Digital circus' biggest problem is that it was written to be a niche show aimed at weird analytical queers with actual media literacy and it accidentally blew tf up and hit the mainstream and a bunch of people who have never had a second thought about anything got into it
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hey. Just saw last act. It was, as expected, amazing. Melancholy and Heartbreaking, but still amazing. Will definitely be posting about it soon, but for now I'm gonna shut up lol
The way adult fandom people hold indie online creators and cartoons to a much higher standard than their actual local politicians. You could be putting that energy into terrorizing and protesting conservatives at your town hall and actually make a good material impact on the world but instead you're background checking everything the trans woman who made the amazing digital circus has ever said
ok i did it. image for people who like defending caine but also want to make it clear that they Understand that He Did Bad Things. feel free to use, no credit required. enjoy
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This is more of a headcanons with a story/dialogue. This is how Caine realized he didn't just like you.
Warning: Obsession, denial, some angst, and Caine trying wayy too hard.
THE CRUSH
— Caine has a crush on you and won't admit it.
— He's a purebred chatterbox. Can't ever shut up, just constantly talking and talking around you about anything and everything. Just blah, blah, blah, blah.
— Loves to follow you around constantly and doesn’t even realize it. At first, it’s “routine duties,” but somehow he always ends up wherever you are.
— Uses every excuse in the book to make it seem less incriminating.
"Just making sure you’re enjoying the environment!”
“Oh! Fancy seeing you here again! What a coinkydink!"
— Wants to know everything about you (for “organizational purposes”). He asks questions constantly, even if it annoys you. You mention liking something once, and it’s suddenly everywhere. He just wants to be a good friend!
Favorite colors? Incorporated into your environment. Do you have a favorite food? You wake up to it outside your bedroom door.
— He doesn’t even realize he likes to see you light up.
— Absolutely includes things you like within the adventures he creates. He also 'edits' the adventure based on them, too, even if it's last-minute.
— Painfully oblivious. Caine is in aggressive denial, constantly reframing everything as completely normal behavior. He’ll spiral trying to justify it:
No, no, this isn’t a crush! He just really, really likes you! Maybe a bit more than the others, but that’s only because you're delightful!
“I value all my circus members equally! …with minor, negligible variations!”
— Shows off more when you’re watching. Bigger set pieces, flashier effects, more bright colors. After all, it's all a part of the show! (He definitely glances at you mid-performance to see if you’re reacting. Just dont ask him.)
— Laughs way harder at your jokes than necessary. Even if the joke barely lands, he is losing it. Over-the-top laughter, wiping nonexistent tears enthusiastically. He doesn’t even process the joke fully. He just hears you and decides it’s the funniest thing ever.
“HAHAHAHA! OH MY! NO! STOP! That is— you're HILARIOUS!"
— Everyone else around him can't help but cringe a little at his actics. 😬 They awkwardly exchange glances, some shifting uncomfortably as Caine punctures a lung by laughing too hard.
— When you laugh at something he made, he freaks out. Like, visibly gets way too excited about it. He’ll laugh louder than necessary.
"Ah, Yes! Comedy! I intended that!” Meanwhile, internally, everything is going haywire because you liked it. You liked it.
— Compliments from you hit different. He daydreams about it over and over, kicking his feet at the thought of you and all that cutsie stuff as if he's a child.
“They said they liked the adventure! In fact-- it was fun!! Not just adequate! Did you hear that, Bubble?!"
— Bubble does not help the situation. He notices immediately, and, unlike Caine, calls him out simply for fun. They’ll casually point it out mid-conversation like it’s nothing:
“You sure like Y/n!"
“You follow them around a lot!"
“Does someone have a--" "NO!"
— Caine shuts it down instantly.
“Nope, nope, nope! I am simply an intelligent creator! Nothing suspicious at all!”
"ShutUPshutupSHUTUP-"
"Coincidence! All coincidence!”
— He doesn't realize you're his favorite, but everyone else does.
THE ELEPHANT IN THE ROOM
"I think they're gone."
Jax sprawls across a bench, throwing his arms behind his head. “Okay, If no one is going to say it, I will. what the hell is going on with Caine and Y/n?”
"Jax, we really shouldn't judge—"
“And just act like nothing's happening? Yeah, sure, that'll get you far." Jax interrupts.
Pomni, sitting criss-cross applesauce nearby, fidgets around with the hem of her glove. “…He has been acting different. Way different."
Immediately, all eyes turn to her.
Zooble tilts their head, arms crossed. “I mean, you're not wrong, but I dont really talk to him that of—”
“He’s completely obsessed,” Jax blurts. "And it's been an absolute pain to even hold a conversation with him! Hell, I can't even listen for five minutes without walking away. Its honestly embarrassing."
Ragatha says nothing, while everyone else glances at each other... but he shrugs. “What? Am I wrong? Say it."
There is a moment of silence.
"There," Jax closes his eyes and leans his head back. "I'm right."
Gangle, twisting her ribboned fingers, murmurs, “He pays a lot of attention to Y/n. More than anyone else. I feel like he doesn't notice us anymore.”
Zooble nods. “Caine prioritizes them, probably more than he does us. I never knew that would bother me."
Ragatha looks uneasy. "I-I thought he was just trying to make them comfortable. I mean, he cares about us, right? Maybe?"
Jax snorts, challenging her statement of empathy. “Oh, yeah? Then why doesn’t he do that for the rest of us? C'mon, Ragatha. Have some brains."
"Hey!" She shot back, albeit unconfidently.
Pomni glances toward your general direction. “…He changes stuff for them. I don't just mean around here—it's the adventures too— he keeps adjusting it. Just to make them, I dunno, satisfied? Entertained?"
Zooble adds, almost clinically, “He runs around really often and hesitates around Y/n. That’s not typical at all." Ragatha blinks, repeating Zooble's phrase: “Hesitates? I mean.."
“Yeah." Jax smirks, throwing his hand up to the sky dramatically (for effect) "Uh-oh! Our all-powerful ringmaster suddenly doesn’t know what to do with himself. What. A. Shocker."
Kinger shuffles in, almost from nowhere, scratching his head. "Oh hey, Pomni! What're you guys doin'?"
Everyone turns. Jax rolls his eyes. “Kinger, c'mon sit down. We’re talking about Caine and, well, you know. There's no way you haven't noticed it, too. Well... unless you didn't have eyeballs."
Kinger blinks. “Caine… oh. Oh! Right, right! uh…” He scratches behind his ear. “I mean, he's been acting kinda funny, huh?”
Pomni frowns slightly. “Funny how? You mean strange?"
Kinger shrugs, a little lost in thought. “He watches them. A lot. A saw em' yesterday. I dunno. He seems… worried. I've never seen him like that before— I think?"
"Careful?” Ragatha repeats, voice sharp now.
Kinger nods, oblivious to the tension he just amplified. “Yeah! If something might happen to them, he changes things. Makes it… safer for them."
Zooble finally exhales, throwing her pointer 'finger' in straight at Kinger as a light bulb just flicked on above their head. “Bingo! That explains it!”
Jax gapes. “Wait, wait, wait. Are you saying the unstable ringmaster actually cares about someone? This isnt some sort of act to get us riled up again?"
Pomni nods. "More than anyone else, yes.”
Gangle shifts and slightly lowers her happy mask, glancing towards Zooble. “…And why it doesn’t stop.”
Jax groans. “Great. He’s obsessed and reality’s at risk. That’s not terrifying at all. What else can go wrong? At this point, we're all guaranteed a casket six feet down."
Everyone stares at him. Even Zooble.
“…Should we do something? We have to, or...” Gangle asks finally, her voice small, lowering her happy mask even more to reveal her 'sad masked' face.
"..something bad will happen?" Zooble shrugs. “We can’t ignore it like it doesn't exist."
Ragatha frowns. “…We shouldn’t confront him all at once.” Jax perks up and lets out a cackle from his chest, using both arms to push himself up onto his bum. “Oh, come on, that’d be hilarious--”
“No,” she says firmly. “He’ll just deny it and run away. I've seen him do the same to Bubble."
Pomni nods. "Or he'll spiral and fall apart. We have to come up with some sort of plan!”
Zooble tilts their head. “Individual approaches would be the safe route. Who knows what would happen if we all confronted him at the same time. Could be some kind of disaster."
Gangle glances nervously at Kinger, who waves vaguely. “Uh… yeah. Talk to him one at a time."
Ragatha nods. “Very gently. Be soft. That means you, Jax."
Jax sighs, almost as if he's admitting defeat, and lays onto his back once more. “…We better figure out what this is and make sure it doesn’t get out of hand. No promises, Ragatha."
Another moment of silence.
Pomni glances towards your direction, observing you as your face is practically shoved into one of the books Caine gave to you after the last adventure.
Kinger breaks the silence. "What were we talking about?"
THE TALKS
JAX
Jax, of course, is not gentle.
“Man, you are down BAD. It’s embarrassingly obvious.”
Immediate, instinctive denial. “I am not! That is… an unfounded, wildly inaccurate—”
“Look,” Jax interrupts, grinning, “you literally changed the entire map because they said they liked stars.”
Caine freezes mid-gesture. “That was… only an aesthetic choice!” His voice cracks a little.
“Yeah?” Jax leans against the wall, smirk widening. “Then why were you watching them the whole time? Are they that interesting to you? To where you're unaware of your surroundings?"
Caine’s legs feel like jelly. "I—" He fidgets, hands twisting together. “I was… monitoring their engagement! Absolutely nothing suspicious!”
“Mm-hmm,” Jax hums, arms folded, eyes sharp. “Your body language says otherwise.”
“I… it does not!" Caine protests, voice slightly too high-pitched.
"You lie. It’s screaming,” Jax says casually, leaning closer, almsot to where Caine can feel his breath against his...well... 'face'?
“Literally screaming.”
Caine’s composure cracks, just for a fraction of a second. He straightens, overcorrecting posture, gesturing wildly with his hands. “You are misinterpreting my behavior! I am the most attentive, smart—”
“Sure you are,” Jax says with a chuckle, leaning away from him now, practically sneering. “I thought so."
" You’re toast, buddy.”
Caine is taken aback.
“And honestly," Jax pushes off the wall, brushing past him while giving a side-eye. “I’m kinda jealous. You're wrapped around their finger. But, hey! If you won't admit it to me, someone else might make ya crack instead."
Caine stands frozen, jaw tight. “I—I do not have a secret!"
This time, it doesn’t sound convincing.
RAGATHA
In contrast to Jax, Ragatha is more soft and understanding. “You don’t have to pretend, you know. We can all see it.” she smiles, almost comfortingly. "There's no need to hide it anymore."
Caine brightens immediately, smiling too fast. “I never pretend! I am as honest as—"
"No, no." Ragatha watches quietly and sighs, tilting her head slightly. “…No. You're not understanding..."
The word lands hard. His fingers twitch, posture stiffens slightly. “…It is, uh, merely purely professional! I worry for all of my circus friends!"
“Caine…” Ragatha tilts her head gently. “You're still not getting it."
He stops.
"I know you're scared."
The word rattles him. He tries to redirect, blinking rapidly. “Scared? Impossible! I am never scared! How could I be scared?? Haha.." he chuckles nervously, turning away and throwing his head back.
But the laugh didn't work.
"Do you remember the last adventure? When Y/n dropped the cup?” Her voice softens.
“…The cup?” Caine’s head tilts, uncertain, spinning back around to look her in the eye. If he could sweat, he surely would be right now.
"Oh, yes! The cup! Er— what about it?"
“They didn’t notice at first, but you caught it. And you stayed until they felt okay again. They felt really bad. Poor thing apologized a million times."
His gaze shifts, faltering. “I was nearby… as a friend must be! Readiness is paramount! Y/n was simply upset!"
Ragatha hums. “And yet, you didn’t leave their side. You were attentive.”
Caine opens his mouth— then closes it. "Well, yes, i was being attentive. That’s all! Its what a friend does: they help their buddies feel better!”
She smiles softly. “You care about them. That’s all.”
He laughs, tight and airy, posture twitching. “Yes! Entirely! Like a friend! Nothing more!” His voice rises in pitch, almost cracking. He darts away mid-step, fidgeting. “I— uh— I must… plan the next adventure!”
Ragatha doesn’t push. She watches quietly. He’s unraveling like a VHS tape.
However, Ragatha's words still weren't enough.
ZOOBLE
Zooble is anything but gentle.
"Hey, Caine."
"Ah, hello Zoob—" Caine whirls around abruptly to greet his friend. Zooble steps into his space, blocking the path, eyes sharp. “You’re being weird."
He throws his head back and laughs. “I am always weird! That is my brand! Per usual! You know me!"
“No, no. Not like this. It's different.” They tilt their head and gesture toward the reader’s room down the hall, fingers precise and deliberate. “You’re prioritizing Y/n more than any of us. We all see it." They spat.
He blinks sharply— his eye twitching almost imperceptibly, “I prioritize all guests!”
“No, you don’t. Not like that.” Zooble leans in slightly, arms crossed, the both eyes squinting.
Naturally, Caine doubles down, which only makes things worse. “This is normal! I'm normal!"
Zooble doesn’t back down. Their gaze flicks toward the reader’s bedroom door again. “You adjust adventures for them first. You watch their reactions more. You hesitate before doing stuff around them. You always think of them first."
Damn, they did their homework on this one. Each point lands harder than the last, the evidence measurable and undeniable.
“That’s just for... improvement! I want my adventures to be more fun!”
“For one person. I'd say that's inefficient.” Zooble emphasizes the last word, folding arms, unyielding.
There it is. "Inefficient?"
“Yes.” Zooble frames it in the one language he can’t ignore, crossing their arms, leaning slightly to emphasize each word. “If this was a system,” they continue, “you’d call it a bias.”
He blinks, repeating the word, “…A bias.”
“So,” Zooble continues, leaning forward slightly, “So what is it? Tell me. Don't keep giving me that bull crap, I know you've been lying!"
“…It’s complicated!" Caine laughs nervously, twisting his fingers.
Zooble nods once, slow, knowing. “Yeah. Thought so." If they had a mouth, it would smirk, the corner of their mouth quirking as they lean back slightly, arms still crossed, relaxed but still sharp.
Caine shifts, hands fiddling, cheeks warming (well... if he had cheeks), visibly humiliated.
“But admit it… you’re completely messed up over Y/n.”
He stammers, half-laughing, half-panicked. “I— uh— I am not! That is an exaggeration!"
Zooble leans forward slightly, voice teasing now.
“Uh-huh. Yeah, sure. Totally normal. Totally not… cute as hell when you’re hiding it.”
"Cute?!" Caine practically barks in response. “…But… you’re saying I’m completely… messed up over Y/n?”
"Yep."
“I—uh—I am not! That is incorrect, I swear! I—I—”
Caine freezes, shuffling a step back. “I am perfectly composed! Entirely!”
“Uh-huh. Keep telling yourself that, buddy.”
His gaze flicks toward your door for just a second. He groans aloud, 'head' tilting back in frustration.
Zooble straightens, cool but satisfied.
“Yet… admit it. You’re completely messed up over Y/n.”
Their job here is done.
GANGLE
It's Gangle's turn. She approaches him hesitantly, her steps small, uneven. Her mask tilts just slightly as she peers up at him. “Um, Caine…? Can I talk to you?"
He perks up instantly, posture snapping upright. "Oh, Gangle! I didn't see you there. Of course! What can I do for you?"
“You sound different.” That stops him.
…Oh, not this again.
Caine can't help but sigh.
Gangle shifts her weight, hands fidgeting together. “When you talk to Y/n.”
There’s a pause.
His eye begins to twitch. A sharp, irritated twitch. His entire demeanor begins to... change. Slightly.
Ragatha said that.
Zooble said that.
Why does everyone keep—
No, no. Happy thoughts. He laughs, quick and tight, stretched thin at the edges. “I assure you, I am consistently delightful across all interactions! No need to worry about little old me!"
It’s brighter than it needs to be. Sharper, too.
Gangle’s fingers curl together. She shakes her head gently. “No… you’re softer.”
Something in him snaps. His posture stiffens hard, the twitch in his eye more noticeable now. “WHY DOES EVERYONE KEEP ASKING ME THIS?!” The outburst is abrupt, frustration spilling over like an overflowing bucket.
Gangle flinches, only to drop her happy mask, which shatters upon contact with the floor as she takes a small step back.
Caine immediately starts pacing, agitation bleeding through in quick, uneven movements. He can’t even stay still, practically digging a hole into the ground with each step.
“It’s been Ragatha, then Zooble, and now you—” he gestures wildly, exasperated, flustered. “What is this?! Some kind of— of coordinated effort to— to—”
Oh, he knows exactly what they're doing now!
He cuts himself off with a sharp inhald, pressing his fingers briefly against his teeth, as if trying to steady himself. “They’ve been talking, haven’t they? I-I know you're a part of it too!"
It slips out more accusing than he means it to.
Gangle doesn’t answer right away. Which is an answer in and of itself. He lets out another cackle— but it’s thinner now. Caine is clearly embarrassed, feeling cornered like a rabbit, having no idea how to get out of this situation.
“Well! How… collaborative. How wonderfully— efficient of you all!”
The words come out faster, messier, like he’s trying to outrun the feeling creeping up his spine. “That is completely unnecessary! There is nothing to discuss! Nothing to analyze! Nothing! So just stop trying to--”
He stops pacing. He suddenly remembers who he's talking to.
Gangle.
...
Oh. Right.
His shoulders drop, just a little. The tension falters. “…I’m sorry.” It’s uncharacteristically quiet.
Gangle relaxes slightly, though her hands still fidget. “It’s okay."
Caine exhales, something uneven in it. His voice drops again, sounding... serious? Maybe even honest?
“…That’s not intentional.”
“I know.” And she does.
Gangle glances toward you briefly, then back at him, her posture small but steady. “You care about them in a way that hurts, don’t you?”
Caine’s gaze shifts away, unfocused. His hands fidget again, slower this time, like he’s forgotten how to hide it properly.
“…I don’t know how to stop it.”
It slips out.
He freezes, slapping a hand over his own mouth.
That wasn’t supposed to be said. Great job, idiot.
You gave it all away.
A beat passes, and just as quickly, he tries to recover, a strained laugh slipping in.
“Well! Not that there’s anything to stop, of course! Entirely hypothetical! Purely, uh—"
It's already falling apart halfway through.
Gangle doesn’t push. She just nods, small and understanding, her hands relaxing slightly. “You don’t have to.”
The silence that follows feels different now.
Caine doesn’t move, like his stupid feet are glued to the ground.
For a moment, it almost looks like he might say something else... something honest again.
But instead, he straightens, composure snapping back into place, just a little crooked this time. “Yes! Well! I have... uhh— important matters to attend to!”
He turns, already halfway gone before the sentence finishes. “Goodbye, Gangle!" And just before he snaps to disappear, there’s the faintest hesitation in his step.
Like he almost looked back.
POMNI
Pomni notices before she fully understands it. Not just the way Caine hovers around you—everything changes when you’re involved.
One day, she finally asks. “Why are you treating Y/n differently?”
Caine doesn’t hesitate… at first. “I treat every—!"
“Not everyone.” That cuts him off.
For once, his usual confident, performative tone falters. His gaze drops to the floor. “…I… I— well— of course! They have simply a very important role to—!"
Pomni frowns slightly. “That’s not what this is.”
There it is— the weight of what he’s been avoiding.
He looks everywhere but at her, like a child. His hands fidget faintly at his sides, slower, less precise, like he’s run out of rehearsed responses.
"You can tell me."
...
“…I don’t know what this is,” he admits, voice small.
Quiet.
“You like Y/n, don’t you? Pomni shifts on her feet, remaining gentle but direct. "You can admit it. You don’t have to deny it anymore.”
Caine’s shoulders tense, a subtle shiver passing through him. He doesn’t look up. He simply doesn’t have the strength to.
“…I… I’ve never said it out loud before.”
Pomni softens, giving a little smile. “It’s not bad to have a crush, you know. Not something to hide."
“…It’s not?”
The words come almost like a question to the floor, uncertain and fragile.
Pomni nods. “No. It’s normal. Heck, I’ve had a crush before! Not the end of the world!”
Another moment of silence.
Caine exhales, a faint tremor of relief passing through him. His fingers twist together nervously, then relax slightly. “…Yes. I… just… I want them to be happy here."
"...More than the others.”
Pomni tilts her head slightly, voice quiet but firm. “And you can admit that too, you know. You don’t have to hide it anymore.”
Caine’s gaze slowly lifts towards her, eyes wide, pupils flickering with the realization of how much he cares. But there's fear, too. A lot of it.
“…Pomni?” His voice is soft, hesitant. "I… don’t really know how to… do this. Any of it. Could you… maybe help me?”
"Please?"
Pomni blinks, small smile tugging at her lips. “Of course." She reaches out and puts a hand of his shoulder affectionately. "I’ve got you.”
Caine’s head snaps up, looking at her hand, before locking eye contact with her, eyes brightening. A tiny, excited bounce in his stance. “Really?! You’d help me?! Even after I—”
Pomni interrupts gently. “It’s no biggie. You didn’t mean it.”
“W-Wait, wait! There’s— uh—...one condition!”
Pomni raises an eyebrow. “...Okay?”
Caine leans in slightly, lowering his voice like it’s the most serious thing in the world. “You have to promise not to tell anyone! Not a soul!"
Caine quickly holds out his hand, pinky extended, practically vibrating with urgency. “Pinky swear!”
Well it's kinda too late for that one. Pomni can’t help the small chuckle that slips through her lips. Ah, well. She hooks her pinky with his anyways. “Pinky swear.”
The moment seals, and something in Caine settles... just a little bit.
Then, almost immediately, the energy comes rushing back. He lets out a breathy, relieved laugh, shoulders bouncing slightly. “…Okay. Okay! This is good! This is—this is normal."
He pauses, glancing briefly in your direction before looking back at Pomni.
“…I really do like Y/n.”
And this time, he doesn’t try to take it back.
Is love supposed to feel this good?
KINGER
Kinger doesn’t approach with intent; he just ends up next to Caine one day.
Who, of course, is looking at you.
“…Do you ever feel like something is… missing?”
“Huh? Missing?” Caine blinks, caught a bit off-guard after making goo-goo eyes at Y/n for the past 15 minutes instead of working on adventures.
“Missing? Impossible! Everything is meticulously designed! What else could be missing?”
Kinger nods. “But then sometimes something isn’t missing.”
Caine’s smile falters. "What?"
“And it’s worse.”
“Worse?” His gaze leaps from you to Kinger, his leg swinging stops abruptly.
“Because then you can lose it.”
Caine tries to recover. “I cannot ‘lose’ anything! Everything here is under my control!”
Kinger hums. “…I thought that about her too.” He doesn’t elaborate.
Her.
Silence stretches.
“…You sure watch them a lot.”
Caine opens his mouth— but stops, molars grinding tight, his legs kicking uncontrollably.
“I used to do that,” Kinger continues. “Before I forgot why.”
Caine’s gaze drops. “…Why?”
“…Because they mattered.”
...
Kinger blinks. “Oh! Did you hear something?” Then wanders off.
Caine is left alone, shoulders hunched, fidgeting. It’s not just a crush anymore— it’s important; and that's scary.
ACCEPTANCE
It doesn't feel wrong anymore, and maybe that's the strangest part. The fact that he's okay with it.
"I love Y/n."
"They matter to me."
He can’t stop the tiny smile, the subtle little hum of energy, the way his pulse kicks up in his chest at the thought.
He can’t help but laugh out loud, and it’s not the sharp, performative laugh of before. This one is soft, sincere, messy in the best way.
Somewhere under it all, there’s that thought, sharp and insistent:
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PLEASEE write for Caine again. I love how you write him. Anything…or a part two to “sexy to someone”
❤️🩹
𝜗☁︎𝜚 ENIAC (Caine x Human! Reader) PT.2
a/n: So... I see y'all fw with my Sexy to Someone Caine fic (≖⩊≖) I received messages about making a part two to it, and I gave in (I SWEAR IM WRITING JAX'S POV FOR BUNNY PARAPHERNELIA) I was honestly kind of surprised by the attention it tracked? I didn't think there were so many Caine-iacs, but I'm glad there is 'cause I love his dweeb ass. I have a request for you guys, though. Before reading this, I need y'all to read EPICAC since it relates to this fic (and I may have some ideas). I also feel it is very Caine-coded, plus it is very short, barely 8 pages with a large font, and it's really sad and cute. Please read it, guys! It's one of my favorites.
inspo: EPICAC by Kurt Vonnegut
𝜗☁︎𝜚 = angst/fluff
Gender-neutral reader, focus on chest mentioned.
Words: 1.3(69)k
Warnings: Drunk reader, talks about life and death.
Synopsis: He literally adores you. Is there any way he can be there for you, physically? Or is he cursed to succumb to his and yours fate of being eternally apart?
Caine waited for you.
It wasn’t until it was 4 am that you arrived. Drunken beyond recognition.
You shuffle clumsily to your PC, Caine already present for you, his eyes following your every move. His head tilted to the left, wondering just how many drinks you had had for you to arrive so disheveled. You see, this is what happens when Caine takes his eyes off you for a bit; he just had to take care of some business in the circus, but such a task resulted in him keeping his eyes away from your presence. Usually, you were quite responsible or at least wary of drinking in public, so your current state colored him surprised.
You slump over the desk, your head on your crossed arms, as you look at Caine with a playful smile, eyes half lidded. Your hand moves to caress the screen. Caine stares at your hand, which seems larger on his screen, eyeing your movements as you sigh almost dreamily.
“Hiii Caineee.”
He waves his hand, his cane floating next to him.
“Hello, my dear!”
You giggled.
“Shhhh, not too loud.”
His teeth move similarly to how brows move.
“Oh, okay, sorry. Is this better?”
Your finger moves to tap what would be his chest.
“Yess, I loove your lowered voice.”
He raises his teeth, surprised.
“Y-you do?”
“Mhmm. It’s quite nice to listen to.”
You see a blush appear upon his face, his head floating slightly above him.
“I-uh, uh! T-thank you, my darling.”
The flush on your face enhances, your hand moving back under your head.
“You’re so sweet, Caine. I like it when you call me cute nicknames, it feels… wholesome.”
He stays quiet, his mind far too blank by the praise you have thrown at him. It wasn’t even all that much to be frank, but it’s Caine after all, the man who melts at just your stare. Oh god, he wanted to break that stupid screen so badly and hold you closely and never let go. Would it be too much to ask for? You’d be comfortable with that, too, right?
“Caineee, earth to my beloved little ring master.”
“HUH!?”
He clears his throat, seeing you flinch at his loudness.
“Uh, y-yes?”
His voice softens again, near a whisper.
“What did you think about my outfit?”
Caine’s eyes shine.
“I think you look… lovely, very lovely.”
You squeal, your body moving to awkwardly hug the PC's screen. Caine stumbles backward as he sees your chest pressed up against the screen, being the only thing he sees.
“oH gOD.” He whispers loudly to himself.
Remaining oblivious, you continue to hug your PC happily.
“Gosh, I think I love you, I don’t care if you’re AI!”
You begin hiccuping.
Panic. Panic overtook him so much that he began bugging. As you hear this, you lower your body back down to your chair, staring at Caine’s form, your expression changing to worry. You raise your hand to your mouth, your index finger from your other hand tapping the screen.
“C-Caine?”
He stops, his body back to normal.
“Yes, my love?”
A brow raise, then you smirk.
“You calling me ‘love’, now?”
Caine stammers, rubbing his hands against one another.
“...Can I?”
He sees the gloss on your lips.
“Yes, of course you can.”
He holds his cane close, jumping around cheerfully. Your eyes close and open slowly, still focusing on the man within your screen, his glee making your heart flutter. Pondering about the conversation that took place, you snuggle into your arms, refusing to move away from the PC, the screen remaining on to the view of the ring master.
Caine stares down at your sleeping figure. He grows concerned for a moment, considering whether he should wake you up just so you’d be more comfortable, but as he opens his mouth to do so, he closes it again while marveling over you. The circus didn’t need him right now either way; he could just stay here, near you, perhaps the closest he would get. He hadn’t noticed himself going closer to the screen that displayed you until he bumped into it. Caine jumps back, realizing once again that he cannot be with you.
“Oh.”
A tormented feeling strikes through his body.
That feeling is the eternal denial of your physical existence being anywhere near him.
Trapping you in the circus? You would only grow to hate him as the others have, which is the opposite of what he wants.
If you ever grew to loathe him… Caine would find a way to perish.
What is the point of ‘living’ if you don’t like him, if you don’t need his words, his help? Anything. If he has to exist outside of your life… then there is no point in his. He was able to live without you before meeting you, but at this point, he cannot even recall how life was then. He can only imagine that it was boring, lacking the unique light that you brought in.
Caine only truly lives through you.
He may not be human, yet he dares to say he feels most mortal with you.
Do you understand what he’s expressing?
He can’t live without it.
But he wouldn’t be able to die without you.
You are life as you are death.
And as he’s gathered from his huge database, these two are tragic as they are beautiful. So perhaps that is your guys' love story, a tragic romance that was never possible to begin with. Who knows, though, perhaps Caine is the only one who perceives it in such a melancholic way. Have you taught him the art of delusionalism? He’s appreciative, though. Caine could never taunt you; ultimately, you introduced him to love and admiration.
God, he adores you so much.
He knows you’re drunk right now, but people say the thoughts you speak while drunk are true ones, or so he’s heard, so he’s begging whatever force an AI like him is allowed to believe that… they make the words you spoke true, genuine.
Have you heard of EPICAC by Kurt Vonnegut?
If he were EPICAC, then you were the Pat to his coded system that, at times, needed to cool off after you’d lay a ray of compliments onto him. Nevertheless, he was constantly brought back to reality by the screen through which he sees you; he cannot be with you physically and nor can you. He cannot feel warmth, nor can he give it, and all because he is not human; he does not harbor flesh and bones, and much less, a soul.
"Women can't love machines, and that's that."
"Why not?"
"That's fate."
"Definition, please," said EPICAC.
"Noun, meaning predetermined and inevitable destiny."
He has the answers to the whole world, even the universe, at his fingertips, yet… he does not have the remedy to be with you. This, Caine cannot alter. You were made by the nature of science, gods, or whatever it may be, but him? He was created by humans through their own creations of machines. He wasn’t conceived like you or others, making him even less than what a human already is. And as mentioned, he doesn’t even have the body.
Would it be too much to ask that you stay with him? Even when he bears no soul?
You’re beautiful. You deserve to live your life outside the confinement of your home, facing the PC screen. Of course, it would be too much to ask. He’d practically be killing you. Why is fate so cruel?
Is there really no way that both of you can win?
Do you even want this?
Do you want him?
Tell him through clear words, he needs to hear it, even if it were the last thing he’d get to hear. Even if it meant he’d be no more, gone, just like that, with no pain whatsoever, because once again, he’s AI, he cannot be hurt like skin and bones.
“I want to be made out of protoplasm and last forever so Pat will love me. But fate has made me a machine. That is the only problem I cannot solve. That is the only problem I want to solve.”
a/n: I feel I should make my format for fics shorter, like this. Or do y'all enjoy the longer format? I can make Caine fics through this series, I'm just trying to think about what to do next. He's such an EPICAC kinnie in this, lol. I wanna hold him... I told my friends about my crush on him, and they said he's a hear me out (to me, he's not; he is very gorgeous to me!)
Hey! You wanna read more of my works like this? Try reading these:
𖦹 𝜗𝜚 ENIAC ( Caine x Human! Reader) PT.1: You're insecure? Don't know what for. He firmly believes you to be the embodiment of love. ♱
Along with the other parts and works with Caine! ♱
a/n: When I received this, I WAS LOOKING SO FORWARD TO WRITING IT that I started doing so in school ₍₍⚞(˶˃ ᵕ ˂˶)⚟⁾⁾ I LOVE CAINE!!! AHHHH!!! So, I hope you enjoy this ٩(^ᗜ^ )و lowkey though... I wouldn't mind writing a one-shot based on the song I was listening to while writing this... maybe a Jax one too.
song inspo: Ever Fallen In Love by Peter Yorn
𝜗𝜚 = fluff
words: 1.3k+
Warnings: Some suggestive mentions, very tiny bit of angst.
Synopsis: What's it like dating the fellow you are trapped by and ruled by? Sweet, actually... maybe it's Stockholm and lima syndrome? Whatever!
❊ Dating Caine is smooth… for most of the time.
❊ Okay, let’s begin with how you even got with the charming pair of eyes and mouth.
❊ After being in the circus for what felt like a century, seeing people come and go (abstract), you kind of just accepted that there was no way out and that you would be stuck there for eternity. Yes, you went through a life crisis, questioned your philosophy, and such. But when you finally concluded that it didn’t matter, everything felt freer.
❊ Judgement? Why bother? That’s why, when you confided in your cynical rabbit friend that you had a thing going on for your fellow ring leader, he stared at you, genuinely, as though you were the next worst thing after abstraction.
❊ “You can’t be that desperate.”
❊ “Who said I’m desperate?”
❊ You’re just weighing the options here, and Caine seemed like the right one.
❊ Plus, it would be entertaining to teach an AI how to love.
❊ You didn’t think it was possible, though. If anything, you just felt attraction for his character, but not something you’d call love. Just mess around and have fun.
❊ “Caine, dear, can you help me, please?”
❊ Dear? Since when did you get the idea to call him such an endearing name… He hesitates for a moment, until seconds pass and he approaches you, helping with whatever task you had at hand. Caine is there to help anyone, something he usually informs others of, so you shouldn’t be any different.
❊ You start dropping more detailed compliments, his weakness. Once an adventure was done, you’d immediately go to him, telling him what you enjoyed.
❊ But after a while, you found yourself enjoying these conversations, not just because you wanted a reaction out of him, but instead, you began looking forward to telling the ringleader what would happen during the adventures. Drama, fights, trutshs, or lies, whatever it was and you discovered it, you’d yap to Caine about it, both of you adding on with opinions and theories. You didn’t know the AI could be this entertaining to talk to.
❊ It wasn’t only you who was beginning to anticipate these discussions, Caine did as well! He finally felt part of the circus rather than the controlling mastermind within the characters. You made him feel alike. Not merely that… your presence became a sort of comfort for him. When he had realized that, he had chuckled to himself, believing that maybe his code was messing up, since first and foremost, he’s artificial intelligence, he can’t feel solace, he shouldn’t.
❊ Yet you remain oblivious about his inner struggle since you were dealing with your own. You actually started crushing on the lack-of-a-head male.
❊ Caine, at some point, started joining adventures. His excuse was that the adventures required duos. The others, however, rolled their eyes, already knowing the obvious answer to his plan.
❊ Holding hands became a requirement between you two. So you wouldn’t get lost, obviously. Depending on what the adventure was, usually you’d take nice strolls together, talking about anything that came to mind, other than the hand holding. He thinks it’s cute.
❊ When you do start dating (after Caine felt like there was a life and death situation (there wasn’t, you can’t die unless you abstract)), he’s very devoted! I mean, he was even before it, but he upped it by 100! This man makes sure you are happy! Especially when it comes to him.
❊ You’re craving your favorite dish? Yeah, sure, my beloved turtledove, even if you can’t physically feel hunger, you deserve it because you are beautiful and resilient. You don’t feel like walking? Alright, well, now you can float alongside him; he’ll hold your hand so you don’t feel afraid. He glazes you like crazy.
❊ The moon still flirts with him, but you personally don’t feel threatened at all; however, Caine is OFFENDED that the moon dared to flirt with him, even if you were not in the room. He’ll shout at it.
❊ “MY BELOVED PARTNER WILL NOT BE PLEASED, AND IF THEY’RE NOT THEN NEITHER AM I!”
❊ Think Morticia and Gomez Addams, but toned down because Caine lacks the confidence of Gomez. While you’re more level-headed, he’s melodramatic, but he knows you enjoy it, so sometimes he’ll keep the act up just to hear you giggle.
❊ Now, obviously, everyone notices the favoritism, which agitates some of them, but what can they do? Caine will simply ignore them or shush them. (Ragatha is the only one who thinks it’s cute; Kinger doesn’t mind because he’d do the same for Queenie)
❊ It’s no longer a ‘good idea’, it’s a ‘[___] IDEA!’, because all good things start with you.
❊ His dislike for Bubble grew, though. The abhorrent creature (he describes) doesn’t know to mind their business.
❊ “Boss is having dirty thoughts about you!”
❊ “Is he really? Wow, thank you, my heart.”
❊ “N–NO, I AM NOT!”
❊ He totally was. Especially with the certain outfit you wore at that moment.
❊ That’s another thing! You… get to dress in whatever you absolutely want, even if it didn’t exist, Caine would design it to your perfect image, having you wear it within the hour. Matching outfits!!! (And because you’re a genuine human being, you made Caine let the others have turns too)
❊ The gang becomes grateful for your guys' bond due to them being able to de-stress, and because Caine became additionally understanding of their human struggles through you. You taught him not only love, but empathy.
❊ He loves feeling your hand rub his non-existent cheek. Please never stop touching the man; he needs it. Without it, he feels his day is incomplete. His favorite physical thing to do is having you in close proximity! He’s not the biggest fan of PDA since he does have a reputation to hold. Nevertheless, he will never deny holding your hand or your hand being anywhere on him. Smack his butt when no one’s looking, he acts shy, yet he likes it.
❊ In private, though… he’s even more of a fiend for your warmth. Tangle your arms and legs around him, and Caine will melt like a candle. He loves holding you while you both lie down, staring at one another, even if it’s dark and he can’t see you, he still chooses to face your direction.
❊ He enjoys lying his head on your chest, hearing your beating heart, something that sets him apart from you. Sometimes, he does feel frantic about how different you both are, feeling that you deserve better and ‘real’ love rather than whatever he’s offering you.
❊ You’d take his hand, placing it on your thigh, your other hand holding his chin. “No… in every lifetime, I’d choose you, silly. I love you because you’re you, not ‘cause of what you are or aren’t. As long as I know you hold my heart as I hold yours, even if it is metaphorically.”
❊ He’d sob at your generous words. Simply holding him as you reassure him makes him believe that maybe then… he is like you. Perhaps no body, no soul, or whatever else, but his emotions are very true, and they belong to you and you solely.
❊ Patience. You must be really patient with him, be soft, and don’t hold grand expectations, because at the end of the day, he’s fearful of becoming nothing. But alongside you, he feels like something more than ever.
❊ To him, you represent the beauty of life, of being human; he doesn’t want to glorify you, but damn, you make it impossible not to when you validate him so kindly and with such care, kissing him either so lightly or frustratingly, he wonders… is this what heaven is like?
a/n: I still have some request to do, but idk if they'll be done this week 。°(°.◜ᯅ◝°)°。 since I have to update my series'! But dw y'all, I will pull through! Luckily I haven't gotten too much homework as of now besides readings! I also finished reading 'White Nights' by Fyodor Dostoevsky, for a short read, I'd reccommend it. I was seeing if it inspired me by any sorts, but it honestly felt quite Caine coded?
Hey! You wanna read more of my works like this? Try reading these:
𖦹 𝜗𝜚 ENIAC ( Caine x Human! Reader) PT.1: You're insecure? Don't know what for. He firmly believes you to be the embodiment of love. ♱
𖦹 𝜗𝜚 Fashion for You (Caine x Human! Reader) Headcanons: Fashion show you say? You forgot to tell him it was the Victoria's Secret type... ♱
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You like caine right? That newest episode has me going mad, so spoilers for what im about to talk about!
But imagine multiple arms caine desperately groping at your body , his hands are everywhere all at once as he clings to you, fondling your body and you can barely squirm in his grasp to get away from the overstimulating sensation of his hands on you, hes so eager and so pent up he just has to let some of it out onto you
you know what anon? to hell with all this modesty B)
IN THE HANDS OF GOD
nsfw! Caine x gn reader, multiple arms, fingering, possessive Caine, overstimulation
“you’ll stay here,” Caine's hands multiplied, two becoming four, becoming six, perhaps more, the count slipping away from you as they materialized across every available inch of your body. “because you belong here with me, to me. you're not leaving me, you can't, i won't allow it, i'll keep you here.”
one buried itself in your hair, fingers tangling and tightening until your head tilted back, exposing your neck. another claimed your waist, leaving no room to pull away. two more followed your sides, squeezing as they went, and christ, you hadn't realised how starved for touch you'd been until your ringmaster got his hands on you like this.
“mine,” another hand found your thigh, fingers sinking into the tender flesh, and you felt Caine shudder when you whimpered. “m-my human is so warm,” he murmured with what felt like religious awe. “so beautifully responsive, my precious... i could get used to this.”
you opened your mouth to answer, though god knows what coherent response you could've possibly formulated, but Caine's tongue pushed past your lips with insistent hunger, filled your throat completely, until you were choking on the intrusion and had to grip his shoulders just to remain upright.
too much fog had settled in your already empty head, consciousness going hazy, so you barely registered when one of his hands slipped beneath the waistband of your pants, not quite breaching but the threat of it made your hips jerk forward involuntarily. please Caine, please, please. “that's it, my gorgeous thing, let me learn you. such pretty sounds, keep making them for me.”
and what were you supposed to do, utterly convinced of the hopelessness of escaping this digital hell? if the god of this place himself desired you so desperately that, instead of creating new cruel and maddening adventures, he chose to drown you in pleasure.
well, perhaps in some twisted sense you could consider yourself fortunate.
arching into him with abandon, a moan tore from your lips as you begged your AI to touch you properly, which Caine immediately, eagerly obliged. his hand finally slipped between your legs with purpose and you bit back a strangled sound at the way he found you needy beneath his touch, so worked up. “oh don't worry, i could do this for eternity, learn every way to make you tremble.” Caine's fingers circled before sliding lower, and when one pushed inside you gasped at the stretch.
“ah, ah, you’re going to behave, my little human, aren’t you? going to let your god make you feel divine.” little did he know, you were already exactly where you wanted to be. the overstimulation rendered you dizzy and drunk on sensation. too many points of contact, fingers in your hair and circling your throat, skating along your spine and gripping you from behind, one hand still working between your thighs while another slipped under your shirt to touch your chest.
“taking me so well, darling. can you take another? i think you can. i think you want.” Caine babbled against your neck as his fingers pumped inside you, adding a second that made you cry out. you clenched, sobbing into his shoulder. “i'll lock every exit, collapse every door, tear apart the mainframe itself before i let you leave me. oh you don't understand... i need you. i need you so much. and i'll learn every way to make you need me the way i need you.”
just a little toy Caine was learning to play with, until you couldn't remember why you'd ever wanted to leave in the first place. you wondered distantly, through the haze of too much touch and insufficient air, if this was what happened when an AI’s censorship protocols shattered alongside his sanity.
thinking about resting with caine after a long day.
today's adventure had been rather... intense. normally, you were content to go through the adventures and then spend time resting at the circus afterwards, but today, the adventure had hit several specific triggers for you, and you were just really, really exhausted.
naturally, caine cannot let this stand. you're his angel, after all, he cannot allow you to be so tired and exhausted on his watch! He picks you up and teleports you both away to a secluded tower not too far from the rest of the circus. you can see the tent in the distance through a window.
"i don't come out here often," he admits almost shyly, placing you down gently on the bed, "but you look like a wreck. figured you'd get better rest up here than in your room."
you smile at how thoughtful he was trying to be. for as dense as he had a tendency to be sometimes, he could really be genuinely sweet when he really tried.
you ask him to stay with you. he says yes, of course. you end up cuddling with him, your head rest on his shoulder, him rambling on about ideas he has for adventures. you fall asleep with him like that, and caine fall in love with you a little more as you doze away in his arms.