...or at least that's the plan. Then again, I told myself this nearly a month ago after I finishing this book literally titled, āHow To Break Up With Your Phone,āĀ by Catherine Price. I read it in three days (a personal record). All at once, I was intrigued, moved, dumbfounded, shook. And by Chapter 2, completely exposed. Hi. My name is Colleen, and Iām addicted to my phone.
Disclaimer: I did not buy this book (it was passed down to me from a close friend) but I never thought I actually needed it. Phone addiction? Me? Baloney! Of course, I should have known that denial and addiction go hand in hand, but alas, I had to accept that this is just how I am. A phone addict that can't do anything for 5 minutes without simultaneously scrolling through IG or refreshing emails. Except I don't want to be that person, not anymore. We attribute this to being able to "multitask" but the thing is, it isnāt even real. It's physically impossible to devote your entire attention to two things at once. Phones have made concentrating increasingly difficult and convince myself that I have ADD because of it. I want to change and reading this book forced me to want to take action. So now, my next step is to understand how the fuck I got to this point.
Last October, I celebrated my 30th birthday and since then, have been doing an alarmingĀ a healthy amount of soul searching. Months prior, I was experiencing severe anxiety which ultimately led to me quit my job. I noticed a major shift in the way I depended on my phone during this time. The 2016 version of me checked Instagram maybe twice a day, responded to 99% of emails only via laptop, and didnāt text during Netflix binges. The me of today does quite the opposite. Iāve become so obsessed with my phone to the point where itās become a natural reflex to check it every 5 minuets, even if that means feeling the slightest pang of anxiety upon finding out I have zero new notifications. āWe become convinced that the only way to protect ourselves is to constantly check our phones to make sure that weāre not missing something,ā notes Price (p. 32). If youāre like me and already suffer from FOMO, šthis šdoes šnot šhelp!!!
Aside from risking your mental health, our phones are also contributing to this super cute new syndrome calledĀ ātext neckā that Iām sure 1 in every 5 people must have. Have you ever seen memes reminding you to simply look up? Thatās just.......sad. Our relationship with our smart phones is so damning where we donāt know how to function without one anymore. For me,Ā I started realizing the downward spiral shortly after I took a job as a social media manager, where I was constantly refreshing, liking, commenting, searching for the next mannequin challenge, scrolling, scrolling, scrolling, and even more scrolling until my thumbs fell off. Social media quickly becomes your life and before you know it, you are completely consumed with internet culture in every move you make, every step you take...even to the fucking toilet.
There are endless studies on the effects social media has on your mental health, which really shouldnāt surprise anyone. Weāve become so addicted to doing it for the gram that the concept of doing any activity without also posting it to socials is...not normal. Personally, Iāve had it. Officially. So I set a goal for myself in 2019: to regain control of my life. Yeah, I know what youāre thinking and am well aware this could easily just sound like a repeat of my quarter life crisis. But think about it, how many times have you told yourself, "I need to get my life together," throughout your 20s? I, for one, muttered it approximately 728 times since last summer. It seemed serendipitous that within the first week of January, the book just so happened to fall onto my lap. Sort of like a sign from the universe. Accepting Priceās 30 day challenge seemed like the perfect, most tangible starting point.
Breaking up with your phone, including social media, is not going to be an easy feat. I anticipate a lot of slip ups, a lot of excuses, a lot of āit doesnāt countā moments because itās Andy Cohenās baby shower and you can only watch the live feed within 24 hours! It's an addiction, after all, but Iām here writing with the purpose of taking full accountability. In the course of a month, I hope to have a better relationship with my phone, and hey, maybe even a better understanding of where the fuck my life is going.
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