. I’m uh… supposed to leave you guys to it. Give you some privacy. So… do y’all think you’re okay to find your way back to the elevator and all?”

You nodded sweetly before your dad spoke. “Yeah, we got it, son. Thank you.”

Travis looked at him and gave him a small nod and smile, before his gaze settled back on you. “Alright, then. It was nice finally seein’ ya. Here.” He gave you back your keys, and this time, he purposefully let his fingers linger against yours.

You swallowed thickly, your heart hammering as you nodded swiftly. “Thanks, Trav. Um… yeah.” You cursed yourself internally for your inability to string words as you offered him a pitiful but fond expression.

But the way he tilted his head kindly and looked at you like he knew exactly what must have been going on in your brain made you feel like he simply got it. He knew you by now – the anxiety, the shyness – so of course he didn’t hold it against you.

He left after that, nodding to your father before walking back toward the elevator. He looked once over his shoulder before disappearing around the corner, but you hadn’t seen it, your father already pulling you into the unit to fetch the tools.

Right, your leaky faucet. That’s why you were here.

It took a few minutes, but you managed to find the toolbox your dad had given you when you moved here. “Ah, there it is, Pickle.”

He opened it, made sure he had everything he needed, before you both made your way out, locking the unit and heading for the elevator.

Once you reached the entrance again, Travis was at his desk reading a book. He looked up and smiled when he heard the elevator ding. You tapped your father’s forearm as you got out. “Wait for me in the car, okay? I’ll just be a minute.”

He looked at you with a puzzled expression, but your gaze was on Travis. That told him everything he needed to know. “Okay, sweets. I’ll be out there if you need me.”

Your dad left through the glass doors as you made your way over to Travis, your hands burying themselves in your pockets. “Hey,” you said softly, but the slight shake in your voice betrayed your nerves.

He got up and rounded the desk to stand in front of you. “Hi.” He smiled bright and boyish, making you bite the inside of your cheek.

You took the time to memorize how he looked. His hair was bleached with a brown regrowth, the strands looking weirdly soft even after they had obviously gone through a few rounds of chemicals. The moles that peppered his skin – especially the two close ones on his cheek and the few that went down his neck – looked like dots on a map inviting you to travel and discover what each one had to offer. His big and impossibly gentle hazel eyes paired nicely with the slight dark circles under them, helping to soften them even more.

And then, your eyes went down to his chest. He looked broad and strong, and even though you couldn’t exactly see everything since he had on an orange button-up over a gray shirt – the ‘Atchison Storage’ jacket gone now – you knew that it was the kind of strength that was caring and steady instead of hard and harsh. You expected to see a nice little layer of fat over the muscles, something comfortable to rest onto. Your gaze then went back up to his lips – pink and full and so damn kissable – as they moved.

Fuck. Had he been talking?

His voice cut through the haze in your mind at just the right time, the little voice inside yourself telling you to get yourself together, he’s a friend. “…so yeah. I’m sorry we had to meet like this. I know you kinda wanted to keep up the whole anonymity and shit, and um…”

You shook your head softly. “No, it’s fine. I… Um, this is good. Kinda broke the ice.” You were being genuine, but the stress etched into your features made him worry.

Even then, his shoulders relaxed slightly at your words. “Y-yeah, okay. I’m glad you think so.” And then you saw how he seemed to do the same thing you had just done, his eyes sweeping over your features in quiet awe. You felt the blush creep up on your cheeks.

He spoke up again. “Maybe since we uh…” He gestured between the both of you. “Maybe we could hang out sometime?”

A sharper flair of anxiety lit up the inside of your ribcage, the feeling almost scalding, but you knew it was because this was new for you. It was new, and you couldn’t predict what would happen if you accepted to see him again. But you also knew that you trusted him, and that even if it’s uncomfortable, the wave of anxiety always comes back down when you stick to the stressful situation and don’t avoid it. Your therapist, Jenna, had repeated that to you – or a close iteration of it – many times when you were first starting to deal with your anxiety.

You nodded, your hand coming up to your sternum as your palm felt the heat inside you. “Y-yeah, we could.”

He nodded for a long while, too long actually, like he was trying to convince himself that you had accepted his offer. “C-cool, okay. I’ll text you?”

“Sounds good. I should uh… probably get back to my dad.” You said with a small smile as you started to walk back toward the entrance, pointing at it with your thumb.

“Yeah, of course! I hope you have a nice night, um… See you soon, then.” He wiped his hands on his pants, his palms slightly clammy from his own inner turmoil.

“See you, Travis.”

And as you were about to turn around to leave, he raised his hand like he had just remembered something. You were further away so he spoke up louder. “And say ‘hi’ to Sergio for me!”

You laughed, the explosion coming out of you and releasing with it some of the tension you had accumulated. “I will!”

He watched you leave with a dazed look on his face, blinking rapidly as he leaned against the desk and crossed his arms over his chest. “Damn,” he muttered. She’s beautiful, he thought.

As you slid into the passenger’s seat, your dad gave you a knowing look. He put the car in drive, the humid air whooshing in through the open windows. “So… Travis, huh?”

You turned your head to look at him before rolling your eyes. “Oh, don’t start.”

He laughed – a sound that betrayed numerous years of paying bills and knowing his daughter – before he reached across the console and patted your knee twice. “Come on, Pickle. I’ve seen the way you look when you’re infatuated with a boy since you were seven years old and in love with your ice-skating instructor.”

You groaned as you tipped your head back, but you couldn’t help the embarrassed giggle that left you. “Oh my god, dad!”

“What? It’s true! Oh, and all the actors and singers throughout the years. I mean, come on. I know my own daughter.” He was looking at the road, but he had a soft smile under his moustache.

You shook your head as you kept grinning. “S’not like that. He’s really just my friend, I hadn’t even met him before!”

“Yeah, yeah. Okay. If you say so. But… I saw the way he was looking at you.”

You were pretty sure that if you had a blue light next to your face, you could convincingly pull someone over from how red your cheeks were glowing. “Dad, can we not?”

He chuckled and nodded apologetically. “Sorry, sorry. Just saying.” He shrugged before continuing. “He kinda looked like bad news anyway. Did you see that tattoo on his neck?”

You giggled, feeling more like a teenager with a crush than a fully grown woman, and joked around with your father for the rest of the ride back to your apartment.

****

Your father left the morning after, kissing your forehead and pulling you in for a hug with a “come see us soon, huh? Love you, Pickle.”

You nodded and smiled at him, a little pang of guilt in your chest since you hadn’t made the trip to go see your parents that many times since moving out. “I will, dad. Love you too. Drive safe.”

Once the door was closed behind him, you took a moment to realize all that had happened the night before. You paused in your kitchen, and really if you thought about it, nothing had changed except for the fact that you couldn’t hear the leaky tap of your kitchen sink anymore, and that you now knew how hot Travis was. And fuck, was he your type.

So, the whole day, all you could think about was him. His portrait kept flashing in your mind as you were working, and every time, a small flutter of something sweet and warm ignited in your chest. It was just like that feeling you get when someone tells you they saw something – maybe a little trinket that shouldn’t have mattered but did – that reminded them of you. Travis made you feel seen in a way that you weren’t sure you ever had felt before.

When you got home that night, bending down to pick up Sergio and push your face in the fur of his neck, all you wanted to do was call Travis. You let Sergio down with a “Oof, you’re heavy, big boy,” before taking out your phone, staring at the contact as your finger repetitively tapped the side of your heavy-duty phone case.

It hit you then.

You didn’t know what to do. Should you call him and do as if it was any other night? Talk for a few hours before you both got horny from each other’s voices and had to do something about it? Or should you mellow it down since you had actually met now? It kind of felt awkward to go back to how it was, for some reason.

You debated it for so long that you managed to psych yourself out and not reach out to him. “He talks a lot. He’ll text eventually and then I’ll figure out how to respond. Yeah, that works,” you told yourself repeatedly.

Except it was hours later now. And he didn’t text. Even when he was now definitely at work and able to.

So your mind got to racing.

Maybe he saw me and I’m not his type. Maybe he lost all interest and doesn’t even want to keep the phone sex thing going. Maybe I just lost my only friend. Shit. He probably thinks I’m too shy and awkward. Ugh…

By the time your alarm blared loudly as if saying “Congrats on getting no sleep, bitch!”, your overactive brain had already managed to convince you that everything was over. You hadn’t even needed the embarrassment of checking in with him – of texting and getting no answer back – to simply know it was done.

You whined and forcefully shut your alarm clock off, sending a little piece of plastic flying into the air and under your desk.

You got up and started getting ready for work, feeling discouraged as you dragged your feet to your bathroom. You were in the process of trying to mask the bags under your eyes with your dried-up concealer when your phone buzzed on the edge of the sink. You picked it up and your heart stopped when you saw the ‘Travis’ notification.

Travis : Hey! So, I’m really sorry I didn’t text you last night

Fuck, there it was. He was going to tell you that he thought you’d be better off not talking anymore. Great.

Then, your magic rectangle buzzed again. And again. And again…

Travis : Truth is, I didn’t know how to start and I was kinda waiting for you to reach out first haha but now my shift is done and I can’t stop thinking about it

Travis : So here it goes

Travis : I was really surprised to see you when you came with your dad, and I know you didn’t really want that to happen, but I’m not mad it did

Travis : I’ve been wanting to actually meet you since probably the first week we started chatting if I’m being honest

Travis : so maybe that’s selfish, IDK, but yeah

Travis : and there’s many more things I want to say, but I guess I should wait until I see you again

Travis : so I wanted to know if you wanted to hang out sometime for real, or if you just said so the other day because you felt like you had to. I get it if you did, if you felt pressured cause we were face to face, yk? And I’ll respect that

You couldn’t help the stingy feeling in the corners of your eyes. You couldn’t have been more wrong, and it felt like the weight of the entire fucking world – dramatic much – got lifted off your shoulders as you read his oncoming flow of thoughts.

You : Hey! I’m sorry I didn’t text either, I was kinda overthinking everything too

You : and I don’t regret it either, btw. I’ve been wanting to meet you as well but I was too scared, you know me lol

You : But I do want to hang out, if you’re up for that :)

You couldn’t see him, but Travis beamed at his phone as he stopped his nervous pacing to drop back on his bed with a happy sigh.

Travis : Fuck I’m happy to hear that haha

Travis : I thought about it and if you want to, we could go to Copperwood Park? Have a little walk or something

That’s the park you had left your phone number at for him to pick up. For some reason, that felt like a perfect place to meet, and your stomach twisted in anticipation.

You : Yeah, that sounds fun! :)

You : Do you know when you’d wanna go?

Travis : I’m off on Friday, maybe we could go after you’re done with work? Around 6-ish?

You : Yeah, perfect

You were smiling brightly. You didn’t have a big shift on Friday, just a quick afternoon one that wouldn’t tire you out too much for the date.

Wait… was it a date?

He kept calling it ‘hanging out’. Maybe you should stick to that and not make it into something it isn’t and put unnecessary pressure on yourself. He’s your friend. This was going to be a friendly hang out. Easy.

****

Except the whole week leading up to it felt off.

You weren’t calling each other like you used to, not really even texting more than to make sure the other had a good shift or was doing okay. You used to call each other everyday. You used to talk for hours. You used to jerk off together, for Christ’s sake. Maybe this was a terrible idea.

Still, out of sheer bullheadedness of needing to stick to anxiety-inducing situations, you didn’t back down from it. And when Friday came with a little text from Travis at around 9 AM – before he usually went to sleep – you were overcome with that same warm feeling you had started associating with him.

Travis : Good morning! I hope you’re doing well. Just wanted to make sure we were still on for tonight? 6 at the park? :)

You : Good morning/evening to you! Yeah, still good for tonight. I’ll meet you there?

Travis : Yeah, perfect :)

You : Good :) see you then, sleep well

Travis : Thanks, have a good shift

****

When you got home at 4-ish PM and into your shower, the water felt calming, pulling your consciousness to the feeling of liquid heat against your skin instead of all the thoughts about everything that could go wrong. Your shift had been busy – more clients than usual – which usually would have annoyed you, but today, you’d been grateful for the distraction.

Picking out an outfit had then been a pain, until you decided to not overthink it. Just a friendly hangout, remember? So you put on normal jean shorts that went down to your middle thigh, a t-shirt that felt like you, and your broken-down Converse sneakers. It was the end of summer, and the evenings were still warm and comfortable.

Your left knee bounced terribly while you were driving toward Copperwood Park. The playlist you had put on filled the interior of your miraculously-still-running car, but your brain wasn’t able to pay any attention to it. No, you were busy brainstorming ideas of what to talk about if the conversation ever lulled. Maybe you could bring up Sergio, your job, the forum you met on, his job, the park… Fuck, it all sucks.

You let your ribcage swell up with a big breath before letting it all out, trying to calm your nerves as you parked near the bench you had left your number at for him to find a few months earlier.

You could see a blonde man sitting on it, his back to you, and you immediately recognized him. The flame in your ribcage grew fiercer, licks of it reaching all the way up to your jaw, until you forced yourself to take a few deep breaths.

You’re okay, you’re just doing something new. It’s normal to feel anxious. It’ll come back down once you’re in it.

You got out of your car and made your way over to the bench, your hands twisting together in front of you. Even with his back to you, you could see he was wearing a simple gray shirt with relaxed jeans. He had on skater shoes, which you thought was really cute. “Hey, Travis?”

He turned around at the sweet sound of your voice saying his name, and for an instant all your worries melted away. He looked at you with a genuine smile on his face and a slight furrow of his brows, like he was slightly surprised he actually got to see you again but impossibly happy he did. “Hey.” He said your name softly as he got up to come stand in front of you. “It’s good to see you again.”

You smiled and nodded, avoiding his eyes as you looked at the ground. “It’s nice to see you, too.”

He noticed, but it didn’t bother him. He expected it from you, since you had told him many times before how social interactions felt for you with people you didn’t know well. He spoke up before the silence got awkward. “I uh… thought maybe we could get some ice cream? From that little shop over there, you ever tried it?”

You looked up for an instant, and the lowering sun caught your eyes, simultaneously brightening your irises and deepening your pupils, and Travis could have sworn he stopped breathing for a moment. But just as soon, you looked away again. “Oh, yeah! I didn’t think you’d be down for that since you basically just woke up.” You giggled nervously, and your eyes met his once more. Oh, he was already entranced by them – any inch you’d give, he’d follow.

He chuckled and gestured to the shop as you started walking toward it. “Heh, you kinda stop carin’ about things like that after a while of doin’ the whole night versus day shit. It’ll be a nice breakfast, don’t you think?” He said with a playful smirk.

You laughed and nodded. “Oh sure! Not really different from sugary cereals if you really think about it.”

He laughed as well. “See? You get it!” he exclaimed as you reached the counter of the shop, greeting the lady working there as she smiled at you both. “Alright, Angel. What would you like to try, hm?”

The nickname rolled off his tongue so casually, exactly the same way it always did on the phone, and it made something twist in your stomach. On one hand, the familiarity of it helped to ground yourself and feel more present, the knot of anxiety in your chest starting to ease. On the other, it made your heart flutter and your mind unable to process his question normally. “Uhm…” Your eyes raked over the menu but none of it was registering.

He kept talking. “There’s this butterscotch one that’s really good, if you kinda like caramel stuff. They have soft serve too. You can dip it in chocolate, and it gets all hard on it, you ever had that? Mm, let’s see what else… Oh! Blueberry sorbet?” He looked at the lady with an inquisitive look.

She explained that it was new, made with fresh blueberries, and that it was great if you liked the tiny fruits and tangy flavors. It came in a bowl with a spoon because it was quite soft.

Travis looked at you with eyes that betrayed how excited that had gotten him. “I think I’m getting’ that, I love blueberries.”

You smiled and nodded. That did sound really good. “Yeah, me too.” You reached around to fetch your wallet in your bag, but Travis was already ordering.

“We’ll take two small blueberry sorbets, please.” He handed the lady a crisp ten-dollar bill, and he left the coins she had given him back in the tip jar.

Your cheeks flushed slightly. “Thank you, Travis. I could have paid for myself, you know.” You didn’t want him to feel like he had to pay for you, especially since you had never really confirmed this was supposed to be a date. Just a ‘friendly hangout’, supposedly.

He shook his head, leaning on the counter as you waited for your sorbets. “I know, I know. But I invited you, didn’t I?” His voice was soft and caring – not harsh, even though he was disagreeing with you. “I wanted to pay, so… you can quit worryin’.” He waved his hand as if it was obvious and tilted his head, studying your expression to make sure you were okay with it.

“O-okay.” You said simply, the tip of your ears getting red as you looked away again, pinching your lips to hide your smile.

Shortly after, the woman gave you your two frozen treats with a warm “there you go, enjoy!” Instinctively, you both started walking at an unhurried pace on the path that followed the sinuous stream in the middle of the park.

You took a spoonful of the sorbet, letting it melt in your mouth, before you hummed in appreciation. The flavor was bright and popped on your tongue deliciously, the squeeze of lemon you could taste in there helping to balance out the sweetness. “Oh, it’s incredible,” you told Travis.

He harmonized with your hum, tilting his head back in delight as the first sample hit his tastebuds. “Holy shit. That’s the best sorbet I’ve ever had.”

You giggled around a mouthful of the purple dessert, your shoulder lightly bumping his arm. “Have you ever had sorbet before?”

He grinned as he looked at your profile, bumping his elbow against your arm again. “Dunno, but it’s still the best.”

Conversation picked up quickly after that. Travis asked how your shift had been and listened with rapt attention. He kept nodding his head and asking you questions on how your job worked while he ate his sorbet. You also talked about the park and how you used to come here a lot when you first moved into town to get acquainted with your new environment. He told you about a few memories he had of this place when he was younger and doing things he maybe shouldn’t have been doing, like smoking pot and whatnot. “I used to smoke a lot in high school, but not really anymore. I don’t even drink.” He let out a soft chuckle. “Not that I think I had a full-on problem or anythin’! I just don’t think it helped my whole shtick of ‘getting talked into things easily’.”

“Yeah, I get that,” you said sweetly, remembering that time he had told you how he never had a sober sexual experience before you had done the whole ‘phone sex’ thing. You were starting to understand him better, and a strong feeling of protectiveness washed over you. “Like… having your inhibitions lowered made it even easier for you to jump into things without really thinking about it?”

He nodded, pushing a dollop of sorbet in the bowl with his spoon as you both kept walking leisurely. “Yeah, exactly. And I really didn’t like wakin’ up the next day and not knowin’ if I did somethin’ I shouldn’t have, y’know? ‘Cause there was a strong chance that I had done something.”

You hummed in understanding, looking ahead at the path as the conversation naturally changed to something else, Travis finding new topics to talk about and transitioning to them smoothly. It flowed so easily, and you found yourself wondering why you had been nervous in the first place. That was how it always had been with Travis – no matter the way you were communicating, or how your relationship developed, it always fell into easy and safe territory alarmingly quickly.

At one point, you threw away your empty sorbet bowls and decided to sit on a bench – yellow, this one – that was overlooking the lazy river. The sun was starting to set, painting the sky in hues of childhood memories – oranges, pinks and purples – that could rival the brightness of the blueberry dessert you had just eaten.

You were looking intently at Travis as he spoke, his hand gesturing to illustrate the work encounter he had had earlier in the week. “Right, so this guy comes in at Atchison, and like, y’know, I greet him and shit. And then I show him down to his unit, like I did with you, ‘member? And when we get there, he unlocks and opens it before I can leave, and he basically shows me his like, homoerotic art collection. Like so many paintings and sculptures. I mean, some really cool but others just straight up weird, and then he steps super close to me and asks me if I wanna make out!” He scoffs, shaking his head.

Before you could even start to worry that he’d say something you didn’t agree with, his shoulders raised as he spoke, his palm turning to the sky. “Like, at least buy me dinner first, Jesus.” He chuckled, burying his hand in his hair.

You giggled in relief, averting your eyes away from his as you talked. “Well, that’s being forward alright.”

He scoffed again, his expression softening when your gaze found his again. He noticed how you seemed to always make eye-contact when he spoke, but never when you did. “Yeah, tell me about it.”

“What did you do?” You asked, your hands tucking under your thighs as you looked at how a few ducks were idly floating on the water.

He shrugged before answering. “I said ‘oh no, thank you’, and just stepped away.” He giggled a bit before continuing. “He was good-looking and all, but I’m not…” He looked over at you and searched for the right words. “I’m not really looking for that right now.”

You nodded and looked down at your feet, pushing a small rock around with your shoe. You didn’t really know what he meant by ‘that’ – a past you probably wouldn’t have pushed, afraid to ask something wrong and mess everything up. But the present you did. “Not really looking for what? Like, romantic endeavours or…?” You cringed slightly at your question, but you stuck with it as your eyes lifted to look back at him.

He thought about it, and it was his turn to avoid your gaze. After a few seconds, he shook his head as he spoke gently. “No, just… my focus is elsewhere, I guess.” He looked at you then, his hazel eyes open and conveying a meaning you weren’t sure you had the right to catch in his words. Your heart did an annoying little flutter, warmth spreading in your ribcage.

You nodded as if you understood perfectly, even though it probably confused you even more. Did he mean his focus was on someone else or on something else? Because the first possibility and the way he looked at you had you’re your stomach clenching, while the second one cooled you down because it was also entirely plausible.

The subject was dropped after that, Travis catching on that maybe he had said a little too much. He talked about the ducks – how cute they were with their little butts poking out of the water as they tried to reach algae – and you started to laugh with him again. He could listen to that sweet sound forever, he thought.

Time went on, the sky slowly turning into a bruised kind of purple, a few shimmers peaking out between the thin clouds. “I should probably head home,” you said reluctantly. “I got an early shift.”

“Yeah, of course. Let me walk you to your car,” he said as he stood up and offered you his hand to help you stand.

The gesture made your cheeks burn as you took his hand and got to your feet. “Thanks, Trav.” You smiled warmly at him as you let go, the lingering warmth from his fingers still making your skin tingle.

You reached your car and turned to face him, rocking back on your heels. He did the same as he spoke up. “So, uh… I had a really good time. I’d be down to do that again, or somethin’ else, too.”

“Yeah! M-me too. Just um…” You twisted your hands together. “Can we keep texting and calling each other? It kinda felt weird to almost not talk to you all week.” You said with a soft sigh, worried your request might be too much.

His expression softened and he took a step closer. “Yeah, of course! I’m sorry, I didn’t wanna be too much since we had this planned. But yeah, I kinda felt weird too not talking to you.” He laughed softly.

You smiled and let out a breath of relief. “Okay, good. Well then… Have a good rest of your day, Travis.”

His arms came up like he wanted to give you a hug, but he wasn’t sure if that was okay. They hovered in the air, frozen in time, before you quickly got the hint and wrapped your arms around his middle section and pressed your cheek to his chest.

It didn’t last long – the duration was amply appropriate for a friendly hug – but it still lit something inside you. The way his chest felt so warm against your skin even through his t-shirt. The clean smell that enveloped you, with the slightest bit of musk and was that vanilla? that you didn’t know you’d soon associate as being Travis. The way his arms wrapped around your shoulders and his fingers splayed on your back, engulfing you in his frame.

You felt his thumb swipe once, before he pulled back and let his arms fall back to his sides. “And you have a good night, Angel.”

You were positive that you had to be completely red at that point, the feeling of the hug and of that forsaken nickname hitting you exactly where it mattered.

You got into your car with a small wave, watching him retreat to his own. You cranked the AC to the max, needing to cool yourself down. For some reason, during the whole time you were just together, you had almost forgotten about the extra-friendly activities you had engaged in with each other. But now, everything was coming back to you and your mind kept thinking about his sideburns and his biceps, and you could feel your core pulsing with a vicious need. “Not now, oh my god,” you told yourself as you started the drive back to your apartment.

****

You ignored the blazing inferno in your lower belly anytime you talked to him for the next few days. The calls had started back up again after you both agreed you wanted them to, but they always stayed into strictly friendly territory now. Sometimes, Travis would be making his rounds at work, talking away, while you’d listen and make yourself dinner, Sergio purring as he’d rub against your legs. Other times, you wouldn’t even be talking, just hanging out on the call together. He’d be reading or doing laundry, and you’d sneak glances at him – oh yeah, you had started video calling now that it wasn’t an issue – and hoping he wouldn’t catch you. You didn’t know that he did the exact same thing.

One Tuesday night, you were sprawled out on your belly on your made bed, reading your book. The soft scent of the marshmallow candle you had lit about a half-hour prior danced around your room while the fairy lights gave it that whimsical feeling you enjoyed so much. It was peaceful, and just the night you needed after your awful shift earlier. Perfect.

And then your phone rang, shattering the careful bubble wrapped around you. You picked it up.

A regular call. From Travis.

You furrowed your brows. He had told you it was going to be his day off and that he’d try and catch up on some sleep, which had undeniably been a motivation in wanting to make the night good for yourself, since you wouldn’t be talking to him. Clearly, he wasn’t sleeping, though.

You picked up the phone, turning to lay on your back on your plush comforter. “Hey, Trav. What’s up, weren’t you supposed to sleep in?”

You were immediately met with heavy breathing on the other end of the call, a small whimper escaping Travis’ mouth. It instantly lit up the fire between your legs as you felt your arousal pool low, low, low. But there was also a sharp pang of anxiety stabbing through your chest.

“H-hey, Angel. I uh… I couldn’t sleep anymore.” His voice sounded husky.

“Oh… what’s the matter?” You asked in such a sweet tone, and he almost groaned at the sound of your delicate voice.

“I…” He swallowed thickly. “I know we haven’t d- uh… in so long, but…”

You could hear how it seemed to take him so much effort to say, like he was wrestling with himself. He let out a shaky breath. “I’m thinkin’ ‘bout you. I can’t stop thinkin’ about you. And I… don’t know if I wanna stop, Angel.”

Your breath hitched. You hadn’t done anything sexual over the phone in so long, and you weren’t sure you could still do it, at least not in the same casual way as before. “Trav…”

“I know, I know…” He sounded apologetic, like he knew maybe he didn’t have the right to do this anymore, not after the arrival of the new variables in your friendship. “I know this is fucked. I thought I could go back to normal – I could just do as if our friendship was never like that, ‘cause it was supposed to be just casual and shit, whatever we were doin’. But… I’m realizin’ maybe it wasn’t for me.” The next words rushed out of him. “And I know that’s not fair! ‘Cause I didn’t tell you, and now I’m just throwin’ this at you outta nowhere, and I can’t expect you to wanna continue doin’ what we were doin’ before we met for real, or even to keep seein’ me now, but…”

He could hear the shakiness of your breathing as you listened to him, staying silent to allow him to express himself fully. God, he loved that about you. “I kinda wish you would, Angel. It… meant somethin’ to me, even just as friends.”

You took in a ragged breath, the knot inside your ribcage tightening and squeezing until it was getting harder to breathe. “Travis, I… oh, god.”

You pressed a hand to your sternum, feeling the rapid beating of your heart, the heat spreading at a dangerously fast pace. “It’s not that – wheezing inhale – that I don’t want to, I just – fuck…” Your vision was getting blurry and your head felt like it was spinning like a Beyblade.

Travis picked up on it immediately. “Hey, hey…” He said your name softly, like he was trying to reach through the phone and soothe you. “Breathe.”

Your jaw clenched, your eyelids closing as they vibrated with the freshly pumped adrenaline coursing through your veins. “I-I’m trying, s’not…” You inhaled raggedly again, your hand reaching for your comforter to squeeze it, but the sensation barely registered.

“Okay, don’t worry, Angel… S’just a panic attack, right? It’ll pass, just keep trying to breathe, ‘kay? In… and out. Forget what I said, m’kay? We can talk about it another time.” He tried to be reassuring, but he was starting to feel anxious as well. He had never heard you get one this bad before.

All your tricks weren’t working. You tried to focus on things you could see, but your eyes kept bouncing frantically from object to object, never landing on one long enough to ground you. Travis’ words didn’t even absorb in your foggy brain. “Travis… can’t breathe…”

His heart broke at the fear in your voice. He immediately got up, threw on sweatpants, a white shirt and a hoodie before crossing through his apartment and snatching his keys along the way. “I’ll be right there, Angel. Keep tryin’ for me.”

As soon as he reached his car, he realized that he didn’t know where you lived. “Focus on me, sweetheart.”

“Hm?” It was a miracle that you still had the phone pressed to your ear, your hands shaking as you pressed yourself against the headboard of your bed. It felt as though you were seeing yourself from so far inside your mind.

“What’s your address, Angel? Can you tell me that?” His voice sounded slightly frantic as he pulled out of his apartment building’s parking lot, heading toward the side of town he at least knew you lived in. He normally would have never spoken on the phone while driving, but he didn’t care right now. He had to get to you.

Your brows furrowed as you managed to hear his questions, and you gave him your address almost on instinct – the same way you would give it to a taxi driver while black-out drunk.

“Okay, got it. Hang tight, okay? That’s not far, I’ll be there in not even ten minutes, ‘kay?” He pulled the phone away, putting it on speaker, to type it in his phone and follow the directions.

You could only nod, body shaking like a leaf in a hurricane as you tried to focus on your breathing. You knew that if you hadn’t been this deep into the attack, you wouldn’t have wanted him to see you like this. You would have told him not to come, to stay home and that you’d deal with it. But you felt like you were drowning, like you’d die if it kept going, and you needed him. Which was ironic, because he kind of was the reason for your attack in the first place.

He kept talking, trying to get you to breathe or calm down or anything. You tried to focus on his voice – you really did – to latch on his words and bring your consciousness away from the frenzied worrying going on inside your mind. The panic had started because you got anxious at the idea of being intimate with him again, at what it would mean, at what could happen if it didn’t work out and you lost him. But now, fully in the worse of it, none of that seemed to matter anymore. No, you felt like you were fighting for your life – blood pulsing in your ears, lungs unable to expand, hands completely numb – and you were terrified you’d get stuck in this feeling. Which is why him coming to you didn’t feel like a bad idea.

The sound of the door of your apartment opening didn’t sink in, neither did the footsteps or the worried “oh, hi Sergio, where’s your mom, huh?”, until you heard the door to the bathroom creak. You looked toward your door as it opened next, revealing a Travis with wide, concerned eyes. As soon as he saw you, he let out a breath and rushed in, sitting next to you on the edge of your mattress.

“Hey, Angel… you’re okay. I’m right here. You’re safe.” Your shoulders lowered the slightest bit at the sight of him. You weren’t alone anymore.

“I can’t breathe, Trav. oh god…” You had trouble stilling your eyes, but at least they were on him. That’s good, he thought. He took in how gone you looked, how your gaze seemed almost hazed over, how your body shook but you didn’t even seem to realize it.

A conversation you’d had over the phone maybe a month into your chatting popped into his head. Pressure. You had mentioned how pressure and weight could help when your attacks got really bad.

Without hesitation, he shifted closer to you, his thigh now covering your feet. “Come here.”

It’s not his words that made you move, but the way his arm lifted in an invitation. You moved from being tucked into a ball against your headboard to sitting beside him, and he immediately wrapped his arms around you, squeezing so you’d feel the pressure without it being uncomfortable.

It felt odd at first. You were still so far away inside your head that the sudden feeling of being surrounded and almost crushed was jarring – distracting – exactly what you needed to pull your attention outside of yourself and how you felt.

“I got you.”

“I’m right here.”

“You’re okay.”

Your arms wrapped around his torso after a minute – he could feel your limbs shaking against him and it tugged at his heart – before you buried your face in his chest. He kept you tight against him as he cradled the back of your head.

With the new-found ability to ground yourself, you started being able to do your usual tricks. You tilted your head and looked around for things you could see. “Computer. Bed. Travis…” You mumbled under your breath.

A soft smile pulled at his lips as he heard you, nodding along with you. “Yeah, that’s good. Keep going.”

Your breathing wasn’t as strenuous as you managed to keep speaking, “The comforter. You-your hoodie. The rug… under my feet.” Your hands flexed on his back, fingers splaying as you felt the strong muscles under the fabric and skin and slight layer of fat.

“Mhm, that’s right. Doin’ so good, Angel.” His nose tucked itself into your hair as he inhaled. “What else?”

You swallowed thickly, your throat dry from the panic slowly starting to leave your body. “The – um… the candle. Y-your soap.”

He nodded again, his head pulling back to look down at you without letting you go. You looked up at him, eyes steadier as you focused on his. Your limbs weren’t shaking anymore, but you still felt a faint buzzing sensation inside your ribcage.

I’m home. With someone I trust. I’m okay.

“See? You’re all okay.” The softness of his statement eased you even more, and you slumped against him, the inevitable exhaustion that came after attacks like this one catching up to you.

You nodded, eyes slightly teary. “T-thank you for coming.”

He hummed as he kept holding you and stroking your back, feeling the fear drain out of you. “Don’t have to thank me.”

“I just… I’m sorry, it’s really not that I don’t want to-“

He cut you off gently. “Hey, we don’t have to talk about that now.” He lowered his voice. “You should get some rest.”

You simply nodded, your shoulders dropping, but you didn’t move away – you rested your head against his shoulder again. You wanted more of it. Of him. Of his smell and of how soft yet strong he felt against you. Of his care.

Your hands clenched into his shirt. “C-can you stay here?”

His brows furrowed as he pulled back to look at you. He hadn’t expected that. “You want me to?”

“Yeah… don’t wanna be alone.” Your eyelids were starting to droop, your cheeks red from hyperventilating just a few minutes earlier.

He nodded, unable to deny you anything in this state, his head tilting as he looked at you. “Okay. I can stay on the couch.”

You let out a huff, your lips tugging into a smile for the first time since he’d arrived. “I meant… here.” You gestured to the bed with your head.

He chuckled nervously as his eyes widened. He wasn’t sure this was a good idea – you were kind of emotionally compromised, and you hadn’t talked about the whole ‘I’m not sure it ever was really casual’ bombshell he’d dropped on you and that had sent you in that state – but he couldn’t bring himself to argue with you.

“Y-yeah, okay. Let me uh… get you some water first.” He quickly got up and left toward your kitchen. Travis searched through your cupboards for a glass, which he then filled with cold tap water. When he got back to your room, you had slipped under the covers, the empty side of the bed still open for him. He willed himself to keep walking towards you, because if he’d have stopped, he would have spent way too long staring.

“Here.” His fingers brushed yours when he handed you the cup.

“Thanks,” you said, proceeding to basically inhale the whole glass before resting it on your nightstand.

He chuckled as he looked at you and rounded the bed. He blew off the candle on his way, and when he reached the other side, he took off his hoodie before sliding under the blankets. He laid on his back, respectful of your space, as his arm hooked behind his head.

You turned on your side toward him, resting your cheek on your hand.

For a while, you both didn’t say anything. Anytime you tried to rest your eyes though, the buzzing sensation inside you grew, like the lingering adrenaline could still be reactivated.

“Travis?”

“Yeah?” He turned his head to look at you.

“Could you… just talk? About whatever.”

His eyes searched your face, and he understood the request without further explanation. You still needed something else to focus on. “’Course.” He looked around your room and revved up his usual chatty self. “Um… I really like the whole set up of your room. S’real cozy, y’know? Like, I love these little lights you put up, they’re like…” He searched his mind for the word he was looking for. He snapped his fingers. “Ethereal and shit. Like a fairy or like, Arwen could live here. And the art you got is real nice…”

He kept describing what he liked about your room decor, and then he moved on to talking about his last shift, and then about work in general. It gave you something to focus on – the smooth sound of his voice, his little drawl you still couldn’t place but found so endearing, the outpouring of details no one truly needed when listening to a story but you were dying for – and it lulled you to sleep in no time, successfully making you forget about the residual anxiety coursing through your veins.

He felt the moment your body grew slack, your breathing slowing and deepening. He looked over, but he didn’t stop talking, at least not for a while until he was certain you wouldn’t wake up. And then, he let himself get pulled under to. He had been supposed to catch up on some sleep in the first place, after all.

****

The morning came with the quiet certainty that it always does come, even after the longest and most arduous of nights. It was still quite early, probably around 6 AM, when you first realized how warm you were. You didn’t open your eyes, didn’t even really understand you were awake, you just knew you were hot.

The soft light spilling from your window through your curtains warmed the air and your comforter where it fell, little dust particles floating in the passing rays. Oh, you could see the orange glow through your eyelids, feel the sun on your skin. That’s probably why you were so warm.

Wait, on your skin?

You opened your eyes and realized what had happened in an instant.

You had shifted in your sleep. Your head was resting on Travis’ chest as it raised up and down with his breathing, your body pressed to his side, his arm looped around you and keeping you against him, your leg bent and draping over his left one and secured between his legs. You had tossed the covers off of you in your sleep, probably because Travis was a literal furnace under you. But the worst of it – or the best, you hadn’t decided yet – was that your hand that wasn’t tucked under you had found its way on his stomach, right under his belly button, where his shirt had ridden up, exposing a band of skin and a happy trail that was honestly sin.

Your eyes immediately locked on it, sleepiness quickly replaced by a heated ache low in your belly – as if you needed to get even warmer – making you feel like your body was lighting up.

You didn’t move.

You couldn’t, even if you should have. 

Instead, you leaned into it. Your gaze roamed over him, tilting your head slowly so as not to wake him. You looked at the hand that was holding your waist, how big and capable it looked, before carefully tipping your head back to observe his arm that was still hooked behind his head, tattoos marring the skin, his bicep straining against the cuff of his white t-shirt, the slightest bit of hair escaping it from his armpit. Your gaze then landed further up on his neck, on the freckles and moles adorning it, until you noticed the small silver hoops adorning his earlobes. You wondered how all of it tasted. Freak. And then you looked at his face – the slight furrow of his brow, his gorgeous eyelashes resting against his cheekbones, his plush pink lips, the stubble on his jaw and over his top lip, the sideburns that were slightly longer than what you’d usually prefer but for some reason, had the fire inside you burn hotter.

You shifted your hips slightly, the desire clouding your judgment, as your fingers curled and scratched lightly through his happy trail.

Travis hummed, one of his legs bending up and pulling your attention down to his sweatpants.

Fuck.

Yeah, you’re no better than a man.

His crotch was obscenely tented, his morning wood straining against the fabric like it ached to be noticed. All the while, Travis was blissfully unaware and still sleeping. Your lips parted as a breath escaped them, eyes wide and pupils blown. Against your will, your hips rolled into him again and gave you the slightest bit of friction where you needed it against his thigh. The whimper that came out of you made him stir.

He cleared his throat.

His arm behind his head left the spot to rub at his face.

And then, his eyes opened, immediately finding you looking up at him – hair messy, cheeks red, lips parted, eyes almost pleading. Your hand was still caressing his tummy, playing with the brown wisps, like you couldn’t bring yourself to stop.

“Morning,” you said softly, your gaze still roaming over his face.

He blinked a few times, eyebrows furrowing, like he was trying to figure out if this was a dream his own psyche concocted. “Uh… Hi.”

His hand pressed against your lower back unconsciously, fingers curling slightly against the sliver of skin that was exposed. He cleared his throat again, looking down at your lips. “You… are you okay?” He asked tentatively, like a wary dog slowly inching toward a hand it’s deathly scared of but desperately wants pets from.

“Yeah. I feel better than last night. Thanks to you.” A small, shy smile graced your face. He wasn’t pulling away. He wasn’t trying to get you off him. You felt a flutter in your stomach.

He grinned back, eyes still a little droopy from sleep. “I’m glad.”

You stopped your movements on his tummy, suddenly remembering the unresolved tension. You swallowed thickly, the pit of arousal in your lower belly making you braver than yesterday. You still wanted him, that’s for sure.

“Trav, I… I wanted to say yesterday that I still think about you like that too. A lot.” You felt the flush spreading on your face and your neck. “It’s just a lot more real now, y’know? But…” You shifted even closer, pressing yourself against him even more. “We could keep doing stuff… if you want to.”

His breath hitched, pupils blowing wide as he looked down at your shifting hips. That is also when he realized how crazy his erection looked, making him feel shy. “Y-you’re sure? I get it if you’d rather stay normal friends-“

“I’m sure. I want you, Trav…” You resumed stroking his happy trail, and it sent a full body shiver through him, punching a whimper out through his gorgeous lips.

“Fuck, I want you too.” He said, slipping his hand under your shirt to caress the skin of your lower back and waist, getting lost in the feeling of finally having you against him in the way he had been dreaming about. But then his hand stopped. He gulped, his voice wavering slightly as he resumed talking. “I uh…”

You stopped your movements as well to listen to him intently, afraid to have crossed a line.

“I haven’t done anythin’ with someone since before goin’ to jail. And never sober, like I’ve told you before. So I’m kinda nervous, y’know? So, can we… take it slow? God, that sounds lame, but um….” His thumb stroked your overheated skin, your eyes softening as you looked at how vulnerable he looked.

“Of course, Trav. We don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do. I mean, I expect the same for me, too.” You said with a soft smile.

He nodded. “Yeah, of course. And uh…” He avoided your gaze to ask another question. “Can we… kiss? Or is that weird for friends?”

You chuckled, the buzzing inside you mixing up a cocktail of anxiety and lust and endearment. “I don’t think it’s weird.”

He looked at you then, his eyes dark with gentle flecks of golden light, taking in your features. They finally locked on your lips – pink and slightly chapped from being too warm all night. “Oh, thank god.”

He lifted his head from the pillow to press a testing first kiss on your mouth. You answered by moving your lips against his soft ones, following his movements as your hand came up to rest on his chest, fingers splaying, feeling the hair under his thin white shirt. He pulled back enough to talk, the tip of his nose grazing yours as he cupped your cheek. “Been wantin’ to do that for a long time… B‘fore I knew what you looked like.”

The look in his eyes – open, wanting, trusting – it gave you more confidence than you were prepared for. “Then you should keep doing it.”

He smirked and tilted his head toward you again, kissing you deeper. His lips parted against yours, coaxing you to open as well, his tongue delving inside and stealing his precious first taste of you. He hummed as if he was savoring his favorite meal.

You moved together perfectly – your leg rose higher to cover over his hip, feeling his erection against the inside of your thigh, your hips starting a slow grind. His arm around you pulled you even closer, triggering you to bite lightly on his lower lip as your head pulled back.

His breath shook slightly, eyes closed, as his hips bucked up, creating friction for his achingly hard cock against the plush give of your thigh.

Your hand moved up into the hair at the base of his skull, making him open his eyes to look at you. You could tell he felt slightly overwhelmed. “We could just do hands stuff today, just to start?” You propose, not wanting to make him jump into something big he hasn’t fully thought about.

His brows furrowed slightly, his hips still raising faintly as his hand left your cheek to grab your thigh. He swallowed thickly. “J-just hands stuff?” his voice sounded a little small, almost disappointed.

“Y-yeah, or we don’t have to do anything today,” you added, really removing any pressure he might have felt.

He shook his head immediately, his voice dropping in a lower register but still so considerate. “N-no, it’s good. I just… kinda really wanted to taste you. Thought maybe mouth stuff could be okay, too?”

A sharp spike of arousal stabbed through you at his words, sending heat flowing between your legs. You nodded before diving back in and kissing him again, this time letting your tongue do the exploring.

He groaned, grabbing your thigh harder and pressing it against his pelvis. It lasted not even a minute before he propped himself up, making you lay on your back so he could press his body on top of yours, settling between your legs.

His lips strayed from yours to leave open-mouthed kisses down your jaw, and then your neck. “Fuck, Angel… can’t believe you’re under me like this.” His hand slid under your sleep shirt, making it raise and exposing your belly to him. He pulled back enough to look into your eyes. “Can I take it off?”

You bit your lower lip, smirking up at him. You sat up just so he could take it off you in one swift move, before his hand pressed on your stomach to get you to lay back down. He didn’t follow you though.

He stayed sat back on his knees, looking down at you and drinking you in. His lips were parted, his eyes blown with lust but still impossibly soft, like a puppy after a long day playing outside. “Sweetheart.” His hands caressed up your parted thighs until they reached your waist, squeezing your flesh reverently.

He was transfixed, and it made you almost feel weird at first. He wasn’t talking as much as you thought he would be, and it made you fear that meant he was too in his head.

The reality was, Travis was simply speechless. He cared about you so strongly, and there you were, trusting him to see you fully and take care of you. Additionally, he wasn’t drunk. And he hadn’t been with someone in so long, since before going to jail – not that he thought it really mattered because he was positive you were the most beautiful woman he had ever seen and he’d still have felt nervous either way. He had to actively remind himself it was just casual.

He shook his head slightly, physically willing himself back into the moment. That seemed to get him to talk. “You’re so beautiful, y’know that? Like… god, look at you. Can I touch you? Please?”

A breath of relief left you. “Mhm. Touch me, Trav.”

He groaned softly as his large and veiny hands finally found your breasts, squeezing the globes of flesh. “Fuck. You’re so soft. Oh my god, these are the best tits- sorry, breasts- uh” He frowned, his gaze locked on how your nipples came closer together with his movements, his lips slightly parted around small, aroused breaths.

You chuckled breathily, hips shifting to try and get some friction but to no avail. “You can call them tits, Travis.”

He nodded as he kept complimenting you. “Best fucking tits I’ve ever seen, I swear to god. Angel, you’re so beautiful. Look at you. Better than anythin’ I could have imagined.”

Before you could think, he had ducked down and taken your left nipple into his mouth. He hummed, grinding his hard-on against your inner thigh as his tongue circled the peak, his hands still squeezing at the flesh.

“Fuck, Trav… that feels good…” Your back arched into him as he pulled back from your tit with a pop, shifting his attention to the other one to lavish attention to it. Your hands came up and tangled in his bleached locks, holding him against you, and he moaned at the feeling, the sound reverberating through your ribcage.

He was positive this was the most he had ever felt.

Once he was satisfied and you were a writhing mess under him, feeling your arousal stick uncomfortably to your underwear, he started planting kisses down your stomach until his trembling fingers hooked into your sleep shorts and underwear. “I gotta taste you, sweetheart. Will you let me?”

You nodded eagerly, lifting your hips to help him in his endeavour of getting you bare. He slid the offensive fabric off you and tossed it on the floor approximately where he had tossed your shirt.

Your thighs closed together on instinct, trying to shield yourself from his gaze, but his hands gently coaxed them apart as he looked at your face for any sign that you wanted to stop. “Don’t hide from me. You’re so beautiful, there’s absolutely no need to hide, baby.” His eyes then traveled down your body until they zeroed in on your core. His breath stopped for a second.

You were dripping. Your folds, slightly puffy and red from your arousal, glistened in the early morning light filtering through your curtains. The hair on your mound looked like it’d be pleasant against his cheekbones. But what also hit him then was how steady everything was – his head wasn’t fuzzy from an alcohol-induced buzz he regretted, his eyes could focus on you and see you underneath him, his senses were sharp and almost felt heightened instead of dulled.

“Angel… you’re literally that. A goddamn angel. So fuckin’ pretty-“ He cut himself off by laying down on his stomach, ready to dive right in. But as he did, you simultaneously shifted your hips up to resituate your self, making your mound accidentally collide with his nose, strong enough that he felt your pubic bone bang against the bridge of it. He instinctively pulled his head back, scrunching his features as a dull ache radiated through his face.

You gasped and tensed up, cheeks flushing in embarrassment. “Oh my god, Travis! I’m so sorry!”

He pulled his top lip down, stretching his nose to check the pain. It hurt, but not too bad. Not broken. Good. And then he started giggling, his eyes finding yours.

The sight made you relax that he hadn’t hurt himself too bad, and a bright laugh escaped your chest as well.

He kept laughing, resting his cheek against your inner thigh. “Oh, Angel… tryin’ t’kill me before I even get my fill, huh?”

Your laugh fizzled out in soft giggles, your hand carding through his hair as you looked down at him fondly. “M’sorry, trav.”

He shook his head gently, pressing a sweet kiss to your plush skin. “Don’t be. Maybe I was a little too eager. Not your fault. Plus, it didn’t hurt that bad. See?”

Before you could register his words, his nose started tracing your folds. Some of your slick gathered on the tip of it as he nudged your clit with it, inhaling the scent – the one he already knew he loved after getting a snippet of it when you had accidentally crashed together just a few seconds earlier.

You whimpered softly, the amusement of the whole situation quickly making way to your growing arousal.

From his spot between your legs, he licked one long stripe up your slit, gathering your wetness on his tongue before swirling it around your clit. He groaned at the taste, his eyes rolling back before they fixed on your face. Your head was thrown back, moans escaping your lips with every flick and press of his tongue against your bundle of nerves.

He pulled back just enough to talk. “Not only do you have the best – fuck – the best tits I’ve ever seen, your pussy’s fucking delicious too. Fuckin’ spoilin’ me, I swear.”

“Trav- oh!” His mouth was back on you, his tongue lazily licking at your core, dipping down to plunge shallowly into your entrance, his nose stroking your clit, then back up. Your hand tangled in his hair, keeping him against you as you started to buck your hips against his pretty face, making him groan against your pussy.

He spoke into you, the sound muffled but still intelligible, the vibrations heightening the feeling of his tongue and whole face on you. “Mhmm? Feels good, baby? Use me like that, mmph… yeah…”

You could feel the familiar knot starting to wind tighter and tighter in your lower belly, your abundant slick dripping down to your back side, your whimpers and moans growing desperate. “T-Travis… more, please…”

“Y-yeah? Want my fingers, sweet thing? S’that it?” He said after pulling back, letting some slick-mixed spit dribble onto his fingers. He started circling around your hole, his eyes jumping from your weeping pussy to your pleading eyes.

You nodded, almost letting out a choked cry. “Mhmmm… please.” God, you didn’t recognize yourself. You felt so needy, so empty.

He didn’t make you wait for it – two long and thick fingers pressed inside you, stretching you in a way that made you dizzy. Your back arched, hips bucking to take him deeper, a sinful moan leaving your mouth.

He jumped right back into action, latching onto your clit and sucking it between his lips as his fingers grinded into you. You pulled on his hair tightly, making his nose bury into your hairy mound as you rode his fingers and mouth. The coil finally snapped as you felt the rumble of his groan against your clit, your orgasm shattering through your body as you let out a loud sob. You rolled your hips against his face as you rode it out, his fingers slowing gently to let you feel every wave fully.

Once he stopped feeling the rhythmic clenching of your walls, he removed his fingers and pressed soft, almost apologetic kisses to your left labia and the crease where your thigh met your hip. Your legs slumped back down on the mattress, your hand covering your stomach as you caught your breath.

He looked up at you then.

Body slightly shiny in places from sweat, your soft and satisfied eyes, your mussed hair. Gorgeous.

“Thank you, Angel. That was… wow. I don’t think I’ve ever felt that. You’re… incredible.” He pressed pecks over your hipbone as he crawled up over your body, peppering your skin with totally-casual-kisses along the way. “So beautiful. Don’t deserve this.” He was talking to himself more than he was to you.

Once he reached your face, you fisted your hands into his shirt and brought him down to kiss him. Your tongue dove inside his mouth eagerly, desperate to taste the pleasure he had given you just a few moments earlier.

He hummed into it, his hips lowering between your legs.

“I think it’s time for me to repay the favor, yeah?” You looked up, biting your lower lip as you pushed at his chest to try and get the control back.

He sat back on his knees, watching you as you sat up and reached for the hem of his shirt, pulling up. “You don’t have to, sweetheart-“

“But I want to.” You paused once his shirt was up to his pecs, looking at him with a questioning expression, silently asking for permission.

“Shit, yeah, okay. Won’t say no to that,” he said as he raised his arms and let you pull off his shirt completely, tossing it to the floor, exposing his chest to you for the first time.

He had so many freckles and moles, beautifully spanning the expanse of his torso. His chest looked strong under the thin layer of skin and fat, the shape of his pecs making you want to run your hands all over him. Even worse was the hair covering them, and then reaching lower and lower into that happy trail you were getting familiar with, over his soft tummy. You could make out a few more tattoos on his belly – symmetrical flowers on each side of it – and it made your mouth water.

You shifted closer on your knees, your hands splaying over his chest and feeling the gentle strength of him. His breath stuttered as he looked at your face, how mesmerized you were by his body. “Your hands are so soft. I love it when you touch me like that.”

You smiled and kissed him, before trailing lower and pressing your palm against his hard cock through his sweatpants. “Yeah, Travy? S’this all for me?”

He nodded and hummed. “Yeah. All for you, Angel. You can do whatever you damn want with it.” He grinned, leaning into his playful side as he grabbed onto your hips, pulling you just a bit closer to nip at your neck.

You tilted your head back, giving him better access as you stroked his clothed cock. Your hand wrapping around him made you moan – he was impossibly thick, and definitely longer than average. “Sit on the edge of the bed,” you commanded swiftly, reaching around to lightly tap his ass.

“Oh. Yes, ma’am.” He smirked and obeyed, shifting to sit down as you grabbed a pillow and threw it on the ground to make it more comfortable for yourself. You kneeled in front of him, grabbing the waistbands of his pants and underwear and pulling down once he had raised his hips enough to do so. You freed him completely of the clothes, the fabric catching momentarily on his feet and making you curse under your breath.

Once you finally looked back up at him, the sight nearly broke your brain.

He was leaning back, hands propped behind him, lips curled into a grin that looked like he was actively refraining from talking. His thighs were spread to accommodate you between them, his cock resting pretty against his tummy. It looked almost swollen, big and painfully hard, reddened at the tip, a bead of precum rolling down the underside of it. You noticed how the stems of the flower tattoos on his stomach reached down to tangle gracefully right above his groin, partially hidden by the trimmed bush of hair there. But what really threw your mind for a loop was the dark, inky ring around the base of his dick. It was precise, delicate. Not scratchy like the ones on his arm and neck. It made heat pool low between your legs again.

“Fuck, Trav… you’re-“ You meant to sound playful, but the words died on your tongue. “You’re huge.”

He chuckled softly, his cheeks flushing. “Nothin’ too crazy. I’m sure you can manage.”

Your eyes widened slightly, your fingers immediately wrapping around his velvety shaft and giving an experimental stroke.

He groaned, locking his eyes with yours. “Fuck, Angel… just like that.”

You smirked coyly, before looking back down at the tattoo wrapped around his cock. Your free hand moved to cup his balls, your thumb smoothing down over the inked skin. “That must have hurt like a bitch.”

He giggled brightly, the last one morphing into a breathy moan. “It did. Wasn’t as bad as I thought it’d be, though. The guy who did it had real gentle hands – o-oh, baby...”

You took his tip into your mouth, twirling your tongue around it to taste the clear and salty precum leaking out of him. You hummed at the taste, repaying him the same treatment he had given you when he had been between your legs mere moments ago.

He didn’t waste time gathering your hair in a loose ponytail, keeping one hand tangled in it as the other went back behind him to keep himself propped up. He didn’t make you go deeper, didn’t force a pace on you. He just kept praising you between whimpers that turned into full-on moans. “That’s it, Angel. Oh my god… Doin’ so good for me. Look at you, sucking my cock like a fuckin’ champ, shit…”

He took a few deep breaths, squeezing his eyes shut as you took him deeper, flattening your tongue against the underside of his shaft as the tip kissed the back of your throat.

“Fuuuuck, baby. So good, holy sh- You’re like, impossible to believe right now. How are you – ungh…. Real? Best fuckin’ tits, best fuckin’ pussy, and now best – oh god – best fuckin’ mouth.”

The praise made your eyes roll back into your head, mind getting hazy with the weight of him in your mouth and the way your saliva coated him sinfully, thin ropes of it dripping down to the ground and staining the pillow you had put there. You kept stroking what you couldn’t yet fit between your lips, as the hand that was massaging his balls left its spot to find a new home between your legs. You found your core swollen and dripping, your fingers parting your folds to bury themselves inside you.

You moaned around him, bobbing your head up and trying to go further down with each pass. His grip tightened in your hair as he saw you touch yourself at the same time, a fresh wave of pleasure shooting up through his spine. “Fuck, are you touchin’ yourself, Angel? Holy fuck, that’s so hot. Oh my god, baby… Gonna make me come

 if you keep that up.”

You let out a pitiful whine around his cock, bucking your hips against your hand, grinding your palm into your clit as you kept fingering yourself. You removed your hand from his shaft, holding his thigh, as you took him as deep as you could, your lips reaching the dark ring around his base as your nose brushed his pubic hair. You felt his tip reach far down your throat, almost blocking off all of your air while his hips kicked against his will.

He moaned loudly, letting out little ah-ah-ah’s as you slightly bobbed your head, making his tip rub deliciously against the constricting walls of your throat. “Gonna come, Angel…” He tried to pull you off him, but you wouldn’t have it. You kept your ground, determined to make him finish inside your mouth.

“Fuck, fuck!” His hips bucked again, his release shooting straight down your throat as you moaned at the feeling, your own orgasm hitting you and pushing your fingers out of your pussy, making them draw it out by rubbing circles on your sensitive clit.

You pulled back slightly, making the last few spurts coat your tongue as you twirled it around his tip, your hand pumping the last few jolts of pleasure out of him. You swallowed everything he gave you, pulling back with a satisfied and dazed grin as you looked up at him.

His chest was flushed from exertion, going up and down quickly while he tried to come back down from his high. Your hands smoothed down his thighs to ground him.

“Still with me, Trav?” You asked, shifting to the left to sit down and rest your chin on his knee.

“Y-yeah, god… You just, sucked the life out of me. Damn, I’m…” A chuckle escaped him as he cupped your cheek, his thumb brushing just under your eye. “Thank you.”

You giggled sweetly, turning to press a gentle kiss to his palm. “Don’t have to thank me. I got plenty myself before.”

He shook his head as he reached down and softly grabbed your upper arms, coaxing you to lay beside him on the bed. He splayed one hand over your belly – a soothing touch, not sexual – as he laid on his side, facing you. “Still. This was… really amazing. Thank you for lettin’ me have that.”

Your expression softened, realizing just how much having an experience like that – sober, trusting, caring – meant for him, even if it was just as friends. “It was my pleasure, Trav,” you said softly, thank you for trusting me implied in the way you looked at him then.

He leaned in and pressed a whisper of a kiss to your cheek, making your insides twist with what dangerously felt life affection, but you ignored it. You let your eyes close and soaked into his touch, sliding a bit closer to him until his mouth pressed against your shoulder.

You both stayed like that for a few minutes, until Travis reluctantly had to leave.

****

Oh boy.

You were not prepared for the way having that real-life experience with him opened up a world of fun that now felt tame in comparison to having your mouths on each other.

The next weeks after it, the horny phone calls picked back up again. Of course, you were still having regular, totally chill phone or video calls, too. But you seemed to get turned on increasingly, if not every day you two talked.

There was also the issue of your conflicting schedules, making it harder to find times in the weeks after where you could meet up and it be worth your while. If he had a night off, you were being asked to do a double shift by your boss, and if you had a day off, he was in between shifts and needed to sleep. Calling was easier.

You had called him one time when he got into work and you were winding down for the night, breathily asking him to talk you through it as you pressed your vibrator to your clit.

He spoke in a hushed voice, making sure that if someone entered the facility, he’d hear them before they’d hear him. “There you go, Angel. Imagine it’s me holdin’ it against you.”

“Bet you’re so fuckin’ wet right now, huh? Fuck, I wish I could feel it. I do believe I’d lose my fuckin’ mind.”

“Got me so stupidly hard at work and can’t do nothin’ about it. You like that, huh? Such a tease.”

It was better than any ‘not safe for work’ audio you used to play to get yourself off before him.

One Tuesday morning, you woke up too early and lazily went through your morning routine, not having to go into work since it was your day off. As you reached the open area composed of your kitchen and living room to start making yourself a coffee, you saw Sergio curled up on his bed next to the window, the early-morning sun falling down on him and undoubtedly warming his black and white fur. He looked so cute that you grabbed your phone to take a picture.

You then saw the time. It was earlier than when you’d usually wake up, especially on a day you didn’t work. It was also about the time Travis would be arriving to his place after his graveyard shift.

You quickly pressed the little camera icon next to his name.

The video call connected after a few rings, Travis’ bright smile greeting you as he plopped down on his couch. “Hey, Angel. You’re up early.”

You nodded and smiled back before speaking in a whisper so as not to startle Sergio before you could show him to Travis. “Mhm. Look at this big boy.”

You switched camera on your phone and pointed it at your cat – the sun rays almost seemed to make his glorious and probably freshly-licked fur glow from within.

Travis’ eyes creased at the corner when he saw Sergio, a big grin spreading on his face. “Oh my god, he’s so adorable,” he said in a hush tone, matching your own.

You captured a few more angles for him as he kept praising your pet, Sergio rolling on his back at some point and exposing is slightly round belly as if he was royalty. You giggled, finally switching camera again to grant Travis the sight of your face. “Such a lazy bean, he’s being.”

Travis hummed in agreement and scratched his belly before tucking his arm behind his head, still looking at you through the screen. “So… what’s got you up this early?”

You shrugged, stepping back into your kitchen and propping your phone against your container of flour to start making yourself a coffee. You reached for a cup in your cupboard as you answered him. “Dunno. Just woke up and I wasn’t sleepy anymore. How was work?”

“Heh, it was alright. No storage emergency. Although there was this guy that came in completely drenched in sweat, teeth kinda clackin’, and desperate to get into his unit. That was kinda bizarre.”

You giggled as your coffee machine roared to life, glancing back at your phone to check on him. “Sounds like drugs, or something-“

Mistake.

He had made his way to his bathroom, letting the phone film him from the counter as he stripped his shirt off to start his getting-home routine. He didn’t waste time taking off his pants either, leaving him in just his underwear as he looked at himself in the mirror, grabbing his jaw and turning his head as if analyzing if he needed to shave or if he could get away with on more day of beard growth. “Yeah, maybe. Don’t really care. I do not wanna get involved in shit like that.”

Heat aggressively rushed between your legs, your brain pavloved now into associating Travis and his body to mind blowing orgasms. You stared at him openly, not really registering when your coffee finished dripping. “That’s unfair,” you spoke before thinking.

Travis’ eyes left his reflection and focused on you on his cellphone’s screen, a tiny smirk pulling at his lips. “Oh? What is?”

You huffed and picked up your phone, mustering your best unimpressed expression even though seeing him like that always made you feral. “You walkin’ around in just your underwear. You’re so slutty, I swear,” you said with a joking gleam in your eye, chuckling to yourself.

Travis laughed and cocked out his hip, crossing his arms over his chest and making his biceps swell enticingly. “Slutty, huh? I think you’re projectin’, Angel.”

You gave him a mock-offended look. “Projecting what?”

He smirked, resting his hands on his bathroom counter and leaning forward closer to his phone. You could see all the little moles seasoning his chest as the position basically gave him male cleavage you could drool for. “Your little horny thoughts.”

You gasped sarcastically, but damn if you didn’t just get called out. You walked back to your room, completely forgetting your coffee, closing the door behind you. “Let’s say that I am. What would you do about it?”

He chuckled and let his head hang as if you were being a nuisance, even though he absolutely loved it, before looking back at you through the screen. “I’d tell you to go into that little drawer of yours and pull out somethin’ that makes you think of me.”

You giggled shyly, sitting on your bed with a soft bounce and placing your phone on your nightstand to keep filming you. You opened your bedside drawer, going through your modest but still substantial collection of toys – you were pretty lonely before Travis – before settling on the largest dildo in your arsenal. Your fingers skimmed over the head, thinking back to when you had felt Travis in your hand. This was the closest you had to him.

You pulled it out, along with your bottle of lube, before showing it to him on screen. Your cheeks were flushed crimson, still feeling a little shy even though you had been intimate many times before. Something about showing him this part of you felt a bit more intense. You wanted to, though.

“I think I’d go with this one,” you said softly while you watched him settle back on his bed.

“And why that one, Babygirl?” His smooth voice reached your ears and made your thighs press together.

“It’s – uh… it’s big, like you. And I’ve been… thinking about it.”

His expression softened slightly, even if his pupils looked completely overtaken by a lustful haze. “Thinkin’ ‘bout what?”

Scooting backward until you laid back in the middle of your bed, angled toward your camera with some pillows for your head, you answered shyly. “How you’d feel inside me? All of you?”

His jaw clenched, eyes shutting as a ragged groan left his chest. “Fuck, Angel… can’t stop thinkin’ about that either. Wanna show me how good it makes you feel when you dream about my cock inside you?”

You whimpered and nodded, arousal clouding your judgment as your hands pushed down your shorts and panties. Your fingers found your core soaking wet, drawing circles slowly and applying maddening pressure to your clit.

You heard shuffling from his end, and even though you couldn’t see because the camera was on his face and your head was thrown back and far away from your phone, you knew he was taking his boxers off. “There you go, baby. You look so good. Wanna show me those perfect tits too, yeah? So fuckin’ wet for me. Just for me, right?” He was getting a bit more possessive as time went on, but you found that you didn’t mind it.

“Yes. Trav. Only f-for you.” You pushed up your shirt to your armpits to reveal your breasts, before reaching for the dildo on the bed, bringing it up to your face to inspect it, and it made you giggle.

Travis smiled as he saw you laugh, his eyebrows furrowed in amused confusion, his jerking motion over his achingly hard dick slowing. “What’s so funny, sweetheart?”

You pointed to the base of the dildo before extending your hand for the lube. “It can’t really be you. No tattoo, see?”

He let out a breath through his nose, his head shaking softly at your observation. “Guess you’re right about that. I do believe it is neon pink, too.”

You chuckled even more, before uncapping the lube and letting a thick glob fall on the head of the toy. You looked at Travis’ face on your phone as you wrapped your hand around the silicone dick, twisting your wrist at the head and smearing the lube over the length with your downward strokes, just like you’d do with him and his precum. “Allow me to think you don’t really care about that.”

He bit his lower lip, his hand mimicking your movements on his own very real and painfully hard cock. “Fuck, sweetheart… you’re right, I definitely don’t.” He didn’t know whether to keep looking at your hands working on the dildo or at your glistening yet neglected pussy. “You look fuckin’ perfect, I swear…”

At his praise, you let out a soft whine and smeared the excess of lube on your hand over your pussy, broadly circling your flesh as you adjusted your grip on the base of the dildo. You brought the tip of it close to your entrance, pushing it in slightly. It was already a stretch, not having prepped yourself before. “Oh, Travis…”

He hummed in reassurance, his gaze transfixed on you. “Go slow, Angel. Just relax and try to let me in, yeah? Doin’ so good for me, look at you.”

You moaned loudly as you pushed a few more inches of the pink toy inside, your free hand circling your clit soothingly and allowing you to relax and take more in. “So big, Trav.”

He choked on a groan, knowing that he was probably slightly bigger than the fake cock spearing you right now, which wasn’t helping his sinful picturing of ‘getting to fuck you for the first time’. “I know, baby. But I also know y’can do it. Just a little more?”

You nodded, before pushing the rest of the dildo inside you, leaving maybe an inch or so to still be able to hold onto it. You mewled at the fullness, hips shifting slightly as you got used to the stretch of your walls.

“Fuck, there you go. So full for me,” he praised, stroking his cock slowly. “Wanna see me, sugar?”

You whined and pulled the pink toy halfway out of you, before shoving it back in, earning a deep moan from within your chest. “You’re too – unh – tiny on my screen over there. Just…. Enjoy t-the show. Oh, and keep talking.”

He chuckled before humming in agreement, mentally going through ways of how he could repay you for the vision you’re giving him now. “How do you feel, Angel? Does it feel good?”

You nodded and let your head fall back as you found a rhythm that worked, pulling out and fucking yourself over and over again with the neon pink length, circling your clit with your other hand. “So fucking good, Trav. Wish it w-was you,” you moaned out, feeling a hazy blanket slowly covering your mind, bringing forth a worriless state of pure lust.

Travis started jerking his cock faster, following your rhythm and twisting his wrist every time he got to his sensitive tip. He could see how your slick was mixing with the lube, dripping down the sides of your pussy where the dildo was splitting you open, and it made him want to run his tongue all over you and taste you again. He groaned and moaned at the thought. “Wish I was there too. You’re so fuckin’ wet for me, Angel. I can almost taste you from over here, and I bet you’d be so sweet and perfect. Wanna fuckin’ eat you again. Hell, I’d probably suck that dildo clean just so I could get all’a you.”

He was rambling, saying all the dirty thoughts that came to his mind, and it turned you on even more, which you didn’t think was possible. The mental image of Travis sucking your bright girly dildo coated in your slick weirdly did it for you, and you felt a fresh gush of arousal glaze the object in question.

You fucked yourself faster, moaning louder, applying more pressure to your bundle of nerves. The coil in your stomach was tightening at a dangerously rapid rate, but you didn’t care, not when it felt this good. “H-holy shit, Trav. I’m so close,” you said, breathless.

His voice came out wrecked, panting along with you. “Right there with you, Angel. G-gonna come so hard for you.”

The vicious thought of him being the one inside you and filling you up with his spend catapulted you over the edge, your body tensing up and releasing as waves of pleasure spread from your core to the tip of your fingers and toes. “Travis!” His name fell from your lips, coated and dripping with relief and bliss.

He came as soon as you did, thick ropes of milky white seed coating his hand and his lower belly as he whimpered your name.

You slowly pulled the toy out of your stretched and slick hole, wiping your other hand on your inner thigh – the mix of lube and arousal was getting sticky in the aftermath of it all.

When you sat up, your breathing slowing back down to normal, you noticed that Travis was still looking at you, not moving an inch. You picked up your phone, showing a clearer picture of your flushed and sweaty face to him, and you smirked at him. “Can I see you now?”

It took him a second to register what you’d asked of him, too lost looking at your beautiful, droopy eyes. His eyebrows shot up, embarrassment making him blush. “W-what? You want to see me now?”

You hummed and fell back on your bed, spent and happy. “Mhm. Please, Trav.”

He chuckled incredulously, before giving in and turning the camera around. “Suit yourself.”

The sight almost left you breathless.

His cock was softening, but still slightly rigid as it flagged against the top of his thigh, reddened and sticky. His boxers had been pushed down barely enough to get it out, the waist band resting just under his balls. You also saw his release coating his happy trail and the few drops of it that got on the trimmed bush above his dick, the display of want feeling like a sin too good to give up.

“So pretty, Trav. You have no idea,” you praised softly, wishing you could be over there to lick him clean.

He turned the camera back on his face, his cheeks even more red than before and his eyes wide as saucers. “Can I see you soon? I’m off on Friday night again.”

The question took you by surprise, but you found yourself nodding before you could psyche yourself out. “Uh yeah, that works.”

You’re pretty sure the grin he gave you in response showed all his teeth. “Great! I was thinkin’ we could go to those escape rooms I was tellin’ you about?”

His excitement made you smile. “That sounds fun, yeah. You’ll pick me up?”

He nods, burying his fingers in his unruly hair. “Yeah, I’ll text you.”

****

You checked your reflection in the mirror so many times, adjusting your top again so it wasn’t slutty but still slightly revealing. Your jeans hugged your hips and ass just right, but it still felt like not enough.

Ugh, get it together. It’s just hanging out with Travis, your friend. Come on.

But was it?

A knock at your door broke your spiraling. You made your way to your entryway, grabbing your bag and looping it around your arm. You opened the front door to your apartment and froze for a second when you saw him.

He was wearing an opened gray button-up revealing a tight white t-shirt underneath, with black wide-leg jeans. His hair was wavy, parted in the middle messily but in a way that worked so well for him. He looked… handsome. But you were determined to keep things casual. That was what you both had agreed to and what would be best. Right?

“Hey, Trav.”

“Hey, Angel. You look great,” he said, letting his gaze take you in before reaching your face. He felt a little unsure of himself, of how he should greet you, but he settled on doing what felt right.

He stepped closer and raised his arm to wrap you in a friendly hug, your own arms circling his middle. He smelled clean, like shower gel, with a layer of a woodsy and vanilla-y scent that seemed to wrap itself around your lungs and stay there – another piece of Travis to keep deep within you.

He let go and pulled back, and the expression on his face seemed to mirror your own – a bit longing, a bit unsure – but he immediately started talking again. “So, I got the room that’s supposedly like trying to escape a mad scientist’s lab or somethin’. Thought that could be cool. The reservation is at 7, so…” He peaked at his phone and put it back in his pocket. “We should really get goin’.”

You nodded and smiled, stepping out of your apartment and into the hallway of your block before locking your door. Anyone could walk in your apartment building, but you lived in a relatively safe part of town, so it didn’t really bother you. “Let’s go! I’m sure it’ll be fun.”

You followed him out to his car, sneakily stealing glances at his ass as he was walking slightly in front of you.

“So, how are you?” He asked as he stepped up to his car and opened the passenger door for you.

“Been good, thanks,” you nodded as you got in his car and buckled your seatbelt, waiting for him to get into the driver seat to continue. “Work is picking back up again with fall so y’know, been getting a few extra shifts. But I can use the money.”

“Yeah, I bet. Is Steph still bein’ a bitch?” he looked over at you with a smirk before pulling out of the parking lot and heading toward The Puzzle Box, the place where he had booked the escape room.

You laughed at his question, delighted that he had remembered one of your coworkers that you had mentioned in passing over the phone – you usually clocked into work after her, and she always left you tasks that she could have done herself. “Yeah, I’m afraid ‘being a bitch’ is terminal for her.”

The car ride passed quickly, conversation flowing easily with a chatty Travis always ready to bounce off whatever you were talking about.

You arrived at The Puzzle Box and got out of the car, following your friend as you reached the door of the building. He held it open for you, motioning with his hand in front of his hips to let you step in. “After you, Angel.” His eyes gleamed and his head tilted ever-so-slightly in your direction as you passed and thanked him softly, making your stomach twist.

His hand grazed your lower back as you reached the front desk, but he quickly pulled it back, remembering that this. is. casual. It made you blush all the same, though.

The flamboyant woman at the desk greeted you both. “Welcome to The Puzzle Box! Do you have a reservation?”

Travis smiled and nodded. “Hi! Yeah, Travis Meacham?”

She let out an amused giggled as she looked through her computer, matching the deranged clown costume you were now realizing she was wearing. “Ah, yes! But you booked an experience that’s usually for four people… will it just be you two?”

He turned and looked sheepishly at you, realizing his mistake, before glancing back at the lady. “Uh, yeah. S’that okay?”

She laughed maniacally. “Well, it’s quite alright, but I’d say Doctor Flinch will most probably get to keep his pets tonight.”

It made you giggle, understanding that you probably wouldn’t be able to escape the room being just two, but you still wanted to do it. “No problem,” you said, poking Travis in his side and making him turn and glare at you playfully.

“Come with me!” The clown receptionist led you through a few hallways, all decorated with the various themes of the different escape rooms this place had to offer.

She stopped in front of a rusty-looking, riveted door and explained the plot of the experience and the rules vibrantly. You were already feeling the excitement bubble inside you.

“You have an hour… don’t break anything!” She finished and opened the door, shoving you both inside the room.

You giggled and turned to Travis when you finally got inside, before looking around the room. “Woah,” you both said at the same time.

The lighting in the room was dimmed, making it hard to see things clearly. But from what you could see, there were big vials filled with various gross items – feet, eyeballs, mice – that seemed to glow green from within and that casted worrisome shadows against the mildewed stone walls. There were various scientific contraptions all around, blueprints spread on a desk for equipment that looked vaguely like torture stuff, and a big metal table that looked stained with a red, viscous liquid. It was very immersive.

Travis spoke first. “Damn, this shit is insane. Look at all this stuff!”

He started walking around the room and pointing at various things, straining his eyes to see in the low lighting.

You quickly found a flashlight on the desk and clicked it on, walking over to him to peak at what he was looking at. Your shoulder pressed against his gently.

“There’s like, a bunch of numbers here. I bet it’s a puzzle or some shit.”

You both started to work together to try and solve it.

You managed to find a key under the desk that opened a hidden drawer, which contained a piece of paper with letters associated with numbers, allowing you to crack the first puzzle.

 The thing was that it had been already forty minutes when you did.

What could you say? Travis kept getting distracted by other pieces of future puzzles you had no way of solving right now, and you let him, because there was something so stupidly endearing about watching him fully lost in this world and babbling away at everything. Plus, you basically had no shot at getting out in time, so what was the harm in that?

Once you had decrypted the message, it left a riddle that was actually pretty easy to solve and that led to an inconspicuous-looking picture frame. There was a key tucked into it, which matched the look of the lock of a huge metal safe on the far wall.

“Oh my god, Trav! We can totally unlock that big thing now!” You squealed, quickly making your way to the iron box, which was taller than you.

Travis followed you with a pleased smile, happy to see you enjoying yourself as much as he was. He was holding the flashlight in one hand and rested his other on his hip when he stopped behind you. You could almost feel the warmth of his chest against your back. “Go ahead, Angel. Open it!”

You slid the rusted key into the lock, turning it slowly. It creaked and clicked satisfyingly, your heart beating rapidly from the excitement of the game, before you quickly pulled the door opened.

At the same time, Travis angled the beam of the flashlight up into the box.

Clang!

A skeleton with realistic rotting flesh still clinging to it dropped and stopped a few inches away from your face, the light perfectly illuminating it and making it the only thing you could see in the creepy room.

You shrieked loudly, jumping and accidentally banging your foot against the safe, before quickly turning around to grab onto Travis and bury your face in his chest.

Travis had also been surprised – though less intensely than you – but he was still able to wrap his arms around you. You felt his chest shake slightly from trying to suppress his laughter. “You’re okay, Angel,” he said between breaths.

You lost it.

The laughing rumbled from deep within you as you shook your head from side to side, still resting your forehead against his shoulder. Travis let himself break when he saw you were alright, making you both hunch over, wheezing and holding your bellies.

The laughter slowly dissolved into a few loose giggles after a minute, but then Travis would make eye contact with you and it would send you both into another, smaller fit of it.

By the end of it, your sides were hurting and your cheeks were wet, and you both couldn’t wipe the smiles from your faces.

“Oh, you should have seen your face, sweetheart. That shit was priceless,” he said, wiping his cheeks.

Before you could answer, a booming maniacal laugh echoed in the room. “Your time is up! Doctor Finch will see you now, HAHAHA!”

You giggled again when the clown lady opened the door to the room to come and get you out. “How much of it was left?” You asked her.

She grinned and giggled. “You finished maybe… 20% of it?”

You laughed loudly again, Travis joining in with you. “Looks like we don’t count as four people, Trav.”

He chuckled and put his hand on your lower back to guide you out, this time not retracting from it. “M’not sure we count as two, but that’s all on me,” he joked, and it made you shake your head in admonishment but also amusement – he knew you didn’t love when he put himself down, but he had explained to you that it was part of his sense of humor and he didn’t actually think he was stupid, and that made you understand.

When you got out to his car, he opened your door again, which you couldn’t help but find adorable.

The drive back to your place was filled with laughter as you both relived your spectacular failure, sharing thoughts on the experience and what you had loved about it.

“You’re like, super smart though. I swear every time you said somethin’ it ended up bein’ right and I was just the one getting’ distracted by shit that didn’t matter.” He chuckled at himself. “But like, thanks for comin’ with me. I had a lot of fun,” he said in a softer voice, turning to you as he put the car in park in front of your apartment building.

“I had a lot of fun too, Travis. I hadn’t laughed like that in… god, so long.” A smile pulled at your lips as you remembered the moment. You looked up at the window of your apartment that was visible from the lot, before glancing back to Travis. You then lowered your gaze to the dashboard. “Would you wanna come in? Like, for tea?”

He nodded eagerly. “Yeah, I’d love to.”

He followed you up into your apartment, kicking his shoes off at the door before you gestured toward the couch while you stepped into the kitchen. “Make yourself at home. Sergio’s around, somewhere.”

“Thanks,” Travis said, before walking over to your couch and sitting down on the cushion. It took five seconds before a ball of black and white fur jumped up on his lap and demanded pets. Travis giggled and obliged, granting your cat with as many scratches as he wanted. “Nice to finally meet you properly too, sir. You’re mom’s pretty cool, huh?” He whispered like a secret.

You brought over two glasses of cold water. “So, apparently I’m out of tea and in dire need of a trip to the grocery store.”

He laughed and picked up the glass, taking a small sip. “No worries, Angel. Water’s fine.”

You sat down beside him and okay, there you were.

Face to face with your friend with benefits for the first time in a few weeks. You knew you wanted it to happen, but you weren’t sure how to transition from ‘friends hanging out’ to ‘friends having sex’. This was fairly new to you.

Sergio hopped off Travis’ lap, retreating back to his bed, and it gave you an idea. “Maybe I could take his spot?”

You cringed at yourself, but you stuck with it as you saw Travis’ eyes widen before they darkened slightly. “Sure, you can.”

You shifted closer to him, but before straddling his lap and going all out, you leaned into him.

He met you halfway, pressing his lips to yours and bringing a hand up to gently cradle your neck. You expected it to turn hot and sinful quickly, like it usually did on your numerous phone calls, but it didn’t.

Travis kissed you slow at first, his thumb carefully rubbing at the articulation of your jaw as he gently licked at your lower lip. You gasped softly, opening up for him and slanting your mouth against his. But even then, he took his time exploring you and tasting you. The kiss lasted long, both of you completely lost in the daze emanating from it, your tongues massaging against each other unhurriedly, and it didn’t register in your needy brain that this maybe wasn’t your typical ‘kiss-to-start-things-off-with-your-friend-with-benefits’.

It progressed naturally with you finally straddling his lap, your hands buried in his hair as you kept kissing him. His hands were resting on your hips, not helping you move against him, just holding you close as his thumbs brushed soft circles over the denim of your jeans. He was humming every time his tongue met yours, as if he so desperately wanted to talk and tell you how amazing this was, and the vibration of it, the heat of his body under yours – just him, really – made the familiar heat that only Travis could elicit in you pool low between your spread legs.

Your hips started to buck slowly over him, pressing down on his jean-clad erection with every motion. He let out a shaky breath through his nose, sucking on your bottom lip and pulling it into his mouth, before letting it go. “Angel… you’re drivin’ me crazy, y’know that?”

He started planting kisses down the column of your throat, letting you set the pace with your movements against him.

Your breathing was already growing ragged, the slowness of the build-up making everything better while simultaneously blurring those lines between friendship and something more.

His hands moved reverently to undress you, helping you slide your top off along with your bra and take his own shirts off him. He kept praising you through it all, his mouth unable to stop itself from delivering compliments you never knew you needed.

“You smell so good, baby. Right here,” he said, burying his face in the valley of your breasts and inhaling the scent of your skin.

Before you could move on to more though, you slid off his lap and extended your hand to him. “Bedroom?”

He grinned and took your hand, standing up from the couch and readjusting his hard-on through the front of his jeans. “Lead the way.”

He followed you, watching your hips sway as you confidently – he noted, even if you were feeling anything but – walked through your hallway and into your room. The fairy lights were shining softly, casting the scene in a gentle glow that heightened everything. “Still magical and shit in here.”

You chuckled at his need to comment on it, before he grabbed your waist, his big and warms hands spreading over your skin as he kissed you again. Travis pulled you closer and you felt his erection against your lower belly, straining behind the fabric of his jeans. You felt the hair of his chest and tummy tickle your palms as you slid them down his body, the soft muscles hypnotizing you into wanting more.

You reached for the button and popped it open before undoing the zipper, the sound of the little metal teeth unhooking one after the other resonating sensually in the quiet of the room. He stepped out of his pants and helped you take yours off in the same way, before falling to his knees in front of you. “You’re so fuckin’ pretty. I’ve never seen anythin’ quite like you, Angel.”

He pulled your lacy panties down your legs, the gusset sticking slightly to your wet core, while he kept looking up at your face for any sign you might want to stop. All he found was awe as you buried your hand in his hair. He leaned in and pressed a kiss to the front of your hip, before angling his head back and jutting his chin forward, licking through your folds where he could reach.

You gasped and tightened your grip on his locks, letting him get a few more samples of your arousal before you carefully pulled him off of you. “Trav. This is great, but… I really want you inside me. Please.”

His expression softened as he gulped. He kissed your thigh and rose back up to his feet. “You sure, sweetheart? We don’t have to because of what we did on the phone-“

“I know, Travis. But please. I f-fucking need you.” Your voice was shaky, almost breathless from your yearning for him.

His head tilted, pupils blowing wide until the gorgeous hazel eyes you’ve grown to love – wait, to like – turned into pools of black and lust. He cupped your face and kissed you again, his tongue parting your lips and finding yours, letting you taste yourself on him.

You whimpered into it, falling onto your bed when the backs of your knees reached the edge, not realizing until then that he had walked you backwards toward it. He looked down at you – your hair fanning on the duvet, your soft body expanding and shrinking with your breathing, your eyes looking at him like he was everything that was missing – and it tugged at something inside him. “Angel… you’re a vision. A… a fuckin’ masterpiece, I swear. I can’t believe I met you on that shitty forum and now I get to see you like this.”

He tugged his boxers off, his cock releasing and slamming up against his soft tummy. The tip was red, leaking a bit of precum already as he gripped himself and gave a few experimental strokes on instinct. Your eyes locked on his length, on the veins meandering around it, on the tattoo at the base, and your walls clenched around nothing.

You looked back up his body, over his belly and chest that looked so stupidly comfortable to lay on, until you reached his face and eyes. You extended your hand, and he took it, pressing a gentle kiss to your knuckles before climbing on the bed on top of you. “Can’t believe it either, Trav.”

Your legs spread for him as he lowered himself between them, the underside of his cock resting against your slick folds as he caged you between his arms and kissed you again.

It seemed like he couldn’t stop himself from kissing you.

He thrusted his hips gently, his tip catching on your clit and making your whimper into his mouth. He pulled back enough to talk. “Love how you sound for me. You always sound so fuckin’ good.” He trailed kisses down your throat, over your collarbone, before wrapping his lips around your nipple and sucking it softly. “Love these tits, still the best I’ve ever seen,” he mumbled against the plush flesh, making you giggle.

He came back up and kept that same rhythm with his hips, teasing you with his cock as you soaked the underside of it, nipping and licking at your neck. It was unfair that you already felt the knot tightening between your hips. “Travis, please…”

He nodded and hummed. “I know, I know. I’ll give it to you, Angel. M’sorry I wanna worship ya so bad.”

He lifted his hips, putting enough distance between your body and his to slip one hand in the space and grab the base of his cock, aligning the ruddy tip with your dripping entrance. He pushed in slowly, not wanting to overwhelm you, even though he was met with less resistance than he had thought – the confirmation of your arousal making his head spin. “Fuck, baby…”

Your arms wrapped around his neck as he pushed in a few inches, your walls clenching and releasing around him as you whimpered at the stretch. “W-wait…”

He stopped immediately, looking into your eyes as his hand left his cock to cup your face. “You okay, sweetheart? Am I hurting you?”

You shook your head. “I’m f-fine, just…” You took a few deep breaths, willing yourself to relax.

He nodded in understanding and started peppering your face in gentle, apologetic kisses. “Doin’ so good for me. There you go, just relax. We don’t have to rush, yeah? You feel so good around me, you’ve no idea. S’fuckin’ incredible.”

His words helped you relax even more, and your legs wrapped around his waist, making him bury the remaining inches inside you. He moaned loudly, along with you, as his eyes screwed shut in pleasure. “H-holy fuck.”

He caressed your hip up and down as he kissed the side of your face, reveling in the way you allowed him in, how warm and tight and wet you felt around him. He could feel everything, sober and aware, which almost brought tears to his eyes.

He rolled his hips experimentally, and you sighed beautifully, making him repeat the motion over and over. Your slick coated his cock every time he pulled out a few inches and plunged back in, the sound of your mixed arousals echoing off the walls of your room in a pornographic yet realistic way. His chest hair kept rubbing against your perked nipples, making every sensation sharper, every ripple of pleasure full-bodied.

“We’re doing it, Angel. We’re – fuck – I’m fucking you. I’ve wanted this for so long, can’t believe you’re lettin’ me in like that. I…” His words might have been clumsy, but they were so him and full of awe, that it had you arching your back.

“Me too, Trav. Y’feel s-so good inside me.” You buried your fingers in his hair and tugged at the strands, making him pull back from your neck and kiss you with a deep groan.

“Y-yeah? Can feel you stranglin’ me, sweetheart. You close?”

“Mhm. I’m… so close.” You moaned, your hips rising to meet his thrusts that were steadily growing harder, his hand now holding your thigh to keep you opened as his other forearm was still planted next to your head.

“Shit… al-alright. That’s so fuckin’ hot. I-I got you, baby. Come on my cock.”

He looked down and groaned as he saw the milky ring of your arousal layered over top of his inky one. Noticing how your hips were chasing his, he lowered them and opted for a grinding motion, making his pelvis press against your clit, providing pressure and friction from the coarse hair there. It was exactly what you needed, and you came with a loud moan, your fingernails digging in his back as your body shook, your pussy gushing around his cock.

He moaned as if your pleasure was his, as if the electric current that was your extasy flowing inside you had traveled through to him via your skin, aided by the thin and salty sweat between you both. “Fuckin’ hell, so good. Most beautiful thing I – unh – ever seen.”

He kept slowly fucking you through the aftershocks, feeling your walls spasm around his dick as he helped you ride it out. He was so close too, needing to clench his thighs in an effort not to come, because there was now way he was only giving you one orgasm.

He paused once he felt you slump back, the haze of your pleasure slowly leaving your mind as you smoothed your hands over his chest. “Fuck, Travis… you’re good at that.” A breathy giggle left you, before you pressed your lips on his again.

He chuckled against you, feeling the tip of his ears redden at your words. “I’m glad you think so, ‘cause I ain’t done.”

He sat back on his knees and grabbed your hips, helping you turn around on your belly. He smoothed his hands down your sides, his surprisingly soft palms making goosebumps bloom on your overheated skin while he straddled your thighs. He reached your ass and squeezed it gently, getting a peak of your dripping folds and tight rim which made his cock jump. “You know, I love seeing you from the front but this is also pretty fuckin’ good.”

You let out an amused breath and playfully hit his leg with your foot, as much as you could while laying on your belly, before he grabbed one of your pillows and slipped it under your hips. He let some spit dribble onto his cock, giving himself a few pumps to spread it down his length. He then leaned over you and pressed a soft kiss to your shoulder blade, his arm resting next to your head while his dick slotted between your cheeks. “Is this okay for you?”

You hummed and nodded, pushing your hips back to give him some friction which made him whimper against your skin. “More than okay, Trav,” you said, grabbing his tricep and lifting your head to angle his forearm under your throat. He caught the hint and pulled his arm so that your neck was resting in the crook of his elbow. You turned your head enough to kiss his bicep, and he chuckled before resting his lips against the side of your face.

“You ready for me, Angel?”

You hummed and licked his skin, before settling in the gentle headlock he had you in. “Yes, Travis.”

He took a deep breath and raised his hips, making his heavy cock dip down toward your entrance while his free hand kept you open. He sank right back in, your abundant slick and his spit making it easy after he had already stretched you out. Still, it felt amazing as he immediately started to thrust his length inside you, the veiny shaft sliding against your walls.

The arm around your neck tightened slightly, helping to bring you back every time he grinded forward, making you feel both safe and used in a way that had your head spinning. A flesh-toned haze clouded your mind, moans spilling free from your lips as Travis kept fucking into you.

“Fuck, sweetheart… you feel so fuckin’ incredible like this. Takin’ me so well. I think you’re one of a kind. In fact, I – oh god – I do believe you are one of a fuckin’ kind. So wet for me, can feel you soakin’ the pillow.”

He kept talking you through it, praising you like it was his job, as the tip of his cock kept hitting that spot inside you that made you see stars. He licked and kissed at the nape of your neck and the curve where it met your shoulder, his arm holding you steady as his other hand palmed at your ass and hip.

“T-Trav…” You moaned, unable to string more words together as you felt all thoughts escape your mind except for him. The edge was getting closer, but you were missing a little something, making your hips push up as you tried to slip your hand under yourself.

He noticed and nipped at your neck, slipping his free hand under your belly before you could. “Let me get that for you, Angel.” His fingers found your clit swollen and coated in your juices, before they started circling it like he knew exactly how to play you.

He felt you clench around him, his hips stuttering before he forced himself to keep a steady pace. “Fuck, baby. Come with me, yeah? Can feel how close y’are.”

Your body tensed as his arm flexed around your throat, cutting off just enough air to make everything fuzzy and light as you came hard around him, your walls contracting in waves of blinding pleasure.

It made him follow right after, his hips grinding once, twice, before he stilled and pumped you full of his spend, undoubtedly painting your walls white. He whimpered and moaned beautifully as he came, a broken string of syllables that resembled your name against your neck, his arm relaxing and letting you breathe in air that smelled like sex and him.

His weight settled over you, his cock softening slowly and allowing some of his semen to leak back out of you around it. He slipped his arm from under your neck, pressing sweet kisses to your cheek and your temple as he slipped out of you.

You winced at the feeling, and he immediately smoothed one hand over your hair. “I know. M’sorry sweetheart. Stay right there.”

But then his eyes caught on the mess between your legs, and he couldn't help himself. He quickly parted your cheeks and dipped his tongue to taste the mix of both of your releases, humming at the taste as his eyes rolled back. Pulling away, he pressed a kiss to your lower back before walking out of your room.

You were still lost in a daze, not completely registering what he had just done, slowly coming back to when you felt yourself getting colder without his heat and heard the soft patter of bare feet heading to your bathroom.

About a minute later, Travis came back in, armed with a damp washcloth and a glass of water. He put the latter on your nightstand, before he sat next to your limp body still on your stomach. He dragged the washcloth – which was surprisingly warm – through your puffy and irritated folds and in between your thighs, cleaning you up diligently as he kept murmuring praise. “That was… I don’t even have words for it and you know me. You’re so good, Angel. So perfect.”

The scratch of the cloth and his words finally made your brain snap back into place. You turned on your side and looked up at him, letting your gaze take in the signs of past pleasure on his body, the flush on his chest and cheeks, the softness in his droopy eyes. “D’you wanna stay?”

His mouth shaped into a ‘o’, eyebrows lifting before he nodded. “Yeah, if you’ll have me.”

After tossing the washcloth away and handing you the glass of water – which disappeared quite fast – he settled back next to you. You rested your head on his chest – you were right, it was so comfortable – and his arm wrapped around you.

You stayed like that a while, in silence.

Now that the rush of sleeping together had passed, your mind quickly launched itself into thinking. Was it still casual? Had you gone too far?

You couldn’t deny it to yourself anymore. You had feelings for him. Undoubtedly so. And you didn’t think you could hide them for long. At some point he’d realize the way you looked at him wasn’t just fondness but something deeper that you couldn’t name. He’d realize how no one else seemed to catch your eye, how you only wanted him. He’d get scared. He’d leave.

Before anxiety could start clawing its way through your post-coital bliss, Travis finally spoke up.

“Angel?” His voice was small.

“Mm? Yeah?” You looked up at him.

He took a deep breath, his eyes tender as they flicked over your face and settled on yours, like he was making sure he hadn’t read anything wrong.

For a second, you thought he was about to say it. He was looking at you so softly, like you looked at him, like he found something in you just like you did in him.

“Just, uh… thank you. I really enjoyed it.”

Your heart squeezed in your chest. You had let yourself hope for a second, and it had backfired.

You blinked and forced yourself to smile, forcefully willing yourself to calm down and accept this for what it was – casual – the word that once felt like it would protect you from pain now burning and lashing your self-worth.

“Y-yeah. I enjoyed it too.” No, you loved it. You wanted more of it. More of him.

But you said nothing more, letting him succumb to slumber as you tried to as well, eventually drifting off to the rhythmic rise and fall of the chest of this man you loved under your cheek.

****

The morning came softly.

Your room was warm, still smelling faintly of sex and the woodsy vanilla scent sticking to Travis’ skin.

He had moved in the night, now laying on his belly, one leg slightly bent at the knee. You were on your side, looking toward him when your eyes fluttered open.

Everything came rushing back to you, but in a way that didn’t feel overwhelming. Your gaze was focused on the expanse of his back, littered with moles as memories of last night rushed past you like dull conversations at a packed event.

Travis was completely naked, shameless as he kept on sleeping in your bed, completely uncovered. You let yourself watch and admire, wanting to worship him like he had you. If you couldn’t be with him, at least you could have this.

His overgrown bleached waves were mussed against your pillow, his face turned away from you toward the window. You watched his back swell up and down again as he breathed easily, like there was no weight restricting it.

His skin was surprisingly tanned, a few faint scars on his back, maybe from those small fights he had gotten into against his will in prison.

Your gaze finally reached past his waist to his ass, admiring how round and supple it looked, almost making you jealous that yours wasn’t as perfect in your eyes. It had moles all over it as well – the man was practically covered in them – and it made your mouth water.

You scooted closer and started to draw patterns between the freckles you saw on his back, soaking the warmth and the softness of his skin into the tip of your fingers.

Travis hummed and stirred, leaning into your touch, giving you enough confidence to press soft kisses over his shoulder blades. Your hand trailed down and smoothed over his butt and down the side of his thigh as you pressed your front to his back.

You felt him tense and relax as he woke up to feel you against him. “Morning, Angel…”

“Morning, babe…” The pet name slipped your lips, but you couldn’t bring yourself to care. He had called you worse last night.

He rolled onto his back, and you lazily straddled his hips, leaning over him to press kisses and lick at his neck.

He chuckled and his hand found your thighs, squeezing the plush skin as he felt your tongue lick through his sideburn. “Wow, sweetheart… what’s gotten into you?”

You shrugged and kept peppering kisses down his torso, which arched beautifully once you reached his nipple and gave it a slight nip. “You just looked so handsome.” You trailed lower, stopping at his happy trail to nuzzle into it. You looked up at him through your lashes, before licking a wet stripe through it, humming as you went along.

His stomach muscles tensed as he looked at you – worshipping him like he was something worthy of it – and all the feelings he had desperately been trying to keep bottled up spread through his ribcage and made it hard for him to breathe.

His hand cupped your cheek as you looked up at him – fully ready to take his hard cock into your mouth – but he stopped your movements.

“Wait, Angel…”

You blinked rapidly, worry mixing in your gut again. You leaned forward a little, just so his groin wasn’t level with your face. “Yeah?”

He swallowed thickly, feeling like his heart was about to burst out of his chest. “Before we keep goin’, I feel like I have to say this.”

The possibilities rushed inside your mind – ‘you can’t catch feelings’, ‘this is still casual’, ‘I don’t see you like that’ – but you were focused on him.

He gave you a lopsided smile, almost apologetic of the words about to come out of his mouth.

“I think m’falling for you.”

****

A/N : Please comment or reblog if you enjoyed this ride, it always makes me feel so warm inside and I'm so grateful for everyone that take the time to read my fics. I love you all!

Taglist (comment if you want to be added, it is a general one for all of my works!) :

In truth, Steve was just hoping to get lucky that night (which for King Steve was nothing new) and you were gorgeous so, of course he had tried his luck. But you hadn’t seem to pick up on his flirting and usually, that was enough to make him walk the other way, find another girl who could keep his bed warm. He had been about to walk away but then you had smiled at him and asked what he wanted to do after college.

Huh. That was new.

A girl asking him a question that wasn’t ’are you clean?’ or ‘why didn’t you call me back?’. A question about him, not surface level too, but one about his future, about what he wanted. Steve had been honest with you—he told you that he didn’t know but that he would probably end up working for his dad. You had titled your head, considering his response before you then asked, “but what do you want, Steve?”.

And fuck, that simple question had derailed his entire evening.

It was the first party in a long time that Steve Harrington hadn’t gotten laid. But that didn’t mean he didn’t get lucky—not when he had spent the whole night talking to you.

He hadn’t seen you since the night of the party since you ran in different circles and lived on other side of campus to the frat house. But Steve had remembered from your conversation (because yes, he had been hanging off every single word you had said) that you went to the library every Wednesday night to study.

And so, that was how he found himself in the library. Because he wanted to see you.

He had been in the library for almost half an hour at this point. His eyes constantly flickering between the book he had been pretending to read and the library doors, hoping that you would soon walk through.

It was just as Steve was beginning to wonder whether he had misheard you that night or if you simply had plans that he finally sees you pushing open the double doors.

Steve feels his chest tighten at the sight of you.

Shit. You looked beautiful and beautiful wasn’t a word Steve Harrington typically used to describe women. But you were.

You were wearing some knitted cardigan and the same smile he remembers from the night of the party. The smile that he hadn’t been able to stop thinking about for the past two weeks, the smile he had been desperate to see again.

Steve feels himself straightening up in his chair, one of his hands reaching up to ruffle his hair as though trying to make it look just a little unkempt. He feels his other hand raise up to catch your attention and he feels like a fucking idiot for doing so but before he could let his arm fall back down to his side, your eyes flicker towards his table.

And the soft smile you give him before making your way over? Well, he felt his evening getting derailed all over again.

His heart thunders in his chest as you walk towards him. Fuck—he had spent so long wondering where you were that he hadn’t even thought about what to actually say to you. He should probably say something smart or funny or—

“Good book?” was the first thing that you ask him when you finally reach his table.

Steve smiles at you, a lopsided and slightly goofy smile that was rarely seen on campus.

“Yeah,” he says, tapping the pages as he grins up at you. “It’s really—”

“Steve?”

“Yeah?”

“You know it’s upside down, right?”

For the first time—in a very, very long time—Steve Harrington blushes. He feels the heat behind his cheeks, a dusting of pink that he prays you don’t see.

“Yeah,” he replies, hoping to salvage the situation so his face doesn’t burn an even darker shade of pink. “I actually, um—I’ve already read it before. Several times and wanted to challenge myself to read it but…upside down.”

It was a terrible excuse and the both of you knew that. But still, you smile at him like you found him endearing. Not King Steve, not the guy who spent his weekends too drunk to remember what happened but him—Steve Harrington—the guy who had spent the past half an hour with a book upside down because he had been too busy looking for you.

“And how exactly is that going for you?” You ask him and Steve feels something swoop low in his gut as he realises you were subtly teasing him.

“Great,” he manages, trying to control the smile on his face. “I love a challenge.”

He sees it—he sees the way you have to fight back a smile at his words. He sees how you very nearly laugh. And fuck, if it doesn’t make him feel more alive than any party ever had.

“Do you maybe want to—”

“—Stevie!”

Oh shit. No, no, no. Absolutely not. Anyone but—

“Hi Sophie,” Steve greets the girl who had just approached his table with a slightly pained smile. He recognised her right away, since Sophie had been the very last girl he had hooked up with before the party where he had met you. The one had hadn’t called back because he had been too busy thinking about you.

Steve watches as Sophie’s face falls slightly.

“It’s Sophia.”

Great. Now he looked like an asshole in front of you.

“Oh,” Steve says, forcing himself not to look at you so he didn’t have to see the disappointment in your eyes. “I knew that.”

Sophie—or Sophia rather—recovers quickly, or at least pretends not to care about the fact that Steve had evidently forgotten her name.

“Did you um, did you lose my number or something?”

“What?” Steve asks her, his eyes finally flickering over to you to try to read your expression. But he can’t. He doesn’t know whether or not that was a good thing.

“My number,” Sophia repeats. “I thought—after we, you know, that you’d call me.”

Kill me now, Steve thought to himself. Just kill me. Make it quick and painless and—

“I’m gonna…go and study now,” you say suddenly before Steve could even think of a reply to Sophia.

Steve’s shoulders slump, part in disappointment and part in shame. Because he didn’t want you to leave and more than that, he didn’t want you to leave thinking he was a selfish asshole who didn’t remember the names of the girls he had slept with.

Steve says your name, half standing up from his chair as he tries to think of an excuse to get you to stay, “wait, I wanted to—”

But you were gone before Steve could finish his sentence.

“Who was she?” Sophia asks, unable to keep the jealousy from her voice.

Steve swallows, watching as you disappear behind a bookshelf as he slumps back into his chair, the book in his hands slipping onto the table.

“Nobody,” Steve mutters, the words feeling like poison on his lips. Because you weren’t a nobody. You were the girl who had managed to turn Steve Harrington’s world on its axis. “She was a nobody.”

Steve bites the inside of his cheek, hating the feeling swirling in his gut as Sophia looks at him as though she didn’t believe a word he said. Steve couldn’t have that, couldn’t have people seeing him disappointed or even mildly upset over a girl—

“Wanna come back to mine, Sophia?”

Steve ignores the way his throat feels tight when she says yes, ignores the voice in his head that told him not as he stands and hooks his arm over her shoulder and he certainly doesn’t run after you like he really wanted to. Because Steve Harrington might feel something for you but King Steve was determined to ignore it.

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