ᡣ𐭩 summer skin on the emerald grass ౨ৎ˚

drop dead

i know that the bar closes at 11, but i hope you never finish that beer

you know all the words to "just like heaven", and I know why he wrote them now that you're standing right here.

one night I was bored in bed and stalked you on the internet.

i'm the most alive i've ever been, but kiss me and I might drop dead.

i feel like i might throw up.

you're so, so pretty boy, i'm paranoid i made you up.

i've been droppin' hints all night, that i'd love if you held my hand, goddamn.

let's go steady, let's go out.

stupid song

new york city's never looked so blue.

my friends are smoking blunts in the bathroom.

they say that honest love is a cage that makes you feel free.

all the girls at this party are so cool.

but i can't help but imagine what you say when you speak about me.

you're a spark in the dark, in my clothes, i caught aflame.

you should feel how i feel when somebody says your name.

i'm the car speeding down the boulevard without a brake, and i want you more than any stupid song could ever say.

i want you more than any stupid song could ever say.

my heart made of wax and i'm melting in the sun.

i'm the thread on your shirt and it's coming undone.

i feel right, i feel wrong, i feel totally insane.

honeybee

so i guess that it's true, time can heal even the worst of wounds.

the clichés i knew seem so commonplace when i saw you.

let's just walk in the dark, hop the fence in the park, baby boy, honeybee, god, i love the way you look at me.

and it's too hard to describe this in a way that feels honest, but even when i'm quiet, i love you, baby, i promise.

and i hope i never see what your face looks like going, a face i swear that i could spend my whole life knowing, here's to hoping.

pick me up, walk me home, man, it feels like god threw me a bone.

sticky sweet, tangerine, would you sit and keep me company?

in the dark, i'm not scared, i just reach and you're right there.

shooting stars, racing cars, everything i own just feels like ours.

maggots for brains

my day is so mundane, i don't think i left the house.

drank a pot of coffee, tried to write, nothing came out.

somehow, it's the weekend, i'm still bored out of my skull, and i went to the party but only on principle.

empty, who can leave?

i'm a zombie in my body, i'm a train off of the track.

i feel dirty, i feel rotten, and the colors are all flat.

i'm a sad shell of a woman, and i've got maggots for brains, but that's just a thing that happens in my brain, he goes away.

everything feels moldy like the fruit that's in my fridge.

everything that's funny, i wish i could tell to him.

sometimes, at a low point, i even wish for tragedy, 'cause i know he'd come over and take real good care of me.

what can i do but think of you?

u+me=<3

i think that you're killer with your floppy hair.

take me out to dinner, you know you can take me anywhere.

all of my girlfriends roll their eyes and tell me to take it slow this time.

i got a feeling, wounds are healing, talking on the phone.

i know everybody changes but i hope that we don't.

carve our names into the car seat leather, you plus me equals a heart forever.

i like your big sister, she has your same face.

i try to win her over with my cynical humor and yacht rock music taste

all my ex-boyfriends have heard these lines, but i like you better by a million times.

if you buy me silver jewelry and all my favorite cadbury and tell me it again 'bout how we met and that you thought of me.

sometimes i get overwhelmed and way too far, i hurt myself, i often get the feeling that i'll never want somebody else.

they say modern love's a cruel endeavor and to that i say, "fuck it, whatever".

my way

it's a little hard to to stomach all your amateur moves

you're loose with me, like obviously, but you lingering on the edge just like a bad perfume.

it's getting to me, embarrassingly.

here's the part where the girl gets pissed, and the girl is me, did you get that hint?

you're in my way now.

don't go where you don't belong.

think i can make out how hard you hang on.

kind of insane how you keep calling, but you never get the message.

it goes my way now.

man, i wonder what you think.

you're sending another poem and think that'll let me go.

maybe you're just tryna to get me riled up now, you're posting another pic, enclosing a note of his.

well, here's a map of the lines i drew, and some girl steps over and the girl is you.

so, where'd you get that confidence from?

last time that i checked, i won.

let me be direct, "just stop", you're being fucking weird.

maybe I'm a petty bitch, but you made me resort to this, that's it, i win.

purple

it's funny when your mom shows pictures of you in your school clothes, your buzzcut, and scrapes on your knees change, but those eyes, still no.

it's crazy how i used to visit your town like a touris now i got a local grocery store and a favorite florist.

you kiss my neck, may our paths intersect 'til the two lines formed a circle.

i melt with you, you're red and I'm blue, now i see the world in purple.

now a toothbrush, a coat, and pair of shoes all come in double.

we fight over who i'm hanging out with like a real couple.

it's a small world, on and on again, revolve around us two.

it's crazy, i had big dreams 'til i tied myself to you, now I'm all-consumed in.

melt with you 'til it all turns black. are we so in love? are we too attached?

melt with you 'til it all turns black, when you smooth it out, but it feels too flat.

melt with you 'til it all turns black. when you get so close and you can't go back.

melt with you 'til it all turns black, melt with you 'til it just feels sad.

the cure

all the pretty girls in the foreground of my mind.

i thought i'd done enough, but they keep moving the line.

i thought I found the antidote this time.

all the nights i spend fighting bad thoughts in my room, feeling so alone, might as well be on the moon.

my head is full of poison and my heart is full of doubt.

i got toxins in my bloodstream; you tried hard to suck them out.

it feels like medication and it's good for me, i'm sure, but it don't matter how your love feels anymore, it'll never be the cure.

it'll never be the cure.

used to play a game in my head when I'd date a guy, tally up the girls that he fucked till i start to cry.

why can't you come stitch me up?

why can't it ever be enough?

it's not enough.

begged

all that i want is to know undoubtedly that you just have eyes for me.

could you make it clear?

all that i want is to sit here silently and watch movies on tv.

what a shame, you're not here to witness my devotion, and my endless well of needs.

i'm an anchor in the ocean, you know i could never leave.

so, i'm patient, you're learning, pretend it's not hurting.

they say it's a virtue to not let good love slip away.

so, i'm cool and forgiving, i'll take what you're giving, but nothing's quite enough, when i know that to get it, i begged.

and i have this thought when i lay in bed at night that i feel trapped inside my life.

is that a normal thing to fight back the waves of a static lover's dread?

i'm overwhelmed, i'm underfed, and yet I still cling to hope like snow on mountains.

careless words melt it away.

i'm a penny in a fountain, just waiting on my luck to change.

what's wrong with me

i'm just staring at the ceiling, can't describe this feeling ii've got in my head.

i'm out of body in my bed and i'm just searching up my symptoms, desperate to fix 'em.

i'll do anything, 'cause lately i've been spiraling.

i'm not feeling like myself and nothing ever seems to help.

went to the doctor and she said i was fine, but every movie that i see makes me cry.

it's like somebody put a weight on my chest.

i should talk to a friend but i can't get out of bed.

my head is spinning and my stomach is sick, say i'm in love, so it's hard to admit.

i can't eat, i can't sleep, i think you're what's wrong with me.

i keep looking for distractions, hope the feeling passes.

i've got to say, it's getting harder every day.

i can't seem to get around it, head just keeps on pounding with the simple thought "what if this isn't what i want?".

i'm not feeling like myself, all amber lights and warning bells.

i'm not feeling like myself and i'm not hiding it well.

less

i feel it again, edge of the bed.

body and head protesting, my stomach's in knots.

i don't wanna talk, let's just go to bed or something.

maybe it'll fix itself tomorrow, but i've been saying that like every night.

you say you can't stand to watch me cry a minute more, so you do the noble thing and open up the door.

if loving me means letting go and wishing me the best then i guess i wish you loved me less.

i wish you loved me less.

we tried to recreate our favorite date, ut we didn't laugh much this time.

our trip to Big Sur only confirmed this isn't what it should feel like.

maybe i'm a stubborn overthinker but i've been thinking over this a lot.

i could try convincing you they're just intrusive thoughts, but you've seen me truly happy, so you know right now i'm not.

if loving me means crying on the curb at lax, well, then i guess i wish you loved me less.

if loving me means saying "babe, i think this is the end", i guess i wish you loved me less.

expectations

i met him at a party, i think he was on drugs.

he wasn't smart or funny, i convinced myself he was.

he had a great apartment, and a car his parents bought, i thought that he was perfect, and now his number's blocked.

took a couple months but now i am secure, i am so evolved, now i ask for more, and more, and more, and more, and more.

i won't settle for a guy with a fake job.

he seems so desperate for loving, but, baby, i'm not.

gave my heart with zero stipulations, now, i take careful consideration.

i'm not kissin' any boy that is passive.

your indecision is painfully unattractive.

past mistakes are just new information.

these days, i've got expectations.

so i hit the new year like a single girl at a vegas bar.

rocking my mini dress with a vodka cran and an open heart.

yeah, i've got hope, yeah, i've got drive, i will not lose my faith.

don't think my future husband is in this bar in Silver Lake

but in a couple months, a man will be the cure, he will be evolved, and i will be adored.

cigarette smoke

it's a cigarette smoke, it's a smell that i know, it clings to my clothes, seeps into my bones.

it's a real quiet house with the shower left on.

five beers in the fridge and the second car's gone.

i regret you, how long i stayed.

i resent you for not being brave.

tell me something honest so the memories turn dark.

you said that i made loving look easy 'til i made it hard.

give me back my time and i will give you back your heart.

i thought that we played the perfect couple 'til you didn't want the part.

some nights can be so fucking lonely, but it's better than begging for you to stand up for me, honeybee.

i regret you, what i let slide.

i resent you taking her side.

it's bone dry, bitter, and hollow, you'll be miles away tomorrow.

roleplay starters inspired by slow burn love — lingering glances, almost-touches, and feelings that simmer for months before finally spilling over

LONGING IN THE LITTLE MOMENTS

soft looks, subtle shifts, that ache of wanting more but not daring to reach

“Why do you always look away right when I catch your eyes?”

“You keep brushing my hand. Accidentally… right?”

“You don’t have to leave yet. Stay—just a few more minutes.”

“Why does being around you feel… different?”

“I notice the way you soften around me. Even when you try not to.”

ACCIDENTAL INTIMACY

hands brushing, falling asleep near each other, warmth passed back and forth

“You’re freezing—come here. It’s just body heat… nothing else.”

“You can lean on me if you’re tired. I wouldn't mind.”

“Hold still, you’ve got something in your hair—just let me…”

“Didn’t mean to fall asleep on you, but… I didn’t want to move.”

“I like it when you stand close. Even if you pretend you don’t notice.”

DENIAL THAT’S OBVIOUS TO EVERYONE ELSE

everyone sees it except the two falling in love

“Why does everyone keep asking if we’re together? We’re not… right?”

“No, I wasn’t staring. I was… observing. For reasons.”

“We’re just friends. Totally normal friends who… talk every night?”

“Why does it bother you when I flirt with other people?”

“We’re close. But not that close. Unless… you want to be?”

RISING TENSION, UNKEPT DISTANCE

the space between you shrinking, breath catching, lips almost touching

“You keep stepping closer. Are you doing that on purpose?”

“Tell me to back up. If you don’t, I won’t.”

“You can’t look at me like that and expect me to think straight.”

“If you touch me again, I’m not sure I’ll be able to stop myself.”

“We’re either about to kiss or make the world’s worst decision.”

LATE NIGHTS THAT LEAD TO CONFESSIONS

quiet rooms, tired voices, guards slipping

“I shouldn’t say this, but… I feel safer with you than anyone else.”

“You’re the first person I think about in the morning. And the last at night.”

“I don’t know when it happened, but you’ve become… important.”

“Why do I only tell you the things I’m scared to say out loud?”

“Stay up with me. I don’t want this feeling to fade yet.”

FEAR OF RUINING EVERYTHING

the hesitation, the trembling, the hope

“If I told you the truth… would it ruin us?”

“I’m scared of losing what we already have.”

“I care about you too much to risk it unless you feel the same.”

“Don’t lie—there’s something between us. You feel it too.”

“Tell me you don’t want me, and I’ll pretend none of this happened.”

FINALLY CROSSING THE LINE

the moment where holding back isn’t possible anymore

“Come here. I can’t pretend I don’t want you anymore.”

“I’ve been waiting for you to make the first move.”

“If we’re doing this… don’t pull away.”

“I’ve wanted to kiss you for months.”

“Tell me this isn’t just one moment. Tell me we’re choosing each other.”

    ❝    you'll get it    ❞    ricky proffers, getting up off the couch to join her by the piano.    ❝    sometimes you just need to take a second. i don't like to force this shit, you know? sucks the life out    ❞    it just makes it harder to be real.

hands   drop   from   the   piano.   maybe   he's   got   a   point.   she   should   get   up,   step   away   for   a   little   bit.   ❝   okay,   a   break   it   is.   ❞   she   says,   taking   a   breath.   she's   only   got   the   music   room   reserved   for   another   hour   and   she'd   wanted   to   get   through   this   part   that   was   giving   her   trouble,   but   it   just   wasn't   happening.   sighing,   she   stands   up   and   takes   a   step   away,   putting   a   little   distance   between   herself   and   the   piano,   both   figuratively   and   literally.   ❝   what   do   you   think?   any   insight   to   what   could   fix   it?   ❞

old fashioned

    ❝    next thing i know you'll tell me you never really do this-    ❞    a wry smile on valerie's face as she sips her champagne, looking up at him.    ❝    and you only drink old fashioneds    ❞    

❝   i   definitely   won't   be   ordering   an   old   fashioned.   ❞   he   says   with   a   shake   of   his   head.   ❝   but,   no,   i   don't   really   do   this.   i   was   in   a   relationship   for   almost   three   years.   ❞   he   shrugs,   picking   up   his   own   drink   and   taking   a   sip.   he   liked   monogamy;   he   liked   pouring   all   his   energy   and   care   into   one   person.   going   out   with   valerie   was   exciting,   but   it   was   also   nervewracking.   he   was   into   her,   but   nervous   she   isn't   looking   for   something   serious.

    ❝    i don't know maddox. is she flirting with you? or do you really just have the most epic taste in shoes ever    ❞    he's sure his point is made well enough in the way he says it, repeating what he'd overheard earlier today.    ❝    if you really like ashlyn, then you should focus on that. you said exactly what you just said. you and madison are over. that's that. it's over. you can see what happens with ashlyn now that you're single.    ❞    

❝   are   you   implying   that   she's   lying   about   my   epic   taste   in   shoes?   ❞   maddox   asks,   lifting   an   eyebrow   in   challenge.   she's   not   used   to   this   anymore;   dating   and   trying   to   figure   out   if   someone   really   is   flirting   with   her.   ❝   madison   and   i   don't   feel   over.   ❞   she   can't   tell   if   it's   because   she'd   been   brushed   off   and   their   relationship   had   come   to   an   end   so   abruptly,   but   she   was   still...   confused.   yearning?   she   couldn't   put   her   finger   on   the   feeling.   but,   she   knew   she   was   into   ashlyn...

their hotel suite is absolutely perfect, and they have it the next couple of days to enjoy the city.    ❝    isn't it pretty?    ❞    she's never been afraid of a little weather. and the city looks beautiful in white. at the question she's quick to shake her head.    ❝    god, no. we laid a new version of the song down in the studio the other day for the parade. the floats don't have the capacity to support that kind of live audio, so even if it wasn't freezing it's just hanging out and pretending.    ❞    just being up there in the cold would be enough without having to really sing in the snowy weather.    ❝    have you seen my dress yet? it's really a good thing there's a coat for when we're not in the filming area because... i'm definitely going to freeze    ❞    she shivers just thinking about it, even despite not being a california girl like sierra.

❝   it's   stunning.   ❞   she   agrees,   pulling   her   cardigan   tighter   around   her   body   as   she   looks   out   the   window.   she   loved   the   city   in   the   winter,   even   if   she   was   a   california   girl   through   and   through—always   chasing   sunshine.   it   was   nice   to   be   able   to   enjoy   the   snow   for   a   week   or   two   before   she   got   tired   of   it   and   needed   to   get   back   to   a   beach.   ❝   i   could   not   imagine   being   up   there,   in   the   snow,   freezing   cold,   and   having   to   perform.   i   mean,   i   already   don't   have   any   interest   in   being   a   performer,   but   that   would   probably   do   me   in   if   i   did   try   to   do   something   like   that.   ❞   eyes   light   up   at   the   mention   of   her   dress;   now   that's   what   sisi   is   most   interested   in.   ❝   no,   oh   my   gosh!   i   need   to   see   the   dress.   ❞   sierra   had   a   brief   few   months   where   she'd   considered   being   a   personal   stylist,   but   the   allure   of   managing   talent   was   too   enticing   to   her.

song: moonlight

    ❝    i never knew you could hold moonlight in your hands-    ❞    

❝   you   could   do   anything   you   want,   bambi.   ❞   he   says,   smiling   at   her   as   he   wraps   an   arm   around   her   shoulders.   he   was   sure   that   she   could   hold   moonlight   if   she   wanted   to;   after   all,   he   was   convinced   she'd   hung   the   moon.