someone take my phone away pls

"Bucky?" you asked quietly. He grunted in response and you bit your lip, gently taking his hand in yours, trying to ignore the way he tensed slightly, as if preparing himself for your words. You frowned, moving your joined hands so that you could swing your leg over his, settling into his lap, one hand still in his, the other up on his shoulder, his flinch more pronounced this time.

"Bucky," you said more firmly, waiting until he looked into your eyes. "You need to understand something, and I'm afraid you won't without something drastic." Bucky's eyes turned sad, and you hurried on. "Which is why we're doing this, here and now."

You leaned forwards, pressing your lips to his, and though he was visibly confused, Bucky kissed you back, untangling your hand from his so that he could grab your hip. You tangled your free hand in his hair, your other one smoothing over his shoulder, down his side, tracing the spot where his arm should be.

Bucky released your hand, moving your other hand away from his side. "We're not doin' that doll," he muttered, eyes downcast. You shook your head stubbornly, and pushed his hands away from yours, reaching down to your jeans. You undid the button, yanking the zipper down before quickly scooting off Bucky's lap to stand in front of him. His eyes were wide as he stared at you. "Wh-what are you doing sweetheart?" he asked hesitantly.

You grabbed the hem of your shirt, lifting it over your head and dropping it to the side. "I'm getting undressed Bucky. Is that okay?"

He nodded dumbly, and you slid your pants along with your panties down your legs, until they pooled on the floor. You quickly took your bra off and dropped it, standing naked in front of Bucky, who just stared.

You walked forwards, kneeling between his legs, sliding your hands up his thighs. "Is it okay if I blow you Bucky?" you asked innocently, hands gently massaging his thick thighs.

Bucky gulped and whispered, "Please."

You smiled, hands moving his jeans as Bucky's hand tangled in your hair hesitantly, moving more confidently when you moaned loudly. He lightly tugged your hair and your head fell back, a guttural groan falling from your lips as your hands stilled where they were taking out his cock.

Bucky surged forwards, kissing you deeply, both of you gasping into the kiss. Your hands frantically tugged at his pants until his cock was out, and you broke the kiss, panting, urging Bucky to lift his hips. He did, somewhat awkwardly, pressed back into the couch for stability but you moved on, eagerly pressing a kiss to the tip of his dick.

Bucky groaned loudly, making your clench as you pressed more kisses along his dick, slowly opening your mouth as you did, getting it wet and tasting it, feeling it. You took him into your mouth, going as far as you could before pulling back, sucking at the tip. You looked up at Bucky, eyes wide.

"Oh Jesus doll, this is perfect, you're perfect, so good to me, I don't deserve you," he muttered, and your eyes narrowed in frustration. You released his dick, his hand falling from your head as he watched you stand. You straddled him again, sitting on his thighs.

"Bucky, you do deserve me, that's what I'm trying to tell you." You grabbed his hand, pressing it to your pussy. "You deserve whatever you want, you deserve to have me, all of me." You moved one hand to his armless shoulder and he shuddered. Bucky tried to pull back, but you held firm. "This? Is not going to stop me from loving you. This? Is not going to stop me from being yours, from being your girl."

Tears filled Bucky's eyes and he sobbed, burying his face in your neck as you released his hand, letting him wrap his arm around your waist, pulling you into him. You wrapped your own arms around his neck, one hand in his hair, stroking gently, letting him cry.

He pulled back, lips crashing into yours, desperate and passionate. His hand moved from your back, around to your pussy, fingers slipping inside easily. You gasped into the kiss, feeling him start stretching you out.

"You're my girl? Promise baby? Promise me this means nothing, promise me it doesn't change a goddamn thing," Bucky growled, fingers stroking your walls before pulling out, guiding his dick to your entrance.

You answered, "Yes Bucky, I promise!" as he pressed in, you lowering yourself down onto his dick, inch by inch, moaning as he filled you for the first time. You felt a twinge of pressure and then there was pleasure, your body going tense as you gasped in shock.

Bucky wrapped his arm around your back again, pulling you in close, tucking his face back into your neck as he panted, straining to not thrust into you. You held his head to you, fingers tangling in the hairs at the bottom of his neck. You slowly lifted your hips, testing the movement, and Bucky clutched at your hip desperately.

"It's okay Bucky, I'm okay, we're okay," you whispered, dropping back down and moaning, whimpering when Bucky's hand tightened even further.

"Promise me you love me?" he whispered unevenly, keeping you close.

You bit your lip, tears in your own eyes. "I promise I love you Bucky, and I always will." His shoulders relaxed beneath your hands, and this time there was no fear in him when you ran your hand over the place where his arm should have been. The tears in your eyes spilled over and you kissed Bucky deeply, clenching down on him as you came, overwhelmed with feelings. Bucky's dick twitched inside you as you tightened around it, and he came too, deep and for a long time.

You settled around the dining table, your boyfriend on one side, and his brother Bucky on the other. You always liked Bucky, he was charming, funny and you got on like a house on fire.

In fact you had been getting along so well that you might have started thinking about him a little too much. You really loved your boyfriend, but this thing with Bucky, the chemistry was kind of undeniable.

Drinks were flowing and you laughed along at jokes as you celebrated your wins and commiserated your losses. More often than not, Bucky had you in stitches, you leaned on his shoulder, pressed your hand on his thigh and occasionally wrapped your arms around his neck. It was just friendly banter, you loved Bucky, he was so much fun to be around and made nights like this even more enjoyable.

"Bucky, seriously your gonna make me pee" you yelled when he told a particularly hilarious joke. You jumped up and ran to the bathroom, giggling as you ran down the hall. You were in there for a little while when you heard a knock. "Occupied!" You called but it was a very persistent knock. Finally you finished up and swung open the door. "Oh! What are you doing here?" Your boyfriend swept you up in his arms and kissed you. You chuckled and tried to push him off. "Hey! We can't do it here! Everyone will know!"

You kissed him a little more but eventually he relented with a chuckle and let you go. When you returned to the table your face flushed as Bucky looked at you, his eyebrows quirking in amusement. "All good with you?" He asked and you nudged him in the ribs, "shuttup Barnes" and you sipped on your drink.

-----------------------🌚🌝--------------------

Much later you were hanging out with Bucky in the kitchen. You were both a little tipsy and very giggly. He was telling you some stories from his childhood and you fell forward, leaning your head on his broad chest as you laughed.

He wrapped his arm around you, and as you looked up at him he pressed a kiss to your forehead. "Oh" you said, looking up at him with wide eyes. His body was frozen but you didn't move from your position. Your hands were pressed on his pecs and you could feel his heart thumping in his chest. "I... Um.... So..." He stuttered and you could just blink at him.

You heard a bottle clang in the other room and a voice getting closer. You quickly separated and you went to refill your drink.

Your boyfriend came into the room, obviously missing the weird tension and wrapped his arms around you, kissing your neck. It felt.... Odd. "You ready for bed huh? Wanna spend some alone time with you..." He growled and you felt a little embarrassed, "Honey, shush Bucky's right there." His brother just chuckled and dragged you out of the room. You glanced back at Bucky and for the first time felt a pang of something sad in your heart.

-----------------------🌚🌝--------------------

It was about 2am. You had snuck back down to the kitchen for some water, but also to get out of your boyfriend's room. You suddenly felt suffocated by the way you were feeling and you just needed a moment to think without his sweet face causing you to ache with guilt.

But why did you feel guilty? Yeah you liked Bucky but you didn't like him, like him. Did you? It was just a forehead kiss, which was actually a mistake, just a turn of the head. Friends kiss each other sometimes don't they? You stared out of the kitchen window feeling utterly confused when none other than Bucky walked into the room behind you.

"Oh, sorry, I didn't mean to disturb you" he mumbled and went to leave. "No wait please" you whispered and walked over to him, taking his hand and pulling him over to the table to sit down. You sat in an awkward silence for a moment as he sipped at his water.

"So, you kissed me.... That wasn't anything right? Just a drunk, friend kiss type thing." His eyes widened and he nodded, "um yeah, that was just a mistake for sure.... Like you say... A friendly kiss, between friends." You both sat there in silence for a moment. You followed his eyes, which seemed to be looking between your lips, shoulder and eyes. Your bare knees brushed against his and you both sucked in a breath.

"Well ok, that sounds fine, great even. Let's just go back to normal then" you said, patting his knee and smiling at him. He nodded, then grabbed your wrist, then dragged you forward and pulled you into a kiss.

Not a friend kiss. Not an innocent mistake kiss. A full on proper kiss.

And you didn't stop him. You moaned as his tongue explored your mouth. Your hands gripped his cheeks as his thumbs pressed into your soft thighs. It was like no kiss you'd ever had. It was gentle but breathtaking, you felt everything he was feeling and you couldn't stop. You lost your mind as you climbed into his lap, thighs straddling his as you pulled at his hair and he groaned as you ground your hips a little against him. His hands slipped under your sleep shirt and caressed your stomach and breasts.

Finally you broke the kiss to whisper his name and that brought you back down to earth. "Oh god, we can't" you whispered, pressing your forehead against his. He huffed a sigh, hands squeezing at you. "But I really want to...Fuck, look at you, I just gotta" he whispered, hands grasping your face and pulling you back to him. You grasped his face too and whined as you kissed him. Suddenly you jumped up, "no, no, no, no, Bucky. Your brother is my boyfriend. Like my boyfriend, your brother?" He rolled his eyes and folded his arms across his chest. "Yeah I fucking know, drives me crazy that he got to you first." He stood and came to a stop in front of you. "Now I have to watch you with him..." His arms gripped yours and pulled you close "....when you should be with me."

"I....I don't know what to do Buck. This is... it's wrong. I mean it feels good, but we're not those people..." As you spoke he closed the gap, pressing his body against yours, trapping you against the kitch counter. "I don't care. At least not right now. You are the girl of my dreams and you're kissin me. Shit... I can't not do this now I'm here."

You could feel his body react to you, his cock stiffening against your hips. When you didn't stop him he leaned down, pressing kisses to your shoulder, up your neck, to your cheek and finally to your lips. You sighed and returned it, wrapping your arms around him and he lifted you to sit on the counter.

You watched as he hooked his fingers into your underwear and pulled it down. He groaned as he caught sight of your glistening folds, licking his finger before rubbing it gently over you, making you gasp and grind down on him.

You quickly pushed his boxers down, until his cock sprang free. You pulled him in to kiss you, his lips crashing into yours and your hands wrapped round his length, gently stroking him as he lined himself up with your entrance.

"Can't be too loud sweetie" he whispered as you felt the fat head press against you. "But I wanna hear some noises from that pretty mouth, please?" You nodded, which turned into a loud gasp as he sunk in, stretching your walls inch by inch. You gripped his shoulders and whispered a string of curses as you both watched him bottom out.

"Fuck, better than I imagined" he groaned and wasted no time dragging his hips back before slamming back into you again. Your whole body shook as he fucked you, your guilt being eaten away by his passion. The way his kissed you so perfectly. The way your body reacted to every touch so eagerly. How good he made you feel, everytime you were with him. You clung tighter, never wanting it to stop as he peppered kisses on to your neck. You whined quietly into his skin, "Bucky, please, god please make me come" you whimpered, the pressure in your tummy building as his thrusts became faster and harder. He pulled back and he moved his hand down to rub at your bundle of nerves. The effect almost instantaneous, as you fell back on the counter, hand over your mouth as you clenched and spasmed around him.

Quickly he pulled out and groaned and he came over your pussy, as if to mark it as his. He slipped his dick back inside you, helping you ride your own wave until you were panting and shuddering under his actions. He finally pulled out and helped you to sit up straight then off the counter to standing, although your legs felt like jelly.

He kissed you again, lingering as you brushed your fingers through his hair. "Goodnight Bucky" you whispered and grabbed your underwear before heading back to your boyfriend's room.

-----------------------🌚🌝--------------------

Next morning you joined everyone at breakfast, the jovial mood from the night before seemed to have remained which you were relieved of. Bucky hadn't appeared yet.

Your boyfriend kissed you when you sat down next to him and you smiled at him. Just as you tucked into your pancakes Bucky appeared, greeting everyone, including you as normal. Things were fine until your boyfriend said, "oh Buck, you live in Brooklyn now right? My girls got a conference in the city next week, do you think she could stay with you for a couple of nights?"

“I.. I don’t know what to do.” Your voice was muffled in his shirt, and yet he heard you clearly. He shushed you as you cried, not because you were afraid, but because you felt safest in his arms. You knew you could put down the mask you wore in front of the world and just be you in front of Bucky.

“I just feel so… so helpless. Things are happening that are out of my control and I hate it. I hate this feeling…” you sniffled as you looked up at Bucky. His blue eyes shone in understanding as he wiped away your tears with his thumbs and cupped your cheeks.

“I know it feels bad, but it’s going to get better.” He said softly. “No. No it’s not.” You shook your head, but he titled your face such that you looked directly into his eyes. “Do you trust me?” Without question. You nodded and a soft smile spread across his lips. “Then believe me when I say everything is going to turn out just fine.”

The conviction with which he says leaves you no option but to believe him. His eyes were so kind, and just looking at his face soothed your aching heart. He would leave everything in this world just to be by your side — you knew that he would.

“And till then, I’ll be right by your side, holding you close.”

This, right here, was all that you ever wanted. Just his words were enough to make all your worries go away. Because you knew, even if you didn’t have anything else, you’d always have Bucky. He was yours, and you were just as much his.

“Bucky…” you whispered as you cupped his cheek and pulled him close. His lips were soft against yours as you kissed and you were sure he could taste your salty tears. The kiss was slow and endearing like a sweet love letter shared between you.

You could feel his breath against your face as he pulled away. “Will you let me look after you?” The words were simple, but you knew what they meant. You wouldn’t love nothing more than just to submit to Bucky, and not think. “Yes please.”

It felt as if he had all the time in this world as he peppers light kisses over your face. Once your lips, cheeks, jaw, nose and forehead were covered with his love, only then he was satisfied and he pulled back. You loved feeling adored, and Bucky loved doting upon you.

Bucky slipped his hands under you and picked you up and a little giggle slipped past your lips despite everything. He still bent to place a chaste kiss to your lips as you carried you inside. Bucky just couldn’t have enough of you, and you ate this feeling up.

He placed you down on the floor once you were in the bathroom. He went past you to fill the bathtub with warm water and as you slipped your hand under your shirt to pull it up, he gestured you to stop. Once the water was warmed up to his choice, he turned back to you.

“Let me do all the work.” He said as he pulled up your shirt. You were nearly breathless by the time he discarded your clothes, one by one. “You sit in there and enjoy yourself, I’ll be back in a minute.” You opened your mouth to protest, but he shut you up with a kiss.

“Shhh… let me do all the thinking tonight. You just look pretty for me, okay?” He chuckled and you couldn’t help but smile. He waited until you dipped yourself into the warm water and only once you were settled did he leave. You nearly forgot all your worries as the hot water seeped into your pores.

You opened your eyes when you heard Bucky walk in, but you hadn’t even realised when you closed them in the first place. You gasped as you noticed the fruit plate he was carrying. “You didn’t have to do all this. I just…” you stopped talking as Bucky’s face became stern.

“I know I didn’t have to, but I want to.” Tears once again lined your eyes and you noticed the frown lines on Bucky’s face. “You’re so good to me. Too good.” You really didn’t know how you’d scored a man like Bucky. His face immediately softened and he pulled out a stool and sat on it besides the tub.

“You deserve all this.” He placed a quick peck on the tip of your nose. “See. Too good for me. I don’t know how I’ll ever give it back to you. I…” he placed a finger on your lips to stop you from babbling further. “Do you love me?” You narrowed your eyes at his question, why would he even ask that. “Of course Bucky, I love you!”

“Then that’s enough for me.” Somehow Bucky knew exactly what to say to make you melt like butter. You shifted a little such that you could lean closer to Bucky. He picked up a strawberry from the plate and placed it in front of your lips. You hummed when your teeth sank into the berry and it’s juices exploded into your mouth.

Next, Bucky fed you pieces of banana, assortments of berries, and a selection of your favourite fruits. You admired the way Bucky was intent on feeding you with his hand. He only seemed satisfied once the entire plate was empty and he kept it aside and returned his focus on you.

Bucky smiled a dorky smile as he saw the fruit juices collected at the corner of your lips. You gasped out when he bent down and licked up the juice. The action was more erotic than it was meant to and you couldn’t stop yourself from begging for more.

He positioned you such that your head was resting on his metal hand and he could easily hold your head steady for him to kiss as his other hand travelled under the soapy water. Your mouth fell open as he placed his hand on your thigh before trailing it between your legs.

You didn’t have to be told to spread your legs as his hand settled on your core. His fingers ran over your sensitive folds in gentle strokes that had you silently gasping. He played with your swollen petals until you mewled beneath him. You moaned out his name when he finally circled your needy clit.

His eyes were staring at you, intensely mapping out the small twitches in your face, as he played you to his rhythm. The water swished around as you placed your hands on the edge of the tub as Bucky kept on his ministrations. You could bet that he loved to see the effect he had on you.

His lips descended on yours and you kissed him as if you needed him more than you needed air, which was partially true. You moaned into his mouth as two of his fingers entered your sopping hole. He didn’t let you out of the kiss as he fingered you.

Bucky sucked on your tongue before nibbling on your lower lip with his teeth. He then laved his tongue on the slight bruise. You began squirming under him as you felt your sending getting close, but Bucky held you tightly in place. The water was sloshing with his fingers and your entire body felt like a live wire.

He was thrusting his thick fingers into your cunt, stretching you out, and at the same time kissing you breathless. You placed your hand on his wrist and squeezed as the coil finally snapped and this whole world dissolved into a honeyed glaze. Your entire body felt like cotton candy as it melted into the water.

Bucky kissed your eyelids as you twitched with the aftershocks. He gently pulled out his fingers and you immediately missed the fullness. You noticed that when you had squirmed, a few splashes had landed on Bucky, wetting his shirt.

He was quick to cover you with a warm towel when you stepped out of the tub. You clutched the towel to start wiping yourself, but Bucky stopped you. Let me, once again he didn’t speak, but his eyes were enough to convey the emotion.

He was sweetly caring as he dabbed the towel down your body. Started from the hands, he bent down until he could dry your legs. He picked you up again and you nearly rolled your eyes at his overprotective behaviour. “Bucky… I can walk.” You giggled as he carried you into the bedroom.

“But you don’t have to when I’m here.” You could feel his chest rumbling as he said it. He placed you on the bed and you got up on your hands to watch the show as he began undressing. He wasn’t as considerate with himself and quickly stripped down and yet to you that was the sexiest thing.

This wasn’t the first time you’d seen him naked, yet everytime you laid your eyes on him, you couldn’t help but marvel. His muscles rippled beneath his skin as he crawled up the bed towards you like a prowling wolf. His metal arm glinted in the moonlight and you put your hand out to trace the golden lines on the dark metal.

Your palm met his scruffy cheek as you pulled him down for a kiss. Your head was floaty and kiss felt like the sweetest thing in the world. You sucked on his tongue as he caressed his hand down your body. His palms, one cold and one warm, fondled your breasts and you moaned in his mouth.

You knew he was making love to you tonight and it was the most pleasant feeling ever. Your hands roamed the hard planes of his body and for a tough second it was hard to believe this man was yours, only yours. You couldn’t get enough of this sappy feeling, and you didn’t want to.

Bucky trailed down kisses to your neck from your lips and you felt like on the seventh heaven as he kept on worshiping your body. You started panting when he playfully nibbled on your skin before laving it with his tongue. You were sure tonight was going to leave behind bruises which you would proudly wear the next day.

Next, he laid fluttering pecks down your sternum before sucking on your pebbled nipple. He tweaked the other breast with his metal fingers and the contrasting sensation of his hot mouth suckling on one and his cold fingers pinching your tits had you arching your back.

Your fingers sank into his broad shoulders as he ventured lower and you were sure he’d have crescent shaped marks of your nails on his skin. He let go of your nub with a pop and settled lower. You shied away when he placed kisses on your tummy but he held you tight by your hips.

“Don’t shy away from me.” His voice was raspy and thick with lust. You could feel your heart thundering in your chest as he looked up at you, his eyes dark with desire. “You’re the prettiest person in this world.” He mumbled as he kept smothering you with kisses.

You huffed out a dry laugh and were about to speak when Bucky stopped his ministrations. “What? You don’t believe me? Do you know that everytime I look at you I feel like my heart is going to burst, because you’re so gorgeous and sweet, I can’t believe I get to have this sweetness all for me.”

Your eyes watered again, but this time it was because you believed Bucky’s sincerity. The burning passion in his eyes and this sincere tone had you wanting to melt right into him. “I need you, but I want you just as much. I love you, and you mean everything to me. You’re my choice, my one and only. And don’t you ever doubt that.”

“I won’t Bucky, I promise.” Your voice was heavy with unspoken words. “Good girl.” You weaved your hand in his silky strands and pulled him up. He grunted as he surely had other plans. “I need you Bucky. Now!” You smashed his lips against yours and placed your hands on his ass to keep him there.

A shiver ran down your spine when Bucky pressed his hard length against yours. He rubbed his head over your sopping pussy before lining himself up at your entrance. You both groaned as his thick cock entered you in a slow, yet firm stroke.

Bucky held still for a moment and only pulled back when you nodded desperately for him to move. You nearly choked on how full his cock made you feel as he speared his way back in. Your circled your arms around his neck as you couldn’t even bare to have that much space between you.

“Bucky..” you softly moaned as he held your hips while fucking up into you in a steady pace. His thrust weren’t fast or unrelenting, rather they were measured and hard, as if he wanted you to feel the way he stretched you out.

You could hear the squelch of your juices accompanied with your moans in the otherwise silent room. Your legs were shaking with the force of his thrust as his cock repeatedly hit that special spot within you. “You feel what you do to me?” You rasped.

He groaned in your ear and it was honestly the sexiest sound you had heard. His speed gradually increased and yet he wasn’t too rough. You ran your fingers down his back and you felt the way his muscles were shifting as he fucked into you. He arched his neck and cursed as you drew grooves down his back with your nails.

His placed his mouth over yours and you just breathed each other in as you were too out of it to kiss. You knew you were very close and you just needed that one thing to push you over the edge. “Tell me… tell me you love me.” You breathed out.

“I love you.”

Those three simple words were enough to you to tumble down the abyss of shattering pleasure. Your toes curled and your body trembled beneath him as he kept on thrusting within you. A few tears slipped down your eyes at the intensity and Bucky licked them up with his tongue.

Your body was at such a heightened state of pleasure that you nearly didn’t feel like you stopped orgasming. Your words were an incoherent string of moans as you couldn’t comprehend much. All that currently mattered in the world was just you and Bucky.

Your eyes snapped open when you felt Bucky’s hand around your throat. He wasn’t squeezing or even putting pressure, but the reassuring weight of his hand over your throat had you visibly calming down. He tugged on your lower lip with his finger and you licked it with your tongue.

The veins on Bucky’s neck were popping up and you wanted to sink your teeth into them. Your bodies were slick with sweat and your cheeks were decorated with tear tracks. You felt Bucky twitch within you and you knew he was close too.

Your body was more relaxed than ever and it was so sensitive due to Bucky’s previous activities, that you were sure you were about to come again. “Bu.. Bucky..!” He pressed his forehead to yours and you relished in the feeling. “Shhh… I know you can give me one more. Just one more, okay promise.”

You closed your eyes and let him play you to his tune. He grunted and cursed into your ear as he lost his rhythm and become desperate before coming deep inside you. His orgasm triggered yours and you too cascaded down with him. As you came together, you almost felt as if your souls were connected to each other.

You held each other tightly as if the other was the only lifeline back to earth. There was this deep ache within you that seemed to have vanished. You both breathed heavily as you twitched and convulsed with aftershocks. A goofy smile spread across both of your lips as you considerably calmed down.

You didn’t know how much time passed as you just stared lovingly into each other’s eyes. All your previous worries and tensions were forgotten as you gazed at Bucky as if he had all the answers in the world, which maybe he did.

You bathed in the feeling of his warmth body covering you, and an age old instinct screamed that he was protecting you from all the problems of this world. You whined with displeasure when he pulled away after some time. He chuckled as he got up to go get a wet cloth to clean you up and bent down to press a kiss to your forehead.

“Shh,.. let me just look after you.”

this is actually very self indulgent and I’ve been wanting to write this for a long time. this is my own comfort scenario and I just wanted to share it with you guys. I hope you like it as well.

Like I could ever get tired of looking at you.

Since the two of you started dating, Bucky wasn't exactly discreet with his stares. Many were on the receiving end of his grumpy gaze, but not you. Never you. He smirked whenever you caught him looking your way, his eyes soft and unwavering. Some days he couldn't quite catch his breath when you smiled back at him.

You wrapped yourself around my heart, Smartie.

His heart beat faster against his rib cage as he gazed at you. You were just as beautiful as the day you walked into his apartment, changing everything for the better. His eyes moved along the shape of your nose and lips, longing to kiss them, before they fell to your chest. His shirt covered your skin, a flare of possessiveness surging. As tempted as he was to pull you up to dance or run his hands along your body, he refrained for the time being.

I promised I'd be good. I can wait a couple more minutes.

"Buck? Buck!"

He blinked as the voice in his ear snapped him out of his trance, forgetting that he was on the phone. "What?"

"Were you even listening to me?" Steve asked.

"No," he admitted as his friend sighed.

"Staring again?"

"Yeah," he grinned.

"You know what? I'm not even mad. I'm just happy you're happy."

"Thanks," Bucky kept his gaze on you, happy that Steve understood.

"Wait, is she listening?" Steve asked. "Not that you've done much of the talking."

"Punk," he chuckled. "She's finishing up her assignment and has her headphones on, so she can't hear us."

Bucky planned a weekend away for the two of you once the semester wrapped up. You deserved the break and he wanted to give you something nice, unforgettable and special. It was tough keeping it a secret, but he didn't want to spoil the surprise.

"Does she have any idea?"

"No," his smile widened. "I can't wait."

"You know, Rebecca's going to love having a sister."

Bucky swallowed the sudden lump in his throat. "She has to say 'yes' first. And I didn't say I would ask her during the trip."

"But you are going to ask her."

"I am."

His mother's ring was one of the only keepsakes he had in his possession. For someone special. In his heart, he knew you'd love it. You weren't just his missing piece. You were his future.

"After I ask her parents. I'm old fashioned that way," he said as you began to shut down your laptop.

"We really are old men," Steve laughed.

"You may be old, but I'm doing just fine, punk. And I gotta go. Call you later," he said, hanging up when Steve said "bye".

You removed your headphones and smiled as you looked toward the table. "All finished," you announced as Bucky rested his chin on his arm. "See something you like, Stud, or do I have something on my face?"

"Just looking," he smirked.

You swiped your left hand across your cheek anyway as if to wipe it clean. The vintage ring would be a perfect fit on your finger. Steve was right. Rebecca would love you being part of the family.

As long as you say "yes".

*****

The museum was only too happy to accept and had put the collection on display in the exhibit dedicated to Steve. In their minds, these were the belongings of a dead man which could be fashioned and shown off in any way that they chose. It then became clear after the Sokovia Accords and the blip that these items belonged to someone very much alive who had so much taken from him already. The least he deserved was the opportunity to take his possessions back.

The museum extended the olive branch to Bucky who could only bring himself to be here and face his past life because you’d agreed to come with him.

“Now, as I said before, you’re free to take anything you like. The rest we will either use for the Captain America exhibit or we will preserve.” The clerk explained as you reached the door, again intended for Bucky but instead being directed towards you.

Bucky had internalised his feelings about being presented with relics of his old life. He’d moved on and had settled into the modern age, adjusting to life after Hydra. He met and married you, the love of his life and someone he was always destined to find. Even if he had found another way to the present, or you had somehow found your way to the past; Bucky truly believed that you would always have found each other.

Nonetheless, your timeline had manifested the way it did; with years of Bucky in captivity and then having to adapt and recover in a new world. He thought himself an entirely different person now and was terrified of having to face his old life. The anxiety that he wouldn’t be able to recognise his old self made his chest tighten and he held on to your hand tightly in a desperate attempt to ground himself.

“You ready, Buck?” You asked softly, giving his hand another gentle squeeze and rubbed your thumb over his knuckles soothingly.

“Yeah.” Bucky sighed, finally acknowledging the clerk and giving him a nod. Your husband took a deep breath as the door was unlocked and opened for him.

The little room containing Bucky’s things was eery. Everything was folded and presented neatly for his inspection on tables that ran along the length of a room. Bucky scanned everything, recognising them but not feeling a claim over them in any way. It was like these objects had belonged to a ghost and he would be a thief if he dared to take anything from their special place.

After assessing that Bucky wouldn’t make the first move, you took some careful steps towards the table to observe the items on display. You nonchalantly inspected each item, ghosting your fingertips over them. Your ability to make this look like not such a big deal inspired Bucky to follow after you. He didn’t need to be so scared: he had you.

Your fingertips had landed on his cap that sat atop his neatly folded war uniform. You traced along the edges of it and felt the roughness of the old fabric on your skin.

“I made Steve try that on when they first gave me my uniform, it looked so funny and large on his small head.” Bucky chuckled sheepishly, looking down and playing with his hands.

It was the first time Bucky had said a full sentence all day and it had taken you by surprise. Looking up at him, you met his gaze and gave him an animated smile which invited him to tell you more.

“Well, Steve was the one that actually wanted to go to war. I was drafted. I uh… I wanted to make him feel like part of it, you know? He was always doing stupid stuff like getting into fights he’d never win. I thought if he tried on the uniform that it would get the stupid idea out of his head.” Bucky continued.

He looked at your eager face and realised you hadn’t said anything in a while. “I’m sorry, sweetheart. I’m droning on.” He quickly said and went back to rubbing his vibranium thumb in little circles on the palm of his flesh hand.

“No please, tell me more.” You encouraged, perfectly content to listen to his stories from the 40s that Bucky rarely, if ever, shared with you. In truth, it sometimes felt like your husband had a double life and the side from the 40s was something that you were not permitted entry to. It seemed that you knew more about his time as the winter soldier rather than as the young man from Brooklyn who took pretty girls out on a Friday night with his scrawny friend and was dragged into a war he didn’t want to fight in.

“Well,” Bucky started, shuffling closer to the table to get a better look at everything. His hand found its way to the small of your back and it stayed there, being steadied both physically and mentally by you. It made you grin and as you looked up at him you could see the stern concentration of his face while his brain processed the memories.

“This isn’t anything special, it’s just a watch my dad gave to me.” He explained as he landed on a simple watch with a small round face and a brown leather strap. “Although, he did always say that it was important to never be late, so I guess it taught me a valuable lesson. And have I ever been late?”

You giggled and shook your head in response to his question which he had partnered with a cheeky grin. “No, baby. You were always on time for our dates. Picked me up at the exact times you said you would.”

“Exactly.” He smiled warmly at you. “Couldn’t have my best girl waiting.”

Bucky looked at the clerk as if for permission before putting the watch on but then a tinge of embarrassment flushed as he realised he didn’t need to. It was his watch; he could take it or leave it as he pleased. His focus returned to the watch and soon it found itself back on his wrist where it belonged.

It ignited a new confidence in Bucky as he stood up a little straighter and analysed the remaining items on the table with more purpose. He let out a chuckle as he picked up a book that was obviously from a bygone era from the cover design but was otherwise perfectly preserved. Your eyes followed Bucky’s fingers as he traced shapes on the mountains on the hardback cover. It was a copy of Tolkien’s The Hobbit.

“Sam will laugh when he hears about this.” Bucky said. “He seemed to be surprised that I knew about Gandalf. But I read this when it first came out, way before the movies were released.”

“Who knew my husband was such a nerd?” You smirked and pinched his side playfully. Bucky let out a hearty laugh; his eyes creased and he flashed those brilliant white teeth. It made your heart do a victory leap to see him relax and get more comfortable. The anxiety that had plagued him before coming here was ebbing away by the second.

“I hope this isn’t a dealbreaker for you.” He joked, rubbing his thumbs over the book as if he was considering purchasing it in a store.

“Of course not.” You kissed his cheek and rubbed his back. “Are you gonna take it?”

“I don’t know,” he shrugged. “I have a copy of it on the Kindle you got me for Christmas.”

“Yeah, but this is beautiful, and –“ you opened the front cover of the book “it’s a first edition! Bucky, if you don’t take it then I will!”

“Alright, alright!” Bucky chuckled and sat it down to the side so he could review more of his possessions.

A ring sat in the middle of everything and you might have missed it if you weren’t looking for it. Instinctively, Bucky grabbed it and picked it up. The smile on his face from earlier had been replaced with a frown and his lip quivered slightly.

“This was mom’s ring! I wish Rebecca had kept that.” Bucky sighed, holding on to the ring with both of his thumbs, as though it would shatter if he dropped it. “I know she wanted me to have it, to give to my wife, but Rebecca deserved to hold on to it. She thought I was dead afterall.”

It was a pretty ring; a gold band with lilac oval stones forming a flower shape. It was probably a very grand thing for a working class woman of her time to own.

“It’s a very pretty ring, Buck. At least it’s with its rightful owner now.” You commented in a bid to reassure him.

“Well actually, you’re its rightful owner,” Bucky smiled lightly at you. “Like I said, mom wanted me to give it to my wife. Sorry it arrived a little late. I would have liked to have proposed to you with it but I thought it was lost forever.”

You thanked him by putting your hand to the back of his head and pulling his face in to press a loving kiss to his forehead. The gesture left you feeling grateful to have been trusted with something clearly so precious to Bucky. For a long time now, you had been used to being the only family that Bucky had. This introduction into his old life had admittedly, made you feel a bit alienated. It was the life he was supposed to have but he was cruelly stripped of. Whilst you had accepted that you would never have the relationship with Rebecca and his parents that you had wanted, it still stung that the opportunity had been snatched from both you and him.

Bucky giving you this ring and connecting his old life with his new one reminded you that in every circumstance, in every chain of events, in every universe: he was meant to find you.

“Bucky, I don’t know what to say.” You eventually offered. Bucky lifted your hand to try and put the ring on one of your fingers but it became clear very quickly that it was not going to fit. It only deepened the severity of his frown.

“I mean, we can always go somewhere to get that fixed. People can do that right? Alter the size of rings?” Bucky started to panic, fixating on the ring with fierce concentration as though his staring was a magical power that would change the size of it.

You offered a small smile in response, also disappointed that the ring wouldn’t fit. It seemed to invalidate your earlier theory that he was meant to find you. If it were true, the ring would have fit perfectly.

Nevertheless, you mulled it over. That ring wasn’t a symbol of Bucky’s love for you; the one already on your left hand which he had picked out carefully and specifically was. This was his mother’s ring, a Barnes family heirloom. He was its rightful owner and the one most deserving to hold on to it. An idea formulated in your head as you spotted Bucky’s dog tags peeping out of the collar of his t-shirt.

Without warning, you reached up and pulled the chain over his head and undid the clasp. You took the ring from Bucky’s now trembling fingers and fed it through the chain so that the ring sat next to the tags, making a rather chunky necklace.

You presented it back to him with an explanation. “Now you’ll always have a piece of your mom to carry round with you. Then, when you give your tags to me when you go on missions, I’ll take care of her for you and we can wait together on our Bucky coming home.”

Bucky swallowed thickly, overwhelmed at how thoughtful and sincere you were. He tried to speak several times but his throat closed over and kept him silent. You gave him a small smile and put the tags round his neck again and he immediately clasped his flesh hand over the ring now situated on his chest over his heart. You ran your fingers through his hair slowly to ground him.

“I love you.” He choked out eventually, still holding on to the ring as though it would disappear if he let go.

“I know,” you smiled. “I love you too.”

Bucky inhaled deeply as he took one last scan over the items. He put his hand on a small antique frame containing a sepia tone photograph of Bucky in his war uniform and a girl who looked a lot younger than him who you deduced as being Rebecca.

Rebecca had sat on a chair while Bucky stood next to her with his hands behind his back – a pose that had made him look older and wiser than he probably had been when the picture was taken. It was like a picture your grandparent would show you so that you may have an insight on their youth. Instead, you recognised your husband that you had found yourself only too lucky to wake up to everyday. The only difference was the man standing next to you had a vibranium arm and the weight of years of atrocities on his shoulders.

“She’d have really liked you, you know?” Bucky finally said, tracing his thumb over Rebecca’s face.

“Do you think so?” You asked, peering over his shoulder to get a better look at the photograph. This was the only connection you had to his sister and you studied her image in hopes it might make you understand her better.

“I know so.” He asserted. “She’d see how happy you make me and that would be all that mattered.”

“You make me really happy too, Bucky.” You grinned and gave his back another quick rub. His gaze was still concentrating on the picture and you decided it was best to let him have a moment with his sister. You picked up The Hobbit and made your way over to the door to wait on him. He stood in contented silence for a few more moments before straightening his back and coming over to join you.

“Did you get everything you wanted?” The clerk addressed Bucky after having waited outside while you both toured Bucky’s past.

“Do you have a copy of this picture?” Bucky asked, completely ignoring the question posed to him and held up the picture of him and Rebecca so he could see.

“We do, sir. We keep copies and scans of everything.”

“Well, I think you should put it in the exhibit.” Bucky said, taking another look down at the picture. “If you wanna tell my story, you gotta tell hers too.”

“Sure, Sergeant Barnes, I’ll pass that on.” The clerk enthusiastically agreed and led the way out while you and Bucky followed leisurely.

“That was a nice thing you did for Rebecca, I’m so proud of you.” You beamed at him. He put his arm round you and flashed you one of his perfect and pearly white smiles that never failed to bring out a rose tint on your cheeks.

“She deserves it.” He replied and kissed your temple gently. “Thank you for coming today. I didn’t want to face this on my own.”

Your arm found its way round his back and your hand rested on his hip, sighing contentedly. “I would do anything for you, Buck.”

“I’d do anything for you too.”

Both of you felt a sense of vitality and freshness as you left the building, despite the items you were leaving with being decades old. The nervous man you’d came here with this morning had been left behind and, in his place, had emerged an assured and satisfied one. The watch, novel, ring and photograph seemed unnoteworthy on their own but they closed the gap between Bucky’s life with you and his life in the 40s in your mind. There was no longer a divide between you and Rebecca and his parents; now unionised with these remnants of his old life and with your love for Bucky.

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The day everything changed started out like every normal day. Morning light streamed into your bedroom, warming your skin. You rolled over, arms reaching out to cuddle with your boyfriend. You nuzzled your face into the crook of his neck, his laughter rough from just waking up. He rubbed your back, placing his chin on top of your head, pressing gentle kisses on your hairline. 

“Babe, we need to get up.” He whispered gently, twirling strands of your hair between his fingers. You groaned, leaning your head back, shaking it. 

“No we don’t, we can just stay in bed all day and sleep.” He chuckled, shaking his head, sitting up. You followed, grumbling under your breath, once more dragging laughter out of your boyfriend. He got dressed, his metal arm whirring as he pulled on a sweatshirt. You donned sweatpants and an oversized shirt, smirking as Bucky recognized what you were wearing. 

“Is that mine?” He pointed at the shirt, a soft smile spreading on his face. You crossed your arms, innocently looking to the side. 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” You giggled as Bucky chased you around playfully, catching you as you ran to the kitchen. His arms wrapped around your waist, pulling you close to his chest. Both of you took a moment to catch your breath, laughter filling your lungs. You smiled as Bucky kissed your neck, releasing you from his grip. You opened the fridge, rummaging for anything that could be eaten as breakfast. You were about to ask Bucky if he wanted some cold orange chicken for a nutritious first meal when his phone went off. You looked over to see him answer the call, his face solemn and stony. He looked at you and mouthed an apology. You nodded, understanding. He sped out the front door, not before pressing a kiss to your cheek, the door locking automatically behind him. You sighed, grabbing a bowl and pouring some cereal along with milk in it. You walked around for a few minutes, bare feet on the cold floor, munching on the Cheerios as you pondered what you were going to do. Maybe read a book or finally start that Netflix show that had been sitting in your watchlist for months. Just as you grabbed the remote, balancing your bowl in one hand, you noticed something on the floor. Scrunching your eyebrows in confusion, you took one more bite of your cereal before setting it down and walking over. Your eyes widened as you realized what it was. 

Bucky’s journal. 

You picked up the notebook, running your finger down its spine as you bit your lip. Thoughts ran through your mind, telling you to read it. You shook your head, placing the journal on the coffee table, making your way back to your cereal. But as the show started, all you could think about were the contents inside that small book. Rolling your eyes and groaning, you got up to grab the notebook. You paused your show, biting the inside of your cheek as you hesitantly opened the journal. What you saw made you collapse on the couch. 

“Oh, Bucky.” You murmured as you read the names. The names of the victims of the Winter Soldier. You knew how he was making amends, how he was trying to atone for actions that weren’t his, how he- wait. Was that-? Your breath started to pick up as you saw your brother’s name, a side note next to it. 

In Progress. 

Tears blurred your vision as you slammed the journal shut, shaking your head. 

“Y/N…” a soft voice made your head shoot up to see Bucky Barnes standing in front of you, a scared look on his face. You hardened your expression, leaning on your knees as the journal hung limp in your hands. 

“Tell me,” you swallowed, fear tightening in your throat, “Tell me this doesn’t mean what I think it does.” Bucky broke his gaze from yours, looking up towards the ceiling. 

“Why did you read it?” he whispered to himself, his voice breaking. You slammed the journal down on the couch beside you, standing up furiously. 

“Tell me!” You yelled, fists clenching and tears welling up in your eyes. Bucky nodded, still not making eye contact. You take a step forward, lips trembling. 

“Buck-” Your broken voice seemed to break something inside of him. He threw his hands up in the air, a pained cry springing from his lips. 

“I killed him! I killed your brother, Y/N and I am trying to-” Your laughter interrupted him, confusion spreading across his face. You shake your head, laughing. 

“You think that’s why I’m angry? My brother’s death I’ve had years to mourn and don’t you even think about blaming yourself for it. You were brainwashed, James.” Bucky flinched at the use of his name, your cold tone indicating how angry you were. 

“I’m mad,” your voice trembled, tears streaming down your face, “because in that journal, that stupid journal, it says ‘in progress’ next to his name. Is that what I am to you? What this is? A way for you to feel better about yourself?” Bucky shook his head rapidly, stepping towards you, his heart breaking as you stepped back. You pointed a finger at him, recalling the first time you met. 

“That day in the library, why did you approach me? Did you know I would be there?” Bucky was silent before he nodded, that simple response made your stomach drop. You let out a sob before you picked up the journal, sniffing as you nodded to yourself. 

“So this,” you gestured to the space between you and Bucky, looking down at the ground, “This is just another way for you to make amends? I’m just another name in your journal to cross out? Oh god, has this all been a lie?” Your hands started to shake, making you drop the journal as you wrapped your arms around yourself. Bucky hurried to stand in front of you, reaching up to cradle your face in his hands. His head was shaking rapidly, tears falling down his cheeks as he spoke. 

“No, no, Y/N, this is real, this has always been real, please-” You pushed him off of you, pushing the journal into his chest as you ran to your room. You grabbed a bag, stuffing any piece of clothing you saw in your closet which was yours. Bucky appeared in the doorway, trembling at what he saw. 

“What, what are you doing? No, please Y/N, come on, please!” He wrapped his arms around you, your back to his chest as you both sobbed. You struggled in his arms, hitting the vibranium in tune with your cries. 

“Let me go!” You cried out, desperate to get out of the house. Bucky shook his head, desperate to keep you in his arms. 

“No, baby, please, this is real, please believe me.” He whispered into your hair, his tears dampening your head. Softly, you pushed yourself out of his arms, turning to face him. You saw the smallest flicker of hope flash inside his eyes. You let out a laugh stained with tears. 

“You know, I thought I was so lucky. Bucky Barnes actually wanted me, me, a washed up history major with little to no future. I mean, what are the odds of running into an Avenger while browsing for books?” As you continued, you saw Bucky’s face drop as he realized what you were saying. 

“I’ve loved you since the beginning James. I almost had a heart attack when you asked me out to a movie. I thought I was so special but I guess,” you choked on your tears, biting down on your lip, “I guess I never was. This can’t be real, James, you obviously don’t go around dating relatives of victims, so you never meant for this to happen.” You grabbed your bag, sobbing as you remembered how this morning started and now how it ended. Bucky stood still, his chest heaving as he quietly sobbed. 

“Please.” he whispered, the sound enough to further break your heart. You stood on your toes, pressing a tear stained kiss to his cheek. 

“I’m sorry, Bucky, but I can’t be with someone just because they feel guilty about something in the past.” You start to walk away, pausing in the doorframe, looking over your shoulder. 

“I, I love you James.” You whispered quietly, unaware if he heard you or not. After that, you sped out of the house, not paying attention to where you were going but only focusing on the fact you had to get away. 

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Bucky stood in the bedroom for what felt like hours. He held his journal in his hand, trembling as the weight of what transpired hit him. He grabbed a pen and roughly opened the journal. With dark, heavy, and messy strokes he crossed out your brother’s name, tears falling and mixing with the ink. He threw the journal down, collapsing against the edge of the bed, head falling between his knees as he sobbed. It was real, he kept reminding himself. It was real, it was real, it was real. He took deep breaths, leaning his head back against the mattress before quickly standing up and running out of the house. 

All in all, though, it wasn’t as bad as you had presumed it would be. There were less guests than expected — still too much for your liking, but seventy or so close friends and family members was actually nothing given the situation. The schedule wasn’t too tight, with small trips to some must see things on the island during the day and evening activities in the hotel bar. The karaoke had been ridiculous and you still weren’t over the fact that Noa had invited strippers last night — Was that usual wedding stuff? You doubted it. — but all in all you could sneak off often enough to keep yourself sane. At least Noa had been wise enough not to choose you as a bridesmaid, so you didn’t have to feel all too guilty about leaving in the middle of a dance evening.

One thing you appreciated about this never ending wedding was the hotel’s abundance of pools. The hotel was more of a little park either way, the rooms being scattered over multiple smaller buildings, each of which had their own pool. Thus you had the luxury of just needing to open your back door if you wanted to take a swim.

You were floating in the water on your back, looking at the cloudless night sky and admiring the stars. The actual wedding ceremony was tomorrow, and you wondered where you’d find the mental energy for another taxing day just when you heard footsteps. You shifted your position, swam to the side and looked up to see the guy who was staying in the room opposite of yours taking a seat in one of the lounge chairs by the pool.

Bucky Barnes was the groom’s best friend. Moreover, he was Sam’s best man. However he did clearly hated the whole ordeal even more than you did. He said little, left the evening activities early and showed up late for breakfast. On the other hand he had helped you up the tricky path up to one of the best viewing points of the island, taking your hand and supporting your back multiple times. He regularly brought you something to drink, with some off hand comment about the importance of staying hydrated, and every evening he sat next to your during dinner. Being just as taken aback by the strippers, he’d joined you in your escape and you’d taken a swom together in this pool.

You had asked if the water wouldn’t cause his metal arm to corrode. He had nicely pointed out to you that it was a vibranium arm and vibranium doesn’t just corrode.

Right now he looked mentally corroded however. Emptied out. The upper few buttons of his black shirt were undone, showing just a bit of his chest hair. 

You rested your arms on the pool side, placing your chin on your folded hands and asked, ‘Well, Mr. Barnes, shouldn’t you be out there? Fulfilling your best man’s duties?’

Bucky scowled. ‘I think I’m gonna steal a boat and get the hell out of here.’

‘Well, if that’s the case, can I come with?’ you asked, raising an eyebrow.

‘I think the bride will kill me if I steal you away,’ he said with a small smile.

You laughed. ‘I think the bride will be highly amused if you stole me away, Bucky. She has been pointing out every single person at this wedding, hoping someone will catch my interest.’

Noa meant well. The lack of romance in your life hadn’t bothered you before, but now that all your friends were starting to get married the lack of any romantic or even just sexual experience was starting to become all too obvious. God, you’re first and only kiss had been with a girl you’d had a crush on, when you and your friends had been playing spin the bottle. That was years ago now. Since then you hadn’t had a crush on anyone and the idea of romance or sex had seemed just too much effort to bother. But with all these weddings you were starting to feel as if you were… missing out. Which was stupid, but it was how you felt. So Noa had taken it up on herself to not only have her luxury pacific island wedding dreams fulfilled, but to also get you at least interested in somebody.

Now, interested: she had also slipped a condom in your purse. At least she was urging you to hook up with somebody responsibly.

‘Well, and did someone catch your interest?’ Bucky asked.

You shrugged. ‘Your plan to get off this island interests me.’

He sat up a bit straighter, then leaned his elbows on his knees, . ‘Are you always such a tease?’

You blinked and felt your cheeks getting a bit warmer. Had you been teasing him? You opened your mouth, but didn’t say a thing.

Bucky laughed apologetically, ‘Sorry. I shouldn’t be taunting you.’

‘You really shouldn’t,’ you grumbled, pushing yourself up to sit on the side of the pool. One thing you at least had learned was to just be open about your lack of experience: thus you could avoid most really awkward situations. ‘I’m just going to be completely honest with you: I have no experience with any of that. I mean, romance, relationships, sex. Flirting. So, that’s that.’ Then you frowned. ‘Not that I think we were flirting, were we?’

Bucky nodded slowly, his eyes a bit bigger than usual and you suddenly noticed he was looking at you. Really looking. ‘Well, I’m just going to say that when you’re sitting there in that skimpy bikini, calling me Mr. Barnes and telling me you want to sneak off with me, I kind of… start hoping you are flirting with me.’

You lowered your eyes at the honey yellow two piece you were wearing, water droplets falling of your skin.

‘Oh.’

‘But that’s just me,’ he added quickly. ‘Sorry.’

He got up, turned away from you, but then he froze. He turned back around and took a deep breath. ‘I’m not as good at this anymore as I used to be. But, okay… Fuck, I don’t want to sound like a pervert, but if you want…’ He sighed, slid his right hand through his hair and then said, ‘If you want experience I could help you out with that.’

You forgot how to think for a moment.

He covered his eyes with his hand. ‘Fuck, I’m sorry, just forget —’

‘No!’ you interrupted him, rather clumsily getting on your feet. ‘I just…’

You just were caught by surprise. It seemed surreal. Yes, for the most part you seldom really got crushes, but you also had been convinced to some extent that you yourself couldn’t be regarded as desirable whatsoever. You didn’t get called pretty, only got comments on your outfits from your mother or Noa. . Parallel experiences went for your character: you just didn’t stand out, you easily disappeared into the background. At least, didn’t feel like you did. You didn’t receive phone numbers, you didn’t get flirted with. So that was why you hadn’t really thought twice about what you had been wearing until Bucky had pointed it out. That was why you hadn’t noticed your teasing could have been mistaken for flirting. Or why you hadn’t even considered that maybe he had been trying to flirt with you. Because he had, hadn’t he?

Just the idea that a man as handsome as Bucky would be interested in you in such a way — you wouldn’t ever have dared to dream of it.

‘I just wasn’t expecting that,’ you finished finally, shivering a bit as a night breeze brushed along  your wet skin. ‘It’s… Since you’re offering, I’d like some help.’

You were a bit astonished by your own words. Maybe, with your complete lack of activity in this field, it would’ve been better to take it more slowly, more carefully. But Bucky seemed really decent to you, so it prompted you to throw your hesitance aside. And those blue eyes helped a lot.

A shadow of a smile sneaked over Bucky’s lips as he cocked his head, ‘Let’s get you inside, princess.’

He wrapped his right arm around you, pulling you close and you leaned into his touch.

‘Princess?’ you asked, looking up at him.

He only hummed, helping you on the steps to the backdoor. Once inside your room, you excused yourself for a moment and sneaked of in the bathroom, drying of a bit and putting the bathrobe the hotel provided. When you exited the bathroom again, feet pattering on the floor, Bucky had drawn the curtains and was looking at the book you’d left on the side table in the small sitting room.

‘You want something to drink?’ you offered him, slipping past him to open the fridge. ‘I have beer, beer and soda, oh, beer, and white wine.’

‘I’ll have whatever you have.’

So you poured yourselves two glasses of wine. The thing was, there was only one armchair. Nothing else. As you’d handed him his glass, you stood staring at the situation for a small while. He let out a deep sigh and sat down in the chair. What had your heart jumping was him taking your wrist and pulling you down until you sat on his lap.

‘Is this okay?’ he asked.

You nodded and raised your glass to him. You toasted and you looked him in the eyes as you sipped your wine.

‘I am starting to suspect, Mr. Barnes,’ you said, ‘that Noa thought a very great deal about the room distribution.’

‘I think she has done an amazing job,’ he commented.

He took another sip of wine and put his glass on the little side table. 

Goosebumps started to spread over your skin as he wrapped his right arm around you, just so his fingers were brushing your hip. His other hand, the metal one, he placed on your knee.

‘Is this okay?’ he asked again.

‘I’m inexperienced. Not breakable,’ you noted. ‘But yes. This is okay, Bucky.’

‘When you say inexperienced, you mean…’

‘I once kissed someone when playing spin the bottle,’ you told him honestly. ‘That’s it.’

‘No relationships?’

‘Possibly when I was a kindergartener,’ you offered, in a mumble you added, ‘Sorry.’

‘Why are you apologising?’ He rubbed your cheek with his thumb and your heart skipped a beat.

‘It’s a bit embarrassing, I guess,’ you murmured. ‘People seem to think that I’m a prude. Which I’m not.’

Bucky smirked a bit, and put his thumb against your chin, to make you look at him. ‘Oh, so some experience?’

‘Completely on my own.’ You slipped his hand of you and took a sip of wine. More boldly than you actually felt you told him, ‘Let’s say I still have my virginity in the sense that I haven’t been with anybody else. Physically, I took care of business myself.’ You squinted your eyes a bit. ‘Does that put you off? Were you hoping to have an innocent, sweet, little virgin on your lap? One who has never brought herself to orgasm?’

‘You are quite a vixen,’ he commented, a laugh melting into his voice. ‘But no. It doesn’t put me off. If anything, I am set upon letting you see why I could take better care of you than you yourself.’

He was looking at you attentively. You wanted to drown in that gaze. 

‘Hm, we’ll see. But I’m really adept at it.’ 

‘Undoubtedly,’ he admitted. ‘Not to kill the mood, though, but if we’re going to do this, we should do it safely.’

‘Noa thought it through very well,’ you told him. ‘There’s a condom in my purse.’ You nodded at the item by the foot or your bed.

‘She really planned this all out,’ Bucky said, nodding with a thoughtful look in his eyes.

‘I wondered what made her so convinced you and I wouldn’t mind each other’s company,’ you thought aloud.

‘Probably knew we would be sneaking off half the time to avoid any more small talk,’ he said.

‘Yeah, that would be it.’

‘Though, normally I would’ve just asked you out,’ he leaned his head against the back rest, ‘brought you flowers and taken you to dinner. Maybe if you’d suffered my presence for three dates I would’ve thought it alright to do any of this.’

‘What is different now?’

He bit his lower lip for a moment, and then said in a softer voice, ‘You look really nice in that bikini.’

You laughed, shaking your head. While you took another sip of wine, he added, ‘Also I’m under the impression you’re a bit lonely, princess. Is that right?’

You handed him your glass of wine, which he put aside for you. Tilting your head a bit you studied his face for a moment. Lowering your gaze, you let a hand drift over his abdomen.

‘Maybe,’ you answered him with a bit of nonchalance. ‘Am I right in thinking that you’re a bit lonely, too?’

Your fingers reached the part of his shirt that was undone. Swallowing you let your fingertips skim across his naked skin. His Adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed and you don’t know what thrilled you the most: the reaction or the knowledge you had caused it.

‘You don’t have to,’ he muttered, gently taking hold of your hand.

You caught his eyes and suddenly you were very sure of what you wanted.

‘Bucky,’ you said softly, shifting your position until you were straddling him. ‘You’re a lonely man. I’m a lonely woman. I want you to touch me and I think that you want to touch me. So please, if only for tonight, could we get drunk on each other’s touch?’

He held his breath for a moment, but he did wrap his arms around you, pulling you close.

‘Just to be really clear, princess, you want to have sex?’ he asked, holding your gaze, ‘You want your first time to be with me?’

You rolled your eyes. As if you hadn’t been clear enough already.

 ‘Look, I could get my calendar and we could schedule when you’re going to take me on those three dates,’ you said leaning into him, both of your hands flat on his firm chest, ‘But I am wearing only this, sitting in your lap and getting very comfortable. Very. So yes I want my first time to be with you. At least if you’ll have me.’

You had leaned into him more, so your lips were only just not brushing over his. He cupped the back of your head with his right hand, muttering, ‘I’m going to take good care of you, princess. Really good care.’

He pulled you closer, your lips finally meeting. It was a much better kiss than your first one. He kissed you slowly, giving you time to get used to the intricate motions. Eyes fluttering you wrapped your arms around his neck, relishing the feeling of his lips caressing yours. You pulled away a bit in surprise when you felt his tongue on your lips, causing him to chuckle just a bit. The next time the tip of his tongue skimmed over your lips, you opened your mouth. Bucky slid the bathrobe of off you, letting the cloth fall of your body until you were only left in your damp bikini. Then he let his hands wander lower, rubbing your thighs in leisurely motions for a while. A delightful shiver tickled down your spine as he dug his fingers in your flesh. The longer the kiss lasted, the fuzzier you felt, the warmer your skin got. You had never thought a kiss could be so soothing, so intoxicating.

Moaning ever so softly, you tried to press your body closer to his, grinding your hips against his. Your eyes flew open, when you felt the bulge rubbing against you. When the friction caused your cunt to clench around nothing.

You hadn’t even noticed that you’d fully broken the kiss, until Bucky whispered against your mouth, ‘Do you feel what you do to me, princess?’

A bit dumbfounded you just asked, ‘I did that?’

‘You,’ he affirmed and he starting placing fleeting kisses along your jaw. ‘Go on, don’t be shy.’ His mouth brushed over your neck. ‘I know you liked that.’

He was right of course. And you weren’t going to try and prove him wrong, so you just gave into the ache and ground yourself against him. He for his part started kissing your neck, pausing at a spot that made you tremble just a bit. Wrapping his lips around the tender skin, he started to suck, dragging a deep sigh out of you.

Encouraged by his hands gripping your hips, you kept on rubbing yourself against him. You could feel him getting harder, every motion just more rousing than the last. Your breath became heavier as you were starting to get more and more lost in the feeling. Your cunt was throbbing, making a dripping mess out of your bikini bottoms, wet enough to leave a spot on Bucky’s jeans. You didn’t mind however, you were enjoying yourself too much.

‘Feeling good, princess?’ he asked, smiling tauntingly at you.

You nodded, wetting your lips. ‘I think I’m making a mess, though.’

‘Filthy girl,’ he purred. He stole another kiss from you, as his fingers started to tug at your bikini top. ‘I think that I know just what you need.’

Mouth watering you froze as he untied the shoulder straps from your bikini, exposing your breasts. The dampness against the cold air of the room, made your nipples stiffen.

‘Won’t you look at that,’ he whispered.

Not even bothering to take the garment off he wrapped his mouth around one of your nipples. Shoulders tensing, you grabbed a handful of his hair. His tongue was lapping eagerly at your nipple, while his hands were roaming your breasts greedily, trying to grab as much of you as he possibly could. You were dizzy with feverish need, rubbing yourself against him with more urgency. You paused a moment as you had found an angle with caused an awfully good pressure on your clit and then set to repeating the motion, getting yourself drunk on the caresses against your sensitive nub and Bucky’s mouth and hands on your breasts.

‘Bucky,’ you moaned, and the next words fell out of your mouth without you even realising what you were saying, ‘I want to taste you.’

He grunted against your skin, and allowed you to slip of his lap. Pushing against his firm thighs you spread his legs so you could sit between them on your knees. Biting your lip, you slid one hand over his thigh, towards the bulge where his cock was pressing against the cloth of his jeans. You looked up and found yourself getting warm and fuzzy by the way he looked at you: that intense stare, his lips a bit parted and his hands gripping the armrests tightly.

‘I’m not sure what to do, Mr. Barnes,’ you said, although you had your ideas.

Bucky hissed a curse. He slid his tongue along his teeth visibly before telling you, ‘Take it out, princess.’ You did as you were told, but took your sweet unzipping his jeans and tugging them down his hips just a bit. You slid your fingers under the waistband of his pants, and your breath hitched when your fingers met his warm, hard cock. Swallowing you wrapped your fingers around him and pulled him out. Your eyes went big as you saw just how big he was. Though you couldn’t help how your mouth started watering at the sight of his throbbing cock, the head of which was flushed red with need. The droplet of pre-cum on the tip looked to nice to ignored and your head completely empty you leaned in and licked it up.

‘Eager girl,’ Bucky murmured.

He placed his left hand against your head, the metal cool against your warm body. You backed away again after having licked up the droplet, looking up at him.

‘Sir?’ you asked.

You had always known you had a rather submissive side to you. But you had never realised just how fulfilling it would feel to give in to it. Even more so when this wonderful man was clearly so into it.

‘Spit on my cock, princess,’ he instructed you.

You let some saliva dribble from your lips onto his tip, looking at the wetness sliding along his shaft entranced.

‘Spread it.’

Humming you wrapped one hand around him and stroked him slowly. The wet sound the motions created were satisfying in an absolutely filthy way.

‘Use both hands.’ His voice was bit hoarse.

You grabbed him with your other hand and rather clumsily you started to stroke him, looking for a rhythm. You eventually settled for an alternation between slow, leisure strokes and faster ones. He breathed out trembling a bit, and nodded approvingly.

‘That’s it, sweetheart. Doing so well.’ You smiled at his praise. ‘Take — fuck — Take me in your mouth. Just the tip.’

You swallowed before leaning in and wrapping your lips around the head of his cock. Instinctively you started swirling your tongue along him. All the while you kept on stroking him, using spit that started to drip from your lips. Bucky made a deep, grunting sound and tightened the grip on your head.

‘You think you can take more of me in your mouth, princess?’

Instead of responding, you sank down his cock some more, until he was filling your mouth completely. Grabbing the base of his cock with one hand you started to bob your head, hollowing your cheeks a bit.

‘Hm, you look so pretty like this,’ he mused in a deep sigh. ‘Lips wrapped around my cock, tits bouncing with your movements.’

He bucked his hips, causing the tip of his dick to hit your throat. Taken by surprise you backed away, saliva stringing between your lips and his glistening cock.

‘Sorry, sweetheart.’ He exhaled. ‘Your mouth just feels so nice.’

‘I could try, sir,’ you offered. ‘To take you in my mouth completely.’

Something sparked in his eyes. ‘Are you sure?’

In way of response, you took him in your mouth again, palms flat on his thighs. This time you let his cock slip deeper. You had to fight your gag reflex, but still you didn’t back away — didn’t want to.

And even if you had want to slip away, with Bucky’s hand keeping your head down you had no way to move.

‘Fuck,’ Bucky hissed, and you knew by the way his body shifted under your hands that he was doing all he could to not rock his hips into you. ‘That’s it, princess. So pretty chocking on my cock. Jesus, that’s —’

He pulled you off him suddenly. Eyes watering you looked up at him, swallowing. 

‘Did I do something wrong?’ you asked him, a bit confused.

He laughed, his breathing heavy, and shook his head. ‘I was about to come in that warm, wet, little mouth of yours, princess.’

‘Oh.’

‘Oh,’ he confirmed with a nod. He wrapped his arms around your waist, helping you stand up. You were barely on your legs again or he was already kissing you. ‘Let’s get you on the bed, sweetheart.’

In a rather clumsy manner he pulled you to the bed, his hands roaming your body and his lips on yours. He made you lie down back on the mattress, and as soon as your head hit the pillows you felt hyper conscious of what was happening.

You were lying on an overtly comfortable bed, legs spread, bikini top still on, but with the shoulders straps untied as to leave your breasts exposed, and your lips were wet with the pre-cim and saliva of the man standing at the foot of the bed, looking down at you in this completely ruined state.

And fuck, he was lazily stroking himself to the sight of you.

‘Just a minute ago you were eagerly choking on my cock and now you are trying to cover yourself up.’ Only when he made the comment, did you realise that you had indeed tried to cover your breasts with your arm. ‘Don’t be ashamed, love. You look wonderful.’

As if to emphasise his words, he leaned in and started kissing your inner thighs. Your mouth fell open and you pushed yourself up on your elbows to look at him.

‘So soft,’ he whispered against your skin.

He trailed one finger over your covered slit, slowly but with pressure. You tensed your shoulders and looked at him pleadingly. Cheek resting against your thigh, he looked at his finger trailing over your aching cunt through your bikini bottoms.

‘I don’t think these are wet just from your little swim, princess,’ he commented, gaze shifting to your face. ‘Is that right?’

You nodded.

‘Use your words, princess.’

‘Yes, sir. I’m… Please. Take them off.’

He clicked his tongue against the roof of his mouth. ‘Well, since you’re being such a good girl.’

Good girl. Your mind short-circuited, until you were only filled with the desire to be his good girl.

What the fuck. 

You whimpered in excitement as he slipped his fingers under the waistband of your bikini bottoms and finally — finally — slipped them over your legs. As his eyes settled on your messy, greedy cunt, you feared for a moment something was wrong with you. But before you could even voice this fear, Bucky purred approvingly, ‘Such a pretty pussy, princess. And you’re dripping wet.’ He dipped two fingers between your folds, trailing them over your cunt slowly. ‘Is all this for me?’

 ‘Y-yes, sir,’ you stammered, feeling yourself sink into his touch.

‘Lie back, sweetheart,’ he said, ‘I think I want a taste.’

You let yourself fall back, eyes fluttering as his fingers were replaced by his tongue. He lapped at your folds diligently, moaning as he wrapped his lips around your clit for a moment. You whimpered his name. 

‘You taste so sweet,’ he murmured against your warm cunt.

You felt his fingers teasing your entrance, making you lift your hips.

‘Is this the kind of things you imagine when you’re touching yourself, princess?’ he asked.

‘Yes, sir,’ you admitted in a moan.

‘Fucking shame.’ He licked your inner lips teasingly with only the tip of his tongue, ‘For you to always have to take care of yourself. But I’m here now. I’ll make you feel nice, sweetheart. But I just need to open you up a bit.’

You bit your lip as he slipped finger inside of you. It felt so much better than when you dipped your own fingers inside of you. So much better. His lips still on your folds, he started to slowly move the digit in and out of you.

‘Bucky,’ you sighed, grabbing a handful of his hair, ‘Please, I need more.’

‘Filthy, needy girl,’ he groaned, but he was quick to give into your demand.

You moaned completely content when he slipped a second finger inside of you, stretching you so nicely. He spread his fingers inside of you, dragging a whimper out of you.

‘So tight,’ he murmured, curling his fingers as he started to once again pulse them inside of you. ‘You can take another one, can’t you, princess?’

‘Y-yes, sir.’

Your body was heavy with pleasure and need when he added a third finger. As he started to fuck you with his fingers he wrapped his lips around your clit, teasing your sensitive nub with the tip of your tongue. You were squirming under him, your body desperately aching for more. More of his touch. More of him.

‘Bucky,’ you whined.

‘I know, sweetheart, I know.’

He placed his metal hand on your thigh, pressing your leg in the mattress in an attempt to keep you still. Your eyes were fluttering, as you tried to keep them open, but failed — warm waves dragging you deeper and deeper.

‘I think I’m gonna…’ You lost your words, the vowels falling away into moans and sighs.

‘I got you, sweetheart.’ He licked your folds, tongue flat. ‘Come for me, princess. Be a good girl and come for me.’

He set to sucking your clit again, fucking you with his fingers more roughly now. Like this it didn’t take long for you to fall apart in shivers and moans and curses. Grabbing at his hair and his name falling from your lips you came around him. He slipped his fingers out of you immediately, but his mouth was still on you, licking up your juices as he showered you in praise, ‘You did so well for me, princess. So well.’

You must have looked completely ruined, when he finally crawled up your body. Smiling hazily at him, you started to unbutton his shirt. Your gaze drifted lower, at his throbbing cock hanging out if his pants.

‘We could stop now,’ he offered, even though he had set to leaving kisses on your collarbone.

‘Take those pants off, Bucky,’ you said, slipping of his shirt. Fingertips eagerly skimming over his chest, you added, ‘And I already told you where you can find a condom.’

‘Goddamn, vixen,’ he hissed as he set to doing as he was told.

You looked at him with a grin as he cursed the endless black hole that was your purse. When he eventually found what you needed, you took it from him. He finally took of his pants completely as you opened the wrapping. Getting the condom on happened with a lot of giggling from your side and cursing from Bucky’s, but when he was all wrapped up, he was on you again immediately. Grabbing your thighs he settled between your legs. Your tongue sneaked along your lips as he placed the tip of his cock against your entrance. He pressed in just a bit. You held your breath.

‘You okay, sweetheart?’

You nodded, placing your hands on his thighs. ‘Please, sir, I need you inside me.’

He shoved into you, frustratingly slowly opening you up. You arched your back, instinctively shoving away a bit from him, but Bucky grabbed your waist, keeping you in place.

‘No, no, no,’ he groaned, ‘You can take it all, princess, I know you can.’

And he buried himself in completely. You had never been stretched like this before. It hurt just a bit, but the pain was drowned out by the thick, pulsing pleasure of your walls clenching around him.

‘That’s it,’ Bucky sighed, ‘Jesus, you’re so tight.’

He pulled back till only the tip of him was still in you. You whined, grabbing his shoulders, ‘Sir, please.’

He chuckled a bit, as he slid back inside of you, till his head hit your cervix. Your breath hitched as your mouth fell open in a soundless moan.

‘Oh, look at you, princess, cock drunk already?’

You only nodded. He repeated the motions, this time looking down at where your bodies were connected.

‘Fuck, your pussy swallows me so eagerly,’ he hissed and he started to rock into you with a steady pace. ‘I wanted to go slow, be considerate since it’s your first time, but I think you need it bad, don’t you?’

‘Yes, sir,’ you mumbled, pressing your nails in his shoulders.

‘Tell me what you need,’ he purred sweetly in your ear.

‘I - I need you to fuck me, Mr. Barnes,’ you stammered, looking at him pleadingly.

You tried to buck your hips, but his grip on your waist was — well, like iron.

‘Filthy girl,’ he groaned.

But he did finally thrust into you hard, not holding back anymore. You clang onto his shoulders, as you shattered into pieces of moans and curses and mutterings of his name. The drag of your walls along his cock was intoxicating you. At some point he let go of your waist, and rather sloppily you tried to meet his movements.

‘You really needed this badly, didn’t you, princess?’ He leaned over to start kissing your throat. ‘To be stretched out on a big, throbbing cock, to be fucked completely senseless.’

 ‘Yes.’ You dragged your nails over his back, causing him to groan. ‘I needed this terribly. You’re filling me up so nicely, sir.’

He set to sucking the spot where your neck met your shoulder. You couldn’t help but let a hand wander between your bodies, two fingers brushing over your clit. Bucky pressed his teeth in your skin, making you yelp.

‘Did I tell you you could do that?’ he hissed.

‘Please,’ you whined, ‘I — I can’t come otherwise.’

He pushed himself up again, still rocking into you, and took a hold of your wrist.

‘You want to come?’ he demanded to know.

Despite his dominant behaviour, his eyes fell shut for a moment, his lips parting, betraying that he was enjoying this just as much as you were. You lifted his hand to your face, ‘Please, sir. Haven’t I been good to you?’

You slipped his thumb in your mouth, sucking on the digit. His eyes went big for a moment, his pupils small, and he groaned, ‘Fuck, you little vixen.’

And you hummed happily as he slipped his thumb from your mouth and instead used it to rub your clit. A high, excited yelp escaped your mouth as he starting thrusting into you with short, hard thrusts, meanwhile still toying with you sensitive nub.

‘Is this what you wanted, sweetheart?’

‘Y-yes, sir. Thank you.’

You let your head hang, arching your back as you felt the pleasure inside you swell again.

‘Come around me, princess,’ he grunted, ‘Show me how good I make you feel.’

Your second orgasms hit you more abruptly than the first one, reducing you to a shivering mess. Bucky slipped out of you immediately, catching his breath, but wrapped his arms around you, cooing,

‘Good girl, just like that.’

You weren’t even fully recovered from your orgasm, as you flung yourself at him, pushing him on his back and kissing him sloppily. He laughed into the kiss, pushing you away, to ask, ‘Are you alright? I can finish…’

‘No,’ you interrupted him.

Hands flat on his chest, you straddled him, rubbing your sensitive cunt over his hard cock, that was throbbing against his abdomen. You grinned as you saw him shiver ever so lightly. He sighed, grabbing your waist, ‘Fine, you horny little girl, bounce on my cock then.’

Tummy twirling in excitement, you positioned him against your entrance. Your didn’t avert his eyes from his as you sank down on him, until he was filling you completely. Admittedly, your movements were clumsy, but he didn’t berate you. He looked rather amused as you tried and figured out what to do, but when you had found out how to grind your hips, he moaned your name.

‘Fuck, princess, such a sight. Riding my cock like a dirty whore,’ he rambled, completely drunk on you. ‘And why do you still have this on?’ 

He tugged at the bikini top that was still clanging onto your body, even though with the straps undone your breasts were exposed either way. He took the top of completely and prepped himself up a bit, so he could kiss your breasts. Holding onto his shoulders, you kept on bouncing on his cock, cherishing the stretch and the drag around your walls.

This time, as his fingers sneaked over your clit, it really didn’t take long for you to come again. You moaned and trembled on him, the orgasm washing over you, but as you tried to slip him out of you, he wrapped his arms around you keeping you in place. He let himself fall on his back, dragging you with him. Your breasts pressed against his chest, he just kept thrusting into you. Whimpering because of the overstimulation, you looked him in the eye only to be completely amazed by the hazy, drifting gaze in his blue irises.

‘You feel so good, princess, so fucking good. Fuck.’

His movements stilled and mouth agape you stared at him as he came. Trembling a bit he started to move his hips again, riding his orgasm out. When he finally fell motionless completely, you slipped off him. You felt strangely empty without his cock in you, and for a moment you regretted the condom. You’d loved to feel his seed inside of you. Lying down on your stomach you looked as Bucky sat up and took care of the condom, tying a knot in it as to keep his cum from leaking out of it.

He leaned over to place a kiss on your head, whispering, ‘Just a minute.’

You turned to lie on your back, and looked up at the ceiling for while. Trying to process this, only to figure out soon enough there wasn’t a lot to process. You’d just enjoyed yourself tremendously and you didn’t feel regret or shame or whatever.

‘You haven’t finished this.’ Bucky’s voice dragged you from your thoughts. You looked up at him, blinking in surprise.

You accepted your glass of wine and sat up again, back against the headrest. Bucky sat down on the mattress, his right hand trailing over your leg.

‘How do you feel?’

You took a sip of wine and pondered for a moment, ‘Very satisfied.’

A proud grin sneaked over his lips and you put your glass aside. You reached out for him and he crawled on the bed with you, taking you in his arms.

‘You can stay the night, if you want,’ you told him, sliding a finger over his jaw.

‘I probably should warn you,’ he said, ‘that if I stay I might try to wake you by slipping my fingers between your legs.’

‘I only had one condom, Bucky.’

‘You looked very pretty when chocking on my cock, princess,’ he said and you laughed. He kissed your shoulder and added, ‘You think we could schedule those three dates, though?’

You raised an eyebrow. You hadn’t really expected him to want to make this a more regular thing. To want to try out the whole dating thing.

‘You sure you want to go that direction, Bucky?’ you asked him, immediately adding, ‘Not that I wouldn’t want to. I’d love to, but — I don’t want to pressure you into anything you don’t want to. You don’t owe me a thing.’

You felt nervous enough to throw up when you met Bucky at the exposition - this date, regardless of a favourable outcome or not, would change the course of your relationship with him forever.

“Hey Buck.” You caught his attention, having spotted his dapper uniform from a mile away. His reaction to your dress brought that familiar heat to your cheeks, and you let out a relieved giggle as he took you in.

“Wow.” Bucky exhaled, his mouth hanging slightly open as his eyes travelled up and down your frame, spending ever so slightly more time on the curves of your waist on the way down and your chest on the way back up. “Doll, you look… just wow.” Confidence surged in your chest at how you had rendered the most gorgeous man you had ever laid eyes on essentially speechless.

“You’re looking very dashing, Buck.” A rosiness developed on the tops of his cheekbones as he thanked you, nervously smoothing the material of his suit down his chest and adjusting his hat.

“Nothing compares to-”

“Bucky!” A familiar feminine voice called from behind you, and Bucky’s signature charming smile bloomed on his features. Turning and following his gaze, you saw the wide doe eyes, elegantly styled hair and perfect toothy smile of Connie Coleman.

It felt as though a heavy stone had plunged through the pit of your stomach.

You hadn’t seen Connie since the day you, Bucky and Steve graduated from high school. Suddenly, all the moments where Bucky remarked how stunning she was and pined after her attention were all you could remember of your high school experience. And though she had never done anything to you personally for you to feel animosity towards her, there was currently a specific scorching jealousy burning a hole in your chest you hadn’t felt since you were eighteen.

However, that flaming jealousy quickly transitioned to a hollow despair at the bottom of your stomach as you watched them reunite. Connie leaned in, giving Bucky a sweet kiss to the cheek and saddled up beside him, interlocking her arm with his as if she wasn’t just saying hello in passing, but had also been invited on the date.

“Connie… hi.” You attempted to keep your composure, though you were fairly sure your disappointment was evident not only in your tone but in the dismayed expression Steve always told you you were terrible at concealing.

“Oh, hi… you.” Connie started, but it was clear in the years since high school she had completely forgotten your name. “How have you been?” She asked with an artificial smile and an overly exaggerated cheerful tone, tightening her hold on Bucky further.

“Fine, Connie. Just fine.” Quietly muttering the last part, you encircled your arms around yourself to provide some comfort, solace which you wished you could find instead in Bucky’s arms. A chill ran down your spine as you awkwardly stood hugging yourself as Bucky conversed with Connie, seemingly in their own little world.

“Here we go, four tickets to the expo.” Steve’s voice broke you out of your tormenting thoughts. Though you also hadn’t expected him to be here, he was a much more welcome intrusion than Connie had been. “It’s starting soon, we should make our way inside.”

“Steve, you remember Connie?” Bucky asked hopefully. Steve gave a tight smile and a shy nod of recognition. After a moment of awkward pause, where Bucky took the opportunity to flash you a sweet, encouraging smile, you all entered the expo together.

Bucky and Connie stayed close to Steve and yourself throughout Howard Stark’s demonstration but once his segment concluded, and you watched the way Bucky whispered closely into Connie’s ear so she could hear him over the noise of the crowd, you knew you had seen enough and wanted to be literally anywhere else in New York at that moment.

“Wanna sneak away and grab ice cream?” You whispered to Steve whose eyes lit up with excitement. Crowds tended to make him uncomfortable and you could tell by the way he hadn’t left your side since stepping foot in the exposition that he was feeling particularly nervous tonight.

As the mob of people herded towards the next exhibit, Bucky and Connie lost in the swarm, you and Steve hung back and managed to slip away out the gate you entered through and onto the street. His favourite ice cream parlour in Brooklyn not even a block away.

It really was a lovely night with Steve, he was always much more open and talkative when he was one on one with someone rather than in a group. But no matter the topic of discussion, nor the size of the sundae he ordered for you to share, could distract you from the thought that Bucky was currently having the time of his life with Connie.

Once you had finished off the sundae, and aired out your grievances about Bucky leading you on to the only other person who knew about your affection for him, you decided to call it a night and to make your way home. Stepping out into the cool night air, laughing at a remark Steve had made, someone called out from you down the street which soured your mood.

“Do you know how long I’ve been looking for you?” Bucky puffed slightly out of breath when he finally reached you, though what captured your attention most was that Connie was nowhere in sight.

There was a tinge of satisfaction in your chest that at a minimum the date hadn’t ended with her in his bed, but your overwhelming feeling towards Bucky was still bitter resentment.

“Stevie, can you walk me home?” You asked, trying your best to ignore how dashingly handsome Bucky looked in his uniform and the intense disheartened look in his eye at your refusal to acknowledge him.

Bucky placed a firm hand on Steve’s shoulder to stop him from walking off with you.

“Steve please, let me walk with her.” After a moment where a knowing look passed between them, Steve gave a silent nod of approval. This was met with an eye roll, a humph, and an abrupt, curt turn as you took off quickly down the dimly lit street in the opposite direction to where Bucky came from.

“Doll, wait up.” Bucky called after you, but your response was to pick up the pace of your steps as you heard his own start at a jog.

“Don’t ‘doll’ me, James.” You commented exasperatedly over your shoulder.

You rounded a corner into the adjoining street and even though you knew it would do nothing to deter Bucky from chasing you, it did allow you a couple seconds to wipe away the errant tears trickling down your cheeks without his notice.

“Would you please just stop and let me explain.” He reached for your hand but you forced yourself to pull away from his touch. Regardless of how much you craved his consistently comforting contact, you were upset at him for leading you on - or perhaps more so at yourself for believing you actually stood a chance with him.

“Barnes, I really don't wanna hear it. Silly me didn’t realise you were setting me up with Steve so he didn’t feel left out while you went on your date. Foolishly I got my hopes up thinking this date was really meant to be for us.” You couldn’t meet his gaze directly as embarrassment settled in your stomach, but in doing so you missed the pure guilt which completely filled his eyes.

“No, you’ve mis-” Bucky began, but you sharply interrupted him.

“I know it’s my own fault for deluding myself into thinking you were actually interested in me James, but please don’t make me feel stupid for it.” You asserted with a slight crack in your voice. Turning away from him, knowing the tears brimming in your eyes would betray you if you continued to look at him any longer, you tried to stalk away but Bucky’s firm grip on your wrist prevented that from happening.

“I know you don’t want to hear excuses, but please let me explain.” His grip wouldn’t budge, not tight enough to cause you any hurt, but to keep you from walking away again. “The date was meant to be for us. Connie was who I invited as Steve’s date.” These words, and the desperation in which he said them with, made you pause, though you were still sceptical given Connie’s closeness to Bucky all night.

“You looked pretty cozy with her given she wasn’t your date.” You argued, but you finally took the opportunity to look him in the eye and noticed the self-blame and regret stirring in his eyes.

“She misunderstood when I asked her to come out with us on a group date, she thought I was asking her to be my date.” There was no deception you could perceive in his words, and if sensing you were convinced enough that you weren’t going to run off again, he let go of your wrist. “She was rather embarrassed when I told her I wasn’t interested.”

“But I saw you together, you didn’t exactly do anything to reject her proximity earlier tonight.” You wrung your hands nervously as you spoke, and it looked like it physically pained Bucky to not reach out and steady them for you.

“I didn’t want to be rude or leave her out, not when she was going out with three people she hadn’t seen since high school and who have all remained good friends.” He sighed, shaking his head as if to curse silently at himself. “I am sorry I didn’t realise sooner, that was my mistake I wish I could take back, but I can’t.”

The street lamp above was bright enough to illuminate Bucky’s entire face, the sorrow and remorse clear as day in his expression as he gazed at you. Though there was still a small part of you annoyed at how he had handled the night's events, mostly you wished to pull him into a tight, consoling hug.

“Doll, I know it might be hard to believe right now, but I genuinely wanted to take you on a date tonight. I wanted to laugh with you at the expo and show you all those amazing exhibits we wouldn’t get to see anywhere else. I wanted to take you dancing afterwards, pull your body as close to mine as possible and just hold you for the first time in my life.” The conviction behind his words had your eyes prickling with tears - that was what you had been hoping for tonight as well.

“There has been nothing I’ve wanted more in my life than I want you, doll. Nothing. And now I fear I have messed up my chances with you beyond repair.” You held your hands out and let him take them as he had done the day he first asked you out. The feeling of his warm skin against yours elicited goosebumps up your arms.

“Bucky, you have not irreparably ruined anything. I have loved you since when we were in high school together, one misunderstanding isn’t going to change the way I feel about you.” You confessed, and the joyous smile he beamed at you made your heart flutter.

Bucky brought your hands up and hooked them around his neck before settling his own on your waist.

“I love you too, doll.” That cheeky grin which made your cheeks heat up had tugged its way back onto his lips as he leaned down and kissed you for the first time. His lips were surprisingly soft, melding into yours perfectly, his hands snaking around to the small of your back and pressing you ever closer to him.

“I promise, next weekend I’ll take you on an amazing second first date.” He pledged before kissing you again. “This time, it’ll be just us.”

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