"Only way to fuck it up is to be boring!"

We've been aware of the fact that we're a system for a little bit over eight months now (realized it a few days before new year's eve last year) but things don't really feel THAT much clearer compared to that time period.

We're not even fully sure if we truly have a headspace and if yes then it's really hazy, we don't know whether or not half of the alters we've documented are dormant or not since they haven't fronted in a long time, we don't really have a gatekeeper to push people in and/or out of front, we don't have that much communication going on aside from notes.

It's just frustrating since we've seen a lot of people be more "in the know" if that wording makes sense faster than us.

Dare I say it feels like i have a worse grasp on everything than I did during the first syscovery days

I'm also worried about guys who haven't contacted in a while. But it feels like if I were to write them as dormant it would be like completely giving up on them.

Back then (mostly since there were only three of us) we could easily tell who was in front, nowadays we're a blurry soup of people almost constantly

Please check on your system protector(s)! They get burnt out and stressed too! My headmates didn't check up on me, and it led to me getting intense anxiety and my mental health declining. So please, don't reduce protectors to their role. We are living beings. We have feelings and emotions.