"...but still, like air, i'll rise"

Since childhood, we’re taught to share our new toys, sugary treats and whatnot; in that respect, doing such is probably for the best. However after tried years of this self-sacrificing practice (it was never easy for me to share sugary treats), it is totally safe to say that there is now officially a fat line between being selfish and not being selfish enough.

The word “selfish” has a bad stigma. How can it not when it’s associated with words like greedy, inconsiderate, egotistical etc. I remember being a teenager, the prime of my dating career, and suppressing my feelings for B just for the sake of not hurting A’s feelings. Well, that would only work for the first couple of weeks before I’d go rogue and either leave A for B or try to sustain relationships with both A and B or just drop them both for C (O HaaAaaaay!! ..joke). Now you might say to me, Jane why couldn’t you just be honest with A? Well, I wasn’t that evolved as a teenager and frankly I was too much of a coward to be honest because in the end it still led back to square one: hurting someone’s feelings.

Advice to my future daughter, It is okay to hurt someone’s feelings.

In the end of it all, there’s an inevitable outcome to every story. As individuals, we are going to do what we want no matter what. (Pause for guilt) HOW SELFISH. HOW FUCKING SELFISH. YOU DON’T DESERVE HAPPINESS YOU GREEDY SON OF A BITCH. The intensity of those few sentences, hence the caps, represent the little voice in my head that once praised me for sharing my toys and treats. (Resume to reality)

In this life, you will always either be the good person or the bad person. As much as we try to always be the good person, the truth is it’s our natural duty as human beings to serve both roles at different times of our lives. As awful as it might be to be the bearer of pain, you’re challenging someone to be a better person while challenging yourself to be true to who you are; which is a challenge that is much more difficult than what you might think.

To love is to be selfless. To have self-love is to be selfish. Find your balance..