i wanna feel the bomb drop, earth stop

yo I haven't been on here in 5ever, who's some good peeps to follow

Posted something last night and to be honest it helped a lot so I figured I'd give it another go. I'm not the type of person who gets emotional and when I do I'm definitely the type who internalizes it all. It's hard to talk about this stuff with people, especially people around who just don't care at the same level as you. It's frustrating. Never in my life have I felt such a wide range of emotions over the course of a couple days, hell over the course of a day, really in a single hour I can go from just irritable, to completely fine, to pissed off, to incredible sad. It's a hard thing to deal with and it sucks feeling alone in it too, which is the other reason I wanted to post something. I talked to a few people last night and it helped me, hope it helped them. It's nice to know other people feel the same way you do. I guess as young people there isn't the same level of emotions from our peers, there isn't the same grief, again, maybe it's that in our of state, but I'm sure there's plenty of you out of state too. I know personally I went through all today pretending to be fine because honestly I feel like people would think me acting like I'm not is fake in a way and that's the last thing I want. When something happens I tell people and it's just like an interesting fact they can say "I know I heard" to the next person who tells them. Still feels like people just don't get it. Like they think it just sucks, they're not seeing it as an act of terror, just a bad event. It's much more than how anyone around me is acting. Actually the only one to mention it in any of my classes was a little Chinese professor, and nobody in the class cared, at all. Wishing I was home where I know everyone probably cares much more than this and this just sucks. The fact that there are still bomb threats being called in is terrifying to me. I know they're all nothing but that's not what it's about. What it's about is that the city of Boston is honestly in this just state of terror. It's in the same state the country was in after 9/11 and that's what's scary. I don't even think anything else is going to happen, just the feeling coming from within the city is what's scary to me. I do think the Bruins helped to lift up the city tonight, despite the loss. Just the video, the anthem before the game, everything. The "we are Boston" chants throughout the game it's all just awesome. I'm proud to from a place that stands up and cheers for the great people of the city, the team they love, and the city they love in the face of everything. What happened in that building was the first step to moving past all of this and I'm proud of the whole Bruins team and organization tonight. Please feel free to talk to me if you need someone to just vent to or talk to.

The fact that what happened in Boston yesterday has become something people just posted about for a day on social media is sort of surreal to me. I don't think any of the sentiment is false or anything but the fact is I'm still living this and it seems like everyone around me is past it and it sucks. Maybe it's because I'm at school out of state but it seems like to everyone around me it's just one of those things that people know is sad, and they think it's sad but rather than being sad they just say "oh that's so sad" and then post some generic "pray for Boston" thing on their twitters or face books or whatever, like a few things and then go on with their lives. To me it's just nothing like that. It's something that I can't get out of the pit of my stomach and it's only getting worse. I slept fine last night, tonight I can't sleep. And it's not the new information it's not the specifics of the people affected its it as a whole. This is Boston we're talking about. It's home. And I don't live in Boston I'm 30 mins south but I dare anyone to tell me it's not home. I'm part of that city and that city is ingrained in me. Boston isn't just a city, it's a feeling, it's an attitude. It's so much more than can even be put into words. And yesterday should have been the one day of the year that captures that more than any other. The best day of the year in that city, but it was taken from us and for me that's hard to get past. Out of all the fucked up shit you see you don't see it happening in the streets you've walked. At events you've gone to year after year. You don't have stories about how you've been in that spot at that exact time last year or the year before. Having it happen in your own backyard where you inevitably had at least one person you know makes it so much harder. This is never something I thought I would have to deal with and even from the moment it did happen I never thought it would be this difficult to deal with. I do know I'll get past it and the reason I know that is because I do have the city of Boston in my blood. "Boston is a strong and resilient city and so are it's people" ya damn right about that Obama.

Yesterday motherfuckers tryna shoot up my school, today motherfuckers tryna bomb my country. Dayummm cut a homie some slack

Via NHL PR: In Jagr’s home debuts with his six teams he has six goals, six assists, three game winning goals and his teams are 6-0-0. Nutso.