Just Another Casuality of Eddie Munson

Wanting to make up for the…let’s say less than ideal beginning to our first date, I let you pick the restaurant for our second date and it was perfect! No interruptions, no weird onlookers being nosey, just me and the boy who’s slowly but surely wedged himself inside my heart, with no intentions of leaving anytime soon. Still no labels, which I kinda like not having that immediate pressure. Just spending time with my favorite metalhead who I get to kiss now whenever I want!

It’s been a little over 2 months since that first night I saw you behind the bar at The Hideout and I want to do something special for you. Halloween is coming up soon and the weather is supposed to be perfect for the outdoor picnic date I’ve been thinking about.

As I get ready to head to The Hideout for your show tonight I think about how I’d like to ask you out on a third date. This is a big step forward in a relationship. A second date might show that you want to get to know someone better but a third definitely says I’m serious about this. Maybe it’s time for a label, if you asked me to be yours I’d say yes in a heartbeat!

I look over my freshly cut hair in the mirror as I try to get ready. My friend back home said the change might help so I chopped off a good amount of length and then dyed it red. You haven’t seen it yet so I want to make a good first impression. I curl a few loose pieces to bring out the volume in the layers and then give it a light teasing with my fingers. For every show I’ve worn my Corroded Coffin shirt I made. Tonight I pair it with a black blazer and light washed torn denim jeans. Wanting to feel more feminine, I opt for a pair of short heeled boots as I stare at my shoes.

As I drive, at your insistence, instead of walking to the bar I smile thinking about how lucky I am that I decided to go out that first time, or I might never have met you. Considering this isn’t my first show I’ve gotten the timing down pretty well. I arrive with just enough time for you to make me a drink before you have to head backstage.

Tonight is no exception. I walk into the bar and spot you in your usual place. I feel like one of the regulars now as I walk up, “Hi Eds. I missed you! How was band practice last night?” Leaning on the counter with my head in my hand I instantly get lost in your gorgeous brown eyes.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Ever since what happened in ‘86, there had only been a few times where I truly felt like myself again. Not counting the times when the band and I play. But rare instances where I feel like Eddie again. I’ve always been looked at weird, that’s normal, but now it’s with the fear that I’ll be driven out of town or have something thrown at my head. People have always called me a freak, that’s something I grew used to since I was 10. Murderer? I’ll never get used to hearing that. Whenever I’m with them, my friends who suffer the same nightmares as me, the same trauma, that’s when I begin to feel like myself again. I don’t have to pretend everything didn’t happen.

But you? It doesn’t matter that you don’t know. I feel like myself with you for a completely different reason. I feel like how I used to feel before everything happened, before Chrissy went catatonic and the lights flickered in mine and Wayne’s home, before I swam through a gate in Lovers Lake and got pulled into a dark dimension of Hawkins, before I almost got eaten alive by inter dimensional bats. And that, to me, is the most weightless feeling imaginable.

Seeing you every week, talking to you on the phone nearly every night, it’s my favorite thing. You are my favorite thing. Our second date, going to a late-night diner of my choosing, eating breakfast for dinner and sharing a slice of pie after, I have found what I would describe as my “ideal perfect date”. And I can’t wait to experience more of those with you. Taking things slow, like we are, has been really nice, although I don’t know if this puts a label on us. Are you my girlfriend? Do I need to ask you first? Maybe I should ask you.

But then I realize if I do ask you that, then I need to open up to you more, be honest, and I don’t know if I’m ready for that yet. I was introduced to the horrors of reality in the worst way imaginable and I wouldn’t wish this knowledge on anyone. Would I want to do that to you? Would you even believe me? Sometimes, I feel like it was all just a dream. Until I look at myself in the mirror, or until I walk out my front door and remember I no longer live in Hawkins.

And after these last months of knowing you, after us going on a couple dates and having movie nights and talking on the phone with you until one of us falls asleep, I don’t know what I should do. What if you don’t believe me and I lose you? What if you do believe me and suffer the same nightmares as the rest of us?

I’m working behind the bar and I know you’ll be heading in soon, so I get your drink ready for you, pouring the mixture into a glass right as you walk in and I grin. Right on time. My grin widens when you walk over and tell me you missed me. “Hey, baby.” I rest my forearms on the counter to lean myself a little closer to you until I give you a kiss, humming happily at the taste of your lips before pulling away to answer your question. “Practice was great. We finally mastered ‘Only The Good Die Young’ by Iron Maiden. We’re playing it tonight.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I don’t think I’ll ever get used to hearing you call me baby, I love it! I love all your precious pet names for me. You’re kisses, like the soft peck you just gave my lips? Oh I know I’ll never get enough of those, and the little smiles you make afterwards? They are my favorite. My eyes flash to the drink you made me, already knowing what I want and getting it ready for me. I pull the glass towards me and lean in closer to you, lowering my voice just a bit to tease you before taking a sip, “I love it when you call me baby, you know that?”

As I pull back to sit comfortably in my stool, I lose myself in your eyes. My fingers mindlessly toying with themselves, “Thats awesome! I can’t wait to hear it Eds. I love when I get to hear a new song you’ve been working on.” I debate asking you right now to go on that third date with me but I don’t want to risk distracting you during your show. Especially if you said no. My brain mentally smacks my hand for even thinking that you’d say no. Have you seen the way he looks at you? Like you're the only person in the room? There’s no possible way he’d say no!

I toy with my lips. Curling them in and poking my tongue out a little before nervously bringing it right back in, “Hey um Eddie I……I brought my latest draft of my book. It’s almost finished if you want to read some of it— you know, after your show of course.” I take a big gulp of my drink. I can almost see the face my brain is making at me Chicken!

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

“Well, I love calling you baby,” I say as I reach for a strand of your hair and give it a gentle tug with my fingers. “This looks great, by the way. I like it a lot.” I twist the pieces of your hair between my pointer finger and thumb before letting it go, giving your cheek a quick peck before I’m standing up straight to get back to work but still giving you my attention. Like anything could really pull me away.

Honestly, the compliment on your hair was an understatement. Seeing you walk in with red hair and that cute haircut? I wanted nothing more than to jump over the bar and pull you away to go mess it up. You look so fucking good in red, it’s driving me a bit crazy.

My head turns to look at you over my shoulder when you tell me you can’t wait to hear the song. “It took us a little longer than we expected, but I’m looking forward to playing it for everyone. Iron Maiden is always a classic.” I shrug before I reach one of the higher shelves easily with my height to grab a bottle of liquor.

I feel like you’re a bit quiet tonight, knowing when you’re nervous and wondering what seems to be going on in that brain of yours. And then you ask me if I want to read the latest draft of your book and it makes sense. You probably are just nervous about me reading it. Excitedly, I turn around to face you. “Of course I wanna read it,” I chuckle like that’s a no-brainer since I told you on our first date how that’s something I wanted to do. “You brought it here?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

My heart flutters and my body shivers with delight when you compliment my hair and twirl a piece of it before kissing me again. I mourn the loss of your touch as you I watch you getting back to work, “Thanks Eds, I’m really glad you like it. It’s a big change but I’m happy with it.”

I try to answer you but I admittedly get a little distracted watching you reach up over your head to grab a bottle of liquor. Mesmerized by the way your body stretches up. I ground myself by grabbing the hair you’d just played with and twirling it myself.

I blush when you sound excited about reading my story. Maybe afterwards I’ll feel comfortable enough to ask you on another date, “Yeah I brought it. After your show maybe we could hang out and you can read it. Or I could just give it to you I mean I don’t need to be around for you to read it.” I take another sip of my drink again to silence my rambling, “I’m really excited to see you play, Iron Maiden is definitely in my top five! They’re not as high as Dio or Metallica though and definitely not as high as local legend Corroded Coffin, with their very handsome front man, Eddie Munson, but they’re pretty good.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

“We can hang out after,” I assure you with a nod, handing a customer their drink before making my way back over to you and grinning. “Did you drive here? I could follow you back to yours if you wanted,” I suggest before biting my lip and giving a sheepish chuckle as I rub the back of my head. “Sorry, I don’t mean to invite myself over.”

I look towards the door to see the band walking in and I beam. “The guys are here. I have to go set up.” I lean over and give the tip of your nose a quick kiss. “Enjoy your drink, baby. I’ll be having my eye on you from the stage.” I grin mischievously with a waggle of my eyebrows before I’m taking off backstage.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I watch you with a look of such adoration in my eyes as you tend to your last customer and then almost look a little embarrassed at your suggestion that you follow me back to my place tonight, “I did drive here. I know how you worry when I walk places,” I giggle a little at your protectiveness, “it’s ok. That sounds like a perfect plan Eds.”

For a moment I’m speechless as I watch you lean in and kiss the tip of my nose. My breath is further taken away when you make those flirtatious eyebrow wiggles at me. I offer you a shy wave and I blow you a kiss in return as you turn to go meet up with your band.

It isn’t long before the lights dim and you're making your way onto stage with your band. I can’t help the dreamy sigh I make as I watch you perform. The way your face lights up it’s like I’m getting a glimpse at the real Eddie. Not that your shy self isn’t absolutely endearing or really you but there’s just something about the energy I see from you every time you take to the stage. It’s intoxicating and I don’t think I’ll ever get enough of it.

The new song you’ve been practicing is incredible. I cheer extra loud during that part from my usual spot, unable to take my eyes off of you the entire time. As the last note of your final song fades I cheer for you again, excited for where the night will take us!

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

It makes me so happy to see you cheer us on every week. I don’t think it’s something I’ll ever get sick of, seeing your big smile before you’re clapping and saying my name. Hearing my name from your lips is probably becoming my favorite sound. And I just want to hear you say it more.

The excitement gets to me a bit. You just look so fucking good tonight and all I want is to kiss you until we’re gasping for breath while I have you pressed up against the wall of the alley just outside, kissing your neck and hearing you say my name as my hands explore your body.

I’m thankful that the guitar covers my crotch as I feel myself stiffen in my jeans, and my eyes are just boring into yours now as I sing N.I.B. I haven’t taken it off the set list since I surprised you with it that night.

When the set finally ends, I have to adjust myself a little before I sling the guitar off and set it on its stand, helping the guys pack up with the image of you beneath me still in my mind. I really need to get it under control before we go back to your place tonight, not wanting you to be uncomfortable if you notice I’m hard.

I decide to go out back and have a cigarette to clear my mind, looking up at the sky and counting the stars to give me something to distract myself from you. Every time I picture it, though, I have to start over. Realizing that it’s futile right now, I curse under my breath as I flick my cigarette away. It’ll go away eventually, I decide before I walk back inside. I walk over to you at the bar and give a lopsided grin. “You want to head out, sweetheart?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

As you go about your normal routine of packing up your gear I move to stand up and head back towards the bar to wait for you but as I unclench my thighs, that I didn’t even realize I’d been pressing so firmly together, I feel a rush of wetness from between my legs. A touch of blush colors my cheeks realizing how worked up I must’ve gotten from watching you play. I know it’ll take you a few minutes to finish so I head to the bathroom to fix myself a little before we head back to my place.

It doesn’t help much though because as I stand there looking in the mirror running my fingers through my hair trying to fluff it back out, I instantly picture your hands and fingers, wide spread, combing through the strands before grabbing firmly as you pull my head up towards your lips. Even though you’ve never explored my neck I can vividly picture your kisses extending along my jaw and down onto my throat. Would you be the kind of guy to suck at my neck and leave hickies to be admired later? Or would your touches be so soft that it left me begging and aching for more?

My own hand plays along with my fantasy as it leaves my hair and cups the back of my neck before sliding down further. My fingers press into my collarbone as the palm of my hand sits dangerously close to my chest. I can feel how hard my heart is pounding beneath the skin. Again I foolishly picture your hands exploring my curves and wondering what your hands would feel like cupping my bare breast or pinching my sensitive nipples.

The door to the bathroom opens and I quickly gather my thoughts. I take one last look in the mirror and realize that while my hair looks a little better my face is flushed and my pupils are dilated. I know you’ve got to be close to finishing so even though I know you might notice these things I head back out to the bar to wait for you.

I take care of my tab and then as soon as I turn around I see your cute face walking towards me with the most adorable grin, “Yeah I’m ready handsome. Let’s get outta here.”

We start to walk towards the door together. My train of thought from earlier isn’t getting any better having you right beside me now. Without thinking, I grab your hand in mine and hold it as we head to the parking lot.

The cool night air provides a little relief to my heated cheeks but it is also a little too cold so I lean into you with our arms pressed together, “The show was great Eds! I loved the new song and you know N.I.B is always a winner with me. But I gotta say,” my voice lifts a little along with my chin as I look up at you, “I think your originals are still my favorites.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Feeling you take my hand as we walk outside, I smile and give your fingers a small squeeze and pull you to me when I feel you press closer to keep yourself warm. I chuckle when you say you think the original songs are your favorites. “I appreciate that. We always get nervous about playing our stuff because we don’t know how people will react, but we haven’t heard a complaint yet. I think one drunk guy said one time ‘I haven’t heard that Sabbath song before.’” I chuckle and shake my head at the memory. “The best compliment someone could give.”

We get to your car and open the door for you once it’s unlocked, leaning my arms on the top of it and giving your head a kiss. “I’ll see you there, baby.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I love listening to you talk. You could be telling me tomorrow's weather and I’d still be completely smitten. When you open my door for me, like a perfect gentleman, I kiss your cheek before getting in the car, “Bye handsome! See you shortly.”

After I pull away and head towards my place, I feel a perpetual smile on my face thinking about being alone with you again. My mind hasn’t stopped picturing your hands rubbing all down my shoulders and hips while you press me against the wall. The longer I spend with you the harder it’s getting to keep my hands off of you! I pull up in my lot and wait for you to arrive so we can walk up together. It doesn’t take long since we left from the same place and in no time we are walking up the stairs to my apartment.

“I appreciate you taking the time to read this Eds,” I say as we walk down the hallway. I know that you’re coming over for a specific purpose and maybe it’s just that I’m really horny after watching you perform but it feels like you’re coming over to stay the night and I flush again when I imagine what your response might be.

I dig through my bag looking for my key as I try to laugh away my nerves, “Now don’t go easy on me ok! If something sucks or needs to be changed or if you have suggestions I’m all ears!”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

When I leave you to walk to my van, the image of your flushed cheeks and blown out pupils fills my mind. What’s got you so flustered? Is it me? Your skin felt extra warm when you had taken my hand and I wonder if maybe I affect you the same way you affect me. It just makes me throb in my jeans, thinking that I had turned you on while I was on stage.

Once we’re driving to yours, I keep a hand over myself and have to press some pressure into my hard cock with the palm of my hand to give myself some form of relief, biting my lip to hide my groans even though no one is here with me to listen.

Fuck, I know I’m only coming over to read your book, but I can’t help but think about what would happen if you were inviting me over for another reason. Would you initiate it? Or would you want me to take the lead? Would you want me to wait until we’ve reached your room? Or would you want me to press you up against your door once it’s closed behind us? I can picture it, my hands exploring every inch of your body and listening to the noises you’d make when I’d do something you liked. It’s crazy how often I’ve been popping a boner lately whenever we hang out as it is becoming increasingly difficult to not touch you.

Before I know it, we’re pulling into the apartment complex. I park a bit to where my van is a bit hidden before getting out and walking up with you to your apartment. Your words remind me of why I’m actually here, to read your book. I’ve been really looking forward to reading about the world you’ve created along with the story of the two lovers.

Hopefully, it’ll help get my mind off things. Chuckling at your words, I nudge you lightly. “I’m sure it won’t suck, princess. From what I can tell, you’re extremely creative and I’m really excited to read it. Thank you for trusting me enough to show it to me.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

My knees nearly buckle down as you call me princess. It’s a good thing my hand was on the doorknob because I’m able to use it as a support. I push the door open and usher you inside, “Come on in Eds.” I stand behind you guiding you playfully to my dining table, “Here sit, sit! Let me take care of you.” My words and movements quicken thinking about all the ways I’d like to take care of you!

“I mean you’re always serving me drinks, let me serve you!” My cheeks flare up and I fumble around trying to grab my draft for you to read, “A drink! I meant serve you a drink.” Wow. I think to myself, if your goal was to make a complete fool of yourself you nailed it Erica!

I know there’s no way I’m hiding how flustered I am right now and I wonder if you know that you’re the source of it all. Your smiles, your pet names, your playful winks and wiggly eyebrows, the outline in your pants I can catch every now and then of your cock—

I set my draft in front of you, “Here. You just sit and relax ok? I’ll get us something to drink.” I turn around and step into the kitchen to grab a bottle of wine and two glasses.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I can tell that something is up with you by the way you’re fumbling your words and how much you’re blushing. There’s no way you’re not thinking the same as me right now, and it only makes my cock ache for your attention.

I can’t help the snort that escapes me when you correct yourself on serving me a drink. How else would you like to serve me? I have to shut my eyes tightly, shaking my head subtly to get rid of the image of you on your knees under the table as I sit here and read your book.

My blunt nails lightly scratch at my denim covered thighs so I don’t reach for you, pulling you to me until you’re sitting on my lap and making you feel what exactly it is you do to me while squeezing your thighs and kissing you hungrily.

Clearing my throat, I give a smile when you set down the draft in front of me before I see you getting wine out. Grinning, I decide to be a little bold. “Are you trying to get me drunk so I have to stay the night, sweetheart?” I snicker. “All you gotta do is ask, baby.” I feel like I’ve crossed a line as soon as the words leave my mouth, my heart pounding hard in my chest.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

My throat goes dry when you tease me about trying to get you drunk. With the bottle in one hand and the two glasses held carefully in the other I freeze just feet from where you’re sitting at the table. Chewing on my lip nervously when you say if I want you to stay over all I have to do is ask. God I want that so badly! I want you to stay forever and make a home with you! I’m even more embarrassed because clearly my emotions right now are super easy to read but if you’re teasing me about it maybe it’s because you want the same thing. Still I start stuttering again and talking with my full hands, “No I wasn’t, I mean I could get you water instead, not that I wouldn’t want you to stay- I mean of course I want you to stay!” As soon as that sentence leaves my mouth I bite both lips between my teeth to shut myself up.

The look in your eyes seems to call me to you. As though this timid dance we’ve been doing around one another is about to come to an end, a delicious end where both of us finally give into our feelings and fall into one another’s arms. Fingers tangling in each other's hair, tasting each other’s mouths with fervent desire! Another rush of wetness makes itself known in my panties.

Before I drop them I set the things in my hand down on the table and pour the suddenly poisonous looking red liquid into the glasses. Lifting one of them to my own lips I take a sip before sliding yours across the table to you, my body so elegantly following along with it pressing against your leg. Your comment about just needing to ask emboldens me and that sip of wine seems to swallow all my nervousness. I lean down slowly close to your ear. My full lips just barely grazing the soft skin of your earlobe. When I open my mouth to speak it’s a feathery light whisper full of all my desire and intentions, “Eddie? Would you like to stay the night?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I can’t help the look of adoration that crosses my face as you begin to stammer and ramble before you’re saying you want me to stay. It leaves my heart racing at the realization that you seem to want exactly what I want.

I don’t move, not wanting to push you and let you figure out how to go about this even though all I want is to stand up, set you on this table and get my fingers in you.

Watching you move, my eyes follow your hands as they set the wine glasses down and pour the wine into them. I watch you take a sip from one of them and I swallow hard as you slide my glass over to me. My eyes are transfixed on the crimson liquid before I feel you press against my leg as you lean down and whisper in my ear while asking me to stay the night. The way your tone is, I didn’t know I could get any harder than I already am and it’s becoming borderline painful.

With a huff, I turn my head to look up at you from where I’m sitting. You’re still leaning down near my face and our noses brush, my breath is coming out a bit heavily as I search your eyes, trying to make sure this is definitely something you want. When I don’t see any hesitation, I turn to my glass of wine and drink it down quickly to get a buzz before I’m standing up, towering over you.

Reaching over, I tuck some hair behind your ear as I look into your blue eyes. “I’d like that very much, Erica,” I agree easily, my fingers trailing down the side of your neck to your collarbone.

My hands are trembling slightly, it has been a long time since I’ve been with anyone like this although I’m not sure exactly what is going to happen. All I know is that I need my hands on you and I need to feel you pressed against me. And that’s exactly what I do. Wrapping an arm around your waist, I pull you in until your body is flushed against mine, knowing you’ll be able to feel my hard cock through my jeans like this. I let out a shaky breath as my eyes trail down to your lips and then your neck before I decide to kiss your lips first. My other hand finds home in your hair, pulling you closer and smashing my lips to yours in a hungry kiss.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I feel my hands start to tremble and my heart pound in my chest when you turn and look at me. I instantly become aware of how close our faces are. Your nose brushes mine in the sweetest little touch. Our eyes connect and convey so much in such a short moment before you suddenly swallow your wine and stand over me.

Your voice makes me melt from the inside when you tuck my hair back and tell me you’d like to stay. The rough, calloused tips of your fingers trace down my skin and send shivers through every nerve ending in your path. I can feel you trembling. I bring my hand up and meet your arm that wraps around my waist.

When you pull me in closer a gasp leaves my lips. Your body feels amazing against mine. I lean into your warmth and press my thigh against your leg, I feel your hardness against me and I let out another heavy breath thinking that you might let me see it, touch it, suck it— my thoughts are halted because your hand grabs into my hair and our lips crash together.

You taste so good. My eyes fall shut and I let go of my inhibitions. I reach you and wrap my arms around your neck. My fingers find their way into your hair. I pull you closer wanting to be as close as possible. I let you take control of the kiss but after a moment I part my lips inviting your tongue inside my mouth. The taste overwhelms me and my legs turn to jello as we continue to kiss, “Please touch me more Eddie. I want to feel you.”

My arms cling to you for dear life! You’re my lifeline and without you I’d float away. My knee presses between your legs and I feel your hard dick against me again. In between more hungry kisses I speak, my voice low and heavy, “I can feel you Eds.” The next part comes out a quiet whisper, “So big” I pull back and look up into your eyes as I hang off your neck, “Can I help you out with that?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

The moment I feel your fingers in my hair, I deepen the kiss and feel you part your lips for me, my tongue exploring your mouth and I hum at the taste of you. If your mouth tastes this good, I wonder how your pussy tastes. My arm tightens its hold around you when it feels like you might fall before your breathing against my lips and telling me to touch you more.

I let out a harsh huff of air as my cock twitches at your words before I back you up into the kitchen island and press you against it, bringing my lips back to yours while my hands begins to slide down your body, taking in your curves. Fuck, you’re perfect. I want to lay you out on this island and put my face between your thighs, eat you until you're saying my name like a prayer.

I go to do just that when I suddenly feel you press your knee into my cock and I groan at the friction, pressing my hips a bit firmer against you to prolong the sensation. My hands squeeze your sides harshly for a moment before I release them and give a soft apology.

Your words, the way you breathe them out and tell me you can feel me, it leaves my head spinning with need. I need you to touch me, I need to feel your hand around my cock. And I have to brace my hands on the counter of the island behind you, my rings clinking against the fake granite, so my knees don’t buckle when you ask if you can help me out.

I look down into your eyes, my chest heaving up and down at just the thought of you touching me so intimately. I know I have a wet patch soaking through my jeans from my precome. I know I won’t be able to last long enough. Maybe if you let me touch you first, let me take care of you and we can worry about me later.

“You will, baby,” I breathe out against your lips with a quick nod, my eyes slightly wide and my pupils blown out with lust before I’m suddenly placing my own knee between your thighs and pressing against your clothed cunt. “But I want to make you come first. Will you let me do that, sweetheart?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

The anticipation builds when I feel you press my back against the kitchen island. I hear the clink of your rings echoing through the quiet of my apartment. The only other noises coming from our kisses and needy breaths. I lose myself in the feeling of your hands on me. My own continuing to explore your neck and upper back beneath your hair. I let out another whimper when I hear you call me baby and feel your knee press between my legs and ask to make me come first. Of course you're a gentleman who’d want to please his girl first before himself. Not that I'm complaining, my pussy is so wet and achy for you that I know when I take my jeans off you’ll be able to see a wet spot on my panties. I briefly curse myself for not wearing a skirt tonight.

My hands slide along your shoulders as I keep kissing you. They make their way down your chest and land on the button to my jeans. With my hands wedged between us I start desperately clawing at my pants, “Fuck Eds yes! Yes! Want you to make me come!” My heart pounds faster knowing what you’re about to do and I slip my arms lower pushing my jeans to the ground, exposing my silky smooth black and red panties to you.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

“Yeah?” I breathe out with a grin, your desperate tone giving me a boost of confidence before I’m pulling away to watch you pull your jeans down. I let out a harsh breath through my nose as I take in the sight of your bare legs, reaching out and running my hands up and down the soft skin of your thighs. My mouth waters just looking at you in your black and red panties, my thumb running along the sides of them at your hips. “Fuck, Erica, you’re so…fuck,” I breathe out in a near whine before I’m leaning in and kissing at your neck.

Once you’ve taken off your jeans, I help you step out of them the rest of the way as my hands explore under your shirt, feeling the soft skin of your waist, your back, my thumbs running across the edges of your bra.

My lips leave hot, open mouthed kisses along your skin, gently sucking but not leaving a mark, just wanting to feel your skin between my lips, my teeth. With every gentle nip I give, I soothe it over with a swipe of my tongue.

My hands leave your skin to start pushing your blazer off your shoulders. “Can I see more of you, baby?” I ask in a hot whisper in your ear before I’m taking your earlobe between my lips and giving it a brief suck.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

My body quite literally melts like butter under your warm touch. I throw my head back giving you better access to my neck and I feel your hand exploring under my shirt along my curves and waist. The roughness of your fingers is absolutely divine against my skin. My breath hitches as I feel you run your thumb along my bra line. I let out a whimper under your touch, “Fuck Eds your hands feel so good.” I can feel the grin your lips make against my neck as you keep giving me the most erotic kisses I’ve ever experienced.

I match your touches by bringing my hands lower towards your hips and curling my fingers into your belt loops. The tips of my thumbs slipping under your shirt and feeling your skin. I know my touches affect you the same way in the way your mouth gently starts to suck just a little harder on my neck. I know you’re being gentle enough not to leave a mark and when you swipe your tongue over, tasting me I can’t help the moan I let out as I fall into your arms even more.

When I do your hands start taking my blazer off. You rock me to my core when you ask if you can see more of me. I look up at your through my messy bangs and already fucked out, hazy eyes, “I want you to see all of me Eds.” I help you shrug my blazer off leaving me in just the Corroded Coffin shirt I made for you and my panties. Before you can take my shirt off I hold your hand as I look into your blown out brown eyes. I guide your hand up under my shirt to cup my covered breast in your palm. Squeezing my own fingers over yours into the squishy softness of my chest. Our faces come together in another kiss and I whisper against your lips, “Touch me Eddie.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

When I feel you touch my skin under my shirt, I freeze up a little, having almost forgotten about my scars. The subtle touch of your thumbs burn in the best way and I want to feel more, but I’m not ready for you to see me yet. Gently, I take hold of your wrists and place your hands on the counter behind you while you help me work your blazer off.

My hands reach for the bottom of your shirt but I stop when you take my hand and guide it towards your bra covered breast. I pull away from your neck to look down at you, my eyes wide with desire. Seeing you in just your panties and the Corroded Coffin shirt that you made does something to me and I let out a small noise when you tell me to touch you again.

I nod, letting my other hand move up to your other breast and give it a squeeze as well before I’m reaching down once again for the bottom of your shirt, looking into your eyes to see if this is okay. When I don’t find any reluctance from you, I run my hands up your sides as I push your shirt up, feeling your soft, warm skin under my hands before I’m taking the shirt off above your head and let it fall to the floor at our feet. I look you over, my eyes roaming every inch of your body. “You’re so beautiful, Erica,” I breathe out softly before I’m capturing your lips again in a bit of a desperate kiss.

My hand finds home in your hair again while my other one begins to trail down your body, cupping your covered mound with my hand before my fingers start to rub the seam of your cunt through the wet material of your panties. “Fuck, can feel how wet you are for me,” I whisper against your lips as my thumb massages your clothed clit. “I want to taste you. Please tell me I can taste you, baby, please.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I giggle into your hair when you let out the cutest noises as your hand cups my other breast with a soft squeeze, “I like your noises Eds. I wanna hear them ok? Don’t be shy.” As I speak I lean in and kiss your cheek before leaning back once again so you can lift my shirt up over my head.

Standing there in my bra and panties my whole body ignites into flames under your intense stare. My pussy clenches around nothing hearing you call me beautiful, and the way you say my name with your deep lustful tone has me getting wetter by the second. Your voice and your touches make me feel desired in the best possible way.

The noises that gasp out from my throat as I feel your hand trail down my body and cup my covered pussy in your hand are absolutely feral. I gasp for breath and whimper all at once, collapsing into you harder this time. It’s a miracle I’m still standing. When I feel your finger massage my throbbing clit I don’t even try to hold back my noises anymore, “Oh shit, fuck! Eds god yes! Please wanna feel your tongue on my pussy please, here! Lift me up on the counter.” I take your hands in mine with haste and put them on my hips as I use my own to push myself up until my ass lands on the countertop. I lay back on the cold stone surface and present myself to you, “Please please Eddie! Eat my pussy! I need to feel your mouth on me like now!”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Hearing you moan from my touch is like music to my ears and I just add more pressure with my fingers to hear you louder before you’re suddenly begging me to put my mouth on you. I help you up onto the counter and let out a few huffs of air as I look you over while you’re laying back on the island just like I wanted.

“Fuck, Erica,” I breathe out as I run my hands up and down your soft thighs before leaning down and kissing your stomach, your hips. I nip softly at your skin and take in every noise you make for me, grinning to myself at the fact that I’m making you sound like that.

My fingers dip into your skin and slide against your hip bones as I hook them into the waist of your panties, looking up at you for permission before I pull them down your legs. I groan at the sight of your wetness stringing to them before I kiss down one of your legs with open mouthed kisses all the way to your ankle before I let your panties drop to the floor with the rest of your clothes.

When I stand once again, I place my hands on your knees and spread your thighs to get a better look at you. My mouth waters at the sight of your wet pussy and I moan deeply at the knowledge that I get to finally taste you.

“So pretty, baby,” I say in a low, husky tone before I’m leaning in and kissing the insides of your thighs. I bite your right thigh gently, just needing to feel you in my teeth for a moment and I hum before I kiss the spot a couple times to soothe the skin. My face gets closer and closer to where you need me most, where I crave to be, before I’m finally leaning in more and licking a thick stripe up your cunt. My eyes nearly roll back at the first taste of you. “You taste so fucking good, sweetheart.” I say before I’m diving back in and shoving my tongue into your cunt, moaning at the taste that sends vibrations through you.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

My senses become completely overwhelmed as you touch, kiss, bite, and lick all over my inner thighs and down my leg. My mind becomes a swirling cloud of nothing but your name and the pleasure you’re making me feel right now.

I hear you say I look pretty as you spread my legs and rake your eyes all over my bare pussy. I encourage you to continue with all the noises I make, a particularly loud moan when I feel you finally put your mouth on me, “Ahh! Eddie, shit I love how your tongue feels. Don’t stop!”

I feel my hips bucking up a little into your mouth as you continue devouring me like your last meal. I feel that familiar pressure building when your tongue runs another long line up my sex, “M’gonna come Eds,” my hands that were clawing at the edges of the counter are now finding themselves tangled in your hair where your head sits nestled between my thighs, “Oh Christ! Right there Eddie, right there!” My pleas fall like a repetitive mantra from my lips as I guide you to helping me finish, “C-can you use your fingers? Feels so empty!”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I switch up from licking inside you to lightly sucking on your clit before going back to fucking you with my tongue, your noises and words encouraging me and clouding my brain. I’m purely focused on your pleasure, making you feel good and making you cum.

My cock throbs in my jeans and I have to unbutton my jeans and slide the zipper down to get a hand in and palm myself through my boxer briefs to gain some relief, groaning against you in the process. It’s when I hear you say that you’re gonna cum and I feel your fingers in my hair that I pull away from you for a moment to speak, my breath fanning over your soaked pussy, “Pull on my hair, baby. Can’t wait for you to cum on my tongue. You taste fucking amazing.”

My hands have been squeezing your thighs, keeping them spread for me so I can keep my face buried between them. I continue to eat you like a starved man until you ask me to use my fingers. When you say you feel empty, my cock throbs with need to be shoved deep inside you and I let out a huff at the thought of fucking you on this kitchen island.

“Anything you want, princess. I’ll get you to cum,” I nearly growl as I take my two middle fingers into my mouth to get them wet, my eyes never leaving yours before I’m suddenly latching my mouth onto your clit and pushing my fingers inside of you like you wanted. I move my fingers in you quickly, knowing you’re close and wanting to get you there, needing to hear how you sound as you cum all over my fingers.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Somewhere in my blissed out mind I hear you unzip your jeans and it sends shivers through my whole body at the thought of you pulling your cock out and taking me right here on the counter. I’m not quite ready to take that step yet but I know that one day, you and I will share those intimate moments together. I can feel it.

The amount of care and attention you are giving me right now has my heart pounding. I just know that when we do finally take that plunge you’ll be the most attentive partner I’ve ever had. I can’t help but giggle a little around my moans and whimpers because of course you are a giver. Of course you want to please your partner before yourself. As much as I think that I could lay here and let you eat me out for hours, I cannot wait to get on my knees for you and watch you come undone.

My fingers tighten when you tell me to pull on your hair. I shudder and my breath shakes when I look up to see you putting your fingers in your mouth before pushing them inside my hole. The quick thrust motion of your fingers would’ve been more than enough to push my over that edge and have the pressure in my core releasing all over your hand but when you put your mouth back on my clit and suck just enough it undoes me almost instantly, “Fuck, fuck! M’coming Eddie, m’coming!” A gush of wet slick slides out of my overstimulated cunt, all over your fingers and mouth.

As I lay there with labored breaths coming down from my high, I look up at you with hazy fucked out eyes, “That felt so goddamn good Eds, thank you.” After just long enough for me to catch my breath, I slide off the counter and down to the floor. Looking up at you from down on my knees with my messy hair, I grin as my hands reach up and massage firmly into the meat of your thighs, “Ok big boy, now it’s your turn.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I groan deeply as I watch you fall apart, fucking my fingers into you to ride out your orgasm for as long as you can take it before while mumbling encouragements into your skin as I litter your hips and thighs with kisses. I pull my fingers out and pop them into my mouth, moaning softly at the taste of you on my tongue.

My hands trail up and down your sides soothingly as you catch your breath, leaning down and leaving soft kisses under the wire of your bra as my thumbs rub circles soothingly into your skin.

I grin when you tell me that felt good and thank me, chuckling a little before you’re suddenly dropping to your knees and my eyes widen. The muscles of my thighs tighten under your touch and I swallow hard as you tell me it’s my turn. “Oh fuck,” I breathe out before resting my hands against the counter in front of me to hold myself up. “Please don’t laugh by how quickly I come,” I tell you in a breathy chuckle. “S’been a while.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I look up at you through my lashes with a big bright smile as you ask me not to laugh at you, “I’d never Eds. I wanna make you feel good.” My Hands keep rubbing your legs back and forth trying to reassure you with my touch that I’d never tease you about finishing soon. I flip the conversation trying to help you feel better but also address something that always caused a rift between Jackson and I, my horrible gag reflex.

“Promise you won’t tease me about my weak throat?” I lock my eyes with yours and my breath catches when my hands get closer and closer to your covered bulge. I look to you for permission before I ghost my hand lightly over your hidden length. My hand presses just a little more, feeling the shape of you, “You’re pretty big Eddie, I don’t know if I can take all of you at once.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Shaking my head, I shut my eyes tightly as I focus on trying not to come from just your words before you’re asking me not to tease you as well. My abdomen flexes and I grip the counter tightly because that was so fucking hot. “I promise. Wouldn’t dream of it, baby.” I assure you, opening my eyes again to watch you.

My breathing is heavy as you get closer to touching my cock before looking up at me and I give a small nod. “S’okay, baby,” I whisper shakily before I suddenly feel you touch me through my boxer briefs. My cock jumps from your touch and your words, causing a whimper to leave me as my eyes slip shut again while I imagine your mouth on me before it’s even happened yet. Then my mind wanders to how your pussy would feel stretched around my cock, giving you a little at a time so I don’t hurt you before I’m finally bottomed out with my hips flushed to yours. I bet you’d take me so well.

I keep those thoughts to myself. As much as I want it, I’m not ready to make that jump yet, wanting to do this right and not fuck anything up. “Erica…” I breathe out softly through a small whine as I become desperate for your touch. “I really need you, sweetheart. M’not above begging. Please, baby.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

My legs press together tightly and squirm under your noises and heavy breaths as I rub your thick cock through your boxer briefs. My heart swells with pride seeing how I affect you. When you start begging, my smile widens, “Anything for you Eddie.”

I bite my lip as I slowly work to pull your aching cock from its tight confines. My eyes widen when it springs out and I get to soak in the sight of you. The tip of my tongue pokes out wetting my lips before I whisper softly to myself, “So hard Eds, can’t wait to taste you.” Before I put my mouth on you I pump your length a few times with my hand admiring the way my painted fingernails look wrapped around you. Your skin feels so silky in my hand. I lower my head down and part my lips kissing and sucking at the swollen tip. I look up at you and smile as I sink lower, taking more of you in my mouth.

I was right you’re so big I can’t fit all of you in my mouth at once but my hand doesn’t leave the base as my mouth takes in the rest of you. The stretch around you feels so good. My head bobs back and forth as I moan around you, sending vibrations through your skin.

My eyes fall shut as I lose myself in the rhythm of nodding back and forth, “You taste so good,” I try to say around you before picking up my pace and sucking a little harder. I moan even more feeling and hearing how I’m affecting you.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I let out a small sigh of relief when you take out my cock, feeling less strained once it’s no longer confined to my underwear and jeans. Looking down at you, I watch your reaction and see how your eyes widen and you lick your lips. A small huff leaves me and my dick twitches when you tell me you can’t wait to taste me before you’re taking hold of me and pumping my shaft.

“Fuck, Erica,” I say through a whimper, precome dribbling out of the red, aching tip. My eyebrows pull together as my eyes fall shut once more, my mouth falling agape as I let out puffs of air before I suddenly feel your lips on the tip. A surprised sound leaves me and out lets out a breathy chuckle, my eyes opening and meeting yours before you’re taking more of me and I moan deeply. “Jesus Christ, baby.”

Placing a hand in your hair, just having it there to touch you and not to guide you, I watch as you slowly take more of me before you start to bob your head. Your mouth feels amazing, so warm and wet and tight as it works up and down my cock. My hand tightens in your hair when you moan around me, the vibrations sending a sensation up my spine that has me throwing my head back.

“Holy shit, keep doing that. Oh my god, baby, your mouth feels so good.” I say between grunts, my chest rising and falling as I breathe harshly. It’s when you suck harder that I feel my balls tighten along with my abdomen. I know I’m close already. “I’m gonna come soon,” I warn you through a breathless mumble. “Where do you want it, sweetheart?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Your cock in my mouth feels so good. The way it stretches my lips and slides in and out has my pussy even wetter. I feel myself getting worked back up. One hard suck brings with it a rush of your precum into my mouth which I gladly swallow up. The taste clouds my mind even more but your hand in my hair brings me back.

For just a brief moment I panic a little that you’ll take control of my head and start slamming in and out causing me to choke, but I’m delighted at the pleasant tug I feel as you just pull desperately at my hair. Your fingers wide spread against my head just grounding yourself, keeping your cock in my mouth I nuzzle into the feeling of your hand.

Your encouraging words and noises send a rush of joy through me knowing I’m making you feel good. My hands reach up as I continue to suck your length and I pull your balls from their confines as well. Gently rolling them between my fingers, I feel them tighten just as you tell me you’re going to cum. I lift up for air just enough to speak but still keep your cock in my mouth, “Cum on my tongue Eds. I wanna taste you.”

I continue to work your length, sucking a little harder, helping bring you closer to the edge. I shudder at the groans I hear you making above me and I pick up speed. Pumping my mouth faster and faster along you as I continue tenderly rolling your heavy balls in my hand. As soon as I feel them tighten again I pull off to open my mouth and stick out my tongue. I look up at you expectantly through my lashes, so fucking excited to taste your release.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

A guttural moan leaves my throat when you take my balls into your hand. “F-Fuck!” My hand on your hair tightens harder before I soothe, not wanting to hurt you. “Sorry,” I apologize breathily before I tighten the grip my other hand has on the counters, my knuckles turning white.

It’s when you tell me to cum on your tongue that I start to pant as my cock jumps and throbs in pleasure from your words, your mouth, fucking everything.

Your name leaves me again in a desperate whimper as you suck harder and move your mouth a bit faster along my length, the wet noises sounding so obscene and just getting me closer and closer. I suck in a sharp breath as you continue to massage my balls before the hot coils suddenly starts to snap. “I-I’m cumming. Fuckfuckfuck, I’m-“ I cut myself off when I moan desperately as I watch you pull off and stick your tongue out gather my spend. “Holy fucking shit, you’re perfect.” I groan out as I begin to cum on your tongue.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

From my place on my knees under you I get a great view of you coming undone after you regain control of your cock and finish yourself off. My tongue forms a cup in the center collecting your hot cum. I blossom under your praise when you call me perfect. My eyes flutter closed and I savor the taste of your seed on my tongue. I lap it back into my throat and swallow every last drop. My lips pop after and I look up at you and stick my tongue back out showing you that I swallowed all of it, “You taste so good Eds.” I stay on my knees for a moment and hug your legs, “I- I really liked all of that. Especially when you said I was perfect. I want to be a good girl for you Eds.” I wink up at you before getting back up and hugging you tightly.

After I pull back I kiss your lips, “I’m going to go change since I’m already basically naked.” I laugh a little and play with your hair, “I’ll be right back big boy don’t go anywhere.” I kiss the tip of your nose before scampering off to my room to change.

I blush a little when I see my appearance in the mirror on the back of my bedroom door. My hairs a mess my lips are full and fucked out, my blue eyes have a hazy post orgasmic bliss to them. I grab some cozy shorts, fresh panties, and a worn Black Sabbath shirt. Before I rejoin you in the kitchen. I immediately wrap my arms around your neck and kiss your hair from behind. I want to assure you that I loved every second of that. I tease you with a little whisper in your ear, “Your tongue felt so good Eddie. Loved the way you made me feel.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

My eyes don’t leave you as I watch you swallow all of it and stick out your tongue again to show me. My dick twitches a little at the sight before I tuck myself back in my pants. And it just twitches again when you say you want to be a good girl for me. Jesus Christ, she’s trying to kill me. I hug you back just as tightly and kiss your hair, taking in the scent of your shampoo and sighing contentedly.

A shy grin paints on my lips when you kiss me before you’re telling me you’re gonna go change. “I’ll be right here, sweetheart, I promise.” I can’t help but let my eyes rake over your body as you walk away from me, smiling to myself before I let out a breath and take my jacket off since I’ve had it on this entire time. Setting it on the back of one of the chairs at the dining table, walk back over to the kitchen island before I notice your clothes on the floor and pick them up for you.

I’m surprised when I feel you wrap your arms around me from behind but smile when I feel you kiss my hair before you’re whispering in my ear and I groan a little. I turn around to face you and place my hands on your waist, giving it a little squeeze. “Are you trying to get me worked up again? Cuz my recovery time is insane. Baby, I could live with my head between your thighs.” I smirk and lean in to kiss you deeply.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I talk into your mouth as we consume one another with our kisses, “M’sorry Eds, I swear I’m not trying to get you worked up. I just can’t get enough of you either. I could suck your cock every night if you’d let me.” My hands find your hair again. I feel your hands on me too and I love it. I want more and I after the events of the night so far I know that it’s only a matter of time before we take that jump together. I pull back and look up into your warm cocoa brown eyes and pull you down a little to kiss your forehead, “Now that you’re staying let me get you another glass a wine while you read my draft. After that maybe we can watch a movie.”

I pour us fresh glasses of wine and I sit at the table beside you while I wait for you to finish reading my draft. I bring my foot up on the chair with me and hug my leg as I watch you flip page after page. My heart pounds with the look of pure adoration on your face. You look like you're genuinely enjoying yourself and it makes my heart swell with happiness and bloom more with the feeling that I’m nervous to give a name to but I can feel it taking shape and taking hold of my mind, body, and soul. When you finish I lean in closer with my head in my hands, “So, what’d you think?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

“I’m sure you don’t, you minx,” I chuckle teasingly, nipping your bottom lip lightly before you’re saying you’d suck my cock every night and I groan, as I pull away. I rest my head on your shoulder as my dick twitches once again and I sigh. “You can’t say things like that, baby. I swear, you’re trying to kill me.” I let out a breathy chuckle before kissing your cheek and then you’re pulling away after you kiss my forehead to get us more wine. “A movie would be great.” I agree before you’re having me sit down and I start to read your story.

I become enraptured, a smile lighting up my face and I rub at my chin and cough into my fist in a way to cover my grin as I continue to read. I’m hooked on every word, my heart beating hard in my chest as I finish the first chapter before I lift my head to look at you sitting with your head in your hands watching me. I grin widely when you ask me what I think. “Are you kidding? It’s already amazing! I’ve only read chapter one and I don’t want to put it down.” I chuckle and look down and turn back a few pages. “I really like the description on this part right here. You’re so talented with putting in that detail.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I can feel how much my face lights up when you tell me how much you enjoyed the first chapter and pointed out a part you really liked, “Thank you Eddie. Not to be dramatic but you have no idea how much it means to hear you say that,” I grab your hand from across the table and rub my thumb back and forth against your skin, “You can take it home and read the rest of it because right now I want you all to myself.” I lean my face playfully towards you and crinkle my nose with a big smile. I grab both your hands and pull you up from your seat, “Come cuddle on the couch with me. I’ll put in a movie.”

I walk over to my shelf of VHS tapes and sit cross legged on the floor for a moment of pondering before grabbing a well worn copy of Nightmare on Elm Street. I pop it into the player and then join you on the couch. I see your confused expression when you see that I’ve chosen a horror flick, “Ok I know, I said I don’t like scary things or gore and this movie has both,” I plop down next to you and curl my legs up on the couch and squish myself close to you, “BUT there’s just something really funny about this one. I still usually close my eyes at the bloody parts, like the scene with Glen, even though I’ve seen this dozens of times and I know how it goes.” I shiver a little imagining the scene in my head, “It’s so gross!”

As the film plays my mind wanders back to our first date. I felt so nervous sitting with you this close on the couch and now, having just swallowed your cum and felt your tongue on my pussy, there’s nowhere else I’d rather be. I lean into your touches and take in your scent with a permanent little smile on my lips. After a while of just mindlessly moving my fingers back and forth against your arm I decide to be brave and bring up a topic that’s not very romantic or sexy, but I hope that maybe if I open up to you, it’ll show you that you can be comfortable opening up with me too.

”Eddie?” I look up and you from where my head is resting, “I just wanted to say thank you for not being too rough while I was sucking your cock.” My blunt choice of words cause my stomach to get all twisted in knots again, “I mean don’t get me wrong I loved having your hand in my hair but thank you for not just- you know, shoving it in and choking me.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

“Lucky for you, this is on my tier list of favorite scary movies,” I say with a grin and kiss your cheek before pulling you close and wrapping my arms around you. While we watch the movie, I can’t help but look down at you fondly on more than one occasion. Just thinking about how we met and where we are now, it makes me so happy to be here with you in my arms.

I kiss the top of your head and pull you a little closer before you’re suddenly looking up at me and thanking me for not being rough. I try to calm myself from the bluntness of your words, listening to what you’re trying to tell me. I frown a little bit, a little confused. “Of course I wasn’t gonna be rough. You said you have a weak throat, baby.” I bite my lip and let out a breathy chuckle. “And uh..I’m not trying to brag when I say this but I know I’m a lot to take so…I didn’t want to hurt you.” I blush a little as I chew on my bottom lip.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Blush covers my nose and cheeks when you say that you’re a lot to take in. My hand lifts up and rubs your clothed chest, I lift my head up closer to your ear, “It’s ok to brag handsome. Your cock is definitely brag worthy.” I tease you a little by ghosting my hand over your crotch before pulling back quickly with a little giggle.

“The uh, the only reason I say that is because I’ve been with guys before who think that they can…” I try to search for the right word, “stretch my throat or that I’ll get used to them after a while.” My fingers fiddle with the fabric of your shirt as I try to push back some painful memories, “One time Jackson shoved it in so hard I gagged and couldn’t stop coughing after.” A pause lingers on my lips, “He wasn’t very happy after that.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

My stomach tenses for a moment when you tease me before you suddenly pull your hand away. I snatch your hand playfully and pretend to bite your fingers before kissing your knuckles, chuckling along while you giggle before giving your cheek a kiss.

I frown once again when you tell me about the experience you’ve had with guys and scoff, rolling my eyes. Throats can’t stretch out like that. Everyone is different. Some people just can’t handle it if things get too rough like that. “He seriously got upset over something you can’t control? What a fuckin prick.” I shake my head. “I’m sorry you had to go through that, sweetheart. I promise I’ll listen and make sure to ask and that you’re comfortable with things before I do them. I-If you would want to continue doing stuff with me that is.”

I blush a little and trace patterns into the back of your hand that I’m still holding in my lap. “To be honest, I’d never gotten a blowjob before until just then.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

“You’re seriously the best Eds,” I wrap my hand around your waist and squeeze you in a side hug as I stay curled up beside you after listening to your comforting words. My arm finds a comfortable position with yours and I begin tracing my fingers along your forearm, “Of course I want to do that again.” I try not to sound too excited but my voice definitely raises with delight at getting to taste you again, “You made me feel so good Eddie.” I can’t help but notice that both of us can’t seem to keep our hands to ourselves and it makes me feel even closer to you now.

My bottom lip curls into a smirk when you tell me that I just gave you your first blow job. I truly wonder how blind everyone in this town must be because you are positively perfect. I lean up a little closer to your ear and lay kisses on your neck and earlobe with a hushed whisper, “Can I tell you something? It really excites me that I’m the only one to have had your big thick cock in my mouth.” My hands roam all over your arms and shoulders as I talk, “I hope I blew away your expectations!” I giggle at my own pun before my lips before for the bold chance I’m about to take, “I actually planned on asking you out on our third official date tonight. Halloween is coming up, so I thought it might be fun if we had lunch together by the lake before it gets too cold. I could paint and you could play guitar. Then we could come back here, watch scary movies, and eat way too much Halloween candy.” I look up at you with a hopeful smile, “What’d you say?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

It makes me happy when you tell me you want to do that again with me, feeling pride when you say I made you feel good. I squeeze you a little tighter to me and kiss the top of your head before you’re whispering in my ear.

I feel myself begin to get hard again at your words, your hands on my arms and shoulders. My hand splays out a bit more that’s on your hip, giving it a light squeeze and humming at your affections before you make a pun. I laugh loudly, letting my head fall back. “That was awful, baby. Don’t ever do that again or I’ll call the police.”

My attention is immediately piqued when you bring up going on a third date together. I raise my eyebrows and my grin widens at the prospect of spending Halloween, my favorite holiday, with you. “That sounds great, baby.” Then I take in your words about a lake and furrow my brows. “Um…what lake are you talking about?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I laugh along with you, losing myself in my thoughts for a moment after you laugh at my pun and tell me you’ll call the police if I do that again. I think about how much genuine fun I have when I’m with you. I love the sound of your laugh and our playful dynamic has only gotten better the longer I spend with you. I can’t help but feel like I was meant to come to Hawkins with Jackson, feel all the heartbreak he put me through, just so I could meet you.

When you agree to my idea, I light up. I can’t believe there was even still a part of my brain that thought you’d somehow say no. I reach up and playfully poke you in the tip of your nose, “Maybe I’ll get us matching costumes to dress up in, you can be a cop and lock me up for my terrible jokes, I mean I know I said I wanted to be a good girl for you but maybe I need a few reminders.” I wink up at you before burying my face in your sweater. I feel your hands around my waist and I let out a groan, “Fuck I just can’t help it! You got me so riled up even before I knew what your cock looked like! Remember that night on the phone? I got all nervous because I was kinda-“ I get all embarrassed and hide my face from you, “Thinking about what it might look like and my hand maaay have been in my pants.”

I giggle again before sitting up on the couch, “Ok! I promise no more horniness from me! I’ll be good for the rest of the movie.” I cross my heart and turn my focus back to the movie. After just a brief, but comfortable silence, I hear you speak asking what lake I was talking about, “Hm? Oh! There’s this cute heart shaped one I’ve been dying to paint, I think it was called Lovers Lake. It’s got a bunch of boat houses and things around it, I think it was just off Holland. Why do you ask?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

“Erica, you’re going to kill me,” I whine a little when you bring up my cock once again before you tell me you had been touching yourself before I had called you the night I went home after our date. Oh Jesus H Christ, this girl is amazing. “I did too,” I admit sheepishly. “But then I remembered that I had to call you so I stopped.” My face is probably bright red from admitting that but I don’t care.

I’m grateful when you say no more horniness because I know that if we continue I might just have to touch you again with how riled up I’m starting to get.

When we continue to watch the movie is when I ask you what lake you’re talking about, remembering that you had brought up a lake that you have been wanting to paint. As soon as you say that it’s heart shaped before even saying the name, my heart plummets to my stomach. There aren’t many lakes here, but I had really hoped that wasn’t the one you meant. Memories come flashing back of when Patrick burst out of the water and died the same way Chrissy did before I’m suddenly remembering Steve getting pulled into the gate and us going after him.

I try to remind myself that the gates are closed and El had killed Vecna, that everyone is safe and there’s no reason to worry but I can’t help but feel scared. Realizing I haven’t said anything in a bit, I clear my throat and shake my head as I give a small grin. “No reason. Was thinking you probably meant that one. It’ll be a pretty lake to paint.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

There’s a lingering pause as I wait for your response. I can’t help but notice a little increase in your heartbeat from where my head rests on your chest. Still your answer gives me no cause to worry so I nod with a pleasant smile when you say you think it would be a pretty lake, “Me too. I think it’ll be a lot of fun. I don’t work tomorrow so I’ll go grab some snacks and supplies and you can drive us there ok?”

I ask you a few more questions about the kinds of food you like so I know what to buy. Since I picked a movie we’ve both seen already we end up having some fun conversations through it, commenting on our favorite parts and I offer a detailed explanation on why this particular movie doesn’t scare me, citing that Freddy is just goofy and I can’t be afraid of a guy with a knife glove and a funny hat.

After the movie ends I lift up from the couch with a big stretch. I grab your hands and pull you up into a hug, “I had a lot of fun tonight Eds. M’really glad you came over.” I hug you once more and press up on my tiptoes to kiss your lips, “So obviously I don’t exactly have a guest room. If you feel comfortable I’d be more than happy to share my bed with you, but if you’d be more comfortable on the couch I can get you some pillows and a blanket.” My hands massage up and down your arms, “No worries either way! I want you to be comfortable wherever you’d rather sleep.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I nod in agreement when you make the plan, feeling uneasy about going back to the lake since I haven’t been back there ever since everything happened. I try to relax more as we talk about our favorite foods before I finally do with a content sigh as we watch the movie, having a good time as we talk about our favorite parts and chuckling at your reasoning as to why Freddy doesn’t scare you. “I will say the movies get sillier with every one they come out with. I can’t take it seriously whenever Freddy says ‘bitch’. He sounds ridiculous!”

I laugh and shake my head. Standing up from the couch easily, I wrap my arms around you and kiss your head as we hug. “I’m glad I came over too, sweetheart,” I mumble into your hair before you pull away and kiss my lips. I pout playfully when you pull away too quickly for my liking before you’re giving me a choice to either sleep in your bed or on the couch. I want nothing more than to sleep in bed with you, holding you close to my chest as I listen to you breathe evenly. But, if I have a nightmare like I do so often, I don’t want to worry you and have you asking questions I’m not ready for.

Reluctantly, I decide on the couch. “S’not that I’m uncomfortable, because I am. But there’s…a lot when it comes to sleeping with me and…I-I don’t think I’m ready for you to see that side of me yet. If that’s okay.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I notice a little hint of worry on your face as I look up at you pondering my question. I hope you believe me when I say that I really won’t feel differently if you’d rather sleep on the couch. I listen carefully as you start talking and my expression turns to a soft smile, wanting to assure you that I’m proud of you for being open with me about how you’re feeling. I lift your arms up to put them on my hips as I massage gently with my hands along your forearms, “That’s perfectly fine Eddie. I meant it when I said I would be patient. Whenever you’re ready to share that part of yourself with me I will listen, it takes trust to be able to open up to someone so completely and I hope to earn your complete trust one day.” I lift up on my toes to kiss you, the final punctuation on my words, “I’ll be right back, gotta get my handsome guy some blankets.”

I pull away from you, dragging my fingers wishing to maintain contact as long as possible before I head off to grab you a few things. From my bedroom I grab an extra pillow and an old Metallica shirt in case you want to sleep in something more comfortable than what you have on. Then I move to the closet and grab some blankets. When I come back into the living room with an arm full of cotton, I peak out from behind it with a grin. I tell you what I brought as I set it down, “If you need anything else, let me know. Make yourself at home Eds.” I walk over and plant one last goodnight kiss on your lips before turning and heading to my bedroom, “Goodnight Eddie.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I’m thankful for your understanding, knowing that you would. I give a small smile and kiss you back softly before you’re pulling away. My fingers graze your hips while you get up before you’re walking off. I let out a long breath when I’m alone, thinking about how you said it takes trust. I do trust you. But it’s hard to believe the things that I’ve seen when you haven’t seen them for yourself. I’m afraid that I would lose you because you’d think I’m being dishonest and like I’m joking with you.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

My body bristles with your question wondering anxiously if maybe you are upset that I didn’t tell you right away. I swallow hard as I bring both plates over to the table and join you, “I knew when I ran into you at the grocery store. Found out that day actually,” I sit down in the chair beside me, “I had been talking about how much I enjoyed your show with some of the girls at work and when I described you, one of the older ladies told me.”

I put on my best impression of her. My voice lowers and gets a gruff bitterness to the tone, “That boy’s nothing but trouble! You’d do well to stay away from him!” I decide not to give an exact interpretation of what she told me because you don’t need to hear that she accused you of multiple satanic fueled murders, “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. I guess it was kind of my way trying to show you that I didn’t believe them.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Taking in your words, it warms my heart hearing you tell me that you have known pretty much the entire time we’ve known each other and yet you don’t believe anything anyone has told you. I chuckle at the impression you give of the older lady before I’m taking your hand in mine and kissing the back of it. “I’m not mad that you didn’t tell me. I was planning to tell you in my own time. I wasn’t ready just yet and it sucks that people don’t know how to just…leave things alone. But thank you for…believing in me, I guess?”

I look down at our hands in my lap before I speak once again, “I-I’m not ready to tell you everything, but I will. I just ask for you to be patient with me.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I feel relieved when you say you’re not upset with me for not saying anything. Blush rushes to my cheeks when you grab my hand and kiss it.

“Take all the time you need Eds,” I follow suit by lifting your hand and kissing the back and continuing to hold it, “I know having dinner at home isn’t typical for a first date but let’s eat and continue that conversation that was so rudely interrupted. Oh!” I pull my hand away and go to the kitchen again. I stand on my tiptoes to grab two wine glasses, then a bottle of wine I had in the fridge. Digging for my bottle opener I talk with you, “Gotta have the whole experience right?”

After pouring two glasses, I set one in front of you and take a sip of mine. I take my first bite of food, “Mm! This is really good, even after being taken to go.” I giggle into my hand, “So I believe I was about to say I’d love to see the pretty colors around where you live so I can paint them.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

My smile widens when we go back to our earlier conversation at the restaurant, taking a sip of my own wine after swallowing a bite of ravioli. “I think you’d like it there. There’s a small lake nearby that I like to go to. The sunrise there is always so beautiful.” I tell you before I blush and clear my throat. “We don’t have to go there anytime soon. I know we’ve really just started…this and I don’t want to make you uncomfortable by inviting you over too soon.”

I realize I’m beginning to ramble and decide to change the subject. “You said you were writing a fantasy romance novel. What exactly is it about?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I can’t help but snicker a little when you say you don’t want to make me uncomfortable by inviting me over so soon, “Eddie you’re literally in my apartment right now.” But you bring up a good point. What is this? What are we after this even if it goes well?

My heart skips when you ramble and then change the subject, especially when you’re asking me about my book, “Oh well, it’s about a princess of a kingdom torn by war who falls in love with the knight sworn to protect her. It’s still a work in progress so she’s not told him how she feels yet but he’s about to leave at the king’s request to attempt to slay the dragon terrorizing the kingdom.” I realize I’m rambling and you probably don’t want to hear about this. Jackson certainly never did. He thought my books were weird, “Anyways, like I said. Still working on it but I’d love to get it published someday.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I’m enthralled with every word you say as I listen intently while I eat. Noticing you falter, I furrow my eyebrows in concern for a moment before I’m smiling once again when you say you’d love to get it published. “That sounds amazing! I love fantasy. Tolkien is one of my favorite authors. I’d love to read what you have if you’d let me.”

After your little story summary, I chuckle sheepishly as I say, “I’ve kind of always been a sucker for romance. It’s kind of hard to find people who want to incorporate that in their roleplay while playing dnd. But one year we had these two people in our club back in high school who liked each other and expressed that through their roleplay. I was rooting for them the whole time. Even scrapped an idea I had that would make a tragic ending for one of the characters just so they could be together.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

You saying you’d like to read my work lights a fire in my belly and it takes every bit of focus not to run and grab my notebooks right this second for you to read my rough draft!

I’m glad I didn’t because as soon as you say you’re a sucker for romance my heart melts, “That’s absolutely adorable! It’s kinda funny you mention that because I did play around with the idea of having the knight in my story die during battle and the princess vows to spend her life training to defeat the dragon that took her love away.” I can’t help but grin as we discuss these sorts of topics. My tone lowers a little and I can’t hide the shyness, “So did they end up together? The people in your campaign I mean.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Grinning at your question, I say, “I’ll have you know that the two adventurers are happily married in the story and also in real life.” Biting my lip, I look down at my nearly empty wine glass and swirl my middle finger around the rim. “They got married last year but I uh…I couldn’t attend unfortunately.” I let out a huff and a small, humorless chuckle as I shrug.

Not wanting to bring the mood down, I smile once more and stand up with my plate before grabbing yours when I see that it’s empty as well. “I think the least I can do is wash the dishes for you, huh?” I ask as I make my way to the sink.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

My heart breaks when you tell me you couldn’t go to a friend's wedding, I can only imagine what stopped you and I'm puffing out my cheeks like a chipmunk in frustration, “I’m so sorry Eddie. You shouldnt’ve had to miss something like that.”

When you offer to do the dishes I let you with a smile, “That sounds great.” I grab a dish towel from the stove, “You wash and I’ll dry ok?”

The domestic charm filling my apartment right now is palpable. We continue quiet conversation and after a bit we finish, “Thanks Eds.” Stepping up on my toes I kiss your cheek, “I’m going to grab a blanket since my legs are a little cold in this dress and I’ll meet you on the couch. You decide which movie we should start with ok?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

When you tell me your cold I interject, “You don’t have to wear that, you know.” I blush at the insinuation before continuing. “I just mean that you’re home and if you want to get comfortable I won’t mind.”

Once you’re out of sight, I shake my head at myself and roll my eyes. “Nice going, Eddie.” I criticize before walking over to where the movies are placed and pick up The Evil Dead to watch first, thinking that we could watch the scary movie first before watching something a little more lighthearted that could potentially make you feel better after watching something so scary.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I chew on my lip as I hear you say I could get more comfortable. I decide to test the waters and do just that. I slip in my bedroom and slide off my tights, then pull my dress up over my head. I decide to leave on my bra and panties but I change into my favorite sleep shorts and the Corroded Coffin shirt I made you. Since that night I gave it to you I cut mine a little bit more so it’s more of a crop top. When I lift my arms up over my head a sliver of my tummy shows. I check myself in the mirror on the back of my door, reaching up seeing how it looks and a wicked grin splits on my face. I can’t wait to see his reaction to this!

I head back out into the hallway between where my room is and my living room. To the right of my bathroom sits a small linen closet where I keep blankets. I’m thanking whatever god there is that my big fluffy blanket is on the top shelf because I can use this as a chance to tease you and see how you react to my change in attire when I try to reach it myself, “Eds? Can you come help me reach this down please? It’s on the top shelf and got pushed to the way back?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Pushing the tape in the VCR, I turn on the TV and press pause to wait for you before I decide to grab our snacks and place them on the coffee table in front of the couch. I start to feel nervous again, my thoughts from earlier swirling around and I look at the couch that we will be sitting on together. It’s when you call for me that I’m able to snap out of it. Walking over to where you are, my eyes widen and I nearly choke on air as I look at you struggling to reach the blanket. Only seeing the back of the black shirt, my eyes wander to the sliver of skin that is exposed from you reaching up, while your sleep shorts fit snugly on your hips.

My brain short circuits for a moment as I mentally fall to my knees, I feel a quiet whine get caught in my throat. I have to clear it so I can speak properly. “I-I’ve got it.” Cursing myself for stuttering, I get up close from behind you, trying not to press into your back as I reach up and easily grab the blanket for you. “Here.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Feeling your presence right behind me, almost hovering just out of reach against my back, my breath sucks in sharply. Even though you're not touching me I can feel the warmth and all it would take is me shifting backwards just a touch and I’d make contact with you. When you pull back and offer me the blanket I look up at you with a glazed expression. I want to grab onto your neck and kiss you until I can’t breathe while I run my finger through your curls. Instead I grab your hand, “Thanks Eds. The struggles of being short, come on, let's go watch that movie.” I lead you back towards the couch and I go hit play on the video that I see paused on the screen. Then I turn to you, “I’m excited to see your favorite movie, even if I might close my eyes during the scary parts. Promise not to tease me ok?”

Before I sit down my heart is pounding because this moment sets the tone for the rest of our movie night. Where will you choose to sit? I want to give you space in case you need it so I decide to sit in the corner against the throw pillows with the blanket over my lap, “Come make yourself comfy Eddie,” I give the space right next to me a pat inviting you to sit as close as you feel comfortable with.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

My heart stutters when I see the look in your eyes, wondering if you’re feeling the same way I am right now. An intense need to kiss you breathless washes over me, to press you against the wall and trace my hands up your sides. I’m thankful when you grab my hand as it distracts from my current desires. Chuckling from your words, I squeeze your fingers. “Don’t worry, baby. I won’t tease you too harshly.” I give you a playful wink with a grin.

Watching you get comfortable, I wonder if you’d want me to sit next to you or if you’d rather some distance. When you sit at the corner, it makes me think it’s the latter rather than the former, and my heart sinks a little before you’re patting the space next to you. Relief washes over me and I smile before I decide to sit down right next to you and place my arm around the back of the couch behind you. “Is this okay?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Happiness fills my chest when you choose to sit right next to me, then when you put your arm around behind me I fail to resist my urges this time. I adjust myself, sinking back into the couch until your arm is resting on me and your hand comes to sit cupping my shoulder. I turn my head, flushing even more with our proximity, and smile at you, “More than ok Eds.”

The movie plays and I find myself invested in the story, that is until the first scene where people start dying. I’m strong through the first few scary moments but then a particularly gory death with a shovel happens suddenly.

Shying away without thinking, my eyes slam shut. I twist and hide my face in your shoulder. I cling to the blanket harder and let a few little startled whimpers escape, “Oh that was so gross looking!” My toes curl and I keep my face hidden in your comforting arm until I hear the screaming stop. I talk into the fabric of your shirt where my face is still seeking refuge, “Is it safe again, because I’ll gladly stay right here if I’m going to see someone else get their head cut off!”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

It makes my heart flutter when you sink further into my arm, and I decide to scoot just a little closer to feel your warmth more while curling my arm around you a bit better.

As the movie goes on I try not to add my commentary like how I usually would when I show people this movie, wanting you to watch it and form your own opinion. I look to you every time something scary happens to see little reactions but suddenly you’re hiding yourself in my arm and my heart picks up speed. I instinctively bring you closer in means to comfort you, rubbing your arm up and down soothingly as I look down at you.

I decide to prolong this for a little longer, enjoying that you find comfort in me rather than being scared of me like nearly everyone else in this town. “Uh…hold on I’ll let you know,” I say while glancing at the tv to see that it indeed is safe for you to come back up but I’m enjoying this too much for it to end so quickly.

Slowly, I tuck some hair behind your ear, the tips of my fingers brushing against your cheek after as I look down at you intently. Leaning down, I kiss the top of your head before mumbling, “it’s safe,” into your hair.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Feeling your hand rubbing my arm soothes my nerves. Your warmth is so comforting and I want to spend all night in your embrace. The more time I spend with you I’ve learned that you are actually kind of shy, except when you're on stage. When you're performing you light up! I love watching you jump around and play with all your heart brings me so much joy. But this? This is something completely different and I want more. Your shy little touches and glances I catch you making make me so happy!

When you kiss the top of my head and tuck some hair behind my ear you pull me from my thoughts, “Thank you brave knight. I might require your services again, I wish I wasn’t so squeamish because the story about this book is actually really interesting!” I leave your side just briefly to grab my candy from the table, before quickly snuggling back up close to you, missing your warmth. I open the box and pop a few in my mouth before offering you some.

As the story progresses and the end is nearing, I need your protection again during the ending scene when all but the main character dies. When the screen goes black and the credits start rolling, I don’t want to move again. I nuzzle my head into your arm, “Ok I’ll admit. That wasn’t too bad. You were right, gory but a good story.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

“So you liked it then?” I ask as I get up to start rewinding the tape before turning to look at you. “They came out with a second one last year. Made it into a comedy too. It’s actually pretty good if you want to watch that together sometime.” I grin before I remove the tape once it’s fully rewound and put it back in its case.

Biting my lip, I look at the time as I fiddle with the case of The Princess Bride. It’s getting late and I don’t want to leave yet but I also don’t want to overstay my welcome. Releasing my lip from my teeth, I look at you. “Do you want to put on the next one?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I squish my legs together as you ask me if I want to watch the other movie with me. It’s late but I definitely don’t want you to leave yet. I still haven’t worked up the nerve to kiss your lips again since earlier. I nod with a big smile, “Absolutely Eds! Pop that in and get back over here big boy! You’re a great cuddler, like a teddy bear!” I lift my arms up from the blanket and reach out for you.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

My eyes seem to twinkle a little when you agree and tell me to cuddle with you again, not wasting any time and putting the movie in the VCR and pushing play before I’m making my way back to the couch. Feeling more comfortable, I decide to do what I wanted to do earlier. Sitting on the other end of the couch, I motion you over as I gently take your hand. “C’mere, sweetheart.”

Pulling you closer, I sit back and get comfortable before having you sit in my lap. I wrap my arms around your waist and hook my chin over your shoulder so I can see the tv. “This okay?” I ask once again, hoping that I haven’t crossed a line.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

My pulse quickens and anticipation builds as you take hold of my hand with that sweet voice telling me to come to you. I let your hand guide me to rest in your lap. Your hand around my waist sends shivers through my whole body! I feel your chin come to rest on my shoulder and your whisper in my ear asking if how we are sitting is ok. I nod really slowly and finally find my words, “Y-yeah, this is really nice.”

The opening sequence starts playing and at first I’m a little confused why your friend described this as a fantasy romance. But then as grandpa begins the story and we are introduced to the main characters. I’m immediately smitten with Westley and his sweet ‘as you wish’ voice. I lean back and try to look up at you, “Ok Robin knew what she was doing.” I chuckle a little, “This is perfect to follow up spooky demons from an evil book that possesses people.”

As the story continues, it reaches a point where the lovers were reunited. My heart pounds as we start to watch them kiss after being apart but I laugh when the little boy interrupts asking if there’s kissing in this story.

I feel a slight shift in the mood on that couch as we watch Buttercup and Westley kissing. I press against you and speak while keeping my eye on the screen. My voice is low, barely a whisper, “T-that kiss earlier tonight outside the restaurant felt really nice Eds.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I feel relieved when you tell me that sitting in my lap is nice, giving your side a light squeeze and I decide to kiss your shoulder blade softly as the movie starts. Robin was right. This is definitely something I love. It reminds me of earlier when I told you I’m a sucker for romance.

Chuckling at your words, I nod in agreement. “Rob is really good about that kind of stuff. I feel like Family Video got a lot busier because of her film recommendations to people. She’s great about reading others.” I tell you as I absently trail my fingers up and down your arm. “Okay, I already love the dynamic between Inigo and Westley,” I laugh. I bet they’re gonna become buddies later on.

Then it gets to the kissing scene, and my mouth goes dry for a second as my mind wanders to earlier outside of Enzo’s when I kissed you. Watching the way Westley holds Buttercup as they lie together in the grass, it stirs something in me and I swallow hard. Then you’re speaking, and you’re telling me how the kiss we shared earlier felt nice. It makes my heart stutter and I don’t realize I’m twiddling with the hem of your sleep shorts in a nervous habit until I’m already doing it. Stopping myself, I keep my hand on your waist and turn you a little so we can look at one another a little better.

My eyes meet yours but travel down to your lips for a long moment before they meet your eyes once more. “I-I thought so too,” I say honestly, softly. Bringing my hand up, I cup your jaw and run my thumb along your cheekbone delicately. “Is it…Can I kiss you again?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

My pulses races so fast I think my heart may burst out of my chest when you turn me to look into my eyes, cup my cheeks, and continue playing with the edge of my shorts mindlessly with your thumb.

The look in your warm brown eyes as you touch my cheek, asking for permission to kiss me. I’d give you every permission in the book just to look into those warm eyes again. I reach up and cup your cheek in my hand and nod slowly. Without pulling my hand away, the movie briefly forgotten, I lean up and whisper against your cheek, “Kiss me Eddie.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

My nose brushes against yours when you lean up and my eyelids fall shut as my breathing becomes a bit shallow from the anticipation before you’re telling me to kiss you. Letting out a breath through my nose, I trail my hand on your cheek to the nape of your neck as I hold you there. I let our lips brush together for a few moments, nudging our noses and briefly pressing my forehead to yours before I finally close the space.

And when I’m finally kissing you, the hand playing with your shorts finds home on your hip and I rub circles into your hip bone with my thumb. I give you tender pecks when I need air before I’m diving back in and slotting your bottom lip between my lips, giving it a very subtle suck before I’m letting it go and pulling you closer to me while my hand trails to the small of your back.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Your rough hands feel like silk against the back of my neck as you pull me in a guide our lips together, teasing me a little with kisses to the forehead and brushing your lips against mine. When you finally start kissing me I let out a whimper that I’ve wanted to release all night from being around you. Every touch you are giving me in this moment is soft and sweet. My muscles twitch and stretch feeling your thumb against the bare skin of my hip.

I want to adjust myself, up from the couch, straddle your lap and cup your face with my hand and I smother you in kisses! But I also don’t want to risk losing you by moving too fast so I take all the delicious kisses you give me and I repay you with my hands wandering along your shoulders and covered collarbones, along with more encouraging noises between our kisses. When I feel your mouth give my plump bottom lip a soft suck I feel my body melt into your arms, I can’t hold back the moan I let out when I feel your hand on my back, “Mm! Eddie, I could kiss you all night” My hands continue exploring your chest until-

A loud noise on the movie startles me and I feel myself jump! I look up at you wide eyed and giggle, a little embarrassed, “Sorry. I wasn’t expecting that.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I let out a rumbling hum with the noises you’re making. Knowing I’m the one causing those little noises makes my head feel fuzzy and I deepen the kiss and tighten my hold on you slightly. I want to kiss you until my lungs burn for air, until my lips feel like they might fall off, until the fucking sun comes up.

My need for you grows with every passing second and causes a slight tightness in my pants that I have to focus on keeping down in order not to freak you out. But then you’re moaning and it twitches, nearly throbs with interest and want and fuck I want to hear you make that noise again. Letting you talk, my lips trail to your jaw for a moment as you tell me you could kiss me all day. With a breath against your lips, I say, “Me too, baby.” And I’m about to dive back in when we both jump from the loud noise on the screen.

My chest heaves slightly as my heart races while I look down at you, my eyes hooded and slightly blown out from hearing you moan. Giving a chuckle and wide smile, I lean in for one more soft kiss. “S’okay, sweet girl.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I catch my breath after my swollen lips leave yours. I know I should stop because if I continue kissing you like this I won’t be able to stop. I wrap my arms around you and kiss your cheek, “This movie is really good. I’m almost glad that jerk interrupted our meal because it meant I got to have a romantic dinner at home with you.”

Before I get comfy again, I grab my candy and decide to see if I’m having the same effect on you that you're having on me. Instead of offering you one of the small chocolate morsels, I lay back in your lap against your chest, bring my hand up and I hold it delicately between my fingers. I slide it into your awaiting mouth, just the slightest bit of my finger touching your tongue. With a smirk I turn back to finish watching the movie.

“Ok this movie is probably my new favorite of all time!” I declare as the credits roll. I’ve had so much fun with you tonight and I don’t want it to end but I know that all good things come to an end eventually. As the credits roll I get up off the couch and lift you by the hands to join me, “I had a lot of fun tonight Eddie. So how would you rate your first date?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

My dick twitches in my pants once again when you feed me the candy, feeling your finger brush on my tongue and it takes everything for me not to give it a little suck before you’re pulling away. Fuck, she’s going to kill me. Is she doing this on purpose? But soon we’re watching the rest of the movie and I calm down as much as I can with my boner not going away anytime soon. It’s been so fucking long, sue me!

With your declaration, I grin and squeeze your side. “It is really good,” I agree. “I’m happy you enjoyed it as much as I did.”

Taking your hands and standing when you pull me up, I look down at you and smile when you tell me you had fun. “I did too, sweetheart.” When you ask me to rate my first date, I let out a breathy chuckle before humming in thought, shoving my hands in the back pockets of my jeans as one eye closes as I think. “Um…9 out of 10.” I say with a nod and grin. “Could’ve gone without the beginning, but it did lead to a great end.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I nod with a smile, “I’d agree, although,” I grab your hand and pull you closer to me. My body pressed right up against yours and I smirk a little when I feel the tightness in your pants against my leg. Pride fills my chest knowing that I had to be the cause of that, “I liked defending your honor! Like the brave knight in my story. You’ve been so kind to me Eddie I couldn’t just let them say those horrible things.” I bring my arms up around your neck and pull you into a hug, “I really want to ask you to stay but you’re too important to me. I don’t want to take things too fast.”

I think about how Jackson and I’s relationship began hard and fast in high school. We slept together almost immediately and the more I think about it, I wonder if we hadn’t done that, would I have stayed with him so long. I’ve never experienced dating as an adult until now and all I know for certain is that this, “I really like you Eds. Getting to know you these past few weeks has been the most fun I’ve had in my whole life. I’d love to go out like this again sometime. Maybe we could try a different restaurant outside of town or maybe one day we could take a road trip into the city and I could show you some places I used to love. I want to do everything, experience everything, with you.” I lean up on my tiptoes to kiss your lips, “I want to show you that I meant it when I said I’d wait until you were ready to tell me about everything.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I briefly freeze up when you press yourself on me, hoping you don’t notice that I have a hard on pressed against your thigh, but your smirk tells me you do and my cock twitches yet again when I realize you’re teasing me and it isn’t bothering you one bit. I have to clear my throat so I don’t let out a grunt from the slight friction. I want nothing more than to press you up against the wall and kiss you, touch you, feel you around me, but I don’t want to do anything you aren’t ready for.

Especially when you say you don’t want to take things too fast. I can agree. I’ve never had a relationship before, but I have experience in the bedroom. All of it was just sex, and I don’t want that with you. I want to actually be with you and sex will eventually be a thing that happens for us, an intimate moment we can share together when we’re serious.

My heart flutters when you tell me you like me for the second time tonight before you’re saying you want to experience everything with me. It takes my breath away and I let my eyes fall shut when you kiss me. I keep you close, pressing my forehead to yours as I run my hands up and down your arms. “I like you a lot, Erica. No one has ever…” I let out a small sigh and decide not to finish that. “Thank you for today. For believing me and inviting me into your home. I can’t wait to do everything with you, sweetheart.” When I pull away, it’s with a small tug to my heart. “I should get going. I have a long drive and if you continue to be so damn sweet to me I might just stay.”

I grab my jacket, taking your hand after shrugging it on before I’m taking your hand and leading you to the front door before putting my boots on. Once I’m facing you again, I lean down and give you once last departing kiss. “I’ll call you when I get home, okay?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

“Be safe!” is the last thing I say before you leave with the promise to call me when you get home. I fall against the back of my door after locking it and let out a dreamy lovestruck sigh. You’ve stolen my heart and I don’t want it back.

Finally I lift myself up with a yawn and go to rewind the movie, clean up the candy wrappers, and head to bed. I bring the blanket we’d been laying with because it still has a faint layer of your scent lingering in the fabric.

Sleep doesn’t come as easy as I hoped because I find myself distracted with thoughts of how good it felt to feel your hardness against my thigh. I can’t get the feeling out of my mind and I spend too long fighting back the urge to slide my hands under my waistband and into my panties. I can feel my wetness starting to soak through and I know if I dipped my fingers in right now they’d be soaked, it wouldn’t take long at all to make myself- fuck it!

As soon as I picture your thick calloused fingers being the ones to dive into me I can’t hold back any more. My hand slides down my hip and into my panties, circling little swirls around my clit imagining it’s your ringed fingers teasing me. My breathing gets heavier and I feel my face flush with warmth. As I thought it doesn’t take long and I feel myself getting close just from a little teasing when my phone rings!

My hand tears out from beneath the blankets and I try to catch my startled breaths before answering, “H-hello? He-hey Eds. Did’ya make it home safe?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

The drive home is long, too long for my liking. In the beginning when I first moved to my new home and started making these trips for work, I felt like I would never get there from how far it felt, but as time went on I got used to it and the drive feels shorter and shorter every time. Now? It feels like it’s the beginning all over again. All because of a certain problem I have going on in my jeans. And I can’t make it go away because the only thing that is coming to my mind right now is you. Your eyes, your lips, your kiss. And the more I think about you, the worse it gets. I have to palm myself through the thick material of my jeans just to give myself a little relief while I’m on the road.

Finally, home, the first thing on my mind is getting rid of this fucking ache. I groan when I sit down in the recliner in my living room, too pent up to make it to my bed, and start unbuckling my belt. Once the zipper is down, I slip my hand in and palm my hard cock through my boxer briefs and sigh in relief, dropping my head back against the back of the recliner as my eyes fall shut. My thumb slides up and down the underside of my shaft through the thin material, humming contently.

My mind drifts to you, wanting to picture your hand instead of my own, but once I think about you, I realize I need to give you a call to let you know I got home. With a heavy sigh, I stop touching myself and grab my phone off the hook on the wall next to the recliner and dial your number.

It takes a few moments, but I soon hear your voice on the other end and…is she out of breath? With all of the thoughts that have been running through my head for the past hour, my cock twitches at the sound of your breathy voice filling my ears.

It was, of course, something innocent, though. Maybe she took a shower and ran to the phone when she heard the phone ring? Oh god, don’t think of her in the shower right now! Realizing I haven’t said anything, I clear my throat. “Hey, baby. You okay? You sound like you just ran a marathon.” I chuckle.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

When I hear your voice teasing me about being out of breath my coherency crumbles. Is it really that obvious? Does he somehow know what I was doing? I stammer out a vague string of sounds that only slightly resemble words, “Oh, well um, no, I was just-“ as I’m embarrassing myself, I twist in the bed and with every word adding more tension to the already stretched phone cord. With one more pull, the ringer comes tumbling off my nightstand and crashes to the floor.

“Shit!” I mutter, dropping the phone into the blankets. Crawling over to the edge and I lean down to pick it back up. Lifting it by the mangled twisted cord, I put it back on the table and then in my haste drop the receiver, “Damn it!” I say louder this time so I know you are probably worried about what the heck I’m doing, if you haven’t already hung up that is. Scrambling to get my brain back where it belongs I pick up the phone again, “Wow um well that was embarrassing. Sorry Eds, I dropped the phone.”

I still haven’t answered you when you asked if I was ok. I laugh nervously, hoping you believe my story, “Um, no, no marathons. I was uh in the other room and I guess I was just excited to talk to you again. I mean I know it’s only been an hour but I was just— how are you? Did you get home safe?” My head falls into my lap as I sit cross legged on the bed. Well, chock this up with my most embarrassing moments. Not only was I touching myself thinking about you but now I'm doing a horrible job at not making it weird after.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I’m confused as to why you suddenly sound flustered while you try to explain, and it doesn’t help the way my horny brain spirals. Maybe she was in the shower? Why does it have to be the shower, you perv?! Or maybe she was… No, no way. She couldn’t have been doing the same thing I was before I called her.

My train of thought is halted and I’m startled when I hear a crash along with you cursing before everything sounds like it’s underwater. “Erica?” I don’t get a response and I sit up a bit straighter in the recliner, suddenly feeling worried. Then the crashing sound is a bit louder, like you had dropped the receiver and my heart races. “Erica? Hello? Are you okay?” I try to keep my voice level, not wanting to sound panicked.

All these what-ifs start playing in my mind, but I know none of it should be possible. El killed Vecna for good, she closed the gates for good, nothing like that would happen. But then I start thinking about earlier at the restaurant. What if the guys followed us to your place? What if they plan to treat you like how they treated Steve and Robin and Dustin and everyone else for being friends with me? I’m beginning to feel panicked until I’m suddenly hearing your voice again.

Sighing in relief, I run my fingers through my hair before letting my head fall back against the recliner. “S’okay, sweetheart.” And I immediately begin to feel better when you start to ramble your explanation, my smile growing when you say you were excited before you’re cutting yourself off and asking me how I am. I chuckle, “I’m just fine, sweet girl. Yep, I made it home in one piece.” Except for maybe a few pieces of my heart I left with you, but I don’t say that. “How’re you?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I sit up straight again and lean back against my headboard when you say you got home safe and ask me how I am, “I’m great actually, the best I’ve been in a long time.” I feel a little more brave when you’re not right in front of me so I lower my voice a little and get comfy again, “I hope I don’t make you uncomfortable by saying this but I’ve never met anyone who treats me the way you do Eddie. I’ve always been the weird shy girl who listens to devil music, you make me feel like I can be myself. My ex always made me feel like I was a bother anytime I talked about my writing so,” I take a deep breath and a yawn escapes with it, “Hearing that you wanted to read my story really made my night. I should get to bed. I’ll see you again soon, ok? Goodnight Eds.” I blow you a kiss through the speaker.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

The next few days seem to drag on forever! I pass the time at work, a few of the ladies there notice my distant, dreamy eyed stare and when I tell them I met someone special who I’m having dinner with, they’re all eager to know who he is but I just smile and go about my business. The last time I mentioned you they all told me horrible rumors and I won’t give them the chance to speak badly of you again.

That morning I called Enzo’s Italian restaurant and made a reservation for 2. I’ve never eaten there, which is part of the reason I chose this place. I didn’t want to go anywhere that I already had memories of, at least not for our first official date. I want tonight to be special for both of us.

After getting off the phone with the restaurant, I realize just how long it’s been since I’ve been on a real date. The pleasant buzz of anxious excitement and the butterflies in my stomach dancing give me a high that I want to feel all the time! I’m not really as nervous as I thought I’d be. It’s you. My new favorite person to be around. You make me feel so safe and comfortable. I have nothing to be nervous about, I know you’ll put me at ease with just your smile. Nothing could possibly go wrong!

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Friday can’t come soon enough, my thoughts on you almost constantly now. I feel a bit nervous because, not only is this a big step for me with opening myself up and branching out since ‘86, but this is my first actual date! I want to make sure I do this right.

Wednesday, I call up Steve for advice, asking him what would be a good idea to do to impress you for a first date. He immediately started asking me questions, “You’re going on a date? Really? With who? Is it that girl you asked me about a few weeks ago?” And I just rolled my eyes. In hindsight, I should have thought better to ask for dating advice from Steve Harrington. I’m sure he could be romantic if he tried, but the stuff he was saying sounded kind of ridiculous and very…high school.

Thursday comes and I’m over at Wayne’s, sharing a beer on the couch on the deck of the trailer. I guess my nerves have been showing. “No one has been giving you trouble lately, have they?” He asked me after a moment of silence. I shook my head. “No no just…Okay please don’t make this a big deal but…so there’s this girl…” and when I start talking about you, I can’t stop. It’s hard to read Wayne’s expression before he finally asks, “Are you serious about her, son?” And I let out a breath, needing to think about that for a moment before agreeing easily. “I think so…I haven’t really felt this way before. I don’t want to mess things up.” “Then be yourself. Seems like she likes you for you, Ed. There ain’t nothin’ wrong with you, so why change it for a date?”

Wayne did give me a bit of pointers, but he just kept saying to be myself. And all I could think about was where being myself got me last time.

Friday is finally here and I try not to panic, try not to be too nervous. I know that once I see you, I’ll start to feel better. But then I start to think about something that hasn’t been on my mind since you had asked me out. Where are we going to dinner? Is it a popular place? What if someone sees me? And it just keeps going. All day, I go back and forth on giving you a call and canceling, feeling too scared to be out in Hawkins with the risk of someone seeing me and ruining everything. I even called Steve! Telling him of my anxieties. He says he understood why I was so scared, but it had been two years since everything happened and maybe I could give this a try. That everything would be okay.

His final question to me is what helped my final decision. “Is she worth the risk?”

That’s how I find myself walking up to your apartment door at 6:50PM that night, wearing black jeans with no holes, a dark gray button up with the top three buttons undone and sleeves rolled up to my elbows, and a small pickings of flowers in my free hand while I use the other one to knock on your door.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

As soon as I get out of the shower and start trying to decide what I want to wear, something goes wrong. I stand there staring into my closet at the few dresses I own, fighting back tears. All of them were either gifts from my ex or things that I bought specifically to go places with my ex and my brain starts to spiral, wondering if maybe I rushed into things with you. It’s only been a few weeks and yeah Jackson had been distant for months before that but I’ve only been single for a short time. Unable to bring myself to grab anything to put on, I sit on my bed naked with the phone from my nightstand in my hand.

I called up the only friend from the city that I’ve kept in contact with and I expressed my concerns that I may have rushed things to her. She does a great job at bringing me back down, “You know I never liked Jackson anyways! Maybe this new guy, Eddie, was it? Maybe he can make you happier than you ever were before. There’s no law that says you have to stay single for a certain amount of time after a break up. I mean maybe there is in that backwards ass town you moved to, but I’m sure this metal boy you met would love to break the rules!” She can’t see my smile but she can hear my laughter! “As for what you should wear, girl, those are just pieces of cloth! Who cares who or why you bought them!” I laugh into the speaker again. Her words warm my heart, “You’re right, thanks! I’m just going to go have dinner with him and see where it goes from there.”

After my call with her I feel much better. I hop off the bed and finish getting ready with a pleasant pep in my step. After finishing my hair and make up I revisit my closet with fresh eyes. I immediately grab my favorite red dress that hangs perfectly in all the right places, definitely making my chest look good when paired with the right bra. I give a mischievous smile to the empty room as I stare into the mirror, this’ll make Eddie lose his mind. My heart pounds when I hear you knock on my door. I give myself one last look over and walk over to open the door.

The sight of you standing in my doorway, holding flowers in one hand makes my heart melt. You look so cute! I take in your appearance, trying to be as discreet as possible and not look like I’m just standing here ogling you but I can’t help it! With your sleeves rolled and the few top buttons of your shirt undone, you're already making me come undone and you haven’t even said anything yet. I love looking into those big beautiful brown eyes of yours.

I smile up at you,“Hi Eds, you look really nice.” I pull a little at my dress to avoid immediately pulling you into a hug. The muscles in my core tightening with excited nerves seeing you for the first time in a few days. I hold the door open inviting you in, “Do you wanna come in for just a minute while I grab my jacket and find a vase for those pretty flowers you brought?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I chew on my bottom lip as I wait for you to answer, wondering if I look okay enough for wherever we’re going. I don’t have time to think about it too much though because you’re soon answering the door and standing in front of me. I try not to let my eyes wander but…fuck you look so good in red. Swallowing hard, I realize you’re talking to me and I raise my eyebrows.

“Oh uh…yeah, sure, no problem. Here.” I hand you the flowers, leaning in and giving your cheek a soft peck before I step inside. Looking around the apartment briefly, I call out to you from where I’m standing, still by the door now closed behind me. “You have a nice place. S’cute.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Reaching my hand out to meet yours as I take the flowers you offer me, our hands brush and send tingles through my skin. I don’t have much time to linger on that though because you quickly move in to kiss my cheek and I feel my face heat up, “Thank you Eds, they’re lovely.” You sound a little nervous and I want to help you relax so I grab your now free hand that you held out to me with the flowers and I gently pull you inside and close the door behind you.

I walk towards my kitchen and try to find something cute I can put these flowers in. I hear you compliment my place from the other room. I briefly wonder if you’ve ever been on a date before, you seem so nervous. I find it incredibly endearing and I want to just smother that cute face of yours in kisses. Maybe tonight after dinner I’ll get that kiss you wanted to earn.

I call back to answer you as I step up on my tiptoes to check the top cabinet for a vase, “Thanks! You can come in, you know. No surprises anywhere I promise,” I laugh and can’t resist the urge to tease you a little, “I put all my deep dark secrets away before you got here. Also don’t worry about your shoes or anything. I don’t care too much about things like that.” My efforts to find a vase come up short and I end up using a clear wine bottle I had washed and readied for recycling. I add some water and arrange them nicely before rejoining you in the front, “Tada! Not exactly traditional, but I think they look perfect!” I place them on the center of my dining table and grab my newly purchased leather jacket from the back of the chair. After I gave yours back I definitely decided I needed one of my own. I flip my hair out as I swing on the jacket and grab my bag, “You ready for some pasta handsome?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Walking a little further in, I look around and see the little additions you made that look like they came from you, smiling softly to myself as I start to relax a bit. Your apartment is cozy, making me feel at ease and comfortable.

Hearing you say you put away your deep dark secrets, I chuckle and shake my head. “Don’t have to hide anything from me, sweetheart.” My heart swells when you set the flowers on the dining table and say they look perfect. Admiring you as you walk back over to me, I look over the leather jacket and think about how much it suits you. I still like how you look in mine more, but this is a close second. It’s your question that has me pause, though. “Pasta?” I’m back to chewing on my bottom lip and feeling a bit tense. “A-Are we by chance going to Enzo’s?” I haven’t been inside before, but I know that it’s a popular place that a lot of people who aren’t my biggest fan go there. And I try not to show just how nervous I am. I shake my head and give a smile. “It’s great. I like their breadsticks,” I say so it doesn’t sound like I’m reluctant to go, not wanting to ruin this date with you.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I nod yes when you ask if we are going to Enzo’s, I watch you trying to gauge your reaction. I hope I didn’t pick a bad place, I haven’t even asked him what he likes to eat. I relax a little when you say you like their breadsticks. Hooking my hand around your elbow I smile up at you, “That’s good. I’m ready whenever you are Mr Rockstar. Let’s go!” Not letting go of your arm until we get down to your van.

But then as I’m taking my spot in the passenger seat a memory pops into my head of that first night we ran into at the grocery store, “Oh shit! You’re not vegan are you? I didn’t even think to ask before I made a reservation! I’m sorry! I should’ve asked before I picked a place,” my rambling continues, “I just thought it would be fun to surprise you. We can go somewhere else if you’d rather. I’ve never eaten vegan food but I’m willing to give it a shot.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I raise my eyebrow at your question, wondering what could give you the impression that I’m vegan before I remember us running into each other at the grocery store a few weeks ago. Chuckling, I start the engine of the van. “No, I’m not vegan. That’s really sweet of you for asking, though. That was just something I stumbled across and thought I’d give it a try. It was really good actually.”

Reaching over, I pinch a small part of the skirt of your dress and give it a light tug before letting go. “This is really nice. You look beautiful. Not that you don’t look beautiful all the time, I just…the dress is nice.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

“Oh good!” I let out a relieved sigh, “I would’ve felt really bad if I made you feel uncomfortable in any way about the place I chose.”

My heart skips and my thighs press together when you pull at the fabric of my dress and call me beautiful, “Oh! Thanks,” my voice lowers a bit and I brush a strand of hair behind my ear, “This is one of my favorites so it means a lot to hear you say that.” I look up at you from the corner of my eye and I reach up my hand slowly to do the same for you, toying with a strand of your curly hair between my fingers, “You look really nice too Eddie, the rolled up sleeves is a good look,” I run my hand up and down your arm feeling the fabric in my fingers, “You look good all the time too.“ I don’t want to make you uncomfortable so I pull my hand back and try to resume the small talk.

“So I saw this place a while ago but I’ve never been, I’m excited for tonight. I kinda haven’t stopped thinking about it since I asked you.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I blush when you compliment me back before you’re taking your hand away. Wanting to feel your touch for just a little longer, I reach over and gently take your hand in mine, giving your fingers a light squeeze before I’m placing it back in your lap and setting my hand back on the steering wheel as I drive.

Hearing you say that you’re excited for tonight, that you haven’t stopped thinking about it, it means a lot, makes my heart flutter as I glance at you briefly before I’m looking at the road again. “I’m excited too.” Clearing my throat, I continue, “to be honest…this is kind of my first date.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

The way in which you gently squeeze my fingers before respectfully placing my hand back down makes me realize something, especially after I hear you comment that it’s your first date. I'm going to tell you after dinner that I’ve heard the rumors about you and I think they’re all malicious lies! Over the time we’ve spent getting to know one another I know in my heart that there’s no possible way you could’ve done the horrible things that people have told me about you. I’ve wondered if you know about them, I mean from what I’ve been told there’s no way you don’t know what people say about you. I’ve also wondered if you’ve thought about whether or not I’ve heard these horrible things. Tonight I want to tell you how I feel.

“Well good sir I am honored to be your first date,” I grab your hand back from the steering wheel and into mine again. Holding it as I talk, “You’re kinda killing it to be honest. I’d never have known that a catch like you, hasn’t been on a date before.” I laugh at a memory and start telling you the story of my first date with a chump I knew in high school, “He took me to a drive-in after homecoming. Within 5 minutes of the movie rolling he tried to stick his hand down my pants so I smacked his hand and poured my drink in his face.” By the time my story finishes we are pulling into the parking lot of Enzo’s and I’m still holding your hand.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Hearing you say that you’re honored and that I’m killing it, gives me a little more confidence. “Thanks I…really don’t want to mess this up,” I chuckle lightly, nervously. When you hold my hand again it leaves my heart racing in the best way and I absently play with your fingers as I drive and listen to you.

“Who does that?” I ask with a scrunched up face. “Well, you did say it was in high school, so yeah. A douchey teenage boy would do that. Good job throwing your drink on him. That’s pretty metal.” Pulling into the parking lot, I turn off the engine and get out of the van, looking around briefly to see that it’s pretty tonight since the parking lot is nearly full. Letting out a breath, I walk over to your side and open the door for you and hold out my hand for you to take.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

“Such a gentleman Eddie,” I slide out of the passenger seat. The smile on my face growing bigger and bigger by the second. I immediately take your hand in mine again and hold your ringed fingers tightly. Even going as far as to lean into you as we walk up to the door.

Outside there’s a small group of people waiting and inside the waiting area it’s full with every seat taken. I give your hand a little squeeze and tug you along to the hostess stand, “Don’t worry. I called ahead.”

Once we navigate our way to the front of the crowd I take charge and speak with the hostess, “Hi! I called and made a reservation for Erica.” She looks through her papers and gives me a smile, “Give us about 5 minutes. You can wait in here or outside.”

I turn back to you with a big grin hoping to show you hope happy I am to be here with you on what I hope to be the first of many dates, “I’m not a big fan of crowds so I requested a booth near the back, I thought my rockstar who does all his grocery shopping in the dead of night might also appreciate that.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Feeling your hand in mine and you leaning into me brings me a lot of comfort. I lace my fingers with yours and give your hand a gentle squeeze as I look down at you before we’re walking inside. Seeing all the people concerns me but I try to keep calm, just thinking about you and how I’m finally on a date with you after having a crush on you for a few weeks now. I’m here with you and that’s what matters.

I grin at you at your words, leaning down and giving your head a kiss in gratitude. “I do appreciate that, sweetheart. Thank you.” My voice is soft and sincere. After a few minutes, we are escorted by the hostess. I keep my head down a little to try and draw less attention, my heart racing as we walk further and further into the restaurant before we’re being seated and I let out a quiet breath of relief.

“Would you like to start off with anything to drink? We have quite a selection of wine,” the waiter says when he gestures to the menu. I look at you with raised eyebrows. “Get anything you want, yeah?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I blush a little when you tell me to get anything I want. I like the feeling of you spoiling me. I look briefly at the menu and then back to the waiter, ordering a glass of wine.

The waiter leaves after taking our drink order. I try to look at the menu but I can’t help notice that you look a little nervous. From under the table I reach out with my foot and touch your leg, “You ok Eds?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Feeling your foot under the table and hearing your question as I look down at the menu, bringing it a tad closer to my face than necessary, I look over the menu to you. “Hm? Oh um…yeah, sorry. It’s just a big menu,” I lie easily with a chuckle. “I can’t decide. What are you thinking of getting?”

I’m thankful when the waiter comes back with a basket of breadsticks and I thank them before looking at you. “These are the breadsticks I was talking about. I haven’t been here before but a friend of mine has and he had leftover breadsticks and let me have one. They’re really good.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I pull my foot back and decide to just let my concerns go. Maybe it was just my own nerves. You look happier when the waiter drops off the bread so I relax a little too.

I reach over and lift one out of the basket, taking a bite, “Mm! You’re right, these are delicious! If this is just the bread I’m sure the food is going to be so good.” I finish my bite and then point to the menu, “I’m definitely getting these raviolis.”

As I’m talking to you I catch movement from the corner of my eye on the other side of the dining room. A group of 4 guys was just seated on the opposite side of the dining room from us. Normally of course this wouldn’t be significant. Except when I look over briefly, one of them is staring right at us. I don’t recognize any of them, they must be looking at someone else. I flick my eyes between him and the menu a few times before focusing on your comforting eyes, “What about you? What are you thinking about getting?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Smiling at your reaction, I'm just glad to see you enjoying yourself before I see someone staring at the corner of my eye. Glancing over, I try not to freeze up when I realize I went to school with them, that they were part of the same group Jason Carver was in and was part of the group that Andy later took charge of and chased me out of Hawkins. Thankfully, I don't see Andy with them but that doesn't mean they won't do or say anything.

"Uh..." I tear my eyes away from one staring at me and look back at the menu, my heart pounding hard in my chest now. "I was thinking about getting the same thing," I quickly say, not even really reading the menu anymore as my anxiety grows with every passing second.

This is it. Everything is going to fall apart before it could even start, before I could tell you everything myself. They're going to say something, and you're going to hate me. You're going to look at me the same way everyone here looks at me.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

The waiter comes back to our table, “So did you two decide on dinner?” I smile and nod, “Yes, we’re both going to have the ravioli please.” He scribbles that down on his paper and walks away.

I fidget with my fingers a little, unsure of myself all of sudden. It’s been so long since I’ve been on a date with someone like this. On the rare occasions Jackson and I went out to dinner we’d just talk about our day or mundane other shit. I want to use tonight to get to know you better but I have no idea how to start. Maybe I should just ask you. I take a sip of my wine opening that it helps loosen me up a little, “So, I know you’re an aspiring rockstar, you mentioned on the phone the other night that you sometimes help out fixing cars? That’s really cool. What else do you do for fun? I want to know what brings you joy!”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I’m jostling my leg underneath the table and I try not to bite the mail of my thumb from how anxious I’m feeling, but I’m glad when you ask me a question, smiling weakly when you say you want to know what brings me joy. “Yeah, I um…I play dnd. I’m usually the dungeon master and write up the campaign that my friends and I play together. Been doing that for a while now.”

I glance over at the guy once more before looking back at you and placing my chin on my hand to try and give you my attention. “What about you, sweetheart? What brings you joy, hm? What do you do for fun?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I sit up eagerly in my seat when you mention playing dnd, “Really? I’ve always wanted to try that! I think it would be really good inspiration for the fantasy romance book I’m writing.”

I prop my elbows on the table and lean in to try and be closer to you when you ask me what brings me joy, “Hm? Besides talking with you everyday? Reading and writing,” I laugh, “Guess that’s pretty predictable considering I work in a library. I also really like painting, that’s one thing I’ve loved about moving out here to the country that I didn’t have in the city.” My chin comes to rest in my palm, “Right after I moved here I fell in love with all the natural colors. Sometimes I’ll go sit by the lake and paint for hours!”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

My eyes light up when you mention you’re writing a fantasy romance book and I grin, briefly forgetting about the people looking our way. “I actually wanted to ask you about that. Your writing I mean. What is the story about?”

Then you mention you paint and my heart melts as my grin widens. “You should see where I live, sweetheart. Prettiest colors you’ll see.”

I didn't notice that the guy who has been looking at me got up and walked over, making me jump and tense up in my seat a little when he speaks. “This your next victim, freak?” My heart plummets then and I immediately pale and feel sick. He looks to you, “Are you okay? You’re not here against your will are you?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I’m just about to say that I’d love to see where you live sometime, especially if it means you’d sit outside with me in the pretty fall foliage. Maybe we could have a picnic while you play guitar and I paint…but my beautiful daydream is cut short by this prick who wouldn’t stop staring at us, now having the nerve to interrupt our date. My blood boils when I hear him call you a freak and even more when I see your face go pale.

He asks me if I’m ok or here against my will and glare up at him with my head still in my hand, “I’d be better if you’d kindly leave us alone.”

He huffs out through his nose and shoves a hand in one pocket, “You're clearly not from around here so allow me to inform you just who you’re sitting with.” He looks at you with such disgust I want to smack that look right off his face! As soon as he starts talking I know exactly where he’s going with this and my lips curl when I realize my plans to tell you I already heard the rumors has now gone out the window.

He steps closer to me. I can smell his cheap cologne and it makes me sick, “This freak here killed 3 people two years ago and got away with it—“

Before he says anything else I take another big sip of my wine and turn in the booth to face him with my arms crossed, “Yeah? Did you ask him if he did it?”

The guy looks surprised that I didn’t immediately believe him, “Are you deaf? I said he killed 3 people and got away with it. Why the hell would I ask him anything?”

I shrug and roll my eyes, “Well where I come from there’s two sides to every story and the way I see it is there’s not a single person in this whole damn town who’s bothered to get Eddie’s side of the story. Don’t you know a person is innocent until proven guilty? So I ask again— did you ask him if he did these things? Do you have actual proof? Or are you just mindlessly spreading misinformation?”

Before he can answer our waiter returns to see what the commotion is about. I greet him kindly and uncross my arms, “Would you mind making those dinners to go please?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

My eyes widen as I watch you stand up for me, feeling confused as to why you’re not treating me like all the others before something clicks when I realize your words. When you said “…not a single person in this whole damn town…” She already knew? She’s already heard what people have said? But she’s still on a date with me?

I start to feel a lot of emotions, but most of all shame and confusion. Shame for this to have happened. Confusion because I’m not quite sure why you’re still wanting to be around me.

After you ask for the dinner to be to-go, I abruptly get up from my seat and walk out, feeling on the verge of a panic attack. When I make it outside, I make it to the side of the building and breathe heavily, my hands trembling and my vision spotting. I shut my eyes tightly and try to do the breathing exercises that my therapist had taught me before I stopped seeing her.

“Fuck,” I wheeze out as I’m finally able to catch my breath, opening my eyes once more to see that my vision is back to normal and I let out a long sigh in relief. I decide to take a cigarette out and light it up to help ground myself, my hands still trembling slightly as I smoke.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

My heart sinks when I see you get up so abruptly and hurry out of the restaurant. A lot happens at once. The waiter leaves to go tell the cooks to pack our food to go, the prick who’d interrupted our date tried to keep talking, and a few others in the dining room started having hushed conversations about what had just happened. Feeling entitled to add their two cents about it.

I push my way out of the booth that guy had been blocking and despite my deep fear of making a scene or public speaking, I make my position known to the whole room, “Shame on all of you!” My voice is level but firm as I point in the direction you just headed, “That man has been nothing but kind to me since the moment I met him! He looks out for my safety, he makes me laugh, and hasn’t once made me feel uncomfortable or unwelcome around him! Now I don’t know the whole story either— but I can say without a hint of doubt that Eddie Munson wouldn’t hurt a fly!”

The waiter returns quickly with a to-go bag, “Thank you. Here,” I grab my purse and go digging for some cash because like hell I am making you come back in here. We can go finish our date in private, if you still want to that is.

After slamming the cash down on the table and grabbing our stuff, I turn and flip the whole room the bird and walk out in the direction you’d run a few moments ago. As I walk through the crowded room an anxious thought consumes my brain. What if you’d run out because you didn’t like that I was fighting your battles for you? What if I got too protective and I scared you off?

As soon as I step outside in the cold night air I look around for where you’d gone. My heart pounds when I don’t immediately see you, scared that my fears might be true, I hurry around to the side of the building and see you leaning against the wall smoking. I calm down a bit and walk up to you slowly. My hands fidgeting with the plastic bag.

“Eddie?” My eyes are locked with yours the whole time, “I’m sorry you had to find out this way that I’d already known what people say about you,” once I start talking I can’t stop. The words just keep falling as my voice picks up speed. I’m frantically ranting trying to get all my thoughts out at once, “I wanted to tell you after dinner. I hope I didn’t make you uncomfortable with anything I said or how protective I was but it’s true! I don’t believe any of it! I obviously don’t know the whole truth but I know in my heart there’s no way! You’re so kind and gentle and make my heart feel all fuzzy when I’m around you, I like you so much Eds! I just know there’s no way you could’ve—“

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Once I’ve calmed down some, I try to think a bit more clearly about what just happened. She knows. And yet she stays. It sends my heart racing and I wonder just how long you’ve known what people say about me. Has it only been a few days? Or the whole time since I’ve known you?

My head whips in your direction when I see movement at the corner of my eye in brief fear before I see that it’s you and…she’s still here? Of course she is! Did you not see the way she stood up for you? But then you’re talking, and you’re telling me to my face you don’t believe what people have told you, what that guy just said.

My heart picks up speed with adrenaline then as you continue to talk, telling me how much you like me and I can’t take it anymore. Tossing away my cigarette, I take a gentle yet firm hold of your face in my hands before I’m leaning in and pressing my lips to yours in a kiss.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I’m so focused on my frantic words that I don’t realize you lifted up off the wall until you’re cupping my face in your hands and kissing me! A real kiss! Not the friendly pecks on the cheek or top of my head, an I don’t just want to be friends, kind of kiss!

I can feel your lips on mine, they feel divine. My eyes flutter closed and I almost drop the bag in my hand letting myself melt into you, kissing you back, drinking in the scent of the cigarette you’d been smoking along with the distinct scent that is you. The taste on your lips is making my brain go fuzzy, I want to taste it all the time. I reach my free hand up and grab hold of your arm, bracing myself to not fall over. I don’t want it to end. I want to spend the rest of my life kissing you but sadly my eyes flutter open and blink up at yours. My whole expression is light with a smile and I let out a little chuckle. I try to say something but I can’t find the right words, so I set the bag down and wrap my arms around you, nuzzling my head into your chest.

After a moment I look up at you refusing to let go, “What’d you say we go finish our date at my place?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

My thumbs brush along your cheeks as I kiss you, capturing your bottom lip between my own lips and sucking ever so subtly before I’m pulling back the slightest bit and pressing soft, tender pecks against your lips.

It takes a lot of willpower for me to pull away from you, wanting to kiss you until I can no longer breathe, but I let out a low, shaky breath as I finally do pull away from you. My eyes are slightly hooded as I look down at you, heart still pounding hard in my chest in case I may have overstepped but you’re soon hugging me and I let out another breath in relief.

My arms wrap around your middle and I kiss the top of your head, letting my lips linger there for a moment before you’re looking up at me and offering to finish our date back at your place. “Do you want to rent a movie to watch after?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I nod into your chest, pressing my body into your frame because I don’t want to let go just yet. I commit the feeling of our first kiss to memory and let out a dazed sigh as I let you go, “That sounds great Eds. Let’s get the hell out of here!”

As we walk to your van I miss your touch so badly that it doesn’t take long for me to slip my arm behind you around your waist and hug your side as we walk. We stop at the passenger door. Before you can walk around, I squeeze your side indicating I don’t want you to go yet. Instead I turn you to face me, “Eddie? Before we get inside that van I need to say something. I don’t want you to feel pressured to tell me anything that you’re not ready to talk about, ok?”

I accentuate my point by reaching between us and tugging lightly at the fabric of your shirt with my fingers, my eyes falling to the small area of scarring that I can see. The tips of my fingers just barely grazing the exposed skin, “I may not be the most patient in all aspects of my life, but for you? You’re worth all the patience in the world.” I step up on my tip toes and kiss your lips again, “Now let’s go get a movie!” My serious tone lightens a bit with a big cheesy smile, “Nothing too scary please…unless of course you promise to hold and protect me the whole time.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Being in your presence, feeling you pressed into my side with your arm around me, it’s grounding. I’m still shaken up, but I’m putting what happened on the back burner to worry about later. All that matters right now is you.

When you get my attention and turn me to you, I look down at you intently as you talk. It gives me a lightness inside me when you tell me you don’t want me to feel pressured to tell you anything until I’m ready.

Stiffening the slightest bit, I feel your fingertips brush against my scarred skin but I don’t stop you, smiling down at you when you tell me I’m worth all the patience in the world. I don’t have time to react when I feel your lips on mine, blinking down at you and letting out a small breath through my nose. “Okay,” I say softly before leaning down to capture your lips in mine once more before pulling away. “We can watch whatever you want .” I let you know once we’re in the van and driving off to Family Video.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Once we are driving towards the video store I want to try to bring the smile back to your face so I turn up the mixtape playing through the speaker and dance in my seat while singing along with the songs. I lean in across the center console into your shoulder and look up at you with stars in my eyes hoping that I made you smile.

After we pull into the parking lot of Family Video and walk towards the entrance, I grab your hand as we walk. I lean up towards your ear and whisper, “I hope this is ok. I kinda like the idea of people seeing us together.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I chuckle when I notice you dancing in your seat before you’re leaning over the console. Quickly, I kiss the tip of your nose before I’m looking at the road again and soon pulling in to Family Video.

When you take my hand, my heart stutters and I look down at our interlocked fingers before you’re telling me you want people to see us together. It makes an even bigger smile appear on my face and I squeeze your hand lightly before I’m opening the door and walking in the store with you.

Steve and Robin are talking at the counter before they look over to us to greet us until they notice me and you holding hands. Robin’s jaw drops for a moment before she’s closing her mouth. Steve has a knowing grin and looks at me. “So I take it the date is going well?”

I clear my throat and rub the back of my neck, blushing a little as I look down at you briefly before looking back to Steve. “You could say that.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

As soon as we enter I start thinking about what kind of movie I want to watch with you and my eyes start wandering to the new releases section of the store before I realize you're talking with two of the workers.

I can only assume they are friends of yours with how you are talking, Especially when the guy asks if our date is going well. I blush a little at the thought that you might’ve talked to your friends about me.

I keep a hold of your hand and wave to them with the other, “Hi! I’m Erica. It’s really nice to meet you.” The looks I get from both of them suddenly make me feel like an outsider. Like you’re all in on some secret that I’ve not been included in. They don’t look mean, but instead they look cautious, as if they don’t trust me, which is fair I suppose. They never met me before. I try not to let my nervousness show on my face, “Are you friends of Eddie’s?”

The girl with cute choppy short hair comes out from behind the counter and shakes my hand with a smile, “Hi Erica. I’m Robin, that’s Steve. It’s nice to meet you too. Follow me and I can show you what’s new. I’ll help you pick the perfect one!”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I watch Robin drag you away to the new releases before I’m looking back at Steve and putting my hands in my pockets. “Things started off a bit…shaky…” I admit with a side as I walk closer to the counter and lower my voice so only Steve can hear. “One of Andy’s buddies was there and kind of spoiled everything. I thought…I thought that that was it. That she was gonna leave, you know? After hearing what he had to say. But she stood up for me. She already knew what people were saying. But she said she doesn’t believe them.”

Steve raises his eyebrows at my words, glancing over at you with Robin before looking at me again. “That’s great, Eddie. She seems really sweet. I’m happy for you.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Robin lets go of my hand when we get to the back corner. She looks over my shoulder and then whispers, “So you and Eddie huh?” I blush at her words, “What’d you mean? I mean yeah we’re on a date and he kissed me—“

Her smile splits wider, “He looks really happy. Happier than I’ve seen him in years,” she turns and pretends to be showing me something. Her voice lowers, “So listen. I don’t know what he’s told you but he’s uh- he’s been through a lot. More than anyone should ever have to go through in a lifetime.” The way she speaks is full of love and admiration. I can tell the two of you are close friends, “Thank you for telling me but I told him he doesn’t have to share anything with me until he’s ready. Don’t worry Robin, he’s already done a lot for me in just the short time I’ve known him. I promise if he gives me his heart I’ll treat it kindly.” I look up at her with a smile.

She stares wide eyed at my sudden confession and then talks a little louder, “Here this is his favorite.” She goes to grab a cassette and places a copy of Evil Dead into my hands. She also grabs a copy of The Princess Bride, “This came out last year and it’s got a good mix of romance and fantasy. The perfect way to that dork’s heart.”

I cling to both tapes and smile at her, “Thanks for your help Robin!” I hurry back over to join you, “Ready Eds?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Steve and I talk a little more before I see you come back over with the tapes and I look down at them, grabbing The Evil Dead and grinning. “This is my favorite. It can be a bit silly at times. It might be a bit gory so if you don’t want to watch it, I’ll understand.” I see the other movie in your hands and furrow my brow. “I haven’t seen that one before.”

“You’ll like it, I promise.” Robin says with a grin and a wink. I chuckle and ruffle her hair playfully. “You usually are really good about picking stuff that I’ll like.” I look at you once more and smile, lightly nudging your arm. “Do you want any candy or anything?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

You’re already the sweetest thing in the room, my brain so delightfully supplies in hidden response to your question. Outwardly I just smile and nod, “I’d love some chocolate. It might be cliché but desserts are kinda my weakness.” I think briefly back to our encounter at the grocery store when I went out specifically for ice cream. I grab a box of snow caps, “These were always my favorite as a kid! You should get one too and then we can share.”

After collecting our snacks and movies, I wave to Steve and Robin, “Bye! It was really nice meeting you.” Even though it’s not at all what I had envisioned for the night so far, I’m having a really great time with you and my heart is fluttering at the thought that shortly you’ll be in my home with me. I'm starting to wonder how you like to relax when you watch movies at home. Will we be maintaining that unspoken boundary still by leaving some space between us on the couch? Or can I cuddle up with you like I really want to? Did that kiss, and the few chaste ones that followed, change our dynamic? Can I keep kissing you, lord I want to so badly! Get so distracted by one another that we forgo the movie and I end up in your lap as we take one another’s breath away in a messy make up session? My thighs together with want as I take my spot again in your passenger seat. My hand finds your leg, I give it a little squeeze, “Your friends seem really nice,” I pull my hand away tug at my skirt, “I’m having a really good time Eds.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I look around before I pick up a pack of m&ms and grin, setting everything down on the counter and paying for the movies and snacks before we head out back to the van after saying goodbye.

When we get outside, I start to realize something. I’m going to your apartment. We’re gonna have dinner and then watch a movie together. On your couch, in close proximity. Thinking about it, I want nothing more than for you to sit in my lap as the movie plays, wrapping my arms around you while my chin rests on your shoulder. Stealing kisses on your cheek. Would you let me kiss your lips more? Let me turn you around in my lap so you’re straddling me and kiss you until our lips are raw? My hands on your pretty thighs while I feel you pressed against my-

I clear my throat abruptly to stop my train of thought, swallowing hard. My body briefly stiffens when you give my leg a little squeeze and I briefly wonder if I had said everything out loud. Until you’re saying Robin and Steve seem nice. And I thank whatever deity there is that I didn’t. Watching the way you tug at your skirt though, I internally groan. God, you look so good tonight. “I’m having a great time too, Erica.” I let you know honestly, biting my lip briefly before deciding to just say it. “I-I really like you. I’m happy we decided to do this.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

My heart swells to epic heights when you bite at your lip and say that you really like me. I’d been so nervous about whether or not my crush was one sided but now I have no more doubts. The way you just confessed liking me and the way you held my face just a short time ago outside the restaurant make me feel things I haven’t felt in years. Even when we were good Jackson never made my stomach do flip flops the way you do with just a single touch of your hand or glimpse of your smile. I keep tugging at my dress out of happy nerves, “I really like you too Eddie.”

I insist on helping bring some of the things in from the van as we make our way back up to my apartment. The whole time my heart is pounding and my skin tingling at the thought of inviting you in for dinner and movies.

When your car is out of sight, I look back down at the numbers that decorate the back of my hand, admiring your cute handwriting. Without thinking, I let out an outburst of “Yes!” as I raise my fists in the air in victory before I’m quickly composing myself and clearing my throat. I got her number. I got her fucking number! Things really are looking up, aren’t they? I walk back into the bar with a bit more pep in my step, not caring when the guys start to tease me and simply embracing it. I just want to get home so I can call you. 

Once I am home, I start to feel a bit nervous about calling you, wondering if you’re even still awake yet since the drive home is nearly an hour long for me. Then I start to spiral, thinking that maybe you gave me a wrong number but every time I look back at our interactions I think things seemed great and like that wouldn’t be something you would do. I decide to just go for it, taking my phone off the hook and dialing your number.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Every minute that passes in silence fills me with insecure thoughts that I may have been on the completely wrong page, hell maybe we weren’t even reading the same book! I try to console myself, no. He was definitely at least interested in being friends, there’s no way I was misreading that. Maybe the heart I added on his hand was too much and I scared him off? With that single what if? my mind spirals. What if he got into an accident? What if someone who spreads those nasty rumors came to the bar and jumped him? With my head a spiraling confused mess, I eventually fall asleep on the couch. 

The phone ringing wakes me with a jump! My first sleepy thought is who the hell is calling me at this hour but then I remember why I fell asleep on the couch and not in my bed. I quickly, maybe a bit too eagerly, pick up the phone and try to hide the sleep from my voice, “Hello?” It doesn’t take me long to realize it’s you. “Eddie? Are you ok,” I let out a small yawn, “I was worried something happened.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie.* :☆ﾟ. ──

I don’t have time to process if you are going to answer the phone while it rings because you answer it within the second. Hearing your voice on the other end brings that smile back to my face and I sit down on my recliner that I have near the phone, plopping myself down as I begin to relax and let my previous worries melt away. When I hear you yawn and tell me you were worried about me, my heart flutters and I have to clear my throat before I answer. “Worried about me, huh?” My voice is dripping with tease as I flirt. “Sorry, sweet girl. I live a bit far from work. I don’t really live in Hawkins.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Your deep flirty voice coming through the receiver right into my ear is messing with my sleepy brain something fierce! I only sort of process what you are saying, mostly I hear sorry sweet girl, “I think you should make it up to me for making me worry about you.” I yawn deeper this time, “My dreams were not being kind to me. Will you sing me a song Eddie so I can have better dreams when I fall asleep again?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie.* :☆ﾟ. ──

I internally groan when you ask me to sing for you, letting my head fall back against the recliner. Fuck, she is so adorable. All I wish for is that you were here so I could hold you as you fall asleep in my arms while I sing to you. My heart is in my throat. “What would you like to hear, baby?” My voice comes out deeper than intended.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Your voice lowers to depths I didn't even know possible, d-did he just call me baby? Maybe I’m just hearing things, I really should go back to sleep before I say something embarrassing, “W-will you sing that first song from your set tonight? That one was my favorite.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie.* :☆ﾟ. ──

The way you stutter let’s me know that calling you baby did in fact have some kind of effect on you. Although I didn’t mean for it to come out, wanting to keep that in the depths of my heart for a while, I’m not mad that it slipped. Although I do wish that I could’ve seen your reaction, hearing you like this, it tells me everything. 

“I can do that for you, sweetheart,” I let out more softly, clearing my throat before I begin to sing to you.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Hearing your song fill my brain has me both wishing you were here singing to me as you hold me in your arms, I’d love to fall asleep on your chest, and so so thankful that you're not here to see the goofy little smile on my face as I quite literally melt into the couch. The already curly phone cord twisting idly between my fingers. I start humming along without even thinking about it, losing myself in the song that you are now absolutely singing just for me. My eyes fall shut as I picture what you might look like singing to me right now, “Hmm, you sound so good Eds. Thank you,” I let out a little squeak with this last yawn, my words starting to slur together, “wanna keep talking with you but m’fallin asleep…w’you call me again sometime? D’know if I’ll make it till next week without hearing your voice again.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie.* :☆ﾟ. ──

The nickname you just gave me echoes in my brain on a loop and I let out a huff of air as I try to keep myself together. I’m ruined already. You’ve done it. “Y-You’re welcome, Erica.” My voice gets stuck in my throat for a second and I have to pull the phone away and clear my throat before I’m talking again. “I’ll call you whenever you want me to, sweetheart.” I then decide to be a little brave with my next words, “You sound so cute right now. All sleepy like this.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

My heart bursts with warmth and the blossom growing inside my chest sprouts a leaf when you call me cute. I let out a sleepy giggle, “Hmm, you’re the cute one Eds! Those big brown eyes? So pretty…I have to work on your surprise tomorrow so m’gonna go to bed ok? I’ll see you in my dreams.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie.* :☆ﾟ. ──

"And you'll be in mine," I promise you softly. "Goodnight, sweetheart." It takes me a second to hang up but I finally do. Not moving from the couch, I stare up at the ceiling of my home as I place a hand on my chest over my heart. It beats fast and I could swear I can feel it skip when I picture your smile in my head, picture your blue eyes that stare into mine without malice. "Take it easy, Munson," I mumble to myself, trying to remind myself not to dive in so quickly but you make it so easy.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Over the next two weeks we see each other a few more times and talk on the phone nearly every night. Learning one another’s favorite movies and debating which Metallica album reigns supreme, It’s definitely “Ride the Lightning”. I managed to convince you to leave your house one night because I needed more cereal so we continued our late night grocery shopping traditions. Finishing your surprise takes me longer than I thought but it was well worth it because I can’t wait to see your reaction to what I made for you and your friends! 

Getting ready for my third Corroded Coffin show I decide that tonight I’m going to take you up on that raincheck to drive me home. I get dressed, deciding to spice up my usual wardrobe with some ripped up black tights that show glimpses of my thigh tattoos peaking through. Carefully packing the gifts I’ve been working on in a bag before locking my apartment and heading out towards The Hideout. 

Coming here has become such a routine part of my life that I can’t believe I ever felt like an outsider here. I know that you’ll already be working behind the bar because you mentioned during one of our calls that you always work before your shows. I wave at you with a big smile when I come in and head right to the bar. 

“Hi Eds!” the nickname I gave you in my sleepiness definitely stuck. Especially after I said it in person for the first time and loved your cute reaction. I hold up the bag containing your surprise, “Are you busy or can I give you your gift now? Are the guys here yet? I have theirs too! I can’t wait for you to see it!”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie.* :☆ﾟ. ──

During the next two weeks of us getting to know each other, talking with you every night and seeing each other at the bar or when we go grocery shopping together, you’ve become one of my favorite people. My feelings for you just grow more and more and at times can feel a bit overwhelming and scary because of everything that’s happened to me over the past couple years. And even before what had happened in ‘86. I learned how cruel people can be and to keep my walls up and people at a safe distance so I wouldn’t get hurt. It’s becoming exceptionally harder to do that with you. 

You had said you were coming out tonight. I don’t feel as nervous being around you as when we first started hanging out and talking, but the nerves are definitely still there, just a lot less noticeable. When I see you walking up, I try not to let my eyes wander but those tights! Oh those tights look so nice! I beam when you get closer and greet me with the nickname I’ve come to love so much, seeing the bag in your hand and my smile widens. 

“Yeah, they’re here! You wanna come backstage for a second?” Before I’m walking over the end of the bar and walking up so I’m next to you. “Here, let me give you the VIP treatment.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Every time I see your face my affections for you just multiply. They have gotten so high I wonder if they will ever hit a maximum level, I highly doubt it. The butterflies in my stomach still flutter and flit about when I hear you say my name or call me sweetheart. You’ve become my favorite person to be around and I hope you enjoy our time together as much as I do. As soon as you meet me from the other side of the bar, I pull you into a surprise hug. My nerves still get worked up every time I touch you but I’ve definitely gotten more bold since we first met, loving your reactions every time I catch you off guard with my affections. I’m still not 100% sure that my feelings are mutual but even if we are only ever friends, that’s all right with me because your company is so important to me. 

The bag rustles against your back as I wrap my arms around you, “Ooh! VIP, lead the way Mr. Big Rockstar!”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie.* :☆ﾟ. ──

Even though you’ve hugged me on more than one occasion or have taken hold of my hand or touched my arm, it still surprises me each time that that is something you want to do, something you want people to see. I love it each time it happens, too. And I hug you back easily. 

Chuckling at your words, I reluctantly pull away from the hug but keep my arm around you as I lead you backstage. “Right this way, m’lady.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I’m screaming internally when you keep your arm around me as we walk backstage together! My body instinctively leans into yours as we move past the tables and towards our destination. My pulse races with every step thinking about how people might see us and assume we are a couple— goddamn it do I want to be yours so badly! 

Once backstage, I greet the rest of the band with a smile, “Hi boys! Long time no see.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie.* :☆ﾟ. ──

Gareth, Jeff, and Barry are talking as they get ready to set up before you and I walk over. Barry immediately smiles when he sees you, “Hey, Erica! It’s good to see you. How’ve you been?” 

Jeff and Gareth on the other hand are a bit surprised to see you again since they hadn’t seen you since the other week. I talk about you from time to time, but I don’t say much because I don’t want to be grilled when I’m not sure what’s going on myself. Regardless, they greet you kindly. 

“Erica says she has something to give us.” I tell them before looking down at you and squeeze your side. “So what is it, sweetheart? What’s this surprise?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Your squeeze to my side sends shivers through my body. I suck in a deep breath trying to hide how you just made me feel. I distract myself by telling Barry I’ve been well. 

I open the bag I brought and pull out a black shirt that I made with your band’s logo. The letters turned a golden auburn color from where I hand painted each letter and line with bleach and then added a few distressed, splash details to the rest of the shirt. I hold it up to show you, “Tada! I made you all matching shirts. I also put your names on the back, see,” I turn the one in my hand around to show where I also bleach dyed the words ‘Gareth-Drums’, “Here! This one is yours!” I walk it over to him, then Jeff, then Barry and finally you. 

“Here Eds, this is yours!” I hold up a shirt that looks a little different than the others, I cut yours into a v neck and on the back where I wrote Eddie-Lead Guitar, I dotted the I in your name with a little heart, “I also made myself one with just the logo.” I offer it to you and look up at you with wide, hopeful eyes, “Well? What’d you think?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie.* :☆ﾟ. ──

“No way!” Gareth exclaims when you give him his shirt, smiling widely with excitement. “Dude, these are sick! Did you paint it with bleach?” 

“Holy shit, man!” Jeff and Barry thank you for the shirts as they look at them, flipping over the back so they can see their names. “Thank you, Erica! This is so cool of you!” Jeff says sincerely as he looks at you with a wide smile. 

I’m in awe when you first present the shirts and start handing them out, my heart flipping in my chest as it swells and warms. I can’t believe you would do something like this for us. This is one of the nicest things someone has ever done for me in a long time. When you walk over to me with my shirt, I take it from you slowly, looking over the details before I flip it over to see my name and notice the heart on the “i”. It takes everything in me in that moment not to grab you and kiss you. Instead, I look to you with something soft and loving as I ask, “You really made us these?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Hearing all the words of thanks and gratitude makes me blush, especially when I look into your eyes and see such a soft glow staring back at me, “Yeah, sorry it took so long! I wanted them to be perfect, so it took me a lot longer than I thought it would…one night I stayed up so late working on them that I’m pretty sure I got high from the all bleach fumes,” I chuckle, “But I’m really happy with how they turned out and I’m even happier that you all like them!” 

I grab at your hands where they are still holding the shirt, “Well? Go try it on!”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie.* :☆ﾟ. ──

Chewing on my bottom lip, I decide to go on impulse for just a moment, leaning down and give you a quick kiss on the cheek before I pull away to look into your eyes. “Thank you. Really. This was so kind of you.” I tell you before I’m walking to the bathroom to change, my heart beating hard against my chest at what I just did and I hope to god I didn’t fuck anything up. 

The guys are pretty surprised at what just happened before they’re following me to go change as well, giving me back pats and wolf whistles and teasing me. I just brush it off and roll my eyes, but it does make me feel better and make some of my anxiety go away. I’m shrugging off my jacket before I’m taking off my original shirt I had on today, and pulling the shirt you made me over my head. I notice mine is a v-neck immediately and look at myself in the mirror. It’s a bit wider and deeper than the v-neck I had worn the other week, so it shows some of my scars and I bite my lip as I look at myself in the mirror. I feel torn, because I love this shirt and I don’t want you to feel bad if I didn’t come out with it on, but I also don’t want you to see my scars. I know you’ve seen the one on my neck and jaw and you haven’t asked me about it yet, but this draws more attention and brings back too many memories. 

Jeff noticed my hesitance when he sees my scars and pats my shoulder. “Hey, it’s okay. I’m sure she’ll understand if you don’t wear it.” I look at him through the mirror before looking at myself again. I know I can’t talk about everything with you. At least not right now. I’m not ready to open up that part of my life to you just yet, but I am beginning to trust you, and maybe letting you see this is a good beginning. 

“That’s okay,” I assure him with a shake of my head and give him a small smile. “I’m fine. Promise.” I grab my shirt and jacket and walk back out backstage to show you how the shirt looks. “So what do you think? I think it looks pretty metal, if you ask me.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

My attention is locked on watching you toy with your bottom lip, enchanted by the way it looks between your teeth, my brain so delightfully pictures being the one to bite at your lip. Girl get yourself together! I’m so focused that I miss the subtle changes in your body language as you lean down towards me. I have no time to process what just happened because in the span of just seconds the lips I’d just been staring at, lowered and planted themselves for just a moment on my cheek before pulling away again. 

He kissed me. Holy crap he just kissed me! My lips part in shock just a bit and I look up at you with a glazed expression. I want to answer you, respond somehow! But you’ve left me completely and utterly speechless! Before I can reclaim the oxygen in my lungs, you’re already gone from my view. All of you are gone within minutes presumably to go change and I’m alone standing there in a state of blissful shock! 

Alright calm down! I try to bring myself back down from outer space. It was just gratitude, don’t read into it too much! But the others simply said thank you- they didn’t kiss my cheek. There's no way that didn’t mean something! 

Thankfully you return quickly so I don’t have too much time to overthink things. As you approach me I take in the sight of you wearing my creation and I can’t help but notice new areas of exposed scars on your skin. At first I worry that you might be upset with how I cut it. You looked so good in the one I’d seen you wear before so it never occurred to me that you might not want it cut like that. Whatever those scars are from I hope one day you feel comfortable enough with me sharing the story. I think you look fucking incredible and the little peak of scars showing honestly looks pretty fucking metal to me. I could stare at you all day. I realize that’s exactly what I’m doing, “It looks real good Eds. Most definitely! It’s the most metal shirt in the history of the world!” I step in closer towards you and grab both your hands in mine, “And the man wearing it is pretty fucking metal too if you ask me.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie.* :☆ﾟ. ──

I look down at myself, eyeing the scars for a moment before I’m looking at you again and giving a warm smile. “Thanks, baby,” I say softly. Since slipping that out the other week when I first talked to you on the phone, I hadn’t called you it since, making sure I call you every other endearment I have been, instead of that, but I just can’t help myself right now. I want to call you baby. I want to kiss your cheek, your lips. “Where’s yours? You said you made one for yourself too.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Baby. First the kiss. Now that delightful word is back. I want to hear you call me your baby everyday. I want to be yours and only yours so badly. I need to know if this crush is one sided or not. And there’s only one way to find out. 

From where my hands are still holding yours I reach up really slowly along your forearms and grab your elbows. I press up on my toes towards you. My hands never leave your arms as I press up and lean in to kiss your cheek as you did mine. Your skin feels like heaven on my lips. My feet immediately bring me back down to earth and I look up at you with a warm smile, “How silly of me, I’ll be right back handsome” 

I reluctantly let go of your elbow and grab the last shirt in the bag before heading to the bathroom to change, my heart pounding in my throat the entire way there. 

Once I’m in the bathroom I collapse against the door with the happiest smile on my face.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie.* :☆ﾟ. ──

I’m not expecting you to kiss my cheek like I did yours, my eyes wide and my breath catching in my throat. I’m frozen when you pull away and leave to change, left a bit speechless and when the guys return they see you gone and me in shock. 

“Everything good, Ed?” Gareth asks as he walks over and places a hand on my shoulder. “Hm? Oh uh…yeah. Yeah everything is great.” I can’t help but let out a breathy chuckle before I’m looking at everyone with a crooked grin.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

In the bathroom I change from the shirt that I’d had on and pull the matching fabric over my head, giggling to myself as I replay that quick kiss over and over again in my head. 

For my own shirt, I also cut a v neck dip, showing off the beginnings of my chest. Then I cut up the bottom so that I could tie it at my waist. I roll the sleeves and tie the red flannel I’d been wearing around my hips before I head back out to where you’re waiting. 

As soon as I step out of the bathroom I walk right over to you, doing a little spin, “What’d you think Eds? I was thinking about writing #1 fan on mine.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie.* :☆ﾟ. ──

I turn when I hear you come back, looking you over and my brain short circuits for a second at just the sight of you wearing a shirt that says “Corroded Coffin” on it. And it just makes it better that you made it. Swallowing hard, I only nod for a second before Barry is elbowing my side and I finally answer. “Yeah- yes. Should definitely write that for sure.” I then feel a bit shy as I add, “You look really good.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Wrapping my hand around my back I lean in a little, creating a flirty bend with my hips. My nose crinkles when I smile up at you, “Good! I wanna look good for my favorite metal band. I’m really excited to see you play again Eddie.” I address the others, “I’m glad you all like them too!” 

I look up at the clock on the wall, “I’m going to go get a drink, it won’t be as good as you make Eds, but I’m sure it’ll be tasty,” I wink at you before adding, “I’ll see you on stage.” 

I head to the bar and see that Tracy is just clocking in. I wave at her, “Hey!” We talk for a bit while she makes my drink and I flush as her comment that I’ve been in here a lot lately, “Well, I mean I’m a big metal fan and there’s not a lot of places to listen to good music around here.” 

She smirks, pouring the mixture into my glass, “Hmmm, are you sure it isn’t that you’re a big Eddie fan?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie.* :☆ﾟ. ──

Once the stage is set up, we walk on and I start to introduce ourselves like I do every time. “You may have noticed these awesome new shirts.” I say as I make sure mine is visible. “I’d like to thank Corroded Coffin’s number one fan for making these for us. Thank you, Erica. It really means a lot.” I send you a wink and grin widely. “Are you guys ready to get your shit rocked?” 

I play like I do whenever I know you’re watching, more energy, more confidence, and a lot more flirty. And my eyes always seem to find you no matter how many times I look away to engage with the rest of the bar. 

After a few songs, we go into a song we haven’t played yet but one you had told me was your favorite when we were on the phone one night together. I look at you as the song starts to see your reaction.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

My face lights up like a Christmas tree when you call attention to me and the shirts I made for you. I hide my face in my hands but peak up at you from between my fingers. Seeing your smile though always makes me feel warm and fuzzy, I pull my hand away and give you a little wave. 

While I sit there listening to your music, watching you play, sipping the drink in my hand, I realize how content I am. I haven’t felt this in a long time. I’m reminded of how easy everything was with my ex in the beginning, but then towards the end everything became a battle or felt forced. With you? Just being in the same room with you relaxes my brain and I’m starting to accept the fact that I can’t hide my feelings for you anymore. I want to spend everyday feeling just as I do now. Appreciated, cared for, and happy. Whether you realize it or not, just by talking with me about the things we both enjoy and making me smile with your laughter or your music, I’ve fallen for you. Hard! 

As if you could read my thoughts you look over at me and begin a new song. I instantly recognize the melody. One night I mentioned to you that N.I.B was my favorite Black Sabbath song. Now watching you sing about falling in love with the devil has my stomach in knots and my heart pounding. I look up at you with the softest doe eyes, I didn’t even know I was capable of feeling like this. During your guitar solo, my lip makes a home between my teeth and I smile around it, before the song comes to an end I blow you a kiss—with it the promise that after your show I’m going to ask you to drive me home and ask you out on a date with me.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie.* :☆ﾟ. ──

My eyes stay on you for the entire song and until it gets to my guitar solo, my eyes falling shut as I let my head roll back and let the music take me. When the song comes to an end and see you blow me a kiss, I pretend to snatch it out of the air and place it on my cheek where you had kissed earlier, giving you another wink and smiling widely.

With the way things have been going between us, all I can think about is being around you more, talking to you and seeing those eyes and that smile. I want more of you. These shows and our grocery hangouts aren’t enough. 

When the set is done, I make eye contact with you, subtly nodding my head towards the doors to the side of the building that lead outside before I tell the guys I’ll be right back and head out. My heart is pounding in my chest when I get out there, leaning against the wall and taking a cigarette out of my pack and placing it between my lips before lighting it as I wait for you, hoping you got the hint.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

After your show ends, I watch you make a gesture with your head towards a door and then I watch as you say something to your bandmates before hopping off the stage and walking out the door. Does he want me to follow him? I pick up what is now my second drink of the night and slam the rest of it. A little liquid courage before I potentially ruin a good thing. No! I try to stay positive. There’s no way that he’d be this flirty and sweet if he didn’t also feel the same. I set my empty glass down and follow you out the door with a sharp exhale. 

When I step outside I see you leaning against the wall, one of your boots up against the building, smoking. If I’d seen you for the first time right now I’d probably think you were the average bad boy, but I know that’s not you. You’re soft, kind, gentle, and incapable of the horrible rumors I’ve heard now from multiple people while working at the library. I walk over to you with a smile, pulling at my arm from across my body, “That was a great show Eds. You definitely um-“ I search for the right word, “surprised me with that new song you added to the lineup.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie.* :☆ﾟ. ──

I see you walking over at the corner of my eye and flick my cigarette way, not knowing if you’d be okay if I smoke in front of you since I haven’t before tonight. Smiling, I look you over contently before my eyes meet yours when you talk about the song. “Did we do it justice?” I take your hand and pull you gently to where you’re standing in front of me, keeping your hand in mine afterwards and running my thumb along your knuckles.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

When you pull me gently to stand directly in front of you and make no move to let go of my hand, all my nerves to ask you out goes out the window. Instead I deflect, “You didn’t have to stop smoking you know. I don’t mind.” I squeeze your hand, also refusing to let go, “You absolutely did the song justice! Everything you play is incredible. I could listen to you all night long.” That second drink making itself known as I keep rambling.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie.* :☆ﾟ. ──

My eyes are adoring as I listen to you talk, your voice having become my favorite sound within the few weeks we’ve been talking. Without thinking, I brush some hair behind your ear and hum. “You’re so fucking adorable. Could hear you talk all day, you know that?” My voice comes out soft and deep, running my thumb along your cheekbone before I’m dropping my hand back down, my other hand still holding yours.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Between your words and the soft touches to my cheekbone, I’m melting! I feel myself lean into your space a bit more, our skin still tethered together where you’re holding my hand. 

Now that we’re alone out here in the night air I do something I wanted to do the moment I saw you wearing the shirt. I lift my hand slowly, my eyes looking into your asking for permission, “Eddie? Is it ok if I touch your chest?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie.* :☆ﾟ. ──

My breath hitches at your request, and I take hold of your hand that’s making its way to my chest, my heart pounding for another reason. I try to slow it down, however, knowing you won’t judge me and I can trust you, but it doesn’t make this any less scary. Swallowing hard, I slowly release your hand from my trembling fingers before nodding. “Yeah.” It comes out a bit breathless, but I don’t stop yeah. “Yeah, sweetheart, it’s okay.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I can sense your hesitation and I’d be surprised if you weren’t a little unsure but I want to show you that I won’t judge you or hurt you. I know building that trust takes time, but I hope this is a start. I never take my eyes off of you as I lay my open palm tenderly on the covered part of your chest. Right on top of your heart. I can feel your rapid heartbeat pounding under your skin. My fingers curl lightly and rub into the cotton fabric. Just ever so briefly I look down at my own hand and watch my fingers gently massaging back and forth in the slightest of movements. Then my eyes look back up into yours, “Eddie? I—“ my breath shakes a bit from my nerves, “I really like being around you. I want to be around you all the time,” my hand keeps moving ever so slightly. “And not just at your shows, would you um, would you want to have dinner with me on Friday?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie.* :☆ﾟ. ──

I’m putting myself in a pretty vulnerable position right now, letting you close like this so you can get a better look at my chest, my scars. Your touch, when I finally feel your hand on my heart, I try not to evaporate, to crumble. My body is trembling the slightest bit and I know my breathing has picked up somewhat, especially when I feel your fingers curl against me. But I’m not expecting your confession, not expecting for you to be the one asking me out. And I can’t help but chuckle because this is the second time now where you’ve beat me to the punch. “You have got to stop doing this, baby.” My eyes glint with playfulness as I look down at you. “Just had to wait a few more minutes before I finally got up the courage to do it myself.” I place my hand back to your hand that’s on my chest, gently taking hold of your wrist and running my thumb along your pulse point. “Would love nothing more than to have dinner with you, Erica.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

A wave of pleasure washes over my entire body when you agree to go out for dinner with me! I love the feeling of your hand on my wrist, pressing into my veins, feeling my rapidly rising pulse. When you tease me about beating you to the punch I can’t hold back a laugh, “How about you drive me home?” My eyes roll back playfully along with my next phrase, dragging out some of my words as I talk, “I may not have listened to your previous warnings and walked here tonight.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie.* :☆ﾟ. ──

My eyes widen when you tell me you walked here yourself. “Are you-“ I stop myself and let out a breath as I let my head rest back against the wall before I’m opening my eyes again to look at you. “You’re gonna give me a heart attack, sweetheart.” I squeeze your wrist twice, playfully. “Course I’ll drive you home. Why don’t we head back inside? I need to help the guys finish packing up. And you can have yourself another drink on me if you want, yeah?” 

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Your exasperated look when you lay your head back against the wall is somehow really endearing, your concern for my safety makes me feel like the luckiest girl in the world. 

“That sounds great Eds,” as we walk back inside I keep hold of the hand that had been holding mine since I first walked outside with you, only finally letting go when we reach the stage again, “I’ll be right over there,” pointing to the bar, “I know you big strong men probably don’t need my help but if you need a fifth pair of hands you know where to find me.” Before I walk away I reach up and cup your cheek in my hand and rub my thumb against your cheek as you had done to mine. 

Without another word I head over to the bar and ask Tracy to make me one more drink. While I wait my eyes lock in the direction of the stage. I’m suddenly really glad I decided to leave the back of my shirt blank because if all goes well on Friday during our date…I didn’t call it a date! Does he know that’s what it is? Calm down, just make some comment and see how he reacts. 

After sending myself into a short panic I hear the clink of the glass as it’s set in front of me. I take a sip and try to refocus my thoughts. If all goes well on our date, I know exactly what I’m writing on the back of my shirt.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie.* :☆ﾟ. ──

When I get back on stage to help pack up, the guys give me a knowing look without saying anything. I roll my eyes at them before I’m going about getting everything in my van. 

Once everything is packed, I say goodbye to the guys before I head back inside to you and sit at the bar with you. “Hey, pretty girl. Come here often?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I jump a little when you surprise me by sitting right beside me. I turn and meet your gorgeous brown eyes. With a coy smile, I lean my chin in my palm, “I do actually, thinking of becoming a regular. My favorite bartender works here,” this third drink is definitely making it so I couldn’t drive home even if I wanted to. 

I lean in really close to you and whisper., “He’s super cute, has really great hair and is supposed to be driving me home.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie.* :☆ﾟ. ──

My grin spreads a bit wider as you play along before I’m pinching your side. “Looks like you’re really feeling that third drink, sweetheart.” I chuckle as I get up from the stool I sat myself in. “You ready for me to take you home?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

My tipsy brain hears the words you just said and now all I can picture is you actually taking me home, walking me up to my apartment, laying me down in my bed…my eyes flutter- shooing away my fantasy that’s now got me all hot and bothered. Maybe depending on how you react to me using the word date, I’ll allow myself to continue that fantasy when I’m all by myself tonight. 

I get up from the bar and stumble a bit. I grab you by the hands to steady myself, “Yep! Definitely no driving for me!” I keep hold of your hand and pull you with me, “Come on hot stuff, take me home!” My eyes roll back a bit to avoid looking directly at you, “I know you said you’d buy me that drink but I already paid, I guess I just don’t listen very well,” my playful giggles fill in the spaces between the words. As we walk towards the door and make our way out to your van. Letting my tipsy horny mind take over, I lean up and whisper in your ear, “Maybe you’ll just have to tie me up with that bandana of yours until I behave.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie.* :☆ﾟ. ──

Chuckling as I watch you, I can’t help but to find you adorable like this. “Easy there, sweetheart.” I say as you stumble and I make sure my hands are sturdy enough so that you don’t fall as you hold onto them. Once you tell me you paid for the drink I wanted to pay for, I give your side a little squeeze and say, “Don’t worry, I’ll be sure to pay for you when we go out, yeah?” 

It’s your next words that have me choking on air and a deep blush rising to my cheeks as I look down at you with wide eyes in attention. Something else twitches subtly in attention too. Clearing my throat, we get to my van and I open the door for you once it’s unlocked. “Alright, you minx, let’s get you home.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

My already flushed face warms when you call me a minx as you open the door for me. I melt into your passenger seat and him along with the song that plays from the speakers. The ride to my place is far too short, I love being in your presence so much. I could spend every minute of my time with you. 

“Thank you for the ride home Eds, I still feel a little wobbly. W-would you um, would you mind walking me up to my apartment? It’s on the second floor and I’d love not to fall down the stairs.” I close my eyes but look over at you with a smile.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie.* :☆ﾟ. ──

The drive to your apartment is peaceful, making me feel content and I glance over at you from time to time. I have to press my hand into my thigh and scratch my nails against the denim to get rid of the itch to reach over and hold your hand in mine again. 

It’s too soon for my liking when I pull up to your apartment building, smiling softly when you thank me for a ride before you’re asking me to walk you up to your door. It sends my heart racing as well as my mind with different scenarios as to what could happen if I walk you up there. Is she trying to invite me in? Do I want to be invited in? Of course I do! Oh god what would happen if she did? Would we kiss? Would we…? I have to stop my thoughts by subtly pinching my thigh a bit hard in order to answer you. “I’ll walk you up.” I agree with a nod before I turn off the van, walking over to your side and taking out my hand to help you out. “But only if you let me give you a piggyback ride.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

For a moment I worry that you might think I’m trying to invite you in, as much as I would absolutely love that, I genuinely just want help getting up two flights of stairs. You being ever the gentleman you get out and open my door for me. I look up at you with a surprised, wide eyed look when you ask to give me a piggyback ride. 

If I were sober my first thought would be to panic that my weight is too much for you to handle. But the thought of having my body pressed against yours and my arms wrapped around your shoulders, and you touching my legs at the same time? I think I might combust on the spot if you hold me like that, so I’m willing to take that risk. 

You help me out of my seat and I pull you towards the double doors, “Anything for you Eds,” I reach up and squeeze your biceps, “I’d love to feel you carry me on your back with those big strong arms.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie.* :☆ﾟ. ──

I look at your hand squeezing my bicep and chuckle as I blush a little before shaking my head. “Okay, okay. Come on, baby. Let’s get you home,” I say before I turn around and bend my knees a little so it’ll be easier for you to get on my back. “Time to hop on the ole Munson Express.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

My heart is pounding as you lower yourself so I can get on your back. Sure we’ve had a few fleeting touches, tonight we took it to a new level with the kisses to one another’s cheeks, but feeling your hands against the back of my knees is something completely different. Not wanting to hurt you I gently wrap my arms around your neck and shoulders before leaning in, helping you as best I can as you pick me up. I instantly feel like I never want to let you go. 

My head instinctively falls to your shoulder, “You’re the best Eds.” I close my eyes and feel myself almost feeling asleep in the comfort of your touch and scent, “S’comfy up here” I mumble into your hair and let out a sleepy yawn when we make it to the top of the stairs, “It's the last one on the left.” 

I wish this hallway was longer because having you carry me so tenderly warms my heart. While I’m still in your arms I let out another sleepy sentiment, “Can’t wait for our date on Friday. S’gonna be so much fun!”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie.* :☆ﾟ. ──

I just listen to you talk as I walk up the stairs of the building before we get to your floor, following your directions when you tell me which apartment is yours. 

Throughout most of the ride here and before that when I was helping the guys pack up everything, I was wondering if our dinner Friday was a date. I want it to be a date, but you didn’t really call it that. Maybe I’m reading too much into it. Maybe it’s just two friends having dinner together. But it feels like my feelings may be reciprocated. You kissed my cheek as well, you let me hold your hand, we talk on the phone every night. I mean that little innuendo you whispered to me earlier should tell me you have some form of attraction to me! 

But then you suddenly say you can’t wait for our date and I let out a breath I didn’t realize I was holding. When we get to your door, I set you down and I turn around to face you, a hopeful look taking over my features. “So it is a date then? You want to go on a date with me?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

When you set me down and turn to face me, I’m suddenly aware of how small I feel. Your height over me and your broad shoulders facing right at me have my back submissively falling flush against the door to my apartment. 

Your expression has my brain so confused, you look surprised but hopeful at my words. I swallow hard in my throat. I press my lips together in a thin line and look directly into your eyes before answering you with an affirmative nod of my head.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie.* :☆ﾟ. ──

I give a wide grin before I’m leaning my arm against the frame of your door as I look down at you, reaching over and tucking a stray strand of hair behind your ear. “Good. Because I really wanted it to be a date.” My voice comes out softer and a bit deeper than I intended as I look down into your ocean eyes. 

My hand lingers, my thumb running along under your eye before my hand travels to your chin. All I can think about right now is kissing you. Seeing the way you’re looking up at me, it makes my heart melt. I just want to feel your lips against mine.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Fuck he’s so close! As you lean in and brush a strand of hair behind my ear, I find my breath again with a deep and shaky inhale. Then I hear your words, with that absolutely sinful tone and melt against the door behind me. Somehow I manage to squeak out a quiet, shy response, “I really want it to be a date too Eds.” 

Our eyes lock in the silence of that hallway. I feel your thumb brushing softly along my skin, is he going to kiss me? You already kissed my cheek but this feels different. With promises of a date hanging in the air between us, the look in your eyes says all the same feelings running around in my head, that you want to kiss me right now. I look up at you with pleading eyes trying to silently convey that I want your lips on mine so bad!

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie.* :☆ﾟ. ──

My hand trails slightly lower on your face, my thumb tracing the curve of your lower lip at your chin and it takes everything in me to not place my thumb against your lips like I want to. When my eyes find yours again, my heart stutters in my chest as I see the want in them. You want to kiss me to kiss you. I can tell by the way you’re looking up at me and it makes me feel weak. I let in a slow, shaking breath as I start to lean in. 

At first, I decide to press another kiss to your cheek, much slower and lingering before doing the same to your other cheek. When I finally let the breath out I was holding, long and trembling, I rest my forehead against yours. My lips are tingling with the feeling of your skin, itching and craving to hold your bottom lip between them. My hand travels lower, taking a gentle yet firm hold at the nape of your neck, wanting to have control over this situation but not wanting to control you. Our noses brush together as I lean closer, knowing just how perfect the moment our lips will meet will be, and that’s what has me stopping. “I want to kiss you, Erica. I really want to kiss you right now.” My words are low, sounding like silk and honey. And I almost give in, but I pull away just two inches to look into your eyes. “But I can’t. Not yet. I want to earn your kiss on our date Friday. Want to deserve it.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

The feeling of your thumb tracing just outside the curve of my lips, followed by the way you slowly lean in has my heart pounding! This is it! The moment that confirms my feelings are returned. I let out another low breath when you kiss my cheeks instead. My hand reaches up and finds its home again on your chest, playing with the fabric of your shirt, resisting the urge to tug you forward into me. I can feel your heart racing beneath your chest. You want this as much as I do. 

When you take charge by reaching around and cupping the back of my neck my fingers grip harder against your chest, sending my wants and desires through each loving tug. My eyes close when you press our foreheads together, so close that our noses touch. Your skin feels so good against mine, I want more! My lips part ever so slightly thinking about how much I want you to take control and just press our lips together! With your sweet words you take any last shred of doubt, my feelings for you are definitely not one sided. The way you just said my name has my thighs pressing together so tightly in a futile attempt to soothe the ache that now fills my core. I open my eyes and just when I think you’re going to kiss me you tell me you want to earn it on our date. 

My other hand joins its mate on your chest, my eyes losing themselves in your warm chocolate smile, “You do deserve it Eddie. But I’ll be looking forward to our date even more.” My hands feather over your shirt, up your shoulders, and around your neck. I pull you in for a firm, promising hug, “I really want to kiss you too, Eds, but for now I’ll be content with a hug.” With my arms wrapped around your neck still I pull you into a proper hug, lifting my back off the door, “Pick me up at 7 on Friday ok? I know where I want to go but it’s a surprise.” 

I give you one final squeeze before letting go and lingering with my hand on the doorknob, “Good night Eds. Call me to let me know you got home safely.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie.* :☆ﾟ. ──

As a few days go by I get back into a routine but I find myself getting less sad and more mad. One evening standing in my kitchen chopping vegetables after work I think, fuck it. I should just cut my losses, leave my lease early and go back home. But some part of me doesn’t want to give him the satisfaction of knowing I couldn’t handle it here on my own. Also, I find myself oddly saddened at the thought of never seeing you again.

It’s almost been a week since that night and I head into work for my open to close Saturday shift. I’m reshelving the return cart from last night when Caroline, the only coworker I’d consider kind of a friend, walks in. She greets me with a smile and we talk through the gaps in the shelves of the mystery section as the both of us work to get this cart cleared.

“So have you and Jackson checked out that bar I told you about yet?”

I bristle at her question, “Um no,” I pretend to be reading the author's name on a book, “He uh, he broke up with me actually.” She tries to console me but I can tell she’s not sad, I follow it up quickly not wanting to dwell on the thought too long, “I did though! I went the other day and I saw a really good metal band. I think they were called Coffin something…Corroded Coffin! That’s what it was!” I feel my voice getting excited that I remembered your band’s name! For some reason words about you keep spilling from my mouth, “I talked with the lead guitarist before the show. He was really sweet. He works there too, maybe you’ve seen him before.”

As I describe your appearance, Janice, one of the older ladies who’s probably worked here her whole life, butts into our conversation, “I know that boy. You should stay away from him. Back in ‘86 he killed a young girl. Still haven’t figured out how he’s walking around free, seems like after that earthquake struck, everyone just sorta forgot about the satanic murders he’d committed.” Even Caroline nods in agreement.

When she accuses you of murder the wind gets sucked from my lungs. There’s a sudden heaviness in my chest. There’s no way. I can just feel it. I think about your kind eyes that made me feel all warm and fuzzy. No. They have to be wrong.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

When I work at Saul's auto shop the next night, it’s with you on my mind. I don’t know what it is, but I can’t seem to stop thinking about you. Everything I did today, you were at the back of my mind all day, your smile invading my memory out of the blue.

A few days later, while Steve is over at my place hanging out and having a beer, I decide to ask him if he knew you, giving a description of what you look like. Steve shakes his head, a bit surprised that he doesn’t. “Usually I know all the hot chicks in Hawkins, but not this one. Why?” I bite my lip before shrugging. “Just wondering. Saw her at The Hideout the other day and she seemed cool.” Steve looks at me for a few seconds before a knowing grin spreads slowly on his lips. “She seemed cool, huh?” I roll my eyes and sigh, shaking my head. “Forget it, Harrington.” He tries to get me to talk about you more but I tell him to drop it and Steve knows not to push things too much with me.

After nearly a week, I don’t think about you as much but you’re still there. And I can’t help but still wish that I at least knew your name. I have the night off of work, but I realize I’m out of a lot of groceries. Cursing to myself, I wait until it’s pretty dark out before deciding to head into town. I might not live in Hawkins, but everything is still a lot closer there than if I were to continue into the town I live in now. Anxiety fuels me every time I need to make a stop in town when it isn’t for work, afraid someone will recognize me and harass me like how they did which was the reason I moved in the first place.

With my hair up in a low bun, I have a hood over my head as I walk inside the grocery store, grabbing a cart and going about everything as quickly as I can.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

After work, that conversation with my coworkers fills my mind. Almost to the point where I forget about my breakup for a little while. Almost. I finish cleaning up a bit, as I’m changing into my pajamas, I find one of Jackson’s shirts that he must’ve stuck in my drawer by accident. Just the sight is enough to get the water flowing from my tear ducts again. I try not to let myself slip down that path of thinking about all the fun times we had together but it doesn’t work. I realize that what I need is just a good ol’ fashioned post break up ice cream binge so I throw on a sweater with my cotton pajama shorts and head to the grocery store.

It’s a clear cool night so I decide to walk. The grocery store isn’t very far from my apartment. Bonus, because it’s late, It’s not that busy. So I can grab what I need and head back home to cry some more.

I head right to the back of the store where the frozen section is and survey my choices. I stand there debating between Rocky Road and mint brownie fudge when I hear the wheels of a cart moving quickly in the next aisle over, looking up at the sign I see that the next aisle has frozen pizza. I decide to spoil myself and grab one of those as well. I put the rocky road back and head into the next aisle, stopping in my tracks because as soon as I turn the corner I see you!

You’ve got your hood up but I can still see your face and little pieces of your curly hair sticking out, is the rest of it tucked back? I’m pretty sure your hair was longer than that. Just the sight of you brings me joy that I might finally get to learn the name of the boy who has invaded my thoughts.

I walk over to you with a wave, “Hey stranger! It’s me, Long Island girl.” I smile at you, suddenly worried that my eyes might still be red from crying earlier. A new fear rises up too, what if all week I’ve been thinking about someone who doesn’t even remember I exist. I mean all he did was make me a drink and tell me briefly about his band. Why would he remember me, shit this was a mistake. Oh god- what if he thinks I’m here about that story Janice told me? I start to panic that thinking you’d want to talk to me again was a mistake.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I grab essentials, bread, milk, beer, etc. but then I get distracted by a tv dinner I used to eat when I was younger and decide to grab a few of those and…why not and get some more frozen foods? It’s way faster than cooking, anyway. I’ve tried to cook more lately since I’m now living on my own, but all of these frozen dinners look so tempting.

I’m looking down at a box of frozen macaroni with broccoli, a bit perplexed that it has the words “Vegan” on it and reading the ingredients on the back to see what makes it vegan, when I hear someone talking to me. I flinch a little, not expecting to run into anyone and trying not to feel panicked until I lift my head to see who it is before you’re telling me who you are. And holy shit it’s you. The girl that’s been on my mind for almost a week is standing in front of me, smiling and actually looking happy to see me.

I take you in, noticing your oversized sweatshirt and cute sleep shorts before I’m looking at your face. Has she been crying? Last time I saw you, you were sad then, too. I feel a tightness in my chest before I realize I haven’t said anything. I smile back, pushing the hood off my head so I don’t feel so ridiculous. Although it does leave the scar on my neck and jaw a bit more exposed.

“Hey! It’s good to see you.” I tell you genuinely before I look at the box I still have in my hand and saying fuck it, dropping it into my cart. “Was starting to think I made you up in my head,” I admit with a chuckle, shaking my head a little. “I never really caught your name, though. I’m Eddie, by the way.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Eddie. Eddie. I play your name on repeat in my head like my favorite song. When I hear your voice lift with a chuckle as you tell me you thought you’d made me up in your head, the butterflies I’d felt that night at the bar awakened in my stomach. Maybe you’d been thinking about me too. All my anxiety that you wouldn’t want to talk to me or that I bothered you melts away.

“Nope,” I giggle and smile up at you, just the sight of you has lifted my spirits. Now that we’re not separated by the bar counter I’m very aware of your height advantage. “I’m very much real.” I step a little closer and hold my hand out towards you, “My name’s Erica. It’s so nice to officially meet you Eddie. I’m glad you’re real too because I didn’t get a chance to tell you the other night how much I was enjoying your show.”

I let my eyes soak up your appearance. I suddenly feel underdressed. Your frame fills out your leather jacket so nicely, the boots you're wearing really make you look the part of a rockstar. Your curls pulled back in a low bun look so soft and effortless I'm actually a little jealous. I try really hard not to stare at the scar I see peaking out along the neck of your hoodie. I distract myself by wondering maybe if one day we could be good friends and you’d feel comfortable telling me the story.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Your giggle is like music to my ears and I chuckle when you tell me you're real. I falter the slightest bit when you take a step towards me before you’re taking out your hand for me to shake. Usually I would think of Lucas’ little sister when hearing the name ‘Erica,’ the now spitfire of a 13 year old having grown on me over the years and still an important person in my life after everything that’s happened. But hearing you say it as your name, the kid leaves my memory and I can’t help but think of how well it fits you, fits your smile.

I take your hand, hoping to god mine isn’t sweaty and give it a shake but I don’t let it go as you tell me you’re glad that I’m real. It makes my heart swell and my stomach to feel all weird, and I feel a lightness to myself. My smile widens when you tell me you enjoyed the show. “Yeah? M’glad to hear it, sweetheart.” I realize I’m still holding your hand and drop it with an apology before I see your basket of groceries. Well, ice cream, and I raise an eyebrow. “Running low?” I gesture to the basket with a grin.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Your hand feels so warm against mine and I don’t really want to let go. I’ve never experienced this before, making a friend on my own as an adult. All my friends I left behind in Indy were people I knew from high school, or his friends. Your smile when I say I liked your show makes me believe that we could be friends. I see you realize we are still holding hands which I actually also forgot and I’m grateful when you quickly drop my fingers because I don’t want to accidentally make things weird before I even get a chance to know you. I see you gesture towards my lone pint of ice cream sitting in the basket.

I let out a little nervous laugh and reach up to fidget with a piece of my hair between the fingers you’d just been holding, “Well um no. Not exactly,” I let out another nervous laugh, trying to maintain my composure. I can’t look you in the eye because I don’t want to start crying again but for some reason I find it oddly easy to talk to you, “The reason I missed the rest of your show was because I was kinda getting dumped in the parking lot.” I stand there quietly for a second, unsure of what to say next, “Guess I thought maybe ice cream and frozen pizza would make me feel better.”

I bend at my waist and wrap my arms around my back to take a peek at your cart and see that you're doing what looks to be a real grocery run grabbing the essentials, “Of course Mr big heavy metal star needs to shop at night when all his fans won’t bombard him. Don’t worry, your secret is safe with me, your newest fan.” I wink up at you through my bangs with a smile.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I immediately feel like an asshole when you mention you were getting dumped in the parking lot, concluding to me why you are so upset when you came back inside with Tracy and also why it looks like you’ve just been crying. Although I am a bit confused, because who would break up with you? If anything, I thought it would be the other way around. I’d let you ruin my life if you gave me the chance.

I clear my throat to get myself to focus back on you in front of me now instead of the thoughts of you swirling around in my head. Your words make me remember where I am, why I’m here and that I should probably leave soon if I want to avoid anyone else noticing me. I can’t help but feel a little flustered though when you wink at me and call yourself my newest fan. But I do laugh a bit nervously and roll my eyes a little. “Right, fans. Let’s call them that.” Instinctively, I pull my hood back up as I look around the store, especially when I hear the bell ring indicating someone else is walking in here.

I know I should leave, but I don’t want to stop talking to you. I just learned your name for Christ’s sake. “M’really sorry to hear about that, sweetheart.” I tell you genuinely. “If you ask me,” I place a hand on my chest over my heart as I grin. “It’s his loss.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

For some reason you sound a little nervous when I make that comment about your fans. My mind briefly wonders why but then my heart pumps hard in my chest when you smile at me and say it was his loss. Your smile looks so genuine that I can’t help but bat my eyelashes back at you with a wide grin. Especially hearing you call me sweetheart again, “Thank you Eddie. That means a lot.”

Talking with you has made me decide at least for tonight, I don’t want to focus on what I lost anymore. Instead I want to lose myself to the possibility of what I may have found. I adjust the grip on my basket and walk over to one of the doors and grab a frozen extra cheese pizza, “You know what? You’re right! It is his loss! I have a few more things I should probably grab while I’m here. I’d love it if a certain handsome metalhead would keep me company.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

“Of course,” I say with a small nod as you thank me before you’re walking over to the freezer and grabbing a pizza. I try not to admire your body when you’re turned from me, looking anywhere else but my eyes seem to glance over every now and then. Soon, you’re facing me again and asking me to keep you company with your shopping. You want me to walk with you? You want to walk next to me and talk with me? Jesus Christ is my luck finally looking up for once? “Uh yeah,” I agree easily, sounding a little surprised and maybe a tad eager. “Yeah, I can keep you company.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

My smile covers every inch of my face when you agree to walk with me as I grab a few more things. In truth I don’t actually need anything else but I don’t want to stop talking with you yet. I’ve always been the odd one out with my social group when it comes to music, so I’m not going to lose out on the chance to talk to a fellow metalhead about it. I walk towards the end of the aisle slowly and try not to stand as close to you as I actually want to while we walk together.

I make a contemplative humming noise and look up at you over my shoulder, “Ok! Top 3 bands that inspired you to play guitar— go!” I twist and turn to walk backwards slightly in front of your cart after grabbing a box of cereal that was displayed at the end of the row because I don’t want to stop looking at you.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I let out a small, playful scoff. “Metallica, Sabbath, and Dio. Too easy, sweets.” I grin mischievously, my eyes watching your every move as you walk backwards while talking to me. I grab a box of cereal as well and toss it in my cart, giving it a glance to make sure I had grabbed the right one but I don’t really want to take my eyes off you.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I curl my lip in a little pout as we make our way to the next stop on our little journey through the grocery store, “Alright mister how about this one? Dio solo albums or Dio with Sabbath? Because I myself love Last in Line,” I drag out my words playfully, “But I think I prefer the Heaven and Hell album he put out with Sabbath.” I get a little carried away talking about my favorite bands, secretly jumping over the moon that we have those in common.

I feel a familiar feeling creeping up though that I’m being too much. After years of not being able to talk to anyone about my interests though, I can’t help it. Soon we are grabbing the last thing I can think to pretend that I need and I lead us towards the register.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

“Alright, I will say that Heaven and Hell is fuckin amazing, but come on, Erica. Dio’s solo albums are classic. Can’t go wrong with those, ever.” My smile hasn’t disappeared since we started shopping together, feeling normal for the first time in a long time. That feeling goes away quite quickly however when we get to the register and I see the way the cashier is looking at me. My smile drops and I go quiet, letting you go first in the line since you have a small amount of stuff compared to what’s in my cart.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

“Fair point,” I set my few items up on the counter as I keep talking to you, “Damn, it is so nice to have someone to debate music with. My um- my ex hates metal.” I go about paying the cashier and grabbing my 2 bags from the end of the counter and I turn back to you and see your smile gone.

I want to try to help bring it back so without a word, I start helping you set your stuff on the counter for the cashier to scan all the while a content smile on my lips as I think about how happy I am that I decided to go out tonight because I got to see you again, even if it was fleeting, it was worth it.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I give you a small smile when I notice you helping me, causing butterflies to swarm in my stomach at the kind gesture. I mentally pray the woman at the register doesn’t say anything, my heart pounding a little faster than normal with anxiety. I pull out my wallet and take out some cash, counting the bills and handing it to her when she tells me my total. “Keep the change.” I mumble, quickly grabbing the bags and putting them back in the cart so I can just get the hell out of there.

When we get outside, I notice that it has started raining and I stop so we are still under the covering. “Where’s your car?” I ask, looking down at you.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I see you rushing through your transaction and I’m wondering if I missed something. Especially when you tell her to keep the change.

When we get outside under the entrance cover, I look up to the sky with a worried look, “I may have walked here.” I try to stay positive though! And meet your gaze from where you’re looking down at me. I feel my cheeks flush with how close we are suddenly standing. I can’t help but stare into your warm brown eyes for a moment before looking back up at the falling raindrops, “It was so nice earlier I didn’t even think about it. Good thing I don’t have very far to go.” I point vaguely in the direction of my apartment building. I ready myself for the sad goodbye I know is coming now that we have to part ways.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

My brows furrow together when you tell me you walked here, glad to see that you’re okay but thinking about just how dangerous that can be. Things may be over, but it doesn’t mean I don’t still get scared about the possibility of the upside down and what it holds returning. Not to mention the creeps that wander around at night. It doesn’t take long for me to come to a decision. “I can take you home,” I offer. My eyes widen after I say it, realizing how forward that sounds. “Drive. I can drive you home.” And after that, I can’t stop talking. “I just don’t think it would be safe. It’s late at night and you’re a pretty girl walking home and not to mention you could get sick from the rain.”

I look in the direction you pointed in, seeing your apartment building and noticing that it is pretty close but I know I won’t feel okay knowing I let you walk home, but I also don’t want to force you to ride with me. “If you don’t want to, I’ll understand, having just really met and all. But it would make me feel a lot better knowing that I got you home safe and dry.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Your offer has my head swirling for so many reasons and all of them give me a pleasant ache in my chest. First, I can’t help but wonder if your terms of endearment like sweetheart and pretty girl are things that you just use on a regular basis or if you actually think I’m pretty, if you do I think I might melt because you are possibly the most handsome man I’ve ever seen and in our brief interactions you’ve made no indication that you are seeing someone. Second, your concern for my safety is something I’m not used to but I could definitely get used to having someone who cares enough about someone they just met to make sure they get home safely. There’s a third thing in there mixing around but I don’t pay it too much attention, I don’t care what rumors this town is spreading about you. I recall your face when I greeted you earlier tonight and you’d looked shocked that someone was actually talking to you. Not like someone on the prowl for an innocent victim.

From living in the city my whole life I’ve definitely learned to be vigilant when walking by myself and my gut isn’t telling me to run from you. It’s telling me that you wouldn’t hurt a fly.

“Thank you Eddie, I’d love not to get rained on,” I gesture to my bags, “Besides my ice cream might melt.” Something in me decides to be a little bold, “Not that I need it anymore for the reason I bought it. Something else has already made my night a whole lot brighter. Lead the way, brave knight!”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Relieved when you agree, I give a small grin before you say that something else made your night brighter. Is she talking about me? I made her night brighter? Me? I clear my throat and turn to look away from you as I try not to blush, especially when you call me brave knight.

“Alright, well, here.” I take your grocery bags from you and put them in my cart before I’m shrugging off my jacket and placing it over your shoulders. “So you don’t get wet.” I’m looking into your eyes now, realizing how close I am to you like this and I feel my heart in my throat for a moment before I’m grabbing hold of my cart again.

“That’s my van over there.” I point to it, grinning mischievously. “I’ll race you. You ready? Go!”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ─

My whole body threatens to fall over as you make my knees go weak by placing your jacket over my shoulders. As soon as the soft worn fabric hits my body, my senses take in the smell of leather along with a scent that is so uniquely you it just became my favorite smell ever. Ok it’s official, I think to myself in a soft, accepting tone as you look down at me, your brown eyes boring directly into my blue, nervously I adjust my glasses back properly onto my nose…I have a crush on this boy!

After pondering it this past week, and despite the fact that I still miss him, Jackson and I were over as soon as we got here. He may have just moved out but he’s been gone for months and I think I’m allowed to entertain the possibility that someone else might be able to make me even happier than he ever could.

You make me fall even harder when you grin and challenge me to a race towards your van. You catch me off guard and despite my best efforts to catch up I reach the van just seconds after you. I wrap myself up tighter in your jacket wanting to savor the moment as long as possible. Before I get too far ahead of myself though, I don’t even know if you’d want to be with me. I mean knowing my luck you’re probably already taken.

“So,” I pretend to count on my fingers as I put my hand on the passenger door handle, “You’re a gentleman, funny, incredibly handsome, you make the world's best Long Island, and you play guitar? Your girlfriend is one lucky lady Eddie.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Being here with you like this, I start feeling somewhat normal again, like I’m not trying to hide from everyone in this city. It makes me feel warm to see that someone is actually enjoying my company and not looking at me like a murderer other than Dustin or Steve or the rest of the party. It does make me wonder if you even know, if people have told you what they think of me. Probably not, considering you’re being so kind to me. And maybe I should tell you, but I don’t think I’d be able to handle the same look the rest of these people give me coming from you.

I want to savor this. For as long as I can. I’ve already established to myself that I am interested in you with the way my stomach flops around and the fact that you hadn’t left my mind since the other day at The Hideout. And, if this isn’t the last time we see each other, if there are other chances of us hanging out again, maybe I’ll tell you down the line. Maybe I’m getting a bit ahead of myself. This is only our second time meeting, but I can’t help but feel hopeful.

When you say “your girlfriend”, a loud laugh leaves me that I can’t hold in. “Girlfriend?” I snicker as I unlock your door and open it for you. “Definitely don’t have one of those, sweetheart. No one is really looking to date me.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Your loud laugh seems to echo through the empty parking lot as it fills me with joy. That is definitely a sound I want to hear again, daring to look directly at your face more and more. I can't help but notice a little hint of sadness when you say no one is looking to date you. I want to erase it.

“Well Eddie,” I step closer to where you’re standing after opening the door for me and leave barely a few inches between us. “If it’s any consolation,” I tilt my head slightly back so that our eyes meet. My face brightens with the happiest smile I’ve made in the months since I moved to Hawkins as I mimic your earlier words, “I think it’s their loss.”

I slip past you and sit in the passenger seat and cover my face to prevent you from seeing the blush covering my cheeks, although I could just blame it on the rain. I’m barely in the seat long enough to contemplate that I should just tell you I’ve heard the rumors about you and I don’t believe them before I realize that I left you with all the groceries. I instantly hop back out, “Oh my god how rude of me. Here let me help you put those away!”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

When you step closer to me, I tense up the slightest bit before softening at your words. Holy shit I like this girl. She’s definitely going to fucking ruin me. I keep my hands to my sides, itching to reach up and touch you in some way like moving hair from your face or giving you arm a light squeeze, but I keep to myself, not wanting to make you uncomfortable.

“Oh, you don’t have to do that,” I say when you offer to help me put the groceries in the van, but I don’t stop you. “Thanks.” I grab as much as I can at once so it’ll be faster to get everything in and I can get you home. “So um…where are you from? I lived in Hawkins most of my life and I’ve never seen you, so I’m assuming you’re not from here.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Retaking my place in your passenger seat and buckling my seatbelt I answer your question, “I grew up in Indianapolis. I’ve only been in Hawkins a little over 6 months. Just renewed my lease actually,” My head is nodding a bit as I speak and look out the window, “Jack- my ex, wanted to move here and settle down.” I let out a nervous laugh and fidget with my fingers as my gaze falls to my lap, “I guess just not with me. He didn’t say it but I’m pretty sure he was seeing someone else.”

I don’t really want to make things uncomfortable with you so I give my thighs a light pat and turn back towards you, “Anyways, I still love the city but I have to be honest, Hawkins is starting to grow on me a little. Right now I work at the library and one day I’d like to publish my own book.”

My apartment building is rapidly approaching and I can’t let you leave without knowing when I will see you again. I nervously twirl my fingers around a strand of my hair, “When’s your next show? As your newest fan I want to make sure I attend all of them! Corroded Coffin might’ve just dethroned Dio at the top of my metal gods list.” I hope the smile I make sends you the hint that even though we just met, you’ve already completely captivated me.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I let out a huff when you tell me you think your ex may have been seeing someone else, shaking my head and trying not to roll my eyes at the fact that this guy had really left you. You! Who could be that dense?

When you tell me you’d like to publish your own book, I decide to take a mental note to ask you more about that later. Even though I don’t know if there will be a later. Would you want there to be a later?

My question is answered when you ask me about my next show, perking up a little and smiling broadly before answering, “We play every Tuesday night.” I feel a little giddy when you say my band dethroned Dio. “Flattery will get you everywhere with me, sweetheart.” I wink at you before looking back to the road and pulling up in front of the apartment.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

My heart flutters at the prospect of getting to see you again so soon, “I’ll be there, and for the whole thing this time too!” I hold out my hand for a pinky promise, “Thank you Eddie. I’ve never had more fun grocery shopping in my life.” I have one hand on the door waiting to get out and leave. I feel like I could spend a lifetime talking with you but for now I’m just going to savor every moment I get with you.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I look down at you sticking out your hand to give me a pinky promise, melting inside as I think you just get even more adorable the longer I’m around you. Reaching over, I hook your pinky with mine and grin. “I take pinky promises very seriously, Erica. I hope you know that.” Keeping hold of it for a little longer, I finally let it go when I realize you have to leave even though I really don’t want you to. “I had a fun time too.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I giggle when you say you take pinky promises very serious, “I would never break the sanctity of a pinky promise good sir! I hope my favorite bartender is there because I would love another one of his delicious long islands.”

With a heavy heart I finally open the door and go to grab my groceries from the back. Before turning to leave I wave at you through the closed window of your van with a big smile before I start hurrying into my apartment building to avoid getting any more wet from the rain.

I make it all the way upstairs and I walk into my kitchen to start putting away the groceries before I realize I still have your jacket wrapped snugly around my shoulders.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

“Oh, he’ll be there, sweetheart!” I call to you when you get out of my car, the passenger window down. “He’ll be looking forward to seeing his favorite customer.” I watch you walk inside, making sure you made it in okay before I finally drive off, a smile playing on my lips throughout the entire ride back home.

My heart is hammering in my chest in the best way and I feel like I’m on cloud nine. That seemed like it went well. Did that go well? She called me her favorite bartender, there’s no way that didn’t go well!

When I get home, I realize you still have my jacket and I grin to myself, thinking about how cute you looked when you were wearing it.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

When I left earlier this evening feeling down and broken hearted I just wanted something to make me feel better, now? I’ve never been happier that I decided to go out on a whim because I got to see you again. All night I can’t stop thinking about you!

I finish putting my groceries away and chuckle to myself as I just stick the ice cream in the freezer for another night. If you hadn’t also been shopping my night would be looking very different. I hug myself one last time before removing your jacket.

Even though I know you’re not here, I want to be respectful of your things. So as much as it kills me to not sleep while snuggling with your jacket that thought that you would somehow know and be weirded out by me is too much. I hang your jacket on the back of my dining chair. I decide I’ll give it back to you on Tuesday when I go see your show. Finally, I turn the lights off and head into my bedroom.

I go over every detail from our shopping trip in my head as I get ready for bed, discarding the sweater I had on, settling on a loose tank top and fresh sleep shorts since the other ones got a little wet from the rain.

He seemed like he was having fun right? God I hope he didn’t think I was weird or too forward. He said flattery works with him and he must’ve called me sweetheart a dozen times— gah!! I flop down on my bed and stare at the ceiling, I really hope that’s not just how he talks. He’s such a sweetheart himself. I hope he knows how much he helped me tonight and I hope I helped him a little too. He looked so nervous at the checkout lane. Those rumors have to be lies! There’s no way a man that sweet and gentle could commit murder. If I hear anyone talking shit again I’m going to say something.

At some point I fall asleep with thoughts and images of you invading my dreams.

The next few days are the longest of my life! Every hour that passes closer to Tuesday night builds my anticipation for seeing you again. Your very being has taken root in my chest and knowing that you’ll be looking forward to seeing your favorite customer has the seed of affection sprouting. I have to make an impression tonight!

I wake up that morning early because my excitement won’t let me sleep in. I give myself a little self care day since I don’t have to work. I light some candles, do some light stretching, take a warm bath and make sure I pull out my favorite scented soaps. I style my hair in loose big curls and put on some light makeup. I check the time and start getting dressed. I pull on some sheer tights, a black skirt with some silver metal details, my favorite Dio concert shirt tucked in, and I pull on some short heeled black boots. As I grab my bag, I look at your leather jacket. I had every intention of giving it back to you tonight but that doesn’t mean I can’t wear it first.

My heart is pounding the entire time I drive to The Hideout. The last time I made this drive was under very different circumstances and I cannot wait to see your smiling face again.

My lips are curled in a permanent grin as I step inside the bar with your jacket around my torso. My eyes immediately look behind the bar hoping to spot your curly hair.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I thought I was already thinking about you too much before we ran into each other at the store. Now? You’ve invaded my every thought. The next couple days are fucking torture, wishing I could see you as the days drag on way too slow in anticipation for when I do get to see you again.

When the day finally arrives, it’s hard to stay asleep as I’m wracked with excitement but also nerves, wondering if you actually will show up and oh I hope that you do. I even tried a little harder with my clothes for my shift at work, wearing a Black Sabbath shirt I made into a v-neck a long time ago and my best pair of ripped black jeans along with a red flannel. This v-neck is one of the only ones I still wear after what happened to me in the upside down because it doesn’t show my scars. I also decide to wear a newer pair of doc martens and I adorn my signature rings and chain on my jeans. Over everything, I throw on a denim jacket I got as a hand me down from my uncle Wayne a while ago since you have my leather jacket, hoping I get to see you wear it tonight.

While at work, my eyes wander to the door every time the door opens, hoping to see you. Even when customers aren’t coming in, my eyes wander to the door constantly as I wonder when you’ll get here.

Coworkers of mine notice I’m a little distracted but don’t give me too much grief for it, just hoping that I’m okay and whatever is on my mind isn’t something to worry about.

At one point a couple of girls come in and take their place at the bar. They come in every other week or so and always compliment me and my band, flirting with us. I’ve noticed I seem to be a favorite of one of the girl’s, always coming up to talk to me and trying to pull me away to have a cigarette outside with her. This night is no different. As I’m making their drinks, she says something about my shirt and how it shows off my necklace and chest. I just give her a chuckle with a grin as I slide her drink over to her. “Thanks. I haven’t worn it in a while.” I look at the other girls. “Can I get you guys anything else?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I spot you right away behind the bar. I mean how could I not with how fucking hot you look tonight? Even from the door I can see the little dip in the collar of your shirt, exposing just the slightest bit of your chest. Shit, he really is going to kill me. I hope he likes that I wore his jacket.

I slip past the few people between me and the same spot I sat the last time I was here. I’m not sure if you’ve noticed me yet because I see you helping a couple girls. I wait patiently for my turn and can’t help but overhear parts of your conversation with them. The one girl is clearly flirting with you but your responses are having a likely unintended effect on me. Despite the girl's comments, you seem to be all business. Not once do I hear you call them pretty or sweetheart. I press my thighs together remembering all the times you called me those delightful words in just our first meeting. It’s making my cheeks flush and I haven’t even had any alcohol yet.

I wrap myself tighter in your jacket and try to discreetly lean down and smell it. After a few days in my apartment, it doesn’t smell quite as good as it did the night I accidentally brought it home but I can still smell your lingering scent clinging to the worn leather.

I prop my elbows up on the bar top and allow myself to take in your appearance as I wait for the big bright smile I hope you’ll have when you see that I did honor the pinky promise. I laugh in my mind, as if there was any chance I wouldn’t come see you again.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

“Your number would be nice,” the girl continues to flirt with me. I’m a bit surprised and flattered that she wants my number, but I’m not really interested in her like that. I mean yeah she’s beautiful, but she seems like the type of girl I would mess around with in high school. The ones who would just be with me because it would upset their parents or their ex or because they want to know what it’s like to be with the freak.

“Let’s keep it professional, yeah?” I chuckle before my mind is suddenly back on you and I start to look around again. It doesn’t take long for my eyes to land on you, seeing you sitting at the bar staring at me. A smile lights up my face immediately before I take in how you look. I don’t see your whole outfit since you’re sitting at the bar, but I see your Dio shirt and…holy shit, she’s wearing my jacket. Oh fuck she looks so good in it, too. I want to see her wear it all the time, Jesus Christ. I groan internally at the sight of you before I’m pulling my shit together and walking over.

“There she is,” I say once I make it over and set down an empty glass in front of you, pulling out the liquor I like to use for the Long Island. “Was beginning to think you changed your mind, sweetheart.” I tease before I start pouring. “How’s my favorite customer?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Your smile lifts me up out of my seat and onto cloud 9! Then hearing your voice again after missing it these past few days really solidifies how bad I’ve got it. I give you a little wave as you walk over towards me.

“Never! I wouldn’t miss the chance to see you again for the world!” I lean my cheek against my hand as I watch you work, “I’m good. Really good actually, how’s my favorite guitarist doing tonight?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

“Who me?” I scoff playfully when you say you wouldn’t miss the chance to see me for the world and call me your favorite guitarist as I pour some gomme syrup into the glass followed by whiskey. “I’m pretty sure you’re just after this drink.” I can’t help but flirt and tease you whenever I’m around you, it comes to me like second nature.

“I’m good, sweet girl, thank you for asking.” Once everything is poured into the glass, I then pour it into the shaker, sealing it up with the other end before I start to shake after sending you a wink.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

“You caught me,” I playfully wink back, “I can’t help it, you had me hooked with that first sip. You’re a pretty close second though.” Teasing you back gives me a fuzzy feeling in my chest that I want to keep chasing.

I giggle into my hand when you call me sweet girl, “Of course, sweet boy! I promised I’d be here for your whole entire set tonight so I need to make sure you’re feeling your best!” I lean in towards the bar trying to get as close to you as I can, “Do you’re best out there ok? Because I’ll be right here cheering you on!”

Just out of sheer curiosity, I glance over at the girls you’d been talking with when I walked in and the scowl coming from the one who’d asked for your number made me feel so thankful that I’d somehow managed to catch your attention. Not that I’m trying to make strangers jealous but knowing now that your flirty nicknames aren’t something you do with just anyone makes me feel desired in a way I haven’t felt in a long time.

I forget about everyone else in this bar and look back at you as though it’s just the two of us here and you’re about to play just for me. I know that’s obviously not true but hey I can pretend, “I’m really looking forward to the show Eddie. I can’t wait to watch you play.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

“I’m glad you were able to make it out,” I admit truthfully, softly, breaking the seal on the shaker before pouring your drink. I put a little umbrella in it again in the same color you said was your favorite. “Um…” I rub the back of my neck as I look you over once again, not able to take my eyes off you. “You look really nice tonight.” I feel a bit shy at giving you a compliment, blushing a little and playing with my rings.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I lock eyes with you as I take a sip of the drink you made me, I let out a please sigh, “Ahh! Delicious! It’s a shame that these are so strong and I don’t have a sweet metalhead who could drive me home if I got a little tipsy,” I watch you play with your rings and I wonder if we are feeling something similar. Even though this is only our third time seeing each other, something feels a little different than when we ran into each other at the grocery store. Hearing that you think I look nice feels like such a direct complement, I can’t be reading this wrong, right? When you tell someone you think they look nice…I take in your body language again, he’s definitely blushing…that means more right? He wants to get to know me more than just as a friend.

My cheeks join yours with a light flush, “You look really nice tonight too Eddie. The v neck is a really good look for you. Your um, your rings are really cool. Can I see them closer?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I lift my gaze back to yours when you compliment me back, blushing a little more when you tell me the v-neck is a good look for me. When you ask to look at my rings closer, I raise my eyebrows in surprise. “Sure.” I nod a bit dumbly before I give you both of my hands so you can see the single ring that still adorns my right hand while the three larger rings are on my left.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

My heart pounds when you extend your fingers towards me. I lean into the sight of them, thrilled to see them so close. I look up into your eyes silently asking to touch your hands, moving really slowly as I lift them up into my own and pull my gaze away from your warm brown eyes to examine the shapes of your rings. I run my thumb over the large skull, “I like this one. They suit you.” Your hands feel so warm in mine. I realize I’m basically holding both of your hands and I don’t want to let go.

I gently set your hands back down, then tuck my hair behind my ears and grab at my glass to keep them from touching you again, “So, umm, when did you start playing guitar? The little bit I got to see last time, it’s no doubt you’ve been playing for a while.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

It’s like I’m holding my breath the entire time you hold your hands in mine and look at my rings. The first thing I notice is how small your hands are compared to mine and I swallow down a whine that had threatened to escape from the sheer need to hold you in my arms. I watch you as you look down at my rings, the way you examine them. When a hair falls in front of your face, it takes everything for me not to tuck it back behind your ear. But you do it for me when you pull away, and I finally let the breath go.

My eyes land on your hands on the glass of your drink, seeing the condensation collect at the sides of your fingers before I realize you’re asking me a question. “Uh…” I have to think about it for a second, one of my eyes squinted shut as I cock my head to the side in thought before I remember. “I was 10 when Wayne gave me his old guitar so…12 years? Yeah, 12 years.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Oh damn, he looks so cute! Look at that cute little squinty face he just made, “Wow that’s a long time. No wonder you’re so good. Who’s Wayne?” My first assumption is your father but then I wonder why you wouldn’t have just said father.

I take a big sip of my drink and let the liquor loosen my inhibitions a bit because my lips just keep moving, “Your jacket is really warm. I don’t know if I want to give it back,” I look up at you with a playful flirty smile and continue sipping my drink, “I mean the weather is getting colder out.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

“Oh, sorry, Wayne is my uncle.” I chuckle before I look around, happy that it isn’t too busy so I’m able to talk with you.

My eyes wander to the way my jacket frames you, making you look even smaller and adorable yet hot at the same time. Grinning mischievously at your words, I say, “Keep it warm for me then, princess. It looks better on you than it ever could look on me anyway.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

The air in my lungs empties in an instant at your words. For a moment I feel weightless, my heart feels so light that I might float away. You called me princess. I would die happy if I could hear that just one more time. And you think I look good in your jacket? This new development is sending sparks through my body. I feel warmth spreading out from my chest all the way into my fingertips.

My bottom lip drops and then curls back up as I bite it lightly between my teeth, “O-oh, well I mean if it’s ok. I didn’t really mean I wouldn’t give it back, of course it’s yours, but it’s definitely doing a good job keeping me warm, oh” I let out a little nervous laugh, “I’m rambling sorry. Oh god, you’re supposed to be working. I’m sorry I’m keeping you from your job.” I try to distract myself by finishing the rest of my drink and playing with the little umbrella.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

“I know you didn’t really mean it, Erica,” I assure you with a chuckle, placing a hand on your forearm to try and calm your rambling. “Just like how it looks on you, yeah? And, do you see many people in here?” I look around the somewhat empty bar despite a couple regulars and the girls. “You’re not keeping me from anything, sweetheart.” I notice your glass is empty before raising my brows once I meet your eyes again. “You want another? I think I recall you saying something about how you don’t have a ‘certain metalhead’ that could drive you home.” My grin widens a bit. “I happen to be a metalhead and I’d gladly drive you home.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Your reassuring words help stop my nervous rambling. I sit up a little taller and try to regain my composure, “Thank you for the compliment Eddie. It makes me really happy. I enjoy talking with you so I don’t want you to get in trouble, but you’re right, it looks kinda slow tonight.”

I consider your offer to drive me home. I would love to have some alone time with you again but I don’t want to be selfish of your time, even if you offered I don’t want you to feel like you have to just because I want another drink. There’s also the little spout of feelings for you growing in my chest.

I can already feel the alcohol loosening me up. I’ve never been this flirtatious in my life and if I have another strong mixed drink, I might not be able to stop myself from kissing you goodnight and I’m already worried that you’ll think I’m coming on too strong, “Raincheck? That very kind metalhead told me walking around outside at night could be dangerous so I drove tonight and I wouldn’t want to leave my car here. I will take one more, lighter, drink though before your show starts.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I look over your expression after I ask you and start to internally panic for a moment. Did I overstep? She’s gonna think I’m trying to get her home and take advantage of her. Oh god I hope she doesn’t think that I just want her to have fun and make sure she gets home safe.

My heart is beating hard in my chest before you ask if we could raincheck and I let out a quiet breath of relief before you say you drove and wouldn’t want to leave your car. I grin and nod in understanding before I’m putting your empty glass away and taking out a clean one to make your second drink. “I can do that.” I say with a wink before I notice Gareth, Berry, and Jeff arrive and are setting up the stage. Once I’m finished making your drink, I set it down for you and smile. “Enjoy that, yeah? I have to go now, but, you remember Tracy right? She’ll be lookin’ after you since I can’t. Enjoy the show, princess.” I give you one more wink before I start heading for the stage.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I give Tracy a friendly smile and wave, remembering how nice she was the last time I was here. Your wink has me biting my lip again as I watch you head to the stage.

I sip my drink and watch the stage waiting for you and your band to finish setting up. My anticipation builds every minute I sit there. My mind wanders to being dragged away from your show last time but not this time. What I got to see last time was incredible so I know I'm in for a good show. I want to see you closer.

I stand from the bar stool and flatten down my skirt, grabbing my drink. I wander through the bar to an open table I see closer to the stage.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

When I get on the stage and start helping the guys, they notice you and look at me. “Is that the same girl from last week, Ed?” Jeff asks with a raised eyebrow and a grin. “Sure is, Jeff, good eyes,” I tell him as I start to hook up the amps, not looking up from what I’m doing. “She moved closer to the stage.” Barry tells me and my head shoots up, my eyes landing on you almost immediately.

I can see the rest of your outfit now. The skirt, the tights, the boots. The skirt. Jesus H Christ she’s going to be the death of me. I mentally fall to my knees with a groan at the sight of you, trying not to pay attention to your thighs too much. When I realize I’m staring, I blush deeply and give you a small wave before going back to what I was doing and cursing under my breath. I hear the guys snickering and turn to face them. “Unless you want your characters to die next session, I would shut up.” I warn. To which they roll their eyes and get back to setting up.

Once we finally do get everything set up, I walk over to the mic and tap it a few times to see if it’s working. When I see that it is, I grin and look at the small amount of people in here before my eyes land on you. “Hey, everyone. I’m Eddie, that’s Jeff on rhythm guitar,” I start to point to the other band members, my friends. “This is Barry on bass, and Gareth on drums. And we’re Corroded Coffin. Let’s break some shit.” I say with a chuckle before the owner pipes up from behind the bar, “There will be no breaking shit!” I pull away from the mic to laugh loudly. “No fun, I swear.” I look to Gareth as he counts us down.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

You look so focused on your task I wonder if you even notice that I got up. When you finally look up I smile wide at you and wave! You look so good up there I find it really hard not to just stare at your shoulders as I watch you plugging things in and moving things as you set up.

The mic feedback as you tap it gets my heart racing because I know that you’re going to start soon. I hear you introducing your bandmates and I instantly want to get to know your friends. I let out a loud laugh when the voice from behind the bar tells you not to break shit. As the music starts playing I can’t help but notice a spark in your eyes that I haven’t seen yet.

In the short time I’ve known you, seeing you perform is showing me a side of you that I want to see more of. You with your guitar up on stage, you literally seem to light up as I watch you during your first song.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Watching your reaction to each song we play is becoming one of my favorite things, encouraging me to put on my best performance as if this were a sold out show at The Garden. We play some originals, some covers, even a few metal versions of pop songs that we put together.

My eyes land on you the majority of the time I’m up on stage, taking in your smile and the way you move to the beat of the songs. It leaves me feeling a bit hot under the collar, but that could also be from playing on stage.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

As your set continues I find myself lost in your sights and sounds. My body dances and moves along in my chair and my neglected drink sits dripping condensation onto the coaster. I cannot take my eyes off of you the whole time.

Listening to all your different songs I find myself enjoying your original works the best. I want to ask you questions about who wrote them, where your inspiration comes from. Your energy that you project to even this small bar makes it seem like a crowded stadium full of screaming fans. I let my imagination run wild and picture myself supporting you as you chase your dream of being a world famous rockstar! I realize that despite our new friendship I would follow you anywhere. Some may think me naive to trust someone I barely know so blindly but they can fuck right off because the glow in your eyes as I catch you looking back at me from up on stage tells me everything I need to know.

I could watch you play for hours but sadly the night goes on and as it tends to do time passes, leaving your show nearly complete. As soon as the last note hits I jump up from my chair and cheer my heart out— clapping my hands and waving to you with a big smile.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I grin widely, a bit wild as you clap and cheer for us and the other people in the bar start to join in, I chuckle and feel a bit sheepish, rubbing the back of my sweaty neck before my eyes find yours and I send you a grateful smile and wink. Watching the way you cheer for me, for my band, it’s something I want all the time. Your encouraging words, your compliments, the way you seem to look at me. And I hope to god I’m not reading too much into this but I could swear those cheers are more for me than my band and it makes my heart skip a beat.

“Thanks for having us. We’ll see you next week!” I say to the crowd before I’m slinging my guitar off my shoulders and setting it on its stand before hopping off the stage. At first, the girls from earlier try to stop to talk to me but my eyes don’t leave you for a second. “Excuse me.” I murmur, stepping through them and making my way over to you. My breathing is a bit heavy from my performance, my bangs sticking to my forehead a little as I’m a bit sweaty. I put my hands into the back pockets of my jeans as I grin at you. “So you liked it?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I watch you hop off stage and my heart rate quickens as you walk directly over to me without stopping. I’m definitely going to blame my boldness on the alcohol but before my brain realizes what I’m doing, I hurry to meet you in a hug as you ask me if I liked the show.

My arms reach up and wrap around your neck and my feet press up on my tiptoes to squeeze our bodies together. My head tilting to the side of yours. You’re a little sweaty from being on stage but I couldn’t care less. I hug you close to me once more before pulling back, “Eddie that was amazing! I loved every second! Do you write your original works or is it one of your bandmates?” I don’t take my eyes off of you the whole time I’m talking and I feel my cheeks heating up as I made no effort to widen the gap between us after hugging you.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I’m stumbling back a little in surprise when you’re suddenly hugging me, my heart racing moments ago from being on stage to now pounding in my chest for another reason. I wrap an arm around your middle instinctively, my other hand hovering over your hip but not touching.

When you pull back, my eyes are wide from shock but I look down at you in awe as you say you loved every second, my arm loosening a little when you widen the gap. “Gareth and I both write songs.” I huff out in a breath, not realizing I stopped breathing for a moment.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

When I see how wide your eyes are as they look down at me I’m biting at my lip again, nervous that I crossed a line with my hug. I feel your arm that was wrapped around me loosen a bit as we stand there together. I tuck a loose curl behind my ear and step back just another inch and let out a breathy sigh, “That’s so cool!” I start gushing about my favorite parts and singing little lines as I remember from my favorite of your songs, getting myself all excited again I end up spinning around and dancing with excitement, “You’ve definitely got a new fan Eddie! I’ll be here every Tuesday for your shows.”

The sudden noise of your bandmates moving things on stage breaks my focus, “Do you guys need any help packing up?” I really want to find out what you're doing after this because I would spend all night talking to you if I could.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

My arms fall to my sides when you step away and I can only yearn to touch you again, my chest aching the slightest bit. But I’m soon matching your excitement when you talk about the songs we wrote and, wanting to memorize the way you sing forever and I chuckle happily when you dance a little. “Memorizing our lyrics already? You really are a dedicated fan.” I tease, reaching over and squeezing your elbow lightly.

Usually after the show is when I clock out for the night, Tuesdays always being a shorter shift for me since I’m all sweaty when I come off the stage and they don’t want me stinking up the place if I were to stay and make drinks. But I don’t want the night to end, wanting to be around you and talk to you longer. So when you offer to help, I don’t hesitate to agree. “Y-Yeah! Yes, that would be great, thank you.” I say before I walk you to the stage, offering you an arm to help you up. “Guys, this is Erica.” I look at each of them, giving them a look that says ‘be cool.’

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ─

Hearing your praise when you call me a dedicated fan has a goofy smile covering my face, sheepishly I twist my ankle back and forth on the tip of my boot and it only gets harder to hide how I feel when you touch my elbow.

When you help me onto the stage and introduce me to your friends, I feel like I’ve stepped into your world and I’m honored that you are letting me into the glimpse of who you are so I can get to know you better.

I give each of your friends a shy little hello and a wave, “It’s really nice to meet all of you. The show was amazing! You all did a really good job.” I nervously tug at the sleeves of your leather jacket, “So what can I help with?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Jeff and Gareth are both giving you a skeptical look. With everything they’ve been through in high school, with everything I’ve been through, they tend to keep their guards up when it comes to letting people in. Barry is the first to speak, “Nice to meet you too, Erica. I’m Barry.” Jeff and Gareth put on their best fake smile and mumble a ‘nice to meet you’ before they get back to putting things up.

“You can help roll up the cords,” I suggest as I hand one to you while grabbing one myself to show you the proper way so they don’t get twisted. “Real simple.” I ignore the looks I saw from Gareth and Jeff for now, hoping you didn’t notice them. I just want you to feel welcome.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

When Barry introduces himself I smile at him politely, “Hi Barry, cool shirt,” pointing loosely to the Iron Maiden logo. The other two members seem to be keeping me at arms length, offering little more than a curt nod. I definitely feel like an outsider standing with your group, especially now that the band/audience dynamic is gone. I’m thankful when you speak again and give me a task that I can help with.

For now I try to ignore the unsure stares that I get from the other two and I watch you carefully when you show me how to wrap up the cords, “Ok!” I grab one of the cords and wrap it up just as you showed me, presenting it to you hopeful that I did a good job.

While I continue wrapping cords, my eyes wander to your guitar sitting safely on its stand. The same one that I just spent the whole show staring at while it was wrapped around your body being played by your expert hands. I think back to how your fingers felt when I was looking at your rings. For some reason seeing it up close now feels different. I keep wrapping the cord up that’s in my hands as I walk over to where it’s sitting to get an even closer look. The heels of my boots clicking along the stage. I tuck my skirt under with my hand as I bend down to gently rub the tips of my fingers over the smooth polished surface, “I really like your guitar Eddie. It suits you.” I turn my head over my shoulder to look back at you with a big grin before trying once more to engage with your friends, “So how long have you all been playing together? From the sound of it I’d guess a while. You really seemed to be in sync.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

At your question, Jeff chimes in, “Ed and I have been playing together since we were little, but we started the band in 8th grade. We’ve known each other a long time.” He keeps his eyes on you for a moment longer after his last statement before looking back to what he’s doing.

“Yeah since we were wee lads,” I chuckle, grabbing Jeff’s head by my inner elbow and giving him a noogie before I let him go and he shoves me with a laugh. “Didn’t I tell you to stop doing that when we were 12?” My grin widens and I place a hand over my heart. “Come on, Jeffy, you know you love it.”

I walk over to you after that exchange and take the cables you had rolled up. “Thanks, sweetheart. You’re a real peach for the help.” Maybe it’s the fact that I still have a high from performing, maybe it’s you willingly wanting to be around me, but I can’t seem to stop smiling right now.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Watching you light up as you joke around with your friends helps me relax a little, even if they are still a little weary of me or my intentions, I’m sure it’s out of love because they care about you. It’s clear that you are all very close.

Maybe it’s the stage lights, maybe it’s the way they create a halo of shine around your hair as you stand in front of me, it could just be that big beautiful smile that has been such a source of joy for me this last week— but I’m pretty sure it’s your voice as you thank me for my help. Whatever it is, it’s warming me from the inside out and I feel my hands practically aching to hug you again, “You’re very welcome Eddie. It was my pleasure.”

Much to my sadness, with 5 of us working it doesn’t take long to get all your gear packed up. The last thing to get put away is the drum set. I decide I want to make something for you to thank you for helping to be a source of light in my life during what could’ve been a very dark time, “Wait!” I shout before Gareth packs up the large bass drum. I hurry over to my bag that I’d set down when I started helping you and pull out my camera, “Do you mind if I take a picture of that?” Pointing to your band’s logo.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I look at you curiously when you ask to take a picture of the band’s logo before smiling. “Uh, yeah, that’s fine.” I agree with a nod before having Gareth set it back down.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

As soon as Gareth sets the drum back down, I walk over and snap a quick picture on my camera, “As soon as I get this film developed I’ve got a surprise you,” I look to you with a wink first and then I address the rest of the band, “All of you!” I walk over to where you're standing and look you in the eye as I grab your hand in mine and squeeze, “I'm going to go pay my tab, I’ll be right back handsome.”

Over at the bar I wave Tracy down, “Hey, I need to pay my bill but I also wanted to thank you for the other day. That was really kind of you.”

She smiles at me, “No problem.” She takes me money and promises to slip you the tip I left without knowing it was from me.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I’m surprised when you say you’ve got a surprise for us, a bit speechless and before I can say anything you’re grabbing my hand and giving it a squeeze which just nearly sends me into orbit. I’m probably blushing like crazy when you call me handsome as well before you’re walking off to pay your tab.

“You hear that, Ed? She says she’s got a surprise for you,” Gareth nudges my side with a chuckle and I whip my head to look at him with narrowed eyes as I shove him lightly. “She said she has a surprise for all of us, dipshit, don’t make it weird.” Jeff and Barry laugh along with Gareth and I roll my eyes before I’m looking over to you again.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I hear laughter from the stage as I walk back through the bar thinking about how much fun I’ve had tonight. I know I should really get going but I don’t want tonight to end. I wish I could spend every minute with you. I take a deep breath before I reach you and decide that if I can't at least ask for your number, then nothing will ever happen.

When I reach the stage again I look up and try to catch your attention, “Eddie? I should probably get going. Would you mind walking me to my car?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

As I look at you I’ve decided in my mind that I am going to ask for your number, feeling hopeful the more I’m around you and going with my gut. I want to see more of you, and I want to be the one that makes you smile. Oh, you are definitely going to ruin my life, and I can’t fucking wait.

After you ask me to walk you to your car, I perk up, seeing my opportunity and not wasting it for a second. “Uh yeah! Yeah, no problem.” I hop off the stage to stand in front of you, giving you a slightly nervous smile. “Shall we?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I swallow hard and nod. Walking slowly beside you, savoring your energy, your smell, and the warmth that your presence has on my mind. Walking this close to you has my heart pounding! I wait until we are outside to speak again, “I know I’ve probably said it a dozen times but I really enjoyed your show Eddie. Your friends seemed really nice too,” I let out a nervous little giggle, “Although I’m not sure Gareth liked me very much.”

Just as I finish talking we reach the driver's side door of my car. I know my face must be bright red but my eyes are locked with yours again as I try to keep my courage and ask you for your number. The words build up in my throat but when I open my mouth again all that comes out is, “Thank you for walking me to my car Eddie. You’re a real gentleman.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

“I’m glad you enjoyed it, sweetheart.” I place a hand on the small of your back briefly before dropping it back to my side and clearing my throat. When we get to your car, my heart is pounding and I try to muster the courage to ask for your number. All I have to do is ask. It should be easy. Why is this so hard?!

“Thanks for coming out tonight, Erica,” I say softly as I look over your features, seeing your flushed cheeks and I bite my lip. I notice a loose curl in your face and my fingers twitch with the want to tuck it behind your ear but I resist. “Um…” Jesus why won’t the words come out?! Just ask for her number! “Drive home safe, okay?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

My body somehow simultaneously freezes and melts at the same time when I feel your hand on the small of my back, I want to grab it and tell you to keep it there forever, fuck! Your soft touches are going to make me fall to my knees for you!

My lips part and suck in a very shaky breath before chewing on my lip again, “I will Eddie, you too. Um,” I’m screaming at myself in my head— just ask! I start talking really fast, so fast I’m not even sure you will understand what I said, “IfyougivemeyournumberIcancallyoutoletyouknowIgothomesafe…”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I give a small nod and go to turn away to walk back in, already mentally yelling at myself for being such a coward before you’re suddenly talking really fast. Did…did she just ask for my number? Did I hear that right? Quickly, maybe a bit too quickly, I turn back around to face you. “Come again?” I ask as I take a step closer.

“Was that cute little ramble of words just now you asking for my number?” I place a hand on my chest. “Because that isn’t fair, sweetheart. I was supposed to ask for yours.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I relax a bit when you say you were about to also ask me the same question. In the hopeful part of my brain it makes me wonder if you are also dancing around these budding feelings, just as I am. Too afraid that the other might not reciprocate, “Oh yeah?” I can’t help but smile at you when you place your hand over your chest.

I go digging in my bag for a pen, “Well in that case,” I take your hand in mine and lift it up. The tip of my tongue sticks out in concentration as I write my phone number onto the back of your hand, adding a little heart next to my name afterwards, “How about you call me and let me know my favorite rockstar got home safely?” The amount of self control it takes not to kiss you goodnight is palpable, “Goodnight Eddie. I’ll see you later.” I give your hand one last squeeze before getting in my car and heading home.

February 1988 is when my boyfriend Jackson came to me with an idea. He was my high school sweetheart. After six years together I’d follow him anywhere. Putting my faith and trust in someone who had never steered me wrong before was easy. One day after my night shift at the Indianapolis Public Library I came home to our shared apartment and he planted the idea.

“Hey so I’ve been thinking,” he rubbed the back of his head with that boyish smile I fell hard and fast for, “I kinda think it’s time we settled down. I found a really good gig down in Hawkins.”

At first I was surprised but a few key points from his proposal stood out. He wanted to settle down. Did that mean maybe starting a family? The thought alone gave me nervous butterflies. He said he already found a job so that must mean he’s been thinking about this for a while, “What kind of job is it?” I asked.

He explains that he’d still be doing construction, helping to rebuild old buildings that collapsed during the earthquake back in spring of ‘86. While I’d never actually been to Hawkins, Indiana everyone in the midwest knew about that earthquake. It was such a freak and unusual event that it got media coverage for months and months after. From photos that the news had shared it looked like a quaint small town, “As long as the library is still standing I say let’s do it!”

So less than a week later we were all packed up and leaving our current lease earlier than anticipated but starting this next stage of adventure in our lives together couldn’t wait!

We’ve been here in Hawkins now about six months and from that first night onward everything began to change. It started slow. Extra work shifts and late nights meant most of my time was spent alone, which typically wouldn’t have been an issue. I don’t mind being alone. Especially when I get into a groove on one of my paintings or the latest chapter of my fantasy novel. Popping in my favorite metal mixed cassette and letting the creativity flow through my limbs was never a problem because I knew when Jackson got home from work he’d come wrap his arms around me, kiss my cheek, before the two of us would spend the rest of our night together.

Now it was excuse after excuse, “Sorry. It’s gonna be another late night, they need me to finish this” or “I was just so tired when I came home last night I slept on the couch”. With every passing day my heart ached, yearning to be close once again to the boy I’d been so enamored with. I could feel him slipping through my fingertips like water. Everything came to a head one night when I vowed to try one more time to reconnect with him, hoping to recapture his attention.

One rare night that he was home early I attempted to engage him in a casual conversation, “Hey so I found this really cool looking bar in town yesterday. They have local bands that come and play, the food and drinks I saw people having looked really good. We should check it out sometime.”

He reluctantly agreed at first but then, much to my surprise he seemed to really like the idea. Even going so far as to suggest going tonight, “Yeah ok, let’s go. I’m gonna stop at the yard first, drop a few things off and then I’ll meet you there. Let’s drive separately.” At this point I was willing to take what I could get from him so I didn’t press the driving issue. I flashed him a big smile before getting dressed and heading out the door, “Ok! I’ll see you there.”

Heading to the bar alone wasn’t something I’d ever done before. All times prior to this I would’ve been with Jackson or friends on the rare occasion that they came down from the city. Having moved away from all of my friends and only really having the older ladies down at the library to keep me company, this was a very new experience. Pulling into the parking lot, I took a deep breath before heading inside.

The atmosphere was lively for a Tuesday evening. Jackson wasn’t among the handful of patrons milling about at the bar or the tables, but that wasn’t a surprise considering his truck wasn’t outside in the parking lot and he did say that he was going to stop at the yard before heading here. Maybe something held him up. I’ll get a drink while I wait for him, I think to myself as I take up an empty seat at the bar.

Standing behind the bar I see a sight that gives me butterflies in my stomach for the first time in a very long time. His long brown curls bounced slightly as he walked back and forth tending to the folks at the bar. My eyes follow him and watch as he mixes a drink for a elderly woman sitting a few seats down from where I am. He hands the woman her glass with a big bright smile, before I get a great view of his eyes when he greets me.

Then my throat goes dry. For a moment I nearly forget why I’m here in the first place. “Can I um–” I clear my throat as I smile politely back at him, “Can I get a long island iced tea please?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Once the city turns against you, it's maybe best to keep running. I didn't make it too far, though. Just outside of Hawkins, really. I couldn't really stand to just abandon Wayne, abandon my friends after all they've done for me. Shared trauma really does tie people together. With the hush money from the government, I was able to get a place of my own. Nothing state of the art. Another trailer works just fine. It's what I'm used to. But this place is called Rolling Acres.

Thankfully, getting a job was easy. It's still in Hawkins, but the drive isn't terrible. Mostly working nights as a bartender at The Hideout. My band and I still play there, too. Still on Tuesdays. I avoid working there on weekends, though. It gets too busy with people my age. Best to just avoid them. Everyone else doesn't seem too bothered with me, though.

It was one of those nights at work where it wasn't terribly busy. Just the way I liked it, chatting and laughing with the regulars and getting decent tips. I catch someone walk in and come sit at the bar at the corner of my eye while fixing a drink for an older woman who tends to get a bit too comfortable with me when she's had too much, making the drink sweet and barely putting any alcohol in there for taste. Turning to you, my eyes flick up and down quickly to take you in, knowing immediately that you're not from around here. After asking what you'd like and you tell me a Long Island, I grin. "Got a favorite choice of vodka?"

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Your voice has a huskiness to it that makes my brain go fuzzy. The grin I see looking back at me, a sort of pleased looking smirk asking me if I have a favorite vodka. I shake my head, “Not really. Let’s go with the dealer's choice. Whatever you would recommend.” I look at your shirt trying to find a name tag but I don’t see one. I wonder briefly if you’ve worked here so long that you are just known by everyone anyways. Hawkins is a pretty small town.

I look around the bar while I wait. It’s got a warm feeling, like after just a few visits one might be considered a regular already. My eyes flit anxiously back and forth between the tables wondering if Jackson is maybe already here and just didn’t see me come in. I try not to let the nerves that he might not show up creep into my expression. The glass clinking against the table startles me. I look back and get another great view of your warm brown eyes. I nod and take my first sip, “Perfect! Thank you. It’s just what I needed.”

I sip my drink at a snail’s pace, draggin out each swallow of the harsh liquid. Hope fills my mind everytime I hear the door chime ring and I turn hoping to see my boyfriend’s face but instead it’s just another local who waves to their party upon entering. Before I know it my drink is halfway gone and still no sign of Jackson. I let out a heavy sigh and try to distract myself. I look around and notice lights illuminating the stage at the back of the bar. I turn back towards the bar hoping to see that you aren’t busy. Wow, I think to myself, how cliche. Drowning the poor bartender in your sorrows huh? I motion with my hand trying to get your attention as I point with my glass towards the stage, “Hey! Do you know if there’s anyone playing tonight?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

My grin widens when you say "dealer's choice" because that means I get to make a traditional Long Island. "It'll take a few minutes, but I promise you won't be disappointed." I assure you with a wink before I get to work on your drink, pulling out the ingredients from the bottom shelf where I keep the good stuff when I want to make fancier drinks.

I talk with the customers as I make your drink, rolling my eyes as they tease me for pulling out the fancy liquors. “Hey, hey, come on. It’s rare when someone lets me do my own thing.” I chuckle and shake my head, picking up the tequila and pouring it in the mixer. “Excuse me for getting excited.”

My eyes wander to you every now and then, seeing that you keep looking around. Is she waiting for someone? I think to myself. Of course she is, look at her. How is she not single? When I’m finally done with your drink, I set it in front of you. “Enjoy, sweetheart. If you hate it, it’s free.” But I feel proud when you say you like it. “Let me know if you need anything else. Probably won’t make you another one like this cuz it’s a bit strong, though. Gotta make sure you get home okay.”

I leave you alone, getting back to work and taking care of other customers as they come in. It doesn’t go unnoticed to me that you seem to still be sitting alone the longer you are here, seeing your hopeful expression when someone else comes in before it falls in disappointment.

You stay at the back of my mind as I clean up a spot on the bar once the customers have left before you’re getting my attention. After hearing your question, I smirk, draping the rag over my shoulder. “As a matter of fact, it’s my band playing tonight.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I hear you say that it’s your band playing tonight and suddenly a bunch of questions flood my mind. I sit up straight holding my delicious drink you made for me in my hand, forgetting for a moment about why I came out tonight in the first place, “Oh my god really? What kind of music? I’m a big fan of metal and hard rock myself. What instrument do you play?”

The front door to the bar opens again and I hear the chime that signaled yet another person entering. I turn, once again hoping that I’ll see Jackson’s face but no. My good mood from talking with you drops as I take a big gulp from my glass and stare at the ice with a heavy crestfallen sigh.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I can’t help but chuckle at your excitement, hearing your rapid fire questions and I can’t help but find you adorable. “Lucky for you, we play heavy metal. And I play lead guitar.”

When you turn to the door again, seeing the light that was briefly inside you leave, it leaves a small pain in my chest for a moment. Clearing my throat, I point to your drink. “Would you want another? I can make you another Long Island, but not the same way as last time like I said earlier. Don’t want you on your ass, you know?” I say to try and lighten the mood and to see you smile again.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I try to smile when you ask me if I’d like another drink, “Yeah that sounds great. It’s a shame I drove myself here because that was the best drink I’ve had in a long time. I guess that just means I’ll have to come back sometime and see you again.” My lips curl up in a smile that spreads all the way to my eyes and nose, causing it to crinkle with delight. “What time does your show start?”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I admire the way your nose crinkles when you smile, happy to see that twinkle in your eyes once again. “Guess so, sweetheart.” I say softly with a small grin before looking up to the stage when you ask when we go on. “Just a few, actually.” I take your empty glass and pull out another one from under the bar to make your second drink. “The guys are setting up now, so I’ll be up there just as soon as I finish your drink. Gotta serve the pretty girl first.” I say with a wink before I take the shaker in my hands after sealing it and start to shake your drink. After a moment, I pop the seal and pour it into the glass and set it in front of you before putting a little umbrella in it to get you to laugh.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Your little grin you flash me as you call me sweetheart and start making my drink, sends the butterflies in my stomach fluttering up into my chest. Their wings flitting faster and faster when you call me pretty. I feel my bottom lip twitching, itching to curl up and be bitten between my teeth. I shamelessly stare at your arms while you shake the metal shaker and pour my drink into a fresh glass. The little umbrella you stick in makes me chuckle, “Aww, how’d you know that was my favorite color?” I lift the glass to my lips and take a sip, “Still a winner! Thank you good sir, you really know how to treat a lady.”

While I wait for your show to start I continue looking around the bar, definitely trying to force my eyes to look at anything but you. I notice some of the customers you were talking with earlier were staring at me and looking away quickly when I make eye contact. I suddenly feel like an outsider. From what I’ve seen, everyone here, the staff and the customers, clearly have that small town mentality where everyone knows everyone. Except me. I don’t know anyone. Even though I’ve been here for over 6 months, I haven’t really made any friends. Something about the way you smiled at me made me think that it’s time to change that.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

"Happy to serve you, sweet girl." I flirt with a wink. I have to go up, but if you need anything, that's Tracy over there." I gesture to the female bartender who is clocking in. "She may not be able to make drinks like me, but she's a close second. Don't let her know I said that. Enjoy the show, yeah?" I stand up, walking backwards and not taking my eyes off you for a moment, my hands in the back pockets of my jeans. I give you a small grin before finally turning around and making my way to the stage to help set up the rest of the equipment.

Jeff nudges me when I get on the stage. "Who's the girl, Eddie?" He asks, looking your way briefly. I shrug. "Don't know. Pretty sure she's new to town." Gareth chimes in, "She definitely is, looks a bit lost. Is she waiting for someone?" I’m too busy slinging my guitar strap over my head to look over at Gareth. "Didn't ask." I try to keep the conversation short, not wanting to be bombarded with questions just for talking to a pretty girl. "She's pretty," Barry voices after a second. "Are you guys just gonna gawk or are we gonna play?" After finally getting their attention away from you, I take the front and speak into the mic. "Uh hey. Most of you know who we are but...I do see a few new faces so I won't be an asshole and not introduce ourselves." I look at you and send you a wink along with a wide grin. "We're Corroded Coffin, and we're here to melt your fuckin faces. Hope you guys are ready."

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

When you take to the stage and introduce yourselves, I find myself captivated by your presence. Even from my seat at the bar I catch your little wink and I can’t help but wonder if that little wink was for me. I mean I’m certainly not aware of who you or who your band is so maybe I was your target audience with that comment.

I lose myself in your sounds as the concert gets underway. I’m suddenly really happy that Jackson isn’t here yet because he hates my taste in music so I know he won’t enjoy this experience as much as I am. I dance a bit in my chair, moving my head and drumming my free hand against the tattooed thigh exposed from the skirt I’m wearing. You sound so good up there that I don’t even hear the person behind me calling my name.

“Hey! Hey Erica!” Finally I hear Jackson calling my name as he approaches. I pull my eyes away from yours and turn to those of my boyfriend, “Oh hey, I was staring to get worried that you’d gotten lost or something. Sit down, the show just started.”

He frowned as he looked at the stage, “You know I don’t like this loud death shit. Come on- let’s get out of here!”

I felt myself torn. I want to stay and watch the rest of your show but I know I should be wanting to go with my boyfriend, I think about the bright happy grin you gave me just before leaving to go perform. But you’re just a stranger. I shouldn’t be worried about disappointing you by leaving early. But I am. Jackson was starting to get impatient, “Come on! Pay your tab and let’s get the fuck out of here.”

I pout and swallow the rest of my Long Island and call over the bartender who now stood in your place. She smiles and asks me if I need anything. I hand her enough cash to pay for my two drinks and give you a generous tip, “Can you make sure the sweet curly haired bartender gets this tip please? Thank you!”

I try to sneak one last glance at the stage as Jackson grabs my hand and leads me out of the bar through the front door. I find myself hoping that you don’t think I hated your music since I left early. I’ll have to come back another night and let you know how much I enjoyed what I was able to see.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Whenever I play, all of my worries from the past few years melts away, the only thing that matters being the music and my band. All the judgmental faces that I feel looking at me disappear and I feel at peace.

My eyes seem to wander to you every now and then, wondering if you’re enjoying the set and grinning a bit wickedly when I see you dancing in your seat or drumming to the rhythm. It leaves a giddiness inside me that I haven’t felt in a long time and I try to ride this feeling for as long as I can.

When I see a guy get your attention, I falter the smallest bit, going unnoticed by everyone listening except for Jeff, Gareth, and Barry. I make eye contact with Jeff briefly, him giving me a look to ask if I’m okay and I nod curtly as we continue with the song. I watch the interaction between you two, noticing how impatient and annoyed the guy looks before you’re suddenly finishing your drink and giving Tracy money. Is she leaving? But we just started! And I can’t figure out why I’m starting to feel a bit disappointed as I watch you leave with him. But when you look to the stage a final time, hope fills my chest even as you do leave. And I know that I’ll see you again.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Jackson’s tight grip on my hand releases with a harsh flick once we are outside in the parking lot. I’m searching his face desperately for a clue as to where his annoyed mood came from. He wasn’t overjoyed when we left the apartment, but he certainly wasn’t this pissed off, “Hey what’s wrong? I thought we were going out to have a good time tonight.”

We stand in between where his truck and my car are parked beside one another. He looked down at me with a look I’ve never seen on his face before, “Seemed like you were having a perfectly good time without me.”

“What the hell are you talking about?” I try not to raise my voice at his sudden defensive tone, “I spent all night waiting for you to show up! What did you have to do at the yard that was so important?”

He goes silent. I cock my brows up at him waiting for him to answer my perfectly valid question, “Well? Hm? You pulled me away from a show I was really enjoying just so we could stand out here and argue?”

His tone is so spiteful as he practically spits his next words at me, “Looked to me like you were enjoying the bartender more than the music.”

My jaw goes slack at his accusations, “Jackson what the hell are you talking about?” I look away from him for just a split second when I see a few people stopping and staring. My voice lowers, “Can we please continue this conversation at home?”

“I’m not going home,” the words fall from his lips so low and quickly that I almost don’t catch them.

“What do you mean you’re not coming home?” I fail miserably at keeping the shakiness from my voice.

He stiffens and rushes out a curt explanation, “While you were gone I moved all my stuff out. I only came here to tell you goodbye. The apartment is yours, here’s my key. Goodbye Erica.” And with that he was slamming the door and speeding away.

I stand there alone dumbfounded, I feel my body slide to the ground against my car door. I don’t know whether to yell, scream, cry, or all of the above. Instead I crumble. I don’t know how long I sit there on the ground wishing the earth would just open up and swallow me whole.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

While the music still plays, it gets louder and fading with every swing of the entrance opening and closing, at one point the music crescendos when the doors open and a man falls with a thud onto his ass. “That’ll teach you, you bastard.” Tracy spits at his feet, about to head inside before she sees you crying. She remembers you from earlier, how you were kind enough to leave Eddie a generous tip before you left with a guy that no doubt just broke your heart. “Oh, honey.” Tracy coos as she makes her way over to you and squats down to you level, placing her hands on your arms. “Why don’t we go back inside and I make you some tea? I bring my own from home.”

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Cha0ticSpaceBi .* :☆ﾟ. ──

I can feel my vision clouding as the tears well up in my eyes. I don’t want to cry. I don’t want that asshole to have the satisfaction, not that he’d know one way or the other considering he took off like a bat outta hell. I can’t allow myself to wonder how he was able to move all his stuff out so fast. The possibility that he had…help…is too much right now. I try everything to convince myself to stand again when I hear a friendly sounding voice getting closer. I look up and see, what was her name again? Tracy, the nice bartender. What’s she doing out here? She offers to take me back inside for tea. I don’t think I can even speak let alone stand.

I simply nod my head with a sigh as she helps me up back into the bar and leads me to the back kitchen area. My ears feel like they are filled with cotton because she tries to say something to me but I don’t respond. I feel like a zombie.

But I can hear your music. I know you're still playing because I can hear the sounds above all the noise in my head. Tracy hands me a warm cup and I somehow manage to sip it slowly and thank her. We stand there together for a bit and I start to feel a little better. But then I hear clapping.

Is your show over? For some reason I start to panic. You can’t see me like this! The thought of your sweet smile and warm brown eyes fill my mind and I can’t bear to have to see me in this state, I need to go before you finish, “Thank you so much for your help. I really appreciate it. This tea was delicious. I really should get going.”

I hurry back through the bar and out to the parking lot, hiding my face on the off chance you could see it from where you are. I don’t try to look for you, instead making a beeline for my car.

Back at my apartment I breakdown. I hug my pillow and after hours of tears my mind wanders back to you and how kind you were to me. The last thought I have before exhaustion takes me is that I didn’t catch your name.

── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ Eddie .* :☆ﾟ. ──

As we continue to play, I pay attention to the crowd more since you left, to the band. I feel alive tonight, more so than how I usually feel during a gig, and I don’t really know why. After a couple more songs, I notice a drunk guy getting handsy with Tracy. I know I don’t have to worry about her though, continuing my set as she punches him before throwing him out of the bar. It makes Gareth laugh from behind the drums and I laugh during an instrumental break.

After a few moments, Tracy comes back inside with…is that you? You’re still here? Why do you look so sad? What happened with that guy? Luckily, we only have two more songs left before we finish our set and I can ask you what happened, ask you if you need anything. It worries me when I notice just how distraught you look all the way from the stage and it makes me happy to see how caring Tracy is being.

When we finished our final song, I say a quick goodnight to everyone before I start to help the guys break everything down a bit too quickly and frantically. Gareth notices it and rolls his eyes. “Just go talk to her before you break something.” I smile at him gratefully before turning around, seeing you quickly making an exit. I try calling you but I realize I don’t know your name. “Shit, hey!” I call out as I try to follow you outside, but, once I’m out there, I’ve lost sight of you, not knowing which car is yours. “Damn it.” I sigh to myself as I run a hand down my face.