ColibriVerde

I’m getting so tired of not being considered. Tired of getting everyone’s shit dumped on me but when I try to get some insight or advice, I get a fleeting comment. I’ve been really struggling lately because I keep getting told I shouldn’t rely on others to be there for me. So I’ve been focusing on myself but dude, I am only human. I’m not a robot who can go without human interaction, friendly support and consideration from my “friends”. Everyone else seems to get it. I’m so sick of transactional friendships. That’s not what I need or want. I want someone to truly care enough to want to be there for me the way I’m there for them, time and time again. Sadly i’ve pretty much given up. People are just a disappointment.

I actually got off my ass and came on a beach walk, purposely exercising! And wow it feels good!! I’m wearing my highlighter sweater so everyone is staring but whatever. Going to visit my friend at the juice bar.

I’m not usually one to cancel, but I want to cancel on this guy so bad. I’m taking an hour long metro ride to see a soccer game with him, and I’m not even excited about it. I was on the verge of cancelling but didn’t. Using the ride as a time to read and chill out. Definitely not doing this again. It’s because I had to set an alarm and wake up early for this. No man deserves that. I’d rather be back in bed. I don’t care enough about major league sports for this. I’m not even getting laid! This is the opposite of getting flewed out..