fvck you up !

She’d been flying a lot more in the confines of their home, mostly hovering, this didn’t exactly classify as flying. But she had a new appreciation for the wings on her back, with an almost silent drop to the ground before Azula she shook her head with a small chuckle. “Unflattering is not a word I associate with you.” Plucking the disinfecting alcohol from her hand she would be fine with helping. Something told her this wasn’t the first time she’d patched someone up after getting into a scrape.

“I know we haven’t had much chance to talk about it since the ball, but with the wedding announcement and our names being on it …” Now it was her turn to be the bashful awkward one. “…but I wanted to tell you that there is nothing to worry about, this changed nothing from what we have now.” She smiled as she pressed a small scrap of linen soaked in disinfectant onto her wound. “We’ll get through it.”

azula held her breath, trying desperately not to yelp in pain. the damp linen stung her skin as she bit her tongue, hand latching onto tink’s arm to steady herself. “that... didn’t hurt one bit.” she lied through her teeth, applying bandages to her wound. 

the news of their wedding was a shock, especially since the attack at the ball. azula always thought she would marry for convenience; a powerful fire nation soldier or politician, perhaps. yet here she was in a foreign world, forced to marry against her will.

There was something about Ben’s grip that had always struck such a chord with Rey. It seemed to signify so much about Ben’s nature: firm, but skilled. Even now, as he pulled her onto his lap and held her there, he seemed to know exactly how to handle her. His grip on her hips reminded him of the way he’d grip his lightsaber in battle, and her hands chose to take a detour on their way to his chest to solidify a wager she’d made in her mind. Indeed, his muscles on his arms were just as solid as she thought they’d be, and her fingers clumsily splayed in an effort to touch as much of his as possible.

Even now, as her hands rested on his heaving chest, she craved more, needed more. A sensation began to pool somewhere low in her stomach as his lips traveled south, him calling her name echoing in her brain for all the right reasons. She couldn’t get enough of his lips on her chest and was about to thread her fingers in his hair when he pulled back ever so.

Huffing slightly, Rey leaned back herself as she tried to come up with an audible response that wasn’t just a moan. Chest heaving under her corset, she licked her lips and blinked before replying. “Shirt. Off. Now.” she ordered, pulling at the bottom of his blouse for emphasis. She wasn’t quite there yet, not quite drunk enough on desire to disrobe yet. She needed to see that torso she’d glimpsed only once before.

ben’s eyes widened in shock, nodding mutely at rey’s demand. her hands yanking the bottom of his dress shirt sent him over the edge as he could feel himself stiffen under his trousers, his face flushing a furious red. he hoped she couldn’t tell, his heartbeat quickening in his chest.

With a hint of pink on her cheeks she stood on the second floor with her hands on her hips, chin lifted proudly ( yes, like peter pan ) grinning at the thought of anyone thinking she was battle-hardened.

Seeing Azula’s limp she pouted slightly, “You should be careful on that leg.” while she wasn’t going to tell Azula to stay home because she knew she wasn’t the type to. She could certainly offer her advice to be careful, not that tink would listen to her own advice. Flitting back down to Azula’s side, wings hovering around her casting the room in a golden glow, the sun filtering through like a stain glassed window. “Not that you need someone to help you, but do you want help?”

azula smiled, her eyes following the fairy’s wings as she floated around the room. she was glad to see tink feel better after the battle at the ball. though she wouldn’t show it, she had a few sleepless nights thinking about whether she’d be able to fly again. 

it was odd, to say the least, being alone with ben. so much had changed in the last few years of han’s old life, that he felt like he didn’t really know ben anymore. it was one of the things the long list of his regrets. once he realized that they were both here in this new place, he was grateful at this second chance of life. at least now he had a chance to right all the wrongs he had made when it came to his family.

he led the way through the den. this was his kind of environment. he felt right at home in the midst of a crime hub. “ nope, “ he answered his son honestly. han never trusted anything, or anyone, for the most part. he always said that was what kept him alive through all the scuffles he found himself in. “ don’t worry kid. it’ll be fine. can’t be any worse than some of the places chewie and i found ourselves mixed up in. “ a small smile touched han’s lips as he thought of his old friend.

ben winced, chewie’s cries of anguish at watching his friend die still fresh in his mind. ben could never read his father. he was sure that they had grown into two totally different people. he was angry at his father on that bridge, angry for abandoning him in his time of need. and yet when ben drew his saber through his own father, han solo didn’t look angry. his eyes reflected something much more; sadness and regret. he remembered his father’s last gesture, placing a gentle hand on his face, just like he did when ben was a boy. 

Rey hummed pleasantly when Ben’s lips found hers, her heart leaping to take residence when he kissed her gently. His tenderness and care was so un-characteristic to the man she’d fought. Sure, there’d been glimpses, but they’d only been mere glimmers in the swaths of darkness that tended to surround their relationship. Now, here Ben was, just as nervous and excited as she. There was a strange comfort to it, and she found herself leaning her cheek into his calloused hand.

The increased urgency and need in his kisses did not frighten Rey. Much to her chagrin, she seemed to quite enjoy the way that the nervous tenderness melted away to something rougher, hinting at a carnality she was sure she’d only seen on the battlefield. A noise she didn’t recognize tore forward from her throat when his hands rested on her hips, and she could feel her face turn a deep crimson as he pulled away.

Yet he was the one to mutter an apology. This was who Ben was; awkward, but with his heart in the right place. She found it all so endearing as she took his hands in hers. “Ben, it’s okay, I…I-I think I liked it.” she admitted slowly, her own disbelief at her words showing clearly in her expression. “You don’t have to apologize…” Rey moved his large hands to rest on her hips as she continued in a whisper, “Or stop.”

ben swallowed hard, his hands reluctantly grasping her hips. his dark eyes searched hers, her reluctant but curious expression mirroring his. he knew that under all the awkwardness in the room, was a hint of excitement; he wondered if she felt it too. 

seeing rey brought forth a strong feeling in him, he felt it the moment he laid eyes on her. it was something he had buried deep inside of him, refusing to act on it under any circumstance. it was a strong urge to be near her, to touch her. ben pulled her closer, tightening his grip on her. he inched closer, lips meeting hers once more. 

Rey could feel Ben tremble ever so under her touch, and her heart did a sort of fluttering thing in her chest. Who would have thought that this burly, stoic wall of a man was so susceptible to tenderness? It warmed her from the inside out, and his further promise to get her back home solidified just how far he’d come in however long he’d been here.

Yet, Rey came to the same realization as Ben. If they did go back, they’d have to be separated once more. A pang in her gut caused her glance to flicker to the side and she resolved to not talk about such things anymore. Well, not tonight anyways. She’d been given a second chance to be with Ben, to hold him and to explore this spark that had become a flame before burning out so spectacularly on Exegol.

Rey worried with her bottom lip for a moment as she pondered whether or not to ask him something. Inhaling deeply, she gave him a nervous smile. “I-I’m sorry, I don’t know why I’m so nervous, a-and I’m not sure why I feel like I need to ask, but I…” She took a breath and held it for a moment, wanting to choose her next words carefully.

“It seems that every time we’ve…kissed, it’s been in the worst of circumstances, surrounded by death and fear. So, now that we’re alone and at peace, can I…umm…” Her eyes bravely searched his, terrified of rejection. “Can I kiss you again?”

ben’s breath hitched in his throat, looking into rey’s eyes. she was tentative, nervous. their kisses were always rushed, always with the assumption that they could die at any moment. his heart raced in his chest, rey’s frame pressed up against his. he had come to the realization they were in her chambers, alone. no angry uncle luke to interrupt them.

he held his breath, looking at her soft expression. his attraction to her was undeniable, to say the least. the clothes in this world fit her well, from her dark hair in ribbons to her jewelled dress. ben wanted nothing more. he nodded wordlessly, he did want to kiss her again, almost desperately so. 

he had never been with any girl. he was too focused on his training, on ruling the galaxy. han wasn’t around to give him girl advice either. ben decided to take the leap anyway. he leaned in, gently tilting her head to the side. he pressed his lips onto hers, hands stroking her soft face. something took hold of him, a need to be close to her. his kisses turned rough, hands dropping to her waist before he pulled away sharply. 

ben had never really spent alone time with han since he was a child. there was some lingering awkwardness when they were together; each refusing to speak of the troubles they faced as father and son. he followed his father through the marketplace, weaving through the crowds to get to the smuggler’s den. 

Rey should have been worried when Ben admitted he’d been trying to leave this horrid world fortwo months. She should have balked at the possibility that this was their new world, their new reality. However, call it the Optimist in her, or her inner child, but she clung to his uncharacteristically gentle word about wanting to watch over her.

Her brow knitted a touch when he fumbled over his words, and she laughed in spite of herself. Sitting up to view him better, she was floored to see the dusting of color on his cheeks. Had she made Ben Solo blush? She found herself blushing at his words now, his words rendering her wordless.

“You…You were watching me?” she asked, running a hand mindlessly through his dark hair, tilting her head to the side a bit as she searched his gaze. “I’m glad to see that Kylo Ren at least turned out to be somewhat of a gentleman” she teased, tugging his hair playfully before continuing to run her fingers through it. This proclivity towards physical contact, these raw emotions that were starting to burn deep within her…Rey was starting to realize that their exchange on Exegol before he passed hadn’t been heat of the moment. There really wassomething there. To see it manifested in such a gentle, yet awkward Ben Solo was…almost jarring in and of itself. He was almost unrecognizable in his tenderness, his sweetness, his care.

It was something she wouldn’t mind getting used to one bit.

rey’s fingers raking through his hair made him shudder, her words making him even more flustered than he was before. momentarily glancing away to compose himself, he nodded mutely. he had been watching her as much as he could, making sure she was safe. he felt powerless at times whenever her could see her struggle alone. he had reached out to touch her, called out for her, but he couldn’t reach her. 

the mention of kylo ren made ben wince, thinking of the times he let his anger and grief consume him. that dark persona, of course, had shattered the moment rey had reached out to touch his hand. it felt great to be by her side, holding her and having her touch him. being with her made him feel like ben again. 

It had been hard over the last few days with the heightened security and more people pressed into the slums. Everywhere she went people were packed shoulder to shoulder, it was like walking through honey. It felt sticky and it was tiresome. She’d only managed to sneak out of the slums once or twice returning to the warehouse this time with her little satchel of trinkets she’d pinched. Walking over the hoard pile she tipped the bag upside down letting the small bracelets and two or three ring clutter to the ground. It was a small pull, it had gotten more dangerous to sneak out and this was all she’d gotten. Turning on her heels with a slight annoyance she sighed, “well it’s not much.” She knew Azula would be lurking somewhere nearby. “It could be worse.” The tone of her voice would suggest that even she didn’t believe that.

Tink unfurled her wings, flying up to the second floor as her slightly torn wing had begun to scar over already, staring out the window through all the smog and clutter of the slums she could just make out the palace in the distance. The colour rising to her cheeks as she remembered the riot at the ball. They were lucky neither of them was seriously injured, the minor scraps and scared wings were nothing compared to what others had lost.

“there’s my little battle hardened fairy.” azula smirked, watching tink float in the air. she was glad she had recovered quickly, eyeing the faint lining of the scarred wing. azula walked to the table with a slight limp, her side still healing after coming into contact with a hunter’s knife. 

spilling the contents of her basket, she winced. fruits, a couple of green vegetables and a thin slab of rabbit meat. it was all she could steal off the carts in the slums. after the bridge was closed to the public and the patrols had doubled, she had to be extra cautious. 

All Rey could do was nod mutely at his suggestion, her breath coming in sporadic hitches. She held onto him, pulling him inside and closing the door behind them. Motioning her head towards her bed, she guided him over until her ankles touched the end of the bed. She sat on the edge, guiding Ben down with her. Her apartment looked barren and barely lived in, a sign of just how little she’d utilized any of the space since her arrival.

The scavenger curled up into Ben, her legs draped across his lap as she buried her face once more into his neck. Part of her hoped that maybe, just maybe, she’d wake up and realize none of this was actually real. Alas, as she pulled away and looked up, her surroundings were still the same. However, it was made better by having Ben here, her Ben.

“What are we going to do? C-Can we get back home? I don’t…I can’t…” Rey’s mind seemed to move faster than her mouth, causing her to jumble her words into a wordless stupor. She’d never relied on anybody but herself before. Now, she wasn’t sure she alone would be enough. Rey didn’t want to be this broken, blubbering mess for Ben, but she couldn’t keep it together. She needed ot be allowed to grieve and process it all.

ben had carried rey into her chambers setting her gingerly onto the bed. he continued to stroke her hair as she sobbed into the crook of his neck. she had been through so much. losing luke, leia, and han had been heartbreaking and not once had she stopped to grieve. she had always been expected to move on, to face the next adventure but what people failed to realize was that she was only human. an orphan whose only semblance of a family had been killed. 

for years ben had seen her as a threat, as a hurdle to his destiny. but the moment their hands touched on ahch-to, everything changed. she consumed his thoughts. he thought it had been hatred, obsession. it wasn’t until he was dying in her arms that he realized it was love, something he didn’t get to tell her. ben found it wildly inappropriate to tell her now, as she had basically sat crumpled and broken. instead, he sat with her in silence, wrapping his arms around her.

Wave after wave of shame crashed into Rey at Ben’s remarks, each one hitting like a lash from a whip. He was angry and absolutely had every right to be. His unwillingness to look her in the eye was the true twist of the knife that caused her stomach to fall straight through to the floor.

The pain that emanated from him caused her heart to shatter all over again. In her own way of trying to keep them safe, she’d only ended up hurting him, something she swore if she ever got the chance she’d never do again. It honestly surprised her that he came; she didn’t deserve it after all of this.

When her eyes were finally able to meet his, that absolutely did her in. Stumbling to close the gap, she flung her arms around his neck and began to openly weep for the first time. She went completely limp save for the arms clinging to his neck, everything finally hitting like a ton of bricks. Rey had died, been brought back to life, lost the love of her life, won a war, found herself in a strange land almost divorced from the Force, almost forced to marry a stranger, then found Ben again, then nearly died in a massive riot. She couldn’t be strong anymore, not right now. Enough was enough. Rey was finally breaking down.

“I-I’m not o-okay, I can’t d-do this…” she blubbered into his neck, her tiny frame racked with sobs as she clung to him for dear life. She couldn’t even speak, other than to reiterate how notokay she was. All she’d ever known was how to hold her own. Now, all she wanted to do was hold him and let go.

ben caught rey in his arms as her tiny frame went limp against his chest. rey had always been strong. he had seen her in rage and joy, but never like this. she was exhausted, consumed by grief. he held onto her, his heart aching as he heard her sobs. 

Rey sighed as she glanced around her tiny apartment, grunting as she righted herself. Ever since the horrific events at the palace, Rey had done her hardest to lay low and stay out of trouble. She had tried to run small errands in hopes of finding Ben, but what could she do? What could she say? Knowing he was out in the world, there was a gravity that seemed to push squarely onto her chest, keeping her from leaving her bed very much. She was in a completely different realm, with only Ben and Finn that she knew of. She wanted to be happy, wanted to be thankful…Yet she couldn’t feel anything other than sorrow and fear.

One of her outings gave her a glimmer of hope. She’d found where Ben lived, though entirely by accident. Scribbling a note with her address, Rey slipped it under his door in hopes that he might find her soon enough. The Force had not been particularly yielding here in this realm, and she’d been struggling to gain a foothold, let alone even reach out to him. She could only hope that he wouldn’t be furious with her absence.

A solid knock on the door jolted her from her haze. Throwing on some slender men’s breeches and a flowing men’s blouse that tied around the collar area, she padded warily over towards the door. Opening it up, she offered him a weary smile. “I’m sorry…” was the first thing she could say as she looked up into his eyes, “Ever since the ball, I-I’ve just been…I-I’m not okay.” It was tough for Rey to confess that she was struggling, but she didn’t know what else to do, who else to turn to.

ben swallowed hard. he didn’t know whether to scream or take her in his arms. he thought she had been hurt, or worse. the past week had been a tireless search for her. he had even consulted non-humans in the slums for her whereabouts to no avail. but here she was, standing before him in one piece. 

“you disappeared for so long,” ben said, unable to hide the pain in his voice. he shifted his gaze to the floor, unable to even look at her. “you didn’t bother to tell me you were okay. that you were safe.” he chided, running a hand through his dark hair. he could feel the heat rise up in his face, he didn’t want to lose control. not again and especially not at her. 

Tink had been eating a pastry with a glass of red wine as the priest had been shot, dropping both she’d stained her dress with deep red from the cherry pastry and the wine. Chaos had erupted around her and it found its way to her. Her hands started glowing before she even noticed, having guards running at her she did her best to duck under swinging swords, blasting them with dust and light into a state of unconsciousness. Running from the pile of sleeping bodies she left, she saw some familiar faces of the rebellion, scooping down she plucked up a sword from a fallen guard that was not her own work, blood coating her fingers as she continued to run, the heavy long dress slowing her down. Glancing down at the thing she groaned loudly before slamming into someone.

The familiar mop of black hair and the green that she so often found accompanying her when she walked, she stared up at Loki, standing there and watching events unfold with a grin. “Please don’t let me interrupt.” Her sarcastic quip as sharp as the sword in her hand, she turned to fend off another guard, the poor man looking out of his depth at a battle raged on. Turning back to the man of mischief she yelled at him, “Do something!”

loki had been watching the events unfold, an amused look on his face. “why hello, miss belle. occupied i see.” he teased as she attacked the rookie guard before her. loki was no stranger to fighting in bloody battles, but watching them was way more fun. a call came from tinker belle’s lips, one calling him to action. he took a look at her and the guard and rolled his eyes begrudgingly.

Her mouth opened to say something about grabbing the last few things and then making a swift exit, but her words were struck down as she watched an arrow fly past and find its home in the priest’s head. A small surprised gasp was the only thing that managed to make it out of her mouth.

With a grin that could rival the devil’s she nodded too, this is the opportunity they spoke of, it was now or never. “Let’s take what we are owed.” In this case, it was the Queen’s head. Rushing forwards she threw her hands out, gold and white dust bursting forth into the faces of two guards who were rushing towards other members of the rebellion, this battle would not fail, they would get their freedom.

a wry smile spread across azula’s lips, conjuring blue flames from her palms. it felt good to use her bending again after years of hiding it from hunters and guards. shedding her rabbit coat, she got into a fighting stance. leaning her back against tink’s, blasting guards with fire as she flung her magic dust in their faces. 

Rebellion. It was a word that she’d become synonymous with and, judging by the fact that the Queen was why she was in this awful garment and set to pair off with a stranger, she could only rationalize that the Rebellion were the ones in the right.

“We fight. We try to save as many as we can and avenge those we can’t. Fortunately, this is something I’ve become quite good at. Are you prepared to finally accept that you’re Rebel Scum?” She teased him, though they’d only ever fought on the same side twice, and one of those times, he betrayed her. She wanted to trust him, but she couldn’t ignore their history.

“Can you give me a quick rundown of this conflict? Something tells me you’ve been here a lot longer than I have. It would explain why I could never…” She trailed off, unable to finish her sentence. Him being here would explain why she could never feel him in the Force.

ben coughed, fighting to suppress a chuckle. he took rey’s hand, intertwining his fingers with hers. “if rebel scum means i’ll fight by your side, then i am.” he grinned, tracing small circles in her palm. he never thought he would turn. he had always been filled with hate and regret and fury, but rey saw through it all. 

it didn’t upset han when ben couldn’t look at him directly. it might have, at first, but han had a good inkling as to why. he couldn’t imagine how tough this whole situation was on ben. it was complicated enough for han. he had forgiven ben the moment he stepped out on that platform. there was no use in holding on to the past. it was over, and they had a second chance at being a family - even if the dynamic was a little strange. han had a lot of regrets in his life, and this second chance wasn’t going to be wasted.

han nodded his head in agreement. it was a stupid law. even the emperor didn’t come up with laws this stupid. han had seen what laws and rules a fearful leader could come up with, and he knew better than to ask too many questions. asking questions got you killed. he squeezed ben’s shoulder in solidarity. man, where was leia when he needed her? she really was better at this.

“ rey can fend for herself, “ he said, knowing it to be the truth. in fact, he saw a lot of himself in her. that didn’t mean he also wouldn’t raise arms against anyone who even thought about harming her. he had grown fond of her in their short time together. “ i get a feeling that’s not what’s bothering you though, “ he said, curiosity in his tone. “ what exactly did i miss? “ he got the feeling there was more to the story that he didn’t know.

ben did know rey could fight her way out of any dangerous situation, but something else was getting under his skin. he knew, and he was pretty sure his father knew too. his care for rey went beyond wanting her safe. he turned to his father, eyes meeting his for the first time in a long time. they shared each others dark colored eyes.