Celestial Coitus ♡

them: you didnt even send anyone anything

My ass w bad vision:

So the other two in my group are used to my antics by now. We’re all friends, so the pair of them decide that the one guy in our group gets to be the nurse. Now, my Juliet and I have been friends for a couple months by this point, so I decide to be a little more dramatic.

We put Juliet on a spinny chair, and pump it up as tall as it goes, and my baby, closeted lesbian ass crouches on the floor, ready to be as melodramatic as possible. Like, I’m about to do a rendition that makes William himself walk into the class and tell me to take it back a notch or twelve.

And then I look up.

And holy shit.

There she is, Juliet, haloed in the worst fluorescent light known to mortals across the globe. Light just streaming down around her, that weird off-green colour that it always is. And she’s the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen. My little gay soul is barely holding on as the words barely leave my lips, breathlessly. “But soft… what light from yonder window breaks?”

And Juliet was the sun. Romeo was not exaggerating that line at all.

when u get sports

REALLY?

REALLY?!!

She did lose weight. In some regard, this was effective. But she lost the weight because she felt too physically ill to eat. She reported feeling nauseated and lethargic all the time. She reported vomiting after most meals. I sat in the coffee shop and pulled up website after website, explaining why consuming essential oils is dangerous and why essential oil sales reps should not be trusted. Because the essential oils actually did make her lose weight, she was reluctant to stop, but being a sensible person, she did agree to stop consuming them. And she’s not a stupid person. She and her husband are both well-off, college-educated people.

I am a preschool teacher.

This is my “alone zone.”

At any time of the day, if my kids are feeling stressed, they can go here to cool down. There’s stress toys, silly putty, bubbles, sensory bottles…there’s books and headphones to block out the loud noises.

The only thing they have to do is “check in” by putting their picture on which emotion they’re feeling so I know how I can help them when they’re ready.

Kids. Need. Space.

Kids. Need. Coping. Mechanisms.

Not. Time-outs.

me: