move the earthquakes out of me

again.

redrew a piece from 2021

The overwhelming response was, while well-meaning, sorely disappointing and along the lines of "of course trans women are women, 'woman' is ultimately a meaningless category, you can be whatever you like".

It was such a profoundly sobering experience because I realized that most people have framed their conception of trans rights around owning bigots and dunking on them in arguments instead of an affirmative understanding of trans marginalization, a comprehension of the struggles we face in a cissexist, patriarchal society, or even a basic familiarity with how we are seen and regarded and treated institutionally.

'Woman' is not a meaningless category in a patriarchy. It is a positionality, one that trans women undoubtedly occupy, and most cis people--even allies, even the ones who believe they want to do right by us--do not fundamentally accept the premise that we actually inhabit this position and navigate society as women.

It's an epistemic chasm I don't quite know how to cross, which is unfortunate as I've inadvertently dedicated my life to doing so. Ascertaining just how wide that gap in understanding is was alarming, if necessary.

But I also like it fine because I feel 100% certain that Edward Elric would not have children unless he was 100% certain that he wanted them and was ready to be a good dad. He would not bring life into this world recklessly. I feel like he would have asked himself, "Is there any chance I might be a deadbeat dad?" and that he was absolutely ruthless with his analysis of his character, like, to the degree that it quickly stopped being funny or embarrassing and started being sad. He'd try and get his own Riza Hawkeye about this: "If it ever looks like I'm being a shitty father or husband, I need you to kill me," he says, sleep-deprived and panicking, and Alphonse can only be like, "Brother... No..."

Also, I feel like we shouldn't leave Winry out of this. This woman is driven and successful and was orphaned because her parents left her for a good cause. She and Ed would sit their asses down and have an excruciatingly thorough and detailed conversation about parenthood and their future. I could buy an AU where they mutually decided to be childfree, sure, but I cannot be fully convinced that they as a team would be reckless about children and parenthood.