insomniac olympics

I want you to bite my lip until I can no longer speak, and then suck my ex-girlfriends name out of my mouth just to make sure she never comes up in our conversations. I want you to come to me like an afternoon. Come to me slowly as if you were a broken sunset with a lazy sky on your shoulders. If you let me be your sunlight, I promise that I will penetrate your darkness until you speak in angel wings. Pull me close to you. Tell me that you love me and then scratch your future into my back so I could be everything that you live for. I promise that I will die for you daily and then resurrect in your screams. I promise that I will love you. I promise that I will love you as if it’s the only thing that I’ve ever done correctly.

Learn to put on your bracelets and zip up your dresses by yourself. There will be times when you will be alone. Get on a long plane ride. Look out the window. Understand the immensity of our world. Understand your insignificance. Understand your absolute importance. Press the send button. If you don’t say it now, you never will. Do not sneer at happiness or roll your eyes at sadness. Be aware that apathy is not healthy. You are more than the amount of people who want to have sex with you. That pit in your stomach when he doesn’t text you back, it shouldn’t be there. No one should be able to control you like that. Shopping is cathartic. Buy the shoes and deal with one-ply toilet paper for a while. It will get better, but it will never be perfect. Learn to live through the small moments of happiness. When they disappear, remember they will resurface. I promise that cookie will not change anything (except that it will make you smile). Please, please, take care of yourself. You are everything to somebody. You are everything to your self. That alone is enough.