Cl0setmonsterXX

No, I'm not a human (main)

☆ Lurking for love

Outlast Trials

Dispatch

Overwatch

Date everything

Gorillaz

Stardew Valley

Dead by Daylight (Strictly for The Unknown)

MHA

Outlast Trials

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☆☆☆☆☆

Scenario 1. (smiling at him while he eats)

you both just recently got home, you were both unwinding after what you recently watched. It was a late screening, so Jacob was making dinner. You were thinking whilst he cooked... He did remind you a bit of Nikki. He was stalkery, he was a bit obsessed, and he seemed to rely on you to keep himself from lashing out or something. But you knew all of that already. But you decided you'd try and turn the tables a bit, you were gonna act like Nikki did, to freak him out, for however long you wanted. Just to make him see how you feel when you wake up in the middle of the night and he's staring at you or when he stands outside the door almost every time you go to the bathroom.

Once he finished making dinner and had dished it up, you hopped up from the couch and sauntered over to the table as he put the dishes down, smiling over at you. You smiled back and sat down, the sight of the almost perfectly cooked salmon was incredible, since you might as well be starving. A comfortable silence fell over both of you as you both ate, and after a minute, you merely fidgeted with the fork, staring at him whilst he ate, neglecting your half eaten salmon. You were simply acting, you knew that, but you were admiring him at the same time. This gave you an excuse to stare at him, especially his eyes, god you adored his eyes.

He finally took notice of you staring, looking up to meet your eyes, the permanent soft smile on your face was a little freaky. But the sight of you adoring him made his face flush, though he soon figured out what you were doing. He chuckled as he took another bite of his food, seeing you hold back a giggle pretty well. He swallowed and spoke up, "What're you doin'?" He asked, only receiving that same unmoving stare as a response, making him chuckle. "I can do that too, y'know." He responded, his tone warm as he stared back at you, his eyes soft but carrying that same obsession in yours. It was a little hard to tell if you were joking, but it was clear his obsession was genuine. He tilted his head and hummed as he admired you, smirking softly when he saw you break and giggle whilst covering your mouth. "You're no fair" "and you're cute" he retorted, chuckling at your reaction.

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Scenario 2. (Standing at the bathroom door when he's in there)

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He left you to go to the bathroom, you did plan on just staying in bed, but how boring would that be? Instead, you decided to show him how "you couldn't stand being far away from him".

You tried your best to be silent, shoving the bed covers off of you and tip-toeing down the hall, pajamas messy and hair disheveled as you arrived at the occupied bathroom. You knew you were acting, but this was a bit relieving, oddly enough. Being in his shoes for once, getting to see what he does when he does these things. You tried your best to stand quietly as you stared at the door, putting on a pathetic look, like you got upset being away from him.

You heard the toilet flush, then the tap turn on, ect... And finally, he opened the door. He paused at the sight of you, seeming slightly startled by you but it was gone fast. His eyes slightly widened as he registered that you were actually there, and how pathetic you looked, that pretty pout on your lips was priceless... Without even speaking, his eyebrows creased lovingly as he leaned forward and moved the hair from your face, kissing your forehead and chuckling through his nose. "Now, what're you doin' here? I figured you'd be in bed." He asked, looking at the way your pouted stayed, but lessened. "I got lonely... You were taking too long." You responded, sounding pathetic. He was only in there for maybe 5 minutes, but that made your acting even more effective, in your eyes. "Darlin', I was in there for a few minutes?" "I know..." He tilted his head and smirked softly, adoring this acting you were showcasing to him. "C'mon, lets get back to bed." He said, his hand moving to the small of your back, hearing you giggle as he guided you back to the messy bed you shared.

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Scenario 3. (desperately refusing he go to work) imma love this one... like the date scene fyi

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You both got up not long ago, but you had no intention of stopping your little show. You were both sat comfortably in the kitchen, sipping coffee in more comfortable silence. You knew this time, your acting was gonna be a bit much, but it might work. He had his work uniform on, and he put his now empty mug down, moving his hands up to tie his hair up. You had to start soon, huffing through your nose to gather your confidence as he started making sure he had everything for work.

"what're you doing?" your soft tone made him turn his head to look at you, him tilting his head like a dog at your question. He thought it was obvious. "I'm gettin' ready for work, baby?" He responded, registering the frown forming on your face. God, you looked like you were being abandoned. "I thought we were gonna have a nice day together?" You responded sadly, tone almost turning desperate. Why'd you have to do this to him? you know how hard it was for him to leave in the morning in the first place. "Darlin', you know I gotta go.." It sounded like he was actually in pain due to denying you, but he didn't want his boss getting mad at him. "but- I don't want you to." You pouted, eyebrows creasing as you put down your mug, eyes never leaving him. "Um, alright.. how 'bout this, I'll call you every hour, yeah? I really should to come to work today. You know I don't wanna leave ya..."

It was making you feel bad, but you wanted this to work, and you know he'll crack, he loved you too much. You watched him pick up his bag and sling it over his shoulder, moves hesitant as he walked to the front door. Without even answering his suggestion, you got up, but didn't walk to him. You stayed right there, but you did pout and cause your lip to tremble. "nooo, noo, no, no, no, no. I thought we were having a day at home? Don't leave me!" You said a bit louder, hands trembling a little. Did you feel bad? no. Jacob not only had the payment for the bills already put aside, but his boss couldn't care that much, he's there every other day. You almost didn't register how fast he put his bag down, but you didn't fail to properly register how fast he came to you, like you were gravity itself. He hugged you, his head landing in the crook of your neck. He didn't care if you were joking, he wasn't leaving. The sight of you so desperate to keep him was mesmerizing, he would've responded in a similar way if the roles were reversed. He knew you were simply copying the movie from last night, but he let himself imagine you were being genuine.

"Oh, Darlin'... Y'know I love you too much to do that to ya.. I'm not leavin'... I swear. I'm all yours. I love y'so much..." was murmured into your hair, he sounded desperate to prove it, even as you hugged him back, his emotions were intense. You didn't dare say you were acting, you weren't even sure if you were honestly. That worried you.

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Scenario 4. (kneeling next to him when he's sitting down to get a kiss)

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You were in your office, conveniently next to Jacob's office. He was busy helping some random woman over facebook. That's what he told you when he came in to give you a drink, he always let you know how his work was going, but you decided to act like you were jealous. You knew your Jacob would rather be brutally murdered than upset you, but you wouldn't make a big scene of it. Besides, isn't that something Nikki would've done? This was honestly similar to that scene when she moves that other girl to be next to Bear to get a kiss... Well, now you know what you're doing.

You put your drink on the desk in front of you, stretching and getting up, making sure you didn't look a mess in the mirror nearby. You huffed through your nose and walked out, leaving the door open behind you as you marched to his office. You turned the doorknob slowly and peeked through the crack of the door, only hearing the clacking of his keyboard. You opened the door properly, watching him turn and look at you, his bored expression immediately shifting to happy at the sight of you, making you want to smile but you kept your tiny pout. "Darlin', I missed you." You were just in the other room, but that was sweet. "Somethin' the matter?" He asked after spotting the pout on your lips, hearing a ping from his computer, signaling the woman he was trying to help had responded to a question, but he didn't even react to it.

He watched as you walked over, eyebrows rising as he watched you kneel next to him, cheeks heating up at the sight of your maintained eye contact. You pursed your lips, hands moving to rest on his lap. He recognized what you were doing and chuckled, leaning down and planting a chaste kiss on your lips. You hummed and smiled, deciding to get comfortable, resting your head in your arms on his lap. "What're you doing?" You asked softly, looking up at him affectionately. "I'm helping that same woman from before, she's a very slow typer." He said humorously, earning a giggle from you. "What're you doing?" He repeated your question back to you. "I was jealous. You're giving her all your attention.." you huffed, not expecting his reaction. His hand came down to pat your hair gently, cooing down at you "Oh, Darlin'... Why don't you come up? Y'know I'd never do that to you, I adore you." He said lovingly as you did stand up, climbing into his lap and getting comfortable, making him smile as he held onto you, kissing your cheek. He didn't even try to look over your shoulder to get back to the stranger, just looking at you. "Kiss me properly.." You muttered with a pout, so he did. He moved a hand to your cheek and leaned in, kissing you like you wanted. You giggled into the kiss and kissed him back.

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preparation was like any other movie night. He was in the kitchen, preparing popcorn and getting drinks, whilst you picked a movie. Sometimes he picked, but it was usually you. And tonight, you both settled with watching Youtube short horror films instead of a few actual movies. You thought you'd have to ask more than once, but he seemed to agree the moment you'd suggested it. You knew he'd never really seen any before, so you told him they were actually scary, unlike his less than scary favourite horror films, but he said he'd be fine. So, being a bit of an asshole, you selected the scariest ones you could find or think of, some of them being ones even you haven't seen yet. You've seen some of the ones you chose, but you mostly watched horror movies or scary compilations on youtube, so you were spoiler free.

Once he came back from the kitchen, he witnessed you grinning like a Cheshire cat with the remote in your hands. You looked evil. Some playlist of films was on the screen, with titles like 'METHOD', 'IGNORE IT', and such going down the long list on his tv. He was still relatively confident he wouldn't get too scared, he's seen plenty of horror. He chuckled at your grin and walked to the coffee table, putting the bowl of popcorn down and then sitting down. "Well don't you look excited." He said almost adoringly, he didn't seem scared at all. Mostly since you haven't hit play yet, instead saying "I am, trust me, this is gonna be great." as you put the playlist on shuffle to avoid knowing which one was next and then plopped down next to him.

You reached for the throw blanket and put it over the two of you, Jacob's arm going around your shoulders instinctively as the first short started playing. You were doing okay, this was one was quite short, one you'd seen before. Man On a Train was a good one to start off with, in your opinion. At the beginning, Jacob commented on the conversation heard from two girls in the background "the hell are they talking about?", and that earnt a laugh from you. Two minutes in, you look up at him again, and his expression is uncomfortable, his eyebrows were furrowed and he was frowning a bit. That was expected though, this one was tense. You shimmied closer to him and laid your head on his shoulder in a subtle attempt at grounding him, and it seemed to work relatively well. But then the man on the screen kept getting closer, and a frown developed on his face. You tensed a bit too instinctively, but he seemed to be dreading the next moment more than he should be. As you remembered it, the man appeared next to the protagonist, and your Jacob gasped, sounding like he almost choked.

You wanted to laugh, but didn't wanna sound condescending, so you chuckled, and he followed suit, obviously out of nerves. Luckily for him, that's when that film cut off. He looked down at you and smiling a little, chuckling. "Y'didn't tell me these were gonna be like this." he said as he chuckled, "well, what were you expecting? I told you these were gonna be scary." was all he got in reply from you, you sounded more sweet than mocking though. He didn't answer with a comment, since the next one had started playing. Instead, he hummed and kissed the crown of your head, his eyes drifting back to the TV.

The next one to play was one of the more well known ones, Portrait of God. He had a keen eye, despite his need for glasses, so you were sure he'd notice everything. As he watched, his hand moved down to lace his fingers with yours, making you smile. His grip tightened a little as he gasped, quick to notice two eyes behind the protagonist. "y'see that?" He whispered. "mhm" you hummed, smiling a little. He watched with his full attention as he looked at the same thing the protagonist was, eyebrows creasing and then frowning a little as he saw the form slowly taking shape. It sounded like he whined when he saw the form stay after it should've disappeared. He leaned forward as the film progressed, a deeper frown forming as he watched. It wasn't scream worthy at all, but regardless, it was intense for him.

When the film stopped, he side eyed you with what was clearly saying 'what the fuck was that'. It made you laugh as you rubbed your thumb across the back of his hand, easing him a little. Before you could add on, the next one started, this one you hadn't seen, called 'They Hear It". It was likely sound based, so as he kept his eyes on the screen, you reached for the remote and turned the volume up, making Jacob huff in fake upset when he saw the volume rise.

You instinctively curled up on the couch as you watched, "if that dog dies I swear to god" leaving your lips quietly, making him chuckle out his nose. He relaxed his grip on your hand, but shortly after, your own grip intensified as you saw the dog run off and then heard it die shortly after, making you both whine. You wrapped the blanket around you more at the noises coming from the TV. You held back a whimper at the pattering of feet from outside the protagonists room. Jacob did whimper when the protagonist was stupid enough to call out, insinuating what came next was clear. yet, the pair of you still gasped when the pattering quickly came to the door and bashed against it.

Jacob, after gasping, whimpered and gripped the blanket with almost shaky hands, moving under it more. as the film went on, Jacob and you grew more tense, with Jacob shimmying more under the blanket, gripping it tight. You flinched when a branch snapped, the forest around the protagonist too dark for your liking. When the Alien did show up and attack the girl, it made you make a weird noise as you gasped. Meanwhile Jacob yelped loudly, his sweaty hands moved from the blanket to your hand, his grip like a vice. That seemed to do little else but scare you, as you flinched again at the sudden move.

"Shit- sorry-" He blurted out, looking pretty frazzled for someone who said he'd be fine. You sighed through your nose and nodded, smiling a little. "it's fine." You said with a chuckle, obviously fine already. The next video began, and it started with a loud noise, making your Jacob jump, yelp, and almost duck under the blanket. You flinched too, but it resulted in a laugh from you at the sight of such a beefy guy being so scared. He groaned and let his head fall against you, whining pathetically so you paused the next film before it had a chance to open to the next scene, looking down at your man.

"Sorry, hon.. Just, that was... a lot." He said, embarrassed but secretly adoring being able to have this moment with you. "it's okay, lemme know when you wanna start up again." You chuckled, you were scared yourself, and wanted to watch the next one, but decided to wait. And he appreciated that more than he let on, since he just learnt your sweeter than he ever thought.

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He hasn’t looked away from his computer yet, he’s been watching you for at least 2 hours now. To him, it’s like watching a private livestream, a grainy quality livestream, just for him. He really had to get better cameras, he’d already ordered them really, but he didn’t get same day delivery and they’re taking too long. But regardless, he could see the effort you put into your makeup. Despite how you’ve restarted out of pure anger, you clearly cared about it. He watched you slowly draw outlines of a design you had in mind, his head tilting in curiosity as it took shape. He wondered how hard it could really be, it couldn’t be that hard. Then again, he wasn’t a great artist, but maybe that didn’t matter.

3 hrs later…

He tore his eyes from him monitor once you’d finally finished, the pair of you admiring your work for a while. Now, he was in his own bathroom, his less than ideal “makeup station” intimidating him, sprawled out on his bathroom sink. The makeup wasn’t his, it’s literally just old eyeliners, white face paints, a singular thing of black eyeshadow, one liquid eyeliner, and black lipstick (all stolen from your bathroom). He didn’t know what to start with at all, he was only doing this because he was curious, and he wanted to connect with you in some way. He ended up with messy white paint coating his face, eyeshadow just barely put on right, messy eyeliner, and black lipstick in his hand. He wasn’t sure what the black liquid eyeliner was about, so he tried putting it on as nail polish, now it’s smudged. Not to mention he couldn’t really see that well, his glasses were somewhere on the sink edge. He looked a fucking mess, but he saw it as progress to winning your heart, somehow. Maybe you were able to tell he was doing this, or that he was this interested in something he clearly couldn’t pull off just because you liked it. He knew he looked bad, and now it seemed to click that THIS was why it was so infuriating for you.

He reached for the sink and turned the tap on, then leaned down and splashed his face with water to take it off. He thought he’d gotten it off, so he squinted to search for his glasses, grabbed them, and put them on. Adjusting and then blinking a few times, he leaned forward to be closer tot he mirror. He was staring in disbelief, his glasses now covered in water, and his face still covered with poorly applied makeup. He didn’t realise that all the makeup he took over all this time was water proof. He panicked shortly after, and now his search history is full of searches like “get makeup off no remover” and “makeup remover replacement”, along with another trip to amazons website to purchase makeup remover.

He didn’t wanna leave the house to get the main replacements he could use, so now he’s waiting, looking like a poor jester, for his same day delivery makeup remover to arrive.

Drabble two: [seeing out without makeup]

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He’s been on a winning streak lately, you’re not only dating him now, but your beauty was bewildering to him. He knew you were incredible, but he’s more smitten than ever, especially with the scene. He’s sat on the couch looking behind him, he’s staring at you whilst you’re in the doorway from the bathroom, without your makeup on for “the first time” around him. He had his head on his hand, gazing at you with enough love to melt even satans heart. You looked just breathtaking to him, your were prettier than he’s ever seen you, but he thinks that every time he sees you. He hasn’t just seen you without makeup over camera, it isn’t his first time seeing it in person. But it’s so much better than when you’re asleep.

"C'mon! Just an itty-bitty slap? not even- gonna... punch? pinch?? h...heh, that rhymes." He said, somehow distracting himself despite him currently begging on his knees. You'd always known he was down bad for the weird shit, but this was a new low. Begging to be hurt? that was something else. You were set on this, though squirming slightly at his persistent begging. "No! I don't wanna hurt you, stop asking.." was all he was ever given in response from you. Always something along those lines, never agreement.

"puh-lease! pwetty-wetty please? How've I gotta ask??" He whined,looking up at you as he continued "anything! even spit..! doesn't hurt... But still!" he'd added desperately, though still all he got was an answer that spelled out refusal. "N-no! stop begging, you're making this harder." you'd groaned, looking away to make it harder for him to lock eyes, since he was giving you the biggest puppy dog eyes he could muster. You didn't love admitting it, but moments like these make it even clearer that there's something wrong with him. “Now- leave me alone!” You added curtly before he could open his mouth again, turning and walking off despite how your heart tugged to not leave the guy all worked up. He tried to grab your legs in a desperate attempt at keeping you, and when he failed he whimpered, got up, and followed after you. You better lock that bedroom door, because if you don’t he’s climbing into that bed and begging you whilst clinging to you like a stubborn child in a toy aisle.

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Murdoc

he's smooth about it, but also out of no where. kisses you for no reason

he wants kisses from you a lot, and adores when you're first to initiate.

he usually goes about it by moving his hand to your waist, then tugging you to him and smooching you.

sometimes though, when you're both alone, he wraps his arms around your neck to kiss you, a lot softer.

his kisses are either long and passionate, or short and sweet, there's no in between.

kisses the fuck out of your neck when you're in private, you always have hickeys or bite marks on you.

when he's jealous, his kisses get a bit more intentional, a bit more rough too sometimes. Intentionally places his hand on your hip or cheek, y'know.

2D

This man is awkward about it when you first start dating

he isn't sure when he's allowed to kiss you, but even if you express that he can kiss you whenever, he'll get nervous.

later on in your relationship though, he gets more confident.

cheek kisses all the time, same with hand kisses when he's about to go on stage.

When he kisses you, he likes to keep his hand on your cheek. He thinks it's sweet.

gets very flustered if you initiate with your hand on his hip or something, and when you initiate in general he gets giggly.

when you're cuddling, he loves kissing the top of your head.

if he's jealous, and you're early on in the relationship, he doesn't speak up on it, but when you're in private he does.

if you've been dating for a long time and he's jealous, he does speak up. By speaking up, I mean he walks up, kisses you on the cheek, and asks if you're ready to go. Totally ignores the other person

Noodle

this girl is so different about it, you're never sure what type of kiss you'll get.

when you're just hanging out, its either a lil smooch or a sweet kiss on the cheek

other times, it ranges from regular kissing, to kisses on the corner of your lips. seriously.

loves receiving kisses on the tip of her nose, and also when you initiate kisses.

if she's jealous, she's not shy about it 9 times out of 10. Will typically go to you and the other person, tell them you're taken, and storm off with your hand in hers.

Russel

this man knows how to kiss beautifully. he's such a lover I can't even.

he knows the perfect time to kiss you to calm you down, knows where to kiss to make you squeal, everything.

kiss the top of his bald ahh head and he won't know whether to laugh or be complimented. Takes it as a compliment.

kisses you after dates or when he drops you off at you're house. If you live together though, he kisses you anyway when you get home.

the type to ask if you want a kiss and then hand you a Hershey's kiss. But then kisses you as an apology.

if he's jealous, he waist until the other person is gone, and then once he has you alone, he kisses you so passionately you're sure your soul left you.

Del

you phase through him when you try to kiss him.

He tries too, but you phase through him again.

you settled with 'almost kisses', where he either blows you a kiss or acts like he did kiss you.

Ace

we're not gonna act like this man doesn't hold you by your hips and dip you when you kiss.

if not that, he grabs your face with both his hands and smooches you.

adores if you kiss his nose or forehead, giggles like a teenage boy in puppy love.

if he wants you to kiss him, you'll notice since he starts following you like right behind you. If you're sitting he goes behind you and puts his head on your shoulder.

kisses with him are long and sweet, he's so the type to giggle after kissing you.

if you're kissing in bed, like cuddling or something u perv. After he's satisfied with the kisses he's given you he gazes at you and sighs dreamily, then lays his head under your chin and dozes off.

not kissing related but he sleeps on top of you like a clingy cat.

it was 9pm, you and him were up while everyone else slept. 8pm to midnight was the gap where everyone was asleep, including the homeowner. It was your private time, where you can just be a normal couple in privacy without prying eyes. You were both in the closet like usual, that creepy guy had left to spy on the homeowner while he slept, so you two were alone. You thought that guy was a girl for a while honestly, until he opened his mouth.

You brought yourself back to the present, where you and your boyfriend were cuddling in the back of the closet. He was under you, yourself resting in his lap with his head resting on your chest. You'd laid out a spare blanket or two that you found in the room to avoid how uncomfortable laying in the closet was.

He'd nuzzled his head into your chest, drawing a chuckle from you as you shifted to get a bit closer, a bit more comfortable. He didn't budge when you moved, keeping his head in your chest and a tired but firm grip around your waist. Not that you wanted him to move, but it was humorous to see how stubborn he was.

You figured it'd be best to get to sleep before the creepy guy came back. Lord knows he'd see you awake and start talking. So when Wireface had finally succumbed to sleep, you followed suit, your face nuzzling into his neck.

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Don't be confused, the home owner doesn't hate you. He just doesn't like you.

Though, whether you cared or not, nobody could tell. You never really showed much feeling, besides when you laugh to yourself at a memory, or catch yourself smiling at a dog outside, or... something. The others weren't sure what was going through the home owners head when he let you in, you were worse than that guy outside for fucks sake. Always watching, there even when they think you aren't, and just being so fucking unsettling with the shit that came out of your mouth.

You couldn't blame them for hating you, you'd be the same if you weren't you, you knew you were creepy. You'd been kicked out of a few places before, you didn't get let into many to begin with. Only morons let you in, either morons or people who thought they'd be able to kill you once you showed some kind of sign. But you were sign free, lucky you. You were used to people treating you like a sign of bad luck, like some poor black cat who wandered into the wrong village. Except the cat probably had it better.

So you were half surprised to see the tall man at the door of this place, skin baggy and pale as snow, not have a negative reaction at the feeling of your stare from the peep hole. Or really, a reaction at all. Well, he did, once you opened the fucking door. It wasn't truly negative, no repulsion or flinch, but that's expected form someone like him, all he did was tilt his head. But he didn't come in. Didn't gesture for you to move so he could get in, nothing. You two stood in this 'creep-off' until the home owner woke up and actually, genuinely, freaked out at the sight. Slamming the door shut, locking it, and scolding you heavily. You'd only answered the door because the knocking didn't stop, and you wanted to give the others some quiet. But of course you didn't say that.

For a while, whenever he'd come knocking, you'd answer. You know you'll get scolded again, same crash out from the owner, but you grew to look forward to the pale man showing up. He's the only man who doesn't speak of how creepy you are. Speaking of, he'd only show up like twice a week before you showed your face, and now that you have, it's evolved to the point where it's every night. Genuinely. The others pretty much cursed you for starting this.

In result, you slept during some of the day to have a pocket of energy for the man.

P.O.V. switch (Pale man)

But he grew impatient after a while. Once a day wasn't enough now. He missed you, the place where his heart should be would ache whenever the door shut. Part of his yearned to just break the door down now, and grab you. Or knock relentlessly until you opened it again. He didn't know why he felt the way he did, it was new and weird, but he chased it. You were perfect, to him anyway, but he didn't communicate that.

He knew this was strange to anyone else, but he's never not strange. He ended up coming up with a solution. When the door would be shut, he'd, very bluntly and obviously, stalk around the back of the house until he found the window that showed the room you resided in. it was empty, seems they want to keep you isolated during the night. What a shame, he could be in there with you. You look so lonely. He knew the house was pretty much empty besides you, the owner, and two others.

You'd see him, and once more, stare. He would always stare back, content to stand there until the sun rose. He would stand there until it was sunbreak, and then you blink (for once) and he's gone.

one day, FEMA came by. They spoke to the homeowner, and snatched the two people left in the house besides you and him. He took his chance, showing up at the door right after FEMA was gone. The homeowner wasn't alone, you were there, but for some reason the owner told your not so little admirer that he was alone. He'd given up hope, it seemed.

When he came in, and the miserable whimpers from the home owner came to a halt, he didn't know where you were until he focused. You were more silent than a cats footsteps most the time, so that made sense. The pale man came into the room you stayed in, smile stretched so abnormally anyone would think he had two fish hooks pulling his lips apart. Despite the unsettling smile, your wide, unblinking stare didn't falter. He stood there, pretty much gawking at you whilst you had one of your normal stare offs. He seemed to be cherishing the fact that for once, he wasn't going to be interrupted by a door AND he was in the same space as you.

He seemed less like a murderous visitor and more like a teenage boy at his first date unsure how to make the first move. Eventually, he stepped forward and slowly sat at the couch you were sitting on, not once breaking the eye contact. You two stayed like that for a while, neither of you wanted to make a move, until you eventually laid your head on his bare, boney shoulder.

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Starting off, he’s pretty educated so he knows what’s going on, and how to handle the medical side of things (supplying tampons or pads, painkillers, menstrual cups, ect)

But on the emotional side, he wasn’t as prepared as he thought he was. He bought chocolate and filled his pantry to be ready to cook for you if you wanted something cooked, and was thoughtful enough to save. A bit of money just to buy you take out. (He’s always had those savings building up since he laid his eyes on you)

He still wasn’t prepared though. After you finally moved in, and you eventually got your period, you managed to plot through the chocolate in under 24 hours, and he was in the kitchen making food like six times that day, and twice that night.

He had to make a secret trip to the shop when you were napping so he could keep giving you what you needed.

Was he shocked? Yes, 100%, but when he showed he was shocked by how much you ate he accidentally made you cry. Like fully bawl your eyes out because you thought you were fat.

He sobbed with you while trying to get you to stop.

You’re crying because you feel bad that he’s so busy cooking or shopping because of you? He’s stroking your head while you cuddle and kissing the side of your head repeatedly.

Now comes the fact of work. He does heavily consider calling sick for the whole week to be with you, but he knows he needs to pay the bills so that doesn’t happen. Whenever he is at work though, the house feels like a ghost town. So naturally, you either get bored or cry about being alone.

If you get bored, you end up going out, always likely heading to the mall. Whether it’s to see him or not is up to you, but you’re stupid if you think Austin wouldn’t take the chance to flirt with you if he saw you. You’re alone? Seriously? That’s stupid rare now that you’re dating Jacob. He’s GONNA flirt with you. IM SORRY.

It’s the obvious choice to just speed walk to the store Jacob works at. But if you don’t, Jacob kinda just shows up. Like he’s got life 360 on or something. He definitely tries to get you to stay with him during his shifts to avoid that happening again.

Anyway, I’m getting off topic.

Jacob stays by your side like a stick in the mud. Dude doesn’t really care actually, but in a loving way. Gets butt hurt if you get mad and shout or something, but it’s effective as he does stop being next to you. The peace doesn’t last long because like 20 minutes later he’s shyly coming up to you and apologising. Just to continue, yeah.

He’s also incredibly protective during this time of the month. He directly stares at any guy who tries to talk to you if you’re out, even if that guys just asking for help.

If it’s Austin? Just try to stop those two from meeting during this time, because Jacob probably WILL start a genuine fist fight with him. He almost did when he pulled you away from Austin during his work break.

He treats you like something absolutely fragile, not even putting on any horror movies before bed or during the night in worry of upsetting you.

But when you want it, movie nights happen immediately. Like..

“Jayy, I wanna watch psycho again..” “Got it, hon” and BOOM it’s somehow already playing, and he’s got a blanket in his hands.

LOVES watching some of his favourite films with you during this time, but sometimes you just don’t wanna watch his stuff and thats fine, he watches almost ANYTHING you put on, and doesn’t dare critique it.

<><><><><><><>

Murdoc

He's probably the one who started your relationship tbh

He's like, very into you. He doesn't show it all the time, but he really respects how much you deal with because of them.

Especially after he sees you managed to keep the band afloat during and after plastic beach, especially with the kidnapping thing

Tells everybody he's the person who makes the music videos and makes the collabs work, but knows you're the reason other celebrities haven't killed him or something

Not strictly a Murdoc thing, but the amount of fines you've faced due to them getting in to harms way, especially him, is diabolical.

Swears up and down most of them weren't his fault.

Gets hard when he sees you working on paperwork at your desk or just working hard in general he genuinely can't explain it

Gonna include this for everyone, but when ur having a lazy day or just a break, he’s dragging you to the Winnebago. You’re vibing doing nothing at your desk? You can vibe and do nothing in the Winnebago, now come on.

2D

Thinks he started your relationship but you did, he just wants to think he did when you bring it up.

Worries about you a lot, manages to get you to take a good amount of breaks. He is VERY persuasive

When he can't convince you to take a break, he heads out and comes back with your favourite drink or snack.

Feels really bad when he sees you working on any fines you got due to them, offers to figure them out for you. He doesn't know how to.

Not to mention he hangs around you a lot, always either rambling off with some story or being so quiet you forget he's there. It’s rarely in between.

When you don’t have a lot of work on some days, those days are spent with him in his or your room. He’s always sat close by you if you’re not cuddling in bed, or he’s in and out of the room getting you tea or snacks.

Russel

Always keeps such a good eye on you, lowkey has a spider sense for when you’re overworking or something.

When he catches you doing too much, he pulls you away. Not physically, but he finds a way to convince you.

He is very persuasive

Actually does your work for you sometimes, like when you're sleeping or just away, you come back to filled paperwork or sent emails. He’s the only one in the group who knows how to do it besides you

You've tried to tell him he doesn't need to do all that, but he insists you need a break

Tries his best to force the others to act right to avoid giving you any more work. Doesn’t really work unless he holds Murdoc by the back of his neck like a rowdy kitten

On days when you’re overloaded with work, he forces you to take a break while he does the rest of the work you couldn’t, but if you tell him you wanna do it he reluctantly agrees.

Even on your shared lazy days, sometimes you catching him sending your emails in his spare time. Like it’s sweet of him but come back to bed.

Noodle

Had a crush on you when she was a kid, cringes so bad when anyone mentions it and how it might be weird now that the two of you are together

Some days it really gets to her and she thinks she’s weird for it or gross, so it’s best to just comfort her. It’s obvious when since she kinda dials back on physical touch, especially in public. But won’t deny anything from you.

Thinks she's very lucky to have actually pulled you since she fully expected you to reject her feelings

Teaches you some Japanese for fun, doesn’t really give up but doesn’t go strict either. Depends on how bad you wanna learn.

On days where there’s no practicing or filming or anything band related, she doesn’t let you leave bed until she does, which is usually around 10am or later if she’s feeling lazy. Once out tho, she’s taking you to like, an arcade, maybe. Or just lounging in bed with her and watching some random movie. Doesn’t let you near your laptop or work desk to attempt and do your job on these days

Might be the only person in the band who LETS YOU DO YOUR JOB. Only offers a break when she sees you’re actually starting to run yourself off your feet.

Ace

Met you when he was replacing murdoc, and immediately starting thinking about your future wedding

He was smitten at first glance for sure

Like, hearts flying around his head and everything

The gang didn’t hear the end of it, like Ace would go on and on about you, from your eyes to your hair to like, everything. At one point he complimented your height and some of them had to leave the room.

You liked him, he didn't do any stupid shit that gave you problems (less than the others at least). So you started dating

He's out of the band now, but still visits the studio near every day. You live with him, you come home to him and everything. But he always misses you too bad, so he visits. It's starting to piss Murdoc off since he's distracting you from doing your work.

The band isn’t mad about him sticking around, only Murdoc sometimes.

He’s as clingy as a stray cat you fed one too many times.

Like in his visits, he’s sat on your desk watching you work, probably has a small bag of chips that he’s eating and getting crumbs everywhere. Either he’s sat, or he’s made room to lay on your desk with his feet swaying behind him while he watches you or talks to you.

Has yet to be kicked out, somehow. You’ve legit seen Murdoc with smoke pretty much shooting out of his ears because ace STILL hadn’t let you work, let alone left. Plus he leaves a mess almost everywhere he goes and you’re not the one who cleans it.

Crumbs. Crumbs fucking everywhere. Either crumbs or the sticky residue of soda on the wooden floor.

He’s got mixed feelings

Because on one hand, you don’t like him.

And the fact that you don’t love him back drives him insane. People are dying much more frequently because he’s furious every time he remembers. He kills them and just convinces himself that they were the person getting in the way of you and him.

If you wanna keep him around you’ve gotta find a way to calm him down when it gets too much and FEMAs around because he will attack them. He’s gonna get himself killed.

Once he killed that one FEMA agent, his ego boosted and he thinks he’s immortal or some shit.

Niche but could u imagine treating him like a slug in slugterra and pretty much hurling him at an agent-

But on another hand, you’re indulging him. You hit him, sneer, glare, mock, humiliate, the whole package. And he adores it.

It gets him so excited, acts bad on purpose in hopes you’ll “punish” him.

Acting bad includes bullying people, threatening them, or killing them sometimes, just for your attention.

And god, when he gets it? He is just ecstatic. You’ll be lowkey abusing him, slapping, pushing, everything.

When you give him a hit that was enough to make his head hit the ground, and you tug his hair to look at his face, he’s got the most perverted smile on his face. Whilst blood drips down his face.

He definitely whimpers during punishment, and moans, definitely. The most pathetic whimpers you’ll ever hear.

Has cum in his pants when you hit him way too many times.

Still follows you around like a bad smell. If you were thinking because you’re cold he’ll be distant or neglected, sorry to crush ur dreams but no.

Desperately clinging to your arm or hand, but if you scold him for it he’d try to keep his hands to himself. Tell him to crawl after you like a dog and he will, even put a collar and leash on him, especially a shock collar.

You actually just can’t get rid of him though, unless he ends up getting killed. But WHY would you want thattt??🙃

If we act like people in the house aren’t horrified or him, or a new guest is in and just doesn’t know about him, and mocks him about how he acts around you? Yeah population is decreasing. It’s gruesome too, like DONT enter the room they died in fr, just tell him to clean whatever mess he made. He only wouldn’t if he wanted you to hit him

About that, he goes against orders quite a bit in hopes you punish him. Thats usually how it ends up, and after that he behaves. But if you ever catch on and decide to ignore him, he loses it

Starts with offering for you to punish him, to pleading you to hit him, and it somehow evolves into him on his knees in front of you, hugging your legs and begging while he cries.

He’s VERY dramatic sometimes. Not often, but will whine just for you to cave and hit him, or sob until you give him what he needs. But genuine tears of frustration lots of the time.

<><><><><><<><><<><><><>

I think he'd manage to be clingy and distant at the same time, and a little desperate to actually have someone love him, but that's another story.

he'd tend to be next to you, but not right next to you. unless you put yourself close to him. he doesn't usually push that away, but he does get clammy hands and a bit shy.

it's been a while since he'd loved anybody, so he's pretty much a newbie to relationships again at this point, despite his age.

he'd be hesitant, and he'd work himself up to it, and eventually crack a joke to you. it was a dad joke, and honestly a basic one he thought he was clever for coming up with.

if you laugh, his confidence shoots up and he gets so giddy inside, though he's unable to think of another joke on the spot so he ends up laughing with you and going with the flow without keeping it going.

will likely make more jokes with you, most of them are dad jokes though. the fucking "Hi hungry, I'm your boyfriend" when you complain that you're hungry.

but if you don't laugh, or like just give him a pity chuckle, he pretty much curls in on himself in humiliation. he bites bit bottom lip hard in embarrassment and does the rubbing his neck thing and looking to the ground. yeah his face scrunches so bad.

would probably NEVER make a joke to your ass again. Unless he was given some strong liquid courage.

he's surprised he managed to get you to date him, and once he's comfortable around you he'd admit he didn't think you'd ever wanna be with a total hermit like him.

speaking of, since he's a hermit, you're dates are 100% at home, typically with ordered in dinner, and the couch. If you think you can change his hermit ass and get him to go to a restaurant, I'm sorry u can't. especially not if this is when visitors are around and the sun is doing a genocide route.

his cuddles are top tier though, typically big spoon too.

I imagine being with him during this pretty much apocalypse, it'd be like that paranoid married couple in some zombie kids movie.

Like say he let immortal guy in, and you see him walk in from the bedroom door you cracked open to spy from? and you heard the shit he was spouting? When he gets back to the bedroom it's filled with worried and weakly defensive whispers from both parties. loud whispering too on your part most the time.

"love, who the hell is that?" "didn't get his name. Hon, he's just staying a few days, he won't be trouble-" "but he's talking about him being immortal! you didn't see that as a red flag?" "I did, but honey, it can't just be the two of us here, you know what'll hap-" "you could've just let someone else in though! did it have to be mr "we all live forever??" *que him just giving in and agreeing, without actually kicking him out tho*

The day has been long, like longer than normal. He woke up to an issue between Grubber and Snake that he had to solve, then he got called by 2D to play some riffs since Murdoc was just magically sick with what must be the plague or a new covid strand, and he had to spend 30 damn minutes just trying to get the damn guitar tuned properly. And he was there for at least 5 hours playing riff after riff for these guys. Don't get him wrong, their great company, but it really hurt his hands, man.

Picture a normal day as that but minus the ache in his hands and guitar playing, and replace it with just a lot of laughing and causing trouble. So he was tired, almost the definition of sluggish.

The band eventually let him leave, and once he stepped out of Kong studios he grew aware of just how hot it had gotten in those hours inside. It was like opening an oven, when that first wave of heat hits you. And god must look down on him because his car was parked in the one spot with NO shade. He should've known better, it's summer after all. This must be karma for taking that old ladies purse in his teen years. Yes, that specifically.

So after actually screaming like a woman in trouble getting into his car, he sped out of the driveway and towards the closest ice cream place. Was he a grown man? yes. But he likes ice cream, who doesn't? Now, was it a little childish to get pink bubblegum flavor? not in his eyes.

As he pulled out of the driveway of the parlor, ice cream in hand, he ended up thinking about you, of all people. He wasn't confused though, he thought of you a lot. But it was as if god gave him an apology, because as he was driving home, he spotted you. Not doing anything, just sitting under the shade of a tree. You looked hot, in both ways, but mainly in the sweaty, clothes sticking to you way.

He didn't hesitate before making a very much illegal u turn and speeding back to the parlor be was just at, ice cream dripping down his fingers as he licked it clean, eyes on the road. He parked the car and almost tumbled out on the seat, keeping his ice cream above him as he ran back into the shop.

he walked out victorious, a cone of some 'Blue Moon' flavor, along with another cone of pink bubblegum for him since he ate his in order to hold yours. He 100% got you that flavor because of the pink and blue combo, but if you didn't like it he was willing to give you his.

He nearly tripped getting back into his car, again near screaming at the heat of his leather seat. The determination he felt must have outweighed his common sense to park in the shade. He paused when figuring out how he was gonna steer, but figured it out by holding his ice cream in his mouth and using his free hand to steer, keeping yours safe.

You couldn't not notice the speeding car that came to a screeching halt in front of your little spot, especially when the car drove again just to park a bit further up. Ace got out of the car on the side away from view, since he got a crazy brain freeze from holding ice cream in his mouth. He could he head whining as he crouched beside his car and desperately pressed his thumb to the roof of his mouth to try and ease it.

He did eventually step out from the side of the car, holding one nearly perfect blue ice cream and one messy pink one. He walked up to you with a confident bravado, as you fixed yourself to sit a bit less slouched. "Heya, I uh, got this for ya." He said, smiling that sly sharp smile as he passed the blue one to you, silently praying desperately that you liked this flavor, since he had no clue what flavor you liked.

Thankfully you did, and even seemed flattered as you took it from him "Aw, thanks Ace. I uh, I didn't take you as the kinda guy to go giving people ice cream." You couldn't help but tease him, and as expected, his bravado cracked a little and he stood a bit less confidently and a bit more nervously. "Well- uh- crap, I mean I saw ya sitting all by yourself so uh, I thought I'd help? help you out, I mean. With the heat."

"I get what you mean. You wanna sit with me?" Asking that was risky, for only one reason. He might just malfunction if he sits close to you. But he accepted anyway. "yeah, yeah yeah I do." He said a bit rushed, but stayed stood in his spot for at least 30 seconds before he caught himself and walked to your spot, sitting on like the very edge of the bench.

You'd be lying if you said that he wasn't being cute right now. To him though, he was fucking up everything royally. He was so tired, and he'd forgotten about the aching in his fingers. But he refused to worry you with it, and determined to have a sweet moment with you. It was quiet for a beat too long, him and you just having ice cream together. Too bad you weren't a fan of the awkwardness in the air.

"So, is that bubblegum flavor? Always took you as the type of guy to like mint." You commented, its not like it was hard to know that was bubblegum flavor, the blue and yellow marble texture that eventually made itself known was enough to go off of. He wasn't facing you totally, but the tips of his ears showed he was blushing. "uh, yeah- nah I'm not a mint fan. Just uh, just tastes like toothpaste." he replied, chuckling nervously after he spoke.

You chuckled a bit yourself, he was a grown man and still so nervous. "I get that. But uh, y'know, I always thought bubblegum was for kids?" "Hey! it's a good flavor!" He replied, snapping his head to the side to look at you. That got a good laugh out of you, laughing at his response as ice cream dripped down your fingers.

Your conversation went on, laughs and occasional loud, excited statements from Ace. If he was anything besides a rebel, he was for sure sweet. Just, not to anybody. But you weren't anybody, you were his crush. Have any of his past crushes gone well? no, but he was determined to make this one work, if he could even get the ship to sail in the first place.

<><><><><><><><><><><

8:27am, Fri

You don't remember when you passed out from exhaustion, but you do remember crying into your knees whilst gunshot after gunshot rang out. The dream you had was nowhere near pleasant either. You dreamt of them, everyone else, your friends, parental figures, all of them. Their screams played on repeat in that dream, could imagine their faces as they were killed. It was awful, you thought the outside world was bad. But in this house, everything is much worse than it is outside. Outside, whatever killed you didn't have some twisted, fucked up motive like he had. You just wish...

You were woken up suddenly by the opening of the door, and in the doorway was the homeowner. You didn't even get time to yawn before you felt the urge to ball up again at the sight of him. He had something in his hands, but you couldn't see properly from behind the lounge chair. you could smell though, as sadly it smelt good. He seemed hesitant himself, stepping further into the room only by a few steps, before you heard him clear his throat

"uh.. crap- Hey, I... brought your favorite. Waffles. I know you must still be tired." he sounded positive, but deep down he knew you weren't sleeping when he did what he did. The food was an apology, but a silent one. he looked around a little and cursed himself for not having a table in here. He walked forward and placed the plate on the arm rest of the chair you hid behind. "Just for you."

You could see him, he just stood there for a bit, but he took a few step back after a few seconds. You didn't want to eat anything he made, in fear that he'd tampered with it or something. But if you didn't get up, would he kill you too?

in even more fear of that, you hesitantly rose to your feet, still staying on your side of the chair. "There you go, hi. You doing okay? You look exhausted." Was that some kind of joke? "Here, I put your favorite spread on it too." he said as he picked the plate back up and put it on the arm rest on your side, not afraid to get close to you despite you stepping back. Looking at the waffles, it seemed the smell was the only thing somewhat appetizing about it. It looked bad, but time obviously went into it. The spread was about as even as it could get on a waffle, but the waffle itself seemed just like the top piece of bread with dents in it or something

"What's wrong? You seem upset?" He spoke again, and when you looked up to meet his eyes despite that gut feeling that said not to, he seemed confused, as if you should be happy. You felt scared, and unsure, and sick, but for some reason you felt the need to speak up. "Are you.. serious? are you kidding? You fucking killed everyone- why wouldn't I be upset? why.. why did you do that..?" You wanted to sound angrier, but your fear made your voice shake and you ended up saying that whole thing like a whining dog that got hit. Hell, you even looked like a scared dog for fuck sake.

He didn't respond, as if trying to figure out how to respond. His heart cracked at your state, and something tugged at him to figure out how to make you happy. But why wouldn't you be happy? This is so much better, so much safer than before. Weren't you grateful? Did he do something wrong? He was already stepping way out of his shell walking in and giving you breakfast like your boyfriend, but you didn't seem to appreciate it.

"Love, they.. they had to die, they would've hurt you. You said they made you uncomfortable in the first place. They were visitors." he answered, eyebrows furrowed in utter confusion at your fear. The realization that you were scared made him act before you could respond.

"oh, love, come here. You shouldn't be scared. There's nothing to be scared of, I'm here." He said in a softer voice, albeit nervous to be so forward as he stepped forward and made a gesture with his hand to sit on the chair. That's the problem.. you're here... you thought, though you froze at the unexpected forwardness, still scared of this man. But for some reason you sat anyway, moving on shaky legs and with a pair of wide eyes, but you did. Your own fear was going to be your downfall, you swear it.

When you sat down, he sat on the arm of the chair and put an arm around your shoulders, rubbing your shoulder hesitantly. You could feel the shakiness of his hand, though you froze yourself at the touch. "It's.. It's okay, love, it'll be okay. We'll be okay. You just.. eat your waffles, okay?" He said in a poorly done attempt of a calming voice, reaching over to grab the plate of waffles and putting them in your lap. You're sure he did have a nice soothing voice, but you couldn't listen to that side of your brain in a situation like this. instead, you felt your bottom lip tremble as you held back crying at how overwhelmed you were, and picked up the fork.

"There you go. now, I haven't done anything wrong, so why are you so sad?" he asked, his thumb rubbing up and down on your shoulder as you chewed hesitantly, swallowing and hesitating before speaking up "because, you.. you killed everyone, why wouldn't I be upset.." "I explained already. They were visitors." "no they weren't-" "Shh. shh, love, you don't know that. visitors are tricky, but I'm here to keep you safe. that's why you need to be here with me." He put the cap on that quickly, her voice still nervous but soothing in a subtly fake way. You bit your cheek and decided to keep eating, out of fear that he'd get upset. But he'd never get upset, not at you. Never at you.

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do uh, do you guys like it? I'm sorry it's short :/

he was surprised when you accepted his feelings, he was so confident he was just gonna make a fool out of himself when he confessed.

keep in mind, he's old. this is a middle aged man we're talking about, he's snoozing by 8pm. passes out at 10pm if you keep him up.

wishes he could stay up later to have fun like he used to, especially if you were on the younger side. He feels like he's not a good enough partner, or that you should just leave him for someone younger.

sometimes sits and admires you, wondering how the fuck you actually said yes to dating him. Usually gazes at you from afar but has had you held close to him when he does a few times. Stops if you get embarrassed though.

definitely treasures you, like you have his whole heart. doesn't seem like the guy to be like this, but he's devoted. in his own, silent middle aged man way.

gives you his drinks if you want them, which definitely says something. But also scolds you if you get drunk often. always going on about how you gotta take care of yourself after he snatched the bottle from you.

is he for the daddy issues ppl? absolutely

got drunk with you one night and started slow dancing with you in the living room (Very clumsily may I add) with you stood on his feet whilst he thinks he's doing good at leading.

the homeowner would be sick of you guys if he didn't see Bar guy as a friend.

I said this in the last one, but if anything happened to you and you were gone, he'd totally just isolate. like fully back to square one, downing drinks every night, everything. also would definitely curse anyone out if they mentioned you. and would silently cry at night if the room was empty, and drunkenly cry whether there were people or not

I'm not gonna leave you on a depressing note tho

if you like to ramble, he'd just sit there and cop it as you rambled on and on. he was honestly interested, and soaked up everything you said like an information sponge

also a bit of a malewife. whatever you say, goes. If you're telling someone to shut up or anything, he's either glaring at the person you're scolding or seconding your argument by adding on, in a more salty tone.

Starting a lil blunt, yk just splashing you with the cold water before warming you up to it. He is very much the definition of stalker, he never takes his eyes off of you, never lets you go anywhere without him (Whether you know or not is up to you), knows everything about you, just covers every base.

Seriously he’s caught up with everything about you, from your music taste to the small things like how much you complain about the heat of the day to day, hell he somehow figured out your favourite super hero (you’ve never even mentioned them around him)

The amount of times you’ve woken up to him at your door staring and just shitting yourself at the sight is a high number of times. Like it’s concerning.

Every time you test him for signs he gets so clingy about it, when you check his hands he insists if you hold his hands you’ll get a better view, or if your checking his eyes he doesn’t break eye contact.

He’s completely clean, not a visitor sign in sight. Which only makes it more worrying when he confesses to killing that tall man you invited in not a few nights ago, just because “he seemed to really like you”.

If you get mad about it, which would be the natural reaction, he starts falsely apologising and begging you to hit him as punishment, even getting on his knees. If you do, he starts giggling and hugging your legs, blood leaking from his nose.

Gets rock hard at the sight of you, but gets like painfully hard if he notices he’s got a bruise from you or some scar.

If you two start dating, because by some miracle you find him attractive, he now won’t even let you get like 5 feet from him. He’s always like right behind you, of nesting his head on your shoulder or something.

Stares at anyone who dares talk to you about anything other than small talk. I hate to break it to you, he’s killed more people in your house than any visitor has.

FEMA tried to take him one time and actually bit one of the soldiers necks so hard he ripped their neck in half, all because they dared to try and take him from you. Though he was lucky it was one soldier, because he probably would have been shot otherwise. he made it seem like it was just that Pale man’s doing, and walked back inside like a proud puppy, soaked in blood.

Now, one might think me silly for assuming he’d be so violent, as I’ve seen people assume he’s all bark no bite, but I assure you this man is a walking threat. I am no fool m’lady, I am a genius. He may be unfit but he is so far in love he has killed without mercy. And don’t be fooled, he fully expects praise afterwards. But he has no idea how he’s suddenly so skilled in the art of murder himself.

The people in your house are fucking horrified btw, like coming to your house for shelter was the worst idea they’ve ever had. Most people who you let in now see him behind you and whip up some quick polite change of opinion and run away.

But in his eyes, nobody else matters. Fuck them, they can find somewhere else to run to, you aren’t alone with him around so it doesn’t matter. Does FEMA keep coming around to take him? Yes, but you just hand them another person in your home that shows signs and call it a day.

If it’s especially hot one day, and your AC just isn’t cutting it, he will seriously fan you with a fan or a book or something. Like crouched beside you and fanning you for hours, won’t dare complain about his arms growing sore. You feel kinda bad so you tell him to stop, he only listens because he’d consider himself a failure if he disappointed you.

Will do ANYTHING for you, you could’ve guessed that from the previous hcs, but really, he’d jump on one leg and sing for your amusement like some jester. Bit much, but in his eyes nothing is too much if it’s for you. The boy would probably fight fucking Thanos for you.