koal's firepit

This is the Caitlyn she knows. Not the puppet dictator, not the vengeful daughter, not even the suave girl who leaned against the wall and told her she's predictable a mere few seconds ago. This, the dorky, awkward, nervous Caitlyn is the one she first fell for, the one she first met. And yeah, Caitlyn is complex and can be dark and she's not the same, maybe she never was. But that part of her, the part that stuttered at Vi's flirting in the brothel, the part that tried to offer herself up to the Firelights in her place then sputtered in disbelief at Vi's appearance, the part that earned the name Cupcake, that part is real. Maybe it's tarnished, maybe it's changed, but it's still a part of her. And Vi had missed it desperately.

She even slips up in the previous episode, when Holly is scared and Max encourages her by saying fear is a good sign, promising, "It means you're almost home." Holly calls her on this, replying, "You said I'm almost home. But you're coming too, right?" And Max brushes it off with a joke before reassuring Holly that she's going with her. And sure, maybe Max thought once they reached the red area (I think it's called the Mind Lair? so I'm gonna go with that) through Holly's memories, she could find a way to open her own portal, but that wasn't a guarantee. But what she did know was that walking through Holly's memories would open a portal for Holly, just like how walking through Max's memories opened a portal for Max. Max's plan was always to get Holly out, which is why she never bothered telling her they needed separate portals; she assumed they would find Holly's first.

And when that doesn't happen, when Max is the first one presented with escape, she doesn't take it. Not until Holly has a way out, too. The scene isn't set up great, which is why I think so many people get the impression that Max is abandoning Holly in favor of her own freedom, but she never says or even implies that she's leaving Holly before Holly can get her portal to appear.

When Max said Holly couldn't come with her, that she had to open her own portal, she means just that. She's saying she can't create the portal for Holly, it's something only Holly can do for herself. And they're already in the Mind Lair, the final stage for anyone trying to escape. It's not an area exclusive to Max; it's not like Max led Holly somewhere where only she could escape and Holly couldn't. They got there through Henry's memory, a place neutral to them both. Holly doesn't have to walk back through her memories alone or go on a journey to another location. She's exactly where she needs to be, she's as far as she and Max can go together. Holly needs to do this part on her own, but Max never planned on leaving until Holly's portal appeared, which is only reinforced by how goddamn long she spent talking to Holly after her own portal opened. (Don't get me wrong, I liked the actual speech and I love Big Sister Max™ but it was awful scene placement).

Despite having horrendous pacing, the scene at least demonstrates that Max was not going to leave until Holly had a way out.

Max Mayfield is one of the most selfless characters. She befriended El when she came to her for advice in S3 despite being brushed off in S2. She listened to Lucas's basketball game on the radio even though she couldn't bring herself to go in person. She offered herself as bait in S4, willingly subjecting herself to personal hell to buy the others time. She charged Vecna with a stick when he threw El across the room during the piggyback. Max has never had anyone in her family to rely on; her friends have become her family and she's willing to protect them with her life. She has protected them with her life. And despite it all, despite being alone for two years, she's prepared to do it all again.

Hi! Forgive me for the super late response. Also forgive me if I am misunderstanding your prompt, but in terms of Vi's feelings in the aftermath about being away from Caitlyn during their separation between Acts 1 and 2, I think Vi obviously feels a lot of guilt. Caitlyn wouldn't want Vi to feel guilty, Caitlyn herself feels incredibly guilty for their split. Still, I don't think it stops Vi from feeling bad about it. She would have wanted to be there for Caitlyn and regrets that she wasn't. Yes, Caitlyn pushed her away; yes, the blame is mostly on Caitlyn for the way that they parted; still, Vi is a character who cares so deeply about her loved ones.

I don't think Vi feels any guilt over telling Caitlyn to find a way to call off the invasion. Ambessa was pushing for the full invasion and Caitlyn's strike team idea was a hindrance to her plans, which was good. The Grey may not have been the best way to handle it because even though they only targeted the chem-barons, it's hard to control a gaseous weapon. I'm not saying they were justified in using it by any means, I'm also not saying they were carelessly gassing all the civilians either; it's a layered moral subject that I won't get into other than to say I think it is more compelling the more complex it is.

Back to the topic at hand, I think after the finale Vi sees how much weight and guilt Caitlyn carries. She sees all the ways Caitlyn throws herself into her work, the habits she seems to have formed, and wonders with a heavy heart how she's gotten used to shouldering everything on her own. She sees how hard Caitlyn works to right her wrongs from her six months as the Commander. She watches her fall asleep at her desk countless times, pen in hand, ink smeared on her face from the papers resting under her cheek, and feels something tug at her chest. Because as she drapes a blanket over Caitlyn's shoulders, as she lifts her into her arms to tuck her into bed, she wonders how many nights Caitlyn had fallen asleep like this while they were apart. How many times she jolted herself awake in her chair because no one was there to care for her, how many times she tried to rub the sleep from her eyes and continue her work because no one was there to stop her. She wonders how many times Caitlyn ran herself into the ground, cut herself on her own jagged edges, and picked the pieces of herself back up alone.

At some point she had heard about the coronation, the way Ambessa called Caitlyn forward in front of everybody, and Vi's blood boils just thinking about it. Vi knows Caitlyn has always been burdened by power, and when called upon in front of everyone to bear that responsibility, to bear the weight of the cape, of course Caitlyn would say yes. She felt like it was her duty; her duty as a daughter to avenge her mother, her duty as a Kiramman to protect her city. She didn't take the shot. She didn't take the shot and the world imploded. And so, to Caitlyn, she was the one who had to put it back together by any means necessary. Her sense of duty, it's what blinded her, drowned her like a stone tied to her ankles.

It's a cycle Vi finds continues even now. Caitlyn wore the cape, so Caitlyn must be the one to fix it. This sense of responsibility is so different from what Vi has seen from most topsiders, it's part of why Vi fell for her in the first place, because Caitlyn is just and empathetic and cares. But it's also something that can be self-destructive, especially when she starts punishing herself for her shortcomings. But now, Vi is always there to remind her that she can't, and shouldn't, bear the world on her shoulders. And Caitlyn fulfills that same role for Vi.

Hi! I'll preface by saying I'm not a league player so while I know general lore, most of this will be my personal take and headcanons to fit what I know of where Vi and Caitlyn up in the game.

Vi as a character has always been driven by her loved ones and her need to protect. It's both her greatest strength and her fatal flaw. And I think initially this may be what causes her to re-enter a system she has always stood against. Caitlyn doesn't ask Vi to put the badge on again, would never ask that of her. In fact, I don't think Caitlyn herself wants to go back to the enforcers at first, what with all the guilt from her time as the Commander. She doesn't trust herself to hold that power, and even if she did, she would make sure Vi is okay with her joining before doing anything. And she wouldn't ask Vi in the first place because she'd never want to put Vi in that position, so she would never go back even if she wanted to. I think it's imperative that Vi approaches Caitlyn about it, decides for herself that this is something she wants to do. That's the only way either of them goes back.

Caitlyn is probably talking about some document or other that's made its way onto her desk amongst the numerous piles of papers, detailing how the council is trying to decide what to do with the enforcers. She isn't in the council, but she is still heavily involved in the relief efforts for both Piltover and Zaun. She mentions reading the council's proposed reforms, how she's weary to trust anyone to execute the overhaul properly, and how she thinks they might be better off abolishing the enforcers as a whole and rebuilding from the ground up.

And Vi just knows. Knows that whoever the council picks will never measure up. Knows that she can't stand to watch another generation of kids grow up in fear of those who are supposed to protect them. Knows that she doesn't trust anyone else with this but Caitlyn.

Caitlyn, and maybe herself.

She tells Caitlyn as much. And Caitlyn hesitates, says she shouldn't hold that kind of power again. Refuses to cause any more hurt than she already has, wonders how Vi can still place her trust in her after everything, especially with this.

And Vi just takes Caitlyn's face in her hands and tells her she trusts her because she knows her. Promises she won't do it alone this time, promises "together" and—

And well, Caitlyn has never been able to say no to Vi.

Neither of them are naive enough to think it will be a quick or easy process. Caitlyn is there to make the enforcers better. Vi is there to keep them from getting worse.

Caitlyn creates new policies, roots out corruption, sets the example as sheriff. Vi ensures that that example is followed. She's boots on the ground, leading the enforcers with an iron fist and greeting Zaunites with a gentle heart. Setting her own example even if she doesn't realize it.

Vi couldn't care less about the enforcers. She cares about Caitlyn and she cares about Zaun. Wearing the badge lets her keep other enforcers in check without being framed as an instigator and arrested immediately. She can keep a watchful eye, ensure that at least while she's around, the enforcers won't abuse their power in the name of the law. It might seem small or trivial, one person against dozens, but I don't think Vi has ever been an aerial view kind of person. She can't just trust that the enforcers are getting better, even if there are less incident reports and less arrests being made. She has to witness the change herself, has to look into the face of each and every person she encounters while wearing the badge and see to it that they are not mistreated. She needs them to see a friendly face. And even if some call her a traitor, a deserter, she takes it all in stride. If the price she pays for keeping an enforcer's baton from striking innocent flesh is petty names and the mocking lilt of "lapdog," then she'll shoulder that title gladly.

She wants better for the children of Zaun, better than what she had. That's always been the core of her character, to give to others what she never got. It's even vocalized by her in the first act of season one. She doesn't want kids to grow up without parents, taken by the very people who are supposed to protect. She doesn't want them to feel like they have no one to turn to, no one on their side. She doesn't want them to feel lesser. She wants them to see her and know that as long as she's there, no one will hurt them. And maybe, in the future, it won't just be her and Caitlyn they can go to. Maybe the number of friendly faces can grow.

With Caitlyn spearheading change at the top level, I think Vi believes one day they can achieve that. But it takes a long time for water to trickle from a river to the ocean, and so while they wait for that day to come, Vi will be there to make sure the well doesn't dry up.

Vi, who is haunted by the sight of her family's lifeless eyes, who can hear their screams with terrifying clarity, plagued by the same memories over and over. Caitlyn, who is haunted by the paintings of her own mind, who imagines endless versions of her loved ones' last moments because she'll never know, plagued by different horrors over and over.

Vi, who is terrified any time she and Caitlyn fight alongside one another, who feels her blood freeze with every second Caitlyn is in combat because not again.

Caitlyn, who is terrified any time she and Vi are separated, who feels her stomach drop with every second Vi isn't in her line of sight because not again.

Caitlyn, who has always been burdened by the future. Vi, who has always been haunted by the past.

Caitlyn, who when left alone, hides under a cloak too heavy for one person's shoulders. Vi, who when left alone, hides under face paint too dark for one person's skin.

Caitlyn, with nothing left to turn to, embracing what the world expects her to be: ruthless, heartless, privileged. A Kiramman. Vi, with nothing left to turn to, embracing what the world expects her to be: violent, dangerous, animalistic. A trencher.

Caitlyn, who loathes herself, because who she wants to be and who she needs to be are two different people. Vi, who loathes herself, because who she wants to be and who she needs to be are two different people.

We only see Caitlyn cry in the first episode of this season, when she breaks in Vi's arms. She's had to hide her emotions so much, evidenced especially in the intro where she appears to be stepping onto a stage. We see her take a deep breath, steel herself, before she slips on her mask. Her eyebrows lift, she flashes a fake smile, tries to look every bit the composed Kiramman she's expected to be even while she's dying inside. (Also if you look closely, for a split second it looks like you can see the outline of her scar across her left eye, perhaps foreshadowing?)

There's just something poetic about Caitlyn bottling her emotions until she bleeds, how she isn't allowed to cry until her tears turn to blood.

Episode 1 - Starts with a historic tragedy in a city (the bridge for Zaun, the council bombing for Piltover) and showing the devastating loss of a parent as consequence

Episode 2 - After being focused on the characters in the original setting, we shift focus to the sister city and it's inhabitants

Episode 3 - Vi loses everyone she loves and is left alone. Someone hitting their loved one in the heat of the moment (Vi hitting Powder, Caitlyn hitting Vi). At the end we see a change in authority, the rise of a new, darker leader for the cities (Silco for Zaun, Caitlyn for Piltover) and the beginning of the villain arc for a blue-haired character (Powder/Jinx in S1, Caitlyn in S2)

Episode 4 - Vi is not shown at all during the episode (except at the very end for S1). Jinx ventures topside to wreak havoc

Episode 5 - Vi has to learn how to work with someone she perceives as an enemy (Caitlyn in S1, Jinx in S2)

Episode 6 - Caitlyn and Vi begin to trust (or learn how to again) each other. Vi returns to her childhood home (taken there by Caitlyn after being stabbed in S1, shown kneeling by the same pillar used to mark her and Jinx's heights in S2). By the end of the episode, things look promising (Vi finding Jinx in S1, the family being together in S2) only for everything to be torn away (Jinx seeing Cait and losing it before the Firelights separate them, Jayce-although I understand why now-killing Viktor and triggering the collapse and Isha sacrificing herself). Also Caitlyn supporting Vi's weight after she's been injured.

Episode 7 - Ekko finally makes a reappearance after being gone for all of Act II, Ekko and Jinx centered, Ekko seeing a glimpse of Powder before losing her again, painful all around but beautifully done

Episode 8 - Vi and Caitlyn have a moment (break up in S1, sex™ in S2), someone pleading for a cause in the council room (Vi for Piltover's support against Silco, Jayce for Zaun's support against Viktor), Jinx solidifying her hate for Caitlyn in S1 with her shimmer hallucinations vs giving Vi her blessing to be with her in S2. Also Caitlyn is naked in both episodes just saying (shower scene in S1 and the™ scene in S2)

Episode 9 - Vi loses her sister, but she isn't truly lost (she becomes Jinx in S1 but we see in later episodes that she can still be good, she dies in S2 but we see at the end that she probably escaped through the air ducts), Caitlyn's life is changed forever because of what she chose to do in the season (losing her mom in S1 because she chose to investigate deeper, losing her eye in S2 because she let herself be manipulated by Ambessa). Jayce and Viktor's fates are left to speculation again (did they survive the explosion in S1, where are they or did they die in S2). Jinx ends up alone again, but instead of killing someone she loved (Silco), she saved someone she loved (Vi). She also saves Vi in both finales by killing her father (Silco, who was going to shoot Vi, and Vander who was going to shred her to pieces). The S2 ending is happier than S1 but it doesn't necessarily feel good, still bittersweet and melancholy. Caitlyn and Vi leaning on each other (out of necessity in S1 and out of love in S2) as their last appearances of the season

I feel like Cait is talking about the responsibility now thrust upon her. She's lost her mother and now while she's battling her grief, everyone is looking to her for answers, to fill her mother's shoes. Especially since this scene comes right after Caitlyn says, "None of this is on our terms," and Vi tells her that "Maybe you should change that," and she shouts, "I don't know how, okay?" Her dad gave her the Kiramman key, told her it's her legacy. Everyone turns to her as if she's the new councilor in all but title, like Cassandra hasn't only been gone for a mere couple of days, if that. They look to her for answers she doesn't have, to make the right decisions while she's stricken with grief as if she's supposed to be level-headed and fair when she's at the lowest point in her life.

Whereas I feel like Vi is talking about the emotional hole, the loss of someone you love and feeling the absence of their presence. Vi thinks Caitlyn is struggling with her grief, and she is by all accounts, but she has this added pressure that's suffocating her. She feels like she can't grieve, she can't show weakness, because everyone is counting on her. She can't even let herself feel the hole that Vi is talking about, because she is expected to fill the hole that Cassandra has left in Piltover, not the hole she feels in herself.

Don't get me wrong, I adore the scene and I think it's so sweet, but I feel like this could possibly be where Caitlyn and Vi, even if subconsciously, start not seeing eye to eye. Caitlyn doesn't have time to grieve, she has to try to prevent a war from happening, she has to shove it all down (the part in the intro where she sighs before stepping forward and putting on a smile for an invisible crowd kills me). Vi was in prison, trapped with her guilt and nothing to focus on but the soul crushing loss she suffered. She was locked in her own grief for years with nothing to do but drown in it, whereas Caitlyn is dying of thirst. Both are horrible fates, one isn't worse than the other, but their struggles and their ways of dealing with grief are different