sucks to be u

ikea is honestly so sick and twisted for making those tiny fake apartments. like. ok. maybe I will walk around and daydream. fuck u.

Bro unblock me i am vaccinated

can i sell my feelings on ebay i don’t want them anymore

please don't hand me the aux unless you want everyone in this car to know there's something wrong with me

*looks at you like you are a jar of honey in the sun*

talking to my infant son like im a youtuber

Whats up baby. Father here bringing you another spoonful of Gerber ham and gravy baby food

havin peoples home addresses is surreal bc i could like randomly send them a photo of a clam?? that’s something i could do? i literally have the means to send them a physical image of a bivalve mollusk but i never ddo

Never apologize for your giant dogs getting overexcited, if I get taken down by a 100 pound mass of fluff then that’s how I go.