Cloud Seventy-One

Finished "Norwegian Wood" this afternoon. It kept my interest although it did feel like the focus was just on the sex rather than the relationships at times (though maybe he did it that way on purpose?). I enjoyed the development of Naoko the most out of all the characters as she was the one I could relate to the most (sad, right?). Anyway, I would probably pick it up to read again.

I find myself wondering, on nights like this where I can't fall asleep because I'm stuck in the cloud of self-depricating thoughts which makes me anxious, if anything has gotten better since I got help. Most of the time I think that it's worse now because I'm in a sort of self-fulfilling prophecy where I wasn't that bad off before and was just being an attention - seeking melodramatic idiot. I really hope that isn't the case.

I don't think the medication is helping. Nothing I've tried so far feels like it has worked. I feel discouraged that I'm not feeling the "warm cocoon" that people described to me when I started the medication. Why can't there just be a magic pill that solves it all?