Self-Destructive Tendencies

Self fulfilling prophecy when someone tells you "no one will love you as much as me" and then proceed to fuck you up in ways no human person would ever tolerate

Starting to think maybe my life feeling unmanageable and my insurance company discontinuing coverage for my adhd meds happening withing months of each other wasnt a coincidence

Someday I'm either gonna kill myself or publish a book and I'm kinda excited to find out which one.

I want to kill myself which isn't unusual but damn I feel like shit

Ive literally been barely scraping by and trying not to kill myself for as long as I can remember and I'm tired af.

Just got 2 teeth pulled, had to wait outside in 80 degree heat for an hour after to go home and then when i got there i got yelled at by my husband for "not acting like an adult" about it.

Yesterday was the first time in a long time hanging out with a new friend. In 13 years this is the 3rd time introducing him to a friend. It is the 3rd time a friend has expressed concern over the way he speaks to me. The 3rd time someone told me i deserved kindness. The millionth time someones asked "is he just like this?". I was embarrassed to be associated with him. How many more embarrassments can i endure?

Literally nobody gives a shit about me the way other people do about their friends/family/partners.