queer as in weird

reverse ‘i knew about it before it was cool’. i refuse to consume it until it is borderline irrelevant.

when i was in middle school nickelodeon on directv broke and it froze on the same frame for five hours. which would not have been so bad, except it was during the episode of spongebob where he goes to live with the jellyfish. specifically the scene where he’s naked and covered in sea urchins and flopping all over the place trying to get them off. and it froze on the frame where spongebob was facedown on the ground, naked. so he was laying there like that in complete silence for five hours. we would change the channel back every so often to see if he’d gotten up, but he was still like that when we went to bed. none of my friends had directv so when i asked them the next day they hadn’t seen it, but my brother and i were pretty convinced that spongebob was dead.

*face flat on a table* is it november already?? how?? the year started like. 2 months ago. I distinctly remember it not being anytime close to november just a bit ago. how is it november???

when two trans people have sex god becomes jealous because that is one thing she did not think to create, but allowed us to invent on our own & she wishes she could take credit for such miracle

what if you were playing basketball and you went to dribble the ball but it was ceramic and shattered everywhere and everyone got mad at you about it