Ro🌑

!!Yellowjackets s3 spoilers!!

*cracks knuckles*

So, I was rewatching Yellowjackets instead of paying attention to homework again and got to that lovely scene where Tai approaches Van and goes "Hey if we go back we can't be together anymore can we?" and I was thinking about it in the context of what Liv said about Van making up stories to get herself through things- and while yes, this episode is Van's turning point to realising her little stories could be entirely wrong, she's not quiittteee at that point yet. Before Kodi dies, she's still fine with her self-gaslighting. So, looking at this scene with that lense.....it breaks me, a little bit.

First off:

Look me in the eyes and tell me this ain't other Tai. I'm like 99% certain this conversation is Other Tai which almost makes it more interesting- (bro wrote this before i finished rewatching the scene it was explicitly other tai because the eyeless man is there i forgor) Anyways, Tai and Van are talking:

"Do you really think the world has changed that much?"

"I'm optimistic."

"Why?"

"Because.........me."

When Van says the initial "I'm optimistic" her voice is low, she's sounds a little annoyed, its more of a demand than it is an answer. "this is okay, it has to be okay, we're okay" If she can convince Tai, she's done her job, she's kept everyone happy and positive and safe, and she can believe it too. But when it comes to the "Because......Me" there is a noticeable shift from this stern, demanding tone into something a little softer. You can see her search for a moment, trying to find a reason she can latch onto- but she can't find one, she can't find any reason to think the world is suddenly all good with people like herself and Tai, so she pretty much blatantly says the only reason she has going for her: "Me." because that's what she does. She picks whatever "truths" keep her and everyone else going and doesn't even consider an alternative. The "Me" statement is both a moment of introspect almost, and a callout for the audience to her habits. She's picked her story, that they can go back, and everyone will be fine with them being together, or they can just hide like they did before, and it'll be all good.

And then there's Tai. Standing there, telling her all the reasons, that this inaccurate! She's breaking the illusion! Back off, other Tai! We like denial in this household!! But here's Tai telling her why her stories are wrong and I find Van's reactions incredibly interesting (especially in contrast with their card scene in episode 10)

She's sitting there looking at the invisible camera in the office like "guys are you seeing this-" and at one point, even looks slightly amused. Given what we already know about Van, and how she uses humour as a coping mechanism, I would not put it past her to be a nervous laugher (speaking from personal experience). Van's reaction is akin to if Tai had just said something like "oh btw misty just turned into a squirrel"- she's in disbelief, finds it a little amusing, and slightly stupid. Because to her, the answer is obvious- It's not a problem, its never going to be a problem, we're going home and its all fine.

"Why is nobody thinking about this?"

"Because getting rescued. And going home. Outweighs- all of that."

"So just...go get a bag, and lets put some shit in it!"

Van's line here is pretty reminiscent of how she talks to Travis about eating Javi. It's authoritative, almost rehearsed, like she's said it to herself a million times. "We're getting rescued. We're going home. And don't worry about anything else because this is the only important thing." It's a statement that she could easily tell herself and likely has been telling herself to keep her going. And it's the same thing she'll tell Tai because she's the storyteller, she is the one who keeps them all calm, and that's her job. Just wanted to point out how this plays into my previous Vanalysis about her gaslighting herself with narratives of how everything is justified and will play out fine. Van then directly contrasts this rehearsed, demanding tone with a more lighthearted "go get a bag, lets pack". She's trying to shift the conversation back to "yayyy rescue!!!" because that is the narrative she's decided on and that is the narrative everyone else is gonna hear from her.

And yet, when Tai "walks away" and Van thinks she's alone?

People love to say Shauna was cruel to suggest Nat, but... is she wrong to suggest that the hunter should be the one to shoot Ben? Sure, shooting a human is different from shooting animals, but also... so does butchering animals compared to humans, and yet Shauna was expected to butcher Javi's corpse because she was the butcher. Sure, she chose that role, but under the assumption she'd only butcher animal corpses, not humans. So it is fair for her to expect that Nat, who chose to shoot animals, should be required to shoot a human if needed.

And yet Nat decides that it should be a draw, and she added "just like with everything else". This must have stung for Shauna, because she knows it's not true. There was no draw for who had to kill Nat after she drew the queen, or to butcher Javi. Shauna was instantly expected to do it because she was the butcher, but the same expectation was never extended to Nat being the hunter.

That's why Shauna looks so happy when she didn't draw the king, because she knew that for once, it wouldn't be her who would do the dirty work. Someone else will know how she felt.

That explains a lot of Shauna's growing resentment towards Nat, because even if Nat doesn't realize it, it was hypocritical to request a draw and claim this is what they always do. And Shauna is aware of that. Of course, it would have been traumatizing to make Nat do it, given what happened with Nat's father. But that was also traumatizing for Shauna to have to butcher Javi, a child, right after she lost her baby. So I think Shauna wanted Nat to understand what she had to go through, and making her butcher Ben in a later episode was essentially that.

"quick levi snap the pic!" - Hange probably, she would love flying titan

‘Eyes’ are one of the more common magic eating species found throughout the Spiral. Though mostly solitary, large flocks do congregate around areas of heavily concentrated magic, a property that has aided in the mapping of Leylines.

Different species of Eye feed on different forms of magic, each shaped by the type they consume. Most wizards have experienced one following them around at one point or another; they’re loyal pets to some and nuisances to others.

Dragonspyre: Malestaire died, you couldn’t do anything but kill him, the wiz and Cyrus are probably feeling so much guilt and pain right now. You did your best and u saved the spiral but at a cost, and you could have prevented it. He still wasn’t a good person, just sad and lonely, willing to do anything to get his old life back. 

domestic life with van palmer ! van palmer x reader

brrrr my head is so fuzzy and I'm so warm just thinking about spending your days with Van- your partner, in your apartment with your orange kitty!!

Your apartment is mostly decorated with things you both like, her vhs and movie posters, and the things you love all over the house. having matching mugs, keychains, silverware, pajamas, robes - literally everything.

I don't think Van is a morning person- she prefers staying in bed with you in the morning watching the sun hit your face and shine the whole room- just enjoying these small moments.

Fridays are for takeout and movie nights. When it's her night, they want to show you movies that you haven't watched that she loves and only she knows about.

Cuddling together on the couch with your cat in the middle of you sleeping peacefully. She definitely was hesitant about getting a cat- but then all she thought about was taking care of him with you- and he's like your son, she loves it.

Dancing around the kitchen late at night after having some drinks - her holding your waist and twirling you around just so that she could kiss you right after.

She loves the small moments- they are very important to her - she loves when you're cooking together, washing the dishes, cleaning the house, decorating.

Van coming home with a snack from a coffee shop and magazines about movies and about your favorite interest because if there's one thing van does is listen to her girl.

Listens to you talk about everything that you like and she always know - knows your favorite food, your favorite bands/singers, and even your most niche interest you thought she didn't know about.

You reading that said magazine while she takes a shower and dresses more comfortable clothes, only to meet you in the couch and be attacked with kisses.

She opens every door for you, wants to pay for everything and will pay even if you grab her arm and tell her no. Brushes your hair and even learns how to do your favorite hairstyle, walks by the side of the road so you won't, grabs your bags while shopping, drives the car...

If she gets home late, and she sees you sleeping in the couch with the TV on she'll get ready real fast and then turns off the TV and picks you up- bridal style, puts you in bed and kisses your forehead. She hates to see you uncomfortable and you waiting for her even tho you're clearly tired.

" honey I've told you to go to bed when I'm late- you always complain about your back in the morning " she says while you got more comfortable in bed, but you just cuddle into her and put your face on her chest. " I wann' wait for you " you mumble and she sighs kissing your head. " I know... I know you do pretty "

If you want to decorate the house or buy some more furniture- she guarantees she can build it or restore it but she gets frustrated after an hour and gives up, only to try it again the next day.

When she does it shes all cocky. " See, i told you i could do it- im handy " you chuckle and shake your head. " Sure honey"

(she/they pronouns for van)

thinking of movie nerd van and her theatre nerd gf