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$LAYYYTER
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@chamomile-yellow
your portrayal of mpreg jesus is seriously laughable. you really think he would suddenly start developing seahorse mannerisms as early as in the first trimester? give me a break. everyone knows you're just projecting because youre a furry. can't wait to read the next chapter though! :)
Congratulations! this is the funniest ask I’ve ever received. Please don’t tell me what seahorse mannerisms are
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Are You Still gay?
yeah my contract actually just got extended
going to the grocery store when youre 20 makes your receipt look like this:
item 1 1.94
item 2 1.94
item 3 0.50
item 4 0.32
item 5 1.00
item 6 1.00
item 7 0.72
item 8 0.69
item 9 2.00
item 10 5.87
item 11 1.00
item 12 1.36
subtotal: 18.34
and you think about the $5 one for the rest of the day
Cooking Personality Test - the recipe you’re making calls for six ounces of tomato paste, but you can only get tomato paste in 5.5oz cans. You:
Crack open a second can and skim 10% off the top
Use one can and adjust the proportions of everything else accordingly
Use one can and don’t adjust the rest because it’s really not that critical
Find the least common multiple between 5.5 and 6 and make eleven batches at once
Give up and order pizza
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I was v confused when they smushed the leaves, but then about halfway thru the q tips it started coming back together
Witchcraft…
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colllection
I hope everyone is having a fucking day
Are there gay bugs?
he performed this when he came to my school and that shit was funny as fuck especially because a lot of the audience was LGBT ppl and we like Got It he’s so ridiculous
He’s also the guy who uses his twitter verification to pose as people and tweet ridiculous shit ie.
Iconic
whats agriculture
THIS
I showed this to my boyfriend and he sprinted to the cupboard and pulled this out
Wild when you know that celestial seasonings is run by a eugenics cult who believe Adam and Eve were aliens meant to eradicate all the dark races.
W H A T ?!
On grocery shelves across the country, adorned with perhaps the least intimidating bear ever, sit seemingly innocent boxes of Sleepytime Tea
Oh….it’s true
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why the fuck would i check my email, thats where the fucking emails are
