re:

CROSSMAN, R. H. S., Plato To-day, 1937. (via ctapajoz)

Gabito Nunes.  (via tritongos)

Me myself and i.

I don’t have a clever saying or idea for you to focus on this week. The truth of it is that I’ve been struggling with a lot of internal issues myself as of late. I can’t exactly be strong for others while I find myself unable to be strong in my daily life. I started posting Motivational Monday’s because it was not only a way to bring positivity to others but an outlet for me to work on things that were presenting themselves in my world. I tend to get a lot of shit for putting out such personal information but the thing is that I got tired of being quiet about it. I spent 20 some years dealing with things that I didn’t understand. When I was younger no one talked about mental illness. Eating disorders were looked at as something that only plagued rich white girls trying to be super models and if you didn’t have a mainstream, well known about, easily labeled eating disorder well then you didn’t have shit. You just had no self control and/or were fat. Binge eating to deal with emotional issues like depression and anxiety weren’t talked about. Depression only counted if you were cutting yourself. If you had to force a smile when all you’d rather do is lay in your bed for hours, well then you were lazy. How can you just not find a way to be happy? You’re so incredibly blessed with all these things. Just be happy. Anxiety wasn’t really a thing either. You were just awkward. And what if you were popular? It was impossible for you to be depressed or anxious if you were popular…right? Of course not, that’s not a thing. So yeah, I’m talking about it. I get it. I’m just a model/naked internet girl/performer/whatever you want to call me. I should just show the world how successful and happy I am. How I party it up and blah blah blah. I’m not going to do that. Yes, I have some amazing moments in my life. I won’t belittle those, but that doesn’t mean I don’t struggle with these things all the time and maybe if others had talked about these issues when I was younger it wouldn’t have taken me to until my late 20’s to figure out that I even had these issues. Maybe instead of drinking, or heading out for a smoke, or even hiding behind the easy out of “I’m performing so I have to say hi to everyone and can’t stay for a real conversation” I would have been able to recognize that I had used all these things to lessen a deeper problem. Maybe instead of consistently fighting what seems like an uphill battle I’d be better by now. Maybe not better but maybe ok. I’m working on it. I do whole heartedly believe it does get better, but since I can’t offer you anything I’m taking (at least) this week to unplug and focus on me. You do you and I’ll do me and after a week of radio science let’s get back together and see how we are.

Continuar lendo

Quando dei por mim já  tinha me tornado uma pessoa fria e sem sentimento algum. Por mais que tudo em minha volta se mostrasse feliz, meu rancor era maior que qualquer coisa. Fiquei implicante, chato e mal-humorado. Sem entender esses risos descontrolados, e inúteis. Essas frases de impacto que nunca salvarão o mundo, essas pessoas que falam de amor como se fosse algo fácil e simples, pessoas que amam pessoas sem nunca terem se visto pessoalmente; amizades falsas e simplesmente por interesse. Enfim, quando dei por mim, fiquei mais critico e seletivo. Agora só desejo que o mundo me entenda; eu não escolhi ser assim, o mundo me tornou assim. Um dia quem sabe meu senso de ridículo vá embora, e eu volte a gostar do mundo como ele é. Wf

(The World Of A Girl Any)

Comer, Rezar, Amar (via v--a--m--p--i--r--e)